Killing Time (6 page)

It wasn’t far to room eleven’s door, but by the time I got Koda there, I was trembling with fatigue. It took a couple tries to get the key in the lock, but the thing finally shot home and I hip-checked the door open. The room was as ghastly as I’d known it would be, but at the moment I was too tired to care. Staggering across the hideous mustard-colored carpet, replete with cringe-worthy stains and cigarette burns, I wrestled the disgusting bedspread off one-handed and dropped it on the floor—no telling how long it’d been since the thing was cleaned or what kind of nastiness was embedded in it. Letting Koda sag onto the sheet-covered bed—still nasty, but an improvement over the bedspread—I hustled to the truck and grabbed my jacket and backpack. After locking the pickup, I went back into the motel room, shut the door and thumbed the knob’s latch.

I leaned against the closed door and looked at Koda’s unconscious form. Even like this, with blood caked on his forehead and his skin pale rather than its usual tawny-gold shade, the man was gorgeous.

Crossing the room, I sat beside him on the bed. Watching his chest rise and fall, I was astonished by my enormous relief that he still breathed—for a while in the truck, I’d been terrified he’d stopped. Leaning over him, I brushed the curtain of black hair from his face, grimacing to find that some of the strands were stuck in dried blood. Easing them loose, I was shocked at the tender, fiercely protective feelings churning through me to see him injured and unconscious. Without the anger and his closed expression, with his features relaxed as they were, I could see the man beneath the warrior. The Koda with the generous heart, the one who was passionately loyal to his friends. The Koda of the silken midnight hair and flashing onyx eyes, who moved with the virile grace of a panther in human form. The Koda who, judging by the laugh lines, felt great joy and smiled often.

Touching a tentative fingertip to the lines at the corners of his mouth, I felt a pang that I’d never seen him smile. I couldn’t understand it, but it hurt that I so badly wanted to.

I lifted my hand to cup the right side of his face, the angle of his cheekbone, the slight hollow beneath. Realizing I had no right to do this, to take such liberties with a man as proud and strong as Koda, I pulled back…and nearly shrieked when his warm hand captured mine.

His black eyes looked bottomless as he studied me. “Why?”

Confused, my heart racing, I stammered, “Why what?”

He frowned as if his head hurt. Which, I realized, it probably did. “The necklace and remaining bracelet aren’t powerful enough to bind you to me. Why didn’t you leave?”

“I don’t know.” I tried to pull away, but he tightened his grip. Swallowing noisily, I squeezed my eyes shut before forcing them open again and meeting his dark gaze. “Why did you absorb the binding’s energy? Why didn’t you let it hurt me?”

He blinked a few times. “I don’t know.”

I had to laugh at the astonishment in his voice, as if he’d massively surprised himself. Changing the subject, I asked, “You okay?”

He let go of my hand and sat up, the effort slow and painful like an old man’s. “I will be.” Koda touched the wound on his forehead, wincing. “Did you do this?”

“No, you did.” At his arch look, I grinned. “You fell head-first into your truck’s side window.”

He flinched. “Did I hurt the truck?”

I snorted. “I could make a comment about your hard head, but it just wouldn’t be sporting.”

Koda eased himself to his feet and stood swaying, glaring at me when I offered a supporting hand.

“Pride goeth before the face-plant,” I told him in a superior tone.

He glowered. “If I can’t make it ten feet on my own, we have bigger problems than my unwillingness to accept help from a beautiful woman.”

I went still, my cheeks flushing as a witty comeback froze on my lips. Koda thought I was beautiful?
Koda?

Oblivious to my damaged mental condition, he shuffled over to the window, scowling at the stained curtains before pushing them aside and looking out the dirty glass. “I wasn’t impressed by your choice of hideouts when I was tracking you,” he informed me. “I’ve no intention of staying in this one any longer than necessary.”

“We’re leaving? But we just got here,” I protested, thinking how I’d blown a hundred dollars.

“Which means the fleas, lice and bedbugs that call this dump home won’t have had a chance to attach themselves to either one of us.”

“Geez, when did you become such a dandy?” I muttered, stung.

He cranked an eyebrow at me, not deigning to comment.

I squirmed. “They only go after humans, anyway. Not supernaturals.”

It hit me then that I was without transportation and I grimaced, dreading what I’d have to do to get another bike. I had only the clothes I was wearing, too, meaning I’d need more cash if I wanted even a clean pair of undies to put on tomorrow.

