King of Campus (19 page)

“I don’t think I’m delusional at all.  That kiss was pretty damn fantastic.”  He tilts his head to the side before murmuring, “Don’t you want to find out if it was just as good as you remember it being?”

Someone needs to slap me silly right now because yeah… I kind of do want to find that out.  It was a completely spectacular kiss and I’m seriously hoping that I’ve built up the whole thing in my head.  Because if I haven’t… well, then… Roan King is the best kiss I’ve ever had.

And that would just be all kinds of depressing.

Not that I’ll be mentioning this to Roan, but I did let Finn kiss me on Saturday night and it was decidedly lacking.  Needless to say, it isn’t Finn’s kiss I’ve been fantasizing about for the past couple days.

With my eyes on his, I nip my bottom lip between my teeth.  “Ummm, I don’t know.”

God knows I would dearly love to kiss him again but I’m clinging to the knowledge that it’s a bad idea.  Make that a disastrous idea.

He leans just a bit closer until I can feel his warm minty breath feather lightly across my lips.  Until the scent of him feels nothing short of intoxicating.  “It’s just one little kiss, Ivy.”

Just a kiss…

That is true.  It would be
just
a kiss.  Because we are definitely not going any further than that.

Now I’m practically gnawing on my lower lip with indecision. His eyes drop to my mouth before he groans.  I hear it rumble from deep within his chest before escaping through his slightly parted lips.  This might be the only way to prove to myself that I’ve simply built up that kiss in my head.  If it turns out to be nothing special, then I can stop thinking about him and move on.

“Okay,” I quickly agree before good sense returns and I chicken out.

I’m barely able to breathe out the word before his lips are siding across mine, caressing them with soft yet sure strokes.  Without a second thought, I wind my arms around his neck before dragging his body closer.  The growl-like sound he makes in approval fills my ears.  His lips never leave mine for long.  They may slant this way or that way before nipping at my bottom lip, but they’re constantly roving over mine.

I don’t know how long we stay fused together, just stroking each other’s mouths before his tongue slips inside mine.  He caresses the inside of my mouth with long deep strokes that almost drive me to the brink of insanity.  So drunk on the taste of him, I don’t even realize that I’m straddling his lap, grinding myself against him.

Although, to be fair, he’s thrusting himself against me as well.

And if what I’m feeling is a true indication of what lies beneath those jeans, then he’s huge.

But I have no plans to find that out firsthand.

And yet, knowing there is never going to be anything meaningful between us, here I am practically dry humping him in my bedroom.  Actually there’s no
practically
about it.  I
am
dry humping the guy all the while playing an intense game of tonsil hockey.

Slowly I fight my way out of the thick fog that has settled over me with the very first slide of his lips against mine.  Oh, who am I kidding, I was a goner when he pulled me onto his lap and wrapped those huge bulging arms around me.

This was just plain stupid.

And I’m an idiot for allowing it to happen.

Again
.

Slowly I unravel my arms from around his neck before using my palms to reluctantly push against that big broad chest of his.  And yeah, he’s as solid as a damn rock.  The athlete in me can totally appreciate the beauty of all that well-honed muscle.  It’s obvious he spends hours in the gym working out and training on the field.  He’s definitely one hell of a beautiful specimen.

Not understanding why I’m suddenly pushing away from him, his hazy blue-green eyes slowly lift to mine.  It’s a small consolation that I’m not the only one who seems to be affected by that kiss.  Gradually his eyes clear as they hold mine before sinking to my mouth. Slowly he licks his lips as if he’s seconds away from diving in for more.

And yeah, I want that just as much as I think he does.  But… that doesn’t necessarily feel like the best idea right now.  Or probably ever.

At the end of the day, he’s still Roan King.  Resident football god here at Barnett.  Future NFL prospect.  Totally gorgeous man.  And he’s smart, too.  That’s clear from the little bit of research we’ve done together.  He sounds almost too good to be true.

But that’s the thing.

He is.

Because Roan isn’t interested in being tied down to one girl.  He’s into hooking up for the night and moving on without so much as a second thought.  I almost laugh as I search those heated turquoise eyes of his. Stunning.  They are totally mesmerizing in their depth and intensity.  I completely understand why he has inspired legions of women at Barnett to trail after him.  To cyberstalk him. 

Who wouldn’t want to tame a guy like that?

Even I, a girl who considers herself above all that BS, feel slightly tempted to try my hand at it.  But that’s where the logical side of my brain kicks in because I know all too well that trying to bring a guy like Roan to heal rarely works.

Instead, I’ll be the one left nursing a broken heart and I’m not really willing to take a chance like that.  Finn hurt me enough when I left for my study abroad program.  And it’s more than obvious that Finn and Roan are cut from the same cloth.  Which is probably why they don’t seem to like one another.   So, as tempted as I am to take this attraction further, I know exactly how it will end.

And that’s badly.

For me.

Without any words between us, I slowly tear myself out of his arms before climbing unsteadily to my feet.  Even though my heart is racing and my breathing hasn’t quite evened out, I know I’m doing the smart thing.  I can’t do a hook up situation which is the only thing Roan is capable of right now.  And that’s fine.  I’m not judging him for it.  I’m just not interested in being a one night stand.

“Ivy?”

His eyes have cleared but he hasn’t moved from where he’s sitting on my bed.

Wrapping my arms around my middle, I finally say in a voice that sounds surprisingly husky, “I think you should probably leave now.”

Something snaps in his eyes before he slowly rises to his feet.  Our eyes lock and hold as he deliberately moves towards me.  My breath catches because if he takes me into his arms again, I honestly don’t know if I’ll be able to push him away.  It feels as if it took everything I had inside to do it the first time.  When our faces aren’t more than a scant inch apart, I feel his lips ghost over mine and my breath catches in my throat. 