Koda turned away from the window to look fully at me. Taking in my expression, he swore and came to stand beside me. “I’m sorry, Sephti. It’s difficult for me, being weak. You took care of me when I could not care for myself. When it clearly would have been to your benefit to leave me where I lay.”

I smiled, absurdly feeling shy—an emotion I couldn’t ever recall experiencing, not even once. Backing off a few feet, I used the excuse of picking up my jacket to put even more space between us. “Where do you want to go?”

He didn’t answer right away. Watching me, he finally asked, “Have you ever stayed someplace nice? Someplace with room service and clean sheets? With endless hot water and sweet-smelling shampoo? Where the staff calls you ‘ma’am’?”

At the image, I laughed out loud before realizing he was serious.

His gaze sharpened as he read me correctly. Letting out a breath of air, the exhalation far too forceful to be a sigh, Koda growled, “Then it’s damn time you did.” He spun on his heel and almost went down as his balance left him.

“Maybe I should drive,” I muttered, moving to his side.

I’m not sure which one of us was more surprised when he laced his arm around my waist and leaned into me. I told myself I didn’t pull away only because he was injured.

I’ve always been a lousy liar.

I’d once heard that flashbacks of your life were supposed to happen when you were dying. That I was having vivid ones standing in the foyer of a penthouse hotel room only made it more surreal.

The impeccably mannered, black-suited bellman who’d led the way through the palatial halls to our jaw-dropping suite bid us a well-modulated good-night as he closed the immense double doors behind him. The tiny sound of the deadbolt sliding home when Koda flipped it was absorbed by thick Oriental carpets and heavy silk draperies, as if so plebeian a sound had no place within these sumptuous walls.

So what was someone like me doing here?

Rooted to the marble-floored entry and peering into the impeccably decorated living room, I cringed at the idea of touching anything—while my camouflage could fool humans, it was all illusion. I was covered head-to-toe in soot, a couple days’ worth of grime, the residue of several fights and whatever nastiness I’d brushed against at the hot-sheet motel. No way was I getting near the gorgeous upholstered furniture…crap, I was terrified of leaving sooty scuff marks on the pristine floor I stood frozen on. Wondering frantically if I could make it back out the door without touching anything, I eyed the short distance between me and escape.

The weight of Koda’s regard lifted my gaze from the acres of snowy marble and exquisite carpets. Shadows flickered in his eyes when he saw me looking at him and an awkward moment passed. He surprised me by turning away first, but not before I caught a glimpse of…what? My mind whispered
vulnerability.
Just as quickly, I shook off the absurd idea. Not Koda. The man was as impervious as granite.

Clearing his throat, he dug around in a dufflebag the bellman had left on a mahogany luggage rack. Without looking up, Koda said, “Do you want to clean up first?”

Eyeing the immaculate floor between my scuffed boots and a door I assumed led to the bathroom, I shook my head. “No way,” I muttered on a fervent breath.

He flicked an inscrutable glance at me, his expression darkening as he took in the fact that I’d come no further into the room. He rubbed a hand across his own soot-covered face and stalked to my side. Bending over, he swiped his blackened palm across the white marble floor before straightening to meet my astonished gaze. I had to laugh at the challenge in his eyes, especially when I noticed that the corners of his mouth were twitching.

Would wonders never cease? Koda was—almost—smiling.

Shaking off the shock, I winced. “You didn’t have to do that.”

He quirked a brow before turning away. “Didn’t I?”

Watching his broad back as he walked off, I realized I was now holding my garrote-bracelet and sheathed daggers. His having returned them and then turning his back to me seemed to indicate…my brain stuttered and started up again…that maybe he…
trusted
me.

Nonplussed, I re-armed myself, relieved by the familiar weights of my twin daggers and the bangle at my wrist. Feeling more like myself, I reached down and tugged off my boots, leaving them lying there as I tentatively edged into the penthouse suite in sock feet.

Keeping my grimy hands firmly tucked into my armpits, I checked out the sumptuous tapestry-covered sofa, thinking how wonderful it would be to sink into its vast softness. Sidling further into the living area, I inhaled the sweet fragrance of fresh flowers and investigated a huge arrangement in a crystal vase before letting my gaze rove around the room. The ceilings were twelve feet tall and the walls were comprised of enormous arched windows, through which I could see what looked like a lush garden. Beautiful platinum-colored draperies were swagged back from a series of French doors that led outside.

Seeing my interest, Koda said, “They lead to a private terrace.”

I looked away, even more unbalanced. The knowledge that he was far more aware of me than I’d realized twined with my unease at the hedonistic luxury and sheer size of the suite. My stable had been about eight hundred square feet and held twenty-five bitterns in floor-to-ceiling bunks—
bunks,
ha! Shelves was more accurate. It seemed incredibly decadent not to pack this much larger place with people.