“Admit it, Ivy, it was a damn good kiss.”

Oh, there’s definitely no question about it.  And I would look like a huge liar if I even tried to say differently.

“It was,” I agree softly.

Looking slightly surprised by my easy capitulation, his eyes fall to my lips.  “Don’t you want more?”

The husky cadence of his voice has me biting down on my lower lip in an attempt to stifle the small whimper that is trying almost desperately to escape.

Because yeah, I do…

“Yes,” I finally admit.

Something hot flashes within those gorgeous eyes of his.

“So do I,” he pauses before saying in a gravelly voice that sounds as if it’s been roughed up with sandpaper, “and I want more than just your mouth.”

Pulling away, one hand rises so the pad of his thumb can gently caress my lower lip.  His heated gaze is fixated on the leisure movement of his finger. I feel as if I’m being burned alive by the fire in his eyes.

Then his hand simply falls away.  I can’t help but suck in a ragged breath hoping that maybe he’ll finally put a little distance between us and allow me some breathing room to collect my scattered thoughts, but he doesn’t.  Instead, he wraps a large hand around the back of my neck before spreading his fingers wide and bringing my head forward until his lips are fused to mine.

If I were smart, I would step away from him, but I don’t.  Oh no.  I’m practically melting in his arms as his lips rove over mine before his tongue once again slips inside my mouth.  That soft little mewling noise I was trying so very hard not to make, finally escapes.  This only spurs him on because his mouth moves with more intensity as he deepens the kiss.

My fingers are just curling into the soft material of his t-shirt when he finally draws away from me.  His heavy lidded eyes hold mine for just a moment before he whispers thickly, “I’ll be seeing you, Ivy.”

Releasing me, he walks out of my room without a backwards glance.  I hear a few murmured words exchanged between Dylan, Lexie and him before the front door opens and closes.  Then I do the only thing I can- I sink to my knees on the carpeted floor wondering how in the hell I’m going to avoid what would most likely be the hottest sex of my life.

Chapter Fifteen

There are parties going on, but no Roan King. He’s been inconspicuously absent from all the festivities.  I’m starting to have withdrawals.  Does anyone know where RK has been hiding himself?  Update ASAP!  KingOfCampus.com

“So, are you going to tell me what the deal is with your family?”  He slants a look in my direction before his eyes arrow back to the road in front of him.

Yeah… I probably should.  I mean, in less than an hour, we’re going to be there.  It’s just that… well, I’m feeling sort of conflicted.  Not about my family, but about Roan.  The guy has totally knocked me off balance.  After sharing that totally hot kiss Monday night, I was prepared for him to come at me hard.  It’s not exactly a secret that he wants to sleep with me.

But he hasn’t.

Like at all.

Here’s the bad part- I don’t know if I’m relieved or disappointed by his lack of pursuit.  I have the sneaking suspicion that it’s not relief coursing through me.

Sure, I saw him in class on both Wednesday and Friday.  And we spoke briefly.  We worked together at the library on Tuesday night and then again on Friday afternoon.  Our project on Bernie Madoff and his Ponzi scheme is coming along quite nicely. The more research I pour over, the worse I feel for all those people who were scammed out of their life savings.  Some of them lost everything they had, all of their retirement money.

And for what?

Greed.

Sheer greed.

It makes me sick inside to think about it.

Both times we studied together, he was a perfect gentleman.  Or friend.  Because I guess, rather surprisingly, that’s kind of what we are now.  It’s like those two kisses never even happened.

So, yeah, I guess it should be relief coursing through me.

But it’s not…

“Ivy?”

“What?”  With a light blush tinging my cheeks, I blink back to the present and the question he just asked.  “Oh… my family.  Right…”  Taking a deep breath, I waffle for a minute or two before deciding to fill him in.  Everything within me instantly feels weighted down thinking about my mom and what happened after she died.  Honestly, I’d had every intention of cancelling today.  Simply telling my dad that something came up with Roan and he wouldn’t be able to drive me to their house.

But…

I actually think having him there today will be something of a distraction.  For all of us.  Because I’ve seen firsthand how people react to him, how they gravitate towards him.  So… maybe I’m using him to ease the tension I know will be there between me and my family.  And if not today, it would have happened sooner or later.  Even I realize I can’t keep pushing it off indefinitely.

I have little doubt that Roan will end up regretting his little burst of altruism by the end of the day.  Which kind of makes me want to snicker.  He totally deserves it for shoving his nose where it didn’t belong.

“I’ll give you the condensed version.”

I have to take another deep breath because it’s actually quite hard discussing my mom with anyone.  Even though she’s been gone for five years, fresh waves of grief still roll through me when I think about her.  Which is why I usually avoid talking about her.  It’s just too painful and honestly, other than Lexie, there’s no one else I feel comfortable unloading on.  My mom’s parents are both dead and my dad has apparently closed that chapter of his life and moved on.

With unseeing eyes, I stare down at my fingers which lay twisting nervously in my lap.  It’s not until Roan reaches out, slipping my hand into his that I even remember he’s sitting next to me.

“You don’t have to tell me, if you don’t want to.”  He gives me a gentle squeeze.

Those must be the magic words because once the floodgates open, they don’t close until I’ve purged myself of everything.  When I’m finally finished, I steal another glance at him to see the expression on his face.

He must sense my curious gaze because his fingers tighten around mine before he clears his throat.  “That really sucks, Ivy.  I’m sorry I forced you into this.”

A little bit of laughter gurgles up in my throat.  “Well, you’re lucky I didn’t kill you with my bare hands Monday night.”

A small smile tugs his lips upward.  “I would have killed me, too.  You showed incredible restraint.”