My mind filled with images of my breath fogging on wintry mornings, of shuddering violently under the bare blanket we each were given, of the creaking soreness of rising before dawn after having tried to sleep on the unyielding boards that comprised a bittern’s bed. Looking down at the plush carpet beneath my worn socks, I let my toes dig into the thick silk weave for just a second. I hadn’t known floor coverings could be so soft, could feel so pleasant beneath my feet.

Wrapping my arms more tightly around myself, I chewed my bottom lip—I didn’t belong here.

Turning to leave, I ran into Koda as he came up behind me. He caught my elbow easily in one hand, steadying me. Clearing my throat, I disengaged and put a little space between us. “Koda, look, I—”

“You’ve got to be hungry,” he interrupted, his tone easy but his gaze sharp and way too aware. “I’m going to get a shower and then I’ll order dinner.”

My stomach grumbled audibly at the mention of food, bringing heat to my cheeks. I wavered. Surely, I could eat something before I left? Just a quick bite? Then my gaze drifted around the exquisite room again and I firmed up my resolve. “No, thanks. I really need to be…” My words trailed off as Koda walked away, disappearing into a doorway on the living room’s other side. “…going,” I finished lamely.

I tore my gaze from the door he had left ajar. Food forgotten, the sound of the shower being turned on brought a flash of what he’d look like with water slicking his long, black hair, cascading along his tawny skin, streaming down his broad chest…

“Get a freaking grip,” I growled to myself, staggered by the strength of the image and my reactions to it. Even more disconcerting was the stark realization that I hadn’t thought even once about checking the room’s perimeter or identifying escape routes. Scrubbing at my face, I drew a deep, shaky breath. “What is
wrong
with me?”

Koda’s voice drifted from the other room. “You need to eat.”

I jumped, startled that he’d heard me. Rubbing my face even harder, trying to get my brain to take a stab at some form of higher function, I gave a shaky laugh. “Yeah. That must be it.” I sighed, figuring my thready voice wouldn’t convince Koda, but at a loss as to what to do about it.

I wandered restlessly around the living area, arms firmly crossed. A quick thought had me looking at my suspiciously less-sooty hands and I realized that—as distracted as I was—they were markedly cleaner because I’d smeared most of it all over my face.

Great. Just great.

Forcing my libidinous brain to focus, I began the long-overdue reconnaissance of the suite. A quick check of two doors off the living room proved them to be bedrooms, each with a gloriously appointed king-size bed covered by mountains of pillows and a fluffy comforter. Both rooms had a private bathroom, in addition to the one Koda was…I firmly steered my mind back to the task at hand.

Returning to the living room, I paced past the long wall with its huge windows, scowling at the total lack of security. Inviting they may be, but they were a weak point in the room’s defenses. Pulling open the French doors, I stalked out into the garden and made it ten feet before freezing at the sheer loveliness assailing my senses.

Although we were in the heart of Dallas, the city’s sounds seemed far away. Situated in the middle of the Turtle Creek area, The Mansion was surrounded by blocks of heavy woods, broad parks and jogging trails. Our rooftop terrace on the boutique hotel’s third floor was nestled in the tops of the mature oaks and magnolias. It felt like being in an aerie, aloft in a green and vibrant world.

A full moon hung just overhead, filling the night sky with its silvery mass and casting its ethereal light across the lush private terrace. Enormous urns were everywhere, overflowing with gorgeous flowering plants, towering trees and thick greenery. The sweet perfume of hibiscus, gardenia and magnolia blossoms soothed my senses as the musical sound of falling water led me to a small fountain in the garden’s center. Sitting on the tiled rim, still warm from the sun, I couldn’t resist dipping my fingers in the cool water and watching the drops fall like jewels back into the fountain’s rippling surface. It felt like I’d stumbled into a hidden, magical oasis and a deep peace stole over me. The tension in my muscles eased and I inhaled, letting the flowers’ fragrance and the balmy night air fill my lungs.

A smile stole across my lips at this one, small part of my heritage that pleased me—the narcotic-like effect nature had on fae.

Movement brought my head up languidly as Koda came to stand by my side. Unable to resist, I let my gaze traverse his beautiful form. Even though we were in night-dark shadows, I could see him easily. Could see his silky, damp hair and knew from its enticing waves that he’d merely finger-combed the long strands back from his face. Could see his untucked chambray shirt stretched across the breadth of his powerful shoulders. See how his faded jeans encased his lean thighs and see that he was barefoot. It seemed impossible to me that even his damn feet looked good and I sighed with impatience at my inexplicably attentive libido.

Cheeks flaming, I wrenched my eyes away and wondered just how good his night-vision was. When his dark gaze traveled across my face and his eyes glinted—with amusement or with irritation, I couldn’t tell—I had my humiliating answer.

Koda’s hands fisted at his sides and he growled something to himself. Moving a few feet away, he leaned his elbows on the waist-high stone wall encircling the patio. I could only guess my blatantly checking him out made him want the distance between us.

Without looking at me, he said, “Teach me some of your words.”

I startled. “You want to learn Fae?”

He shrugged one shoulder and leaned his hip against the wall. “A few phrases might be useful.”

I thought about this, hesitating. Then I got it and smiled bitterly. “Ahh. Know the enemy.”

He crossed his arms over his chest and a muscle leapt in his jaw, but he didn’t respond.

Curiously stung, I said in a soft voice, “That’s how you see me.”

A tense moment passed before he swung his head toward me, but I couldn’t identify the emotion in his shadowy eyes. “Sephti, your kind—”

“Yeah, I know. We carry the stench of fae.” Pinching the bridge of my nose, I struggled against a rising tide of caustic fury. “Among many other loathsome characteristics, thanks to the bastards’ appalling decision to call bitterns into hellish being.”

Koda’s face went pale as he studied me. “You hate your existence so much?”

“You’ve no idea,” I hissed, fighting off the rage and despair.

“Sephti,” he whispered. “All life is sacred, no matter how it came to be.”

I made myself breathe slowly, forcing air in and out of my lungs as I wrestled for calm. “You believe that?”

“I do.” His voice rang with certainty.

I was so damn weary of my unending internal battle. “I envy you then.”

Koda drew a sharp breath and came to sit beside me, our shoulders almost touching. It seemed he would speak but thought better of it and we sat in companionable silence for a little while.

“What’s your word for flower?” he asked, his deep voice blending with the night in a way that sent shivers across my skin.

Wrapping my arms around myself, I cleared my throat and worked to speak levelly. “
Siafnir.
”

He whispered the word to himself. Tilting his head back, he looked at the stars overhead. “Night sky?”

My tone was biting. “How do such words help in dealing with your enemy?”

Koda didn’t look away from his contemplation of the moon. “They don’t, but that is not why I asked.”

“No?”

“No.”

I couldn’t help it. “So…why?”

He shot me a triumphant look, like he’d been waiting for the question. “Seek first to understand.”

“What is that, Confucius?” I huffed.

“St. Francis. It’s from the Bible.”

“You’re quoting the Bible. To a bittern.” I barked a laugh. “According to our masters, we don’t possess a soul.”

“According to your
former
masters, my people have no right to the air we breathe.” He shrugged, unaffected. “So why would anyone believe the
itiq?
”

I went still. “Are you saying…” I was curiously conscious of the air passing in and out of my lungs. “You can’t mean what I think you’re saying. Not after having witnessed a bittern frenzy.”

“That’s what has you white as a sheet and shaking?”

I glared at him, unspeaking.

The lines of his face gentled. “Haven’t you wondered why our fight ended? Why I bore no more injuries than the few you saw?” He gave me a sidelong glance. “You’re a formidable fighter, Sephti. And smart. But you didn’t wonder?”

Cheeks flushing, I squirmed under his gaze. No way was I going to admit my humiliating assumption that he was more skilled.

He lifted a brow at my obstinate silence. “The reason the fight and your frenzy ended is because you stopped it.”

My breath caught in my throat. “That’s not possible. The frenzy had me.”

“It is the truth. You reacted emphatically to aggression, but when I backed off, you instantly disengaged.” He considered me from the corner of his eye. “Would someone driven by animalistic impulses do that? I don’t believe so.”

“But the frenzies—”

He shrugged again. “So you’re DNA challenged. Doesn’t mean it governs you.”

I had to laugh. “DNA challenged?”

Koda just smiled.

Wonderingly, I thought about what he’d said. “You think…do you think I have a soul?”

He bent his head to meet my gaze. “I look in your eyes and see your soul shining out. I touch your skin and feel your soul’s fire. Yes, Sephti, of course you have a soul. How could you think otherwise?”

My heart thudding in my chest, I felt a grin stretch my lips. I wasn’t sure if he was right, but it felt so damn good to hear it.

“Would you do me a favor, though?” he asked, rubbing his eyes.

I nodded, breathless at the joy he’d awakened.