Kiss an Angel (16 page)

Alex's boots thudded on the ramp. "Stop it, Daisy, and get out here."

She swallowed hard against the constriction in her throat. "Go away."

"You're not going to survive here. Your stubbornness is only postponing the inevitable."

"You're probably right." She lost the battle to hold back her tears. They spilled over onto her cheeks.

She sniffed, but she didn't stop working.

"The only thing you're proving to me is how foolish you are."

"I'm not trying to prove anything to you, and I really don't want to talk any longer." With a shuddering sob, she lifted another heavy pile and barely found the strength to haul it to the wheelbarrow.

"Are you crying?"

"Go away."

He stepped inside and came around in front of her. "You are. You're crying."

Her voice quivered. "Excuse me, but you're in my way."

He reached for the shovel, but she snatched it away before he could touch it. A burst of anger-fueled adrenaline gave her the strength to shove the blade under another pile, scoop it up, and thrust it out at him. "Go away! I mean it, Alex! If you don't leave me alone, you're going to be wearing this."

"You wouldn't dare."

Her arms trembled and tears dripped from her chin onto her T-shirt, but she met his gaze without flinching. "You shouldn't dare a person who doesn't have anything left to lose."

For a moment he did nothing. Then he slowly shook his head and backed away.

"Have it your way, but you're only making this harder on yourself."

It took her two hours to clean the trailer. Maneuvering the heavy wheelbarrow down the ramp was the most difficult. On the first trip, it tipped, and she had to clean up the mess all over again. She'd cried the whole time, but she didn't stop.

Occasionally, she looked up and saw Alex pass by, his golden eyes watchful, but she ignored him. The pain in her arms and shoulders grew unbearable, but she gritted her teeth and somehow forced herself to go on.

When she had finished hosing down the interior, she stood in the doorway. The jeans and T-shirt Alex had bought her two days earlier were crusted with filth, as was every other part of her. Hair straggled around her face, and her fingernails were broken. She surveyed her work and tried to feel some sense of pride in her accomplishment, but all she felt was exhaustion.

She sagged against the truck's loading door. From her vantage point at the top of the ramp, she could see the adult elephants chained near the road to advertise the circus to those driving by.

"Come on down here, Miz," Digger said. "Day's not over."

She limped to the bottom of the ramp, keeping a wary eye on the young elephants milling untethered not ten yards away.

He gestured toward them. "The babies got to be watered. Use this bull hook to move 'em over to the trough." He indicated a pole several feet long with a hook at the end, then walked over to the baby elephants, each of whom had to weigh close to a ton. With a combination of voice commands and light raps from the bull hook, he got them moving toward a galvanized tank filled with water.

Daisy stayed as far away as possible, her heart pounding with fear.

He looked back at her. "You're not gonna git the job done from way over there."

She moved forward gingerly, telling herself that, despite their size, they were only babies. At least they weren't nasty little dogs.

She watched as some of them used their mouths to sip directly from the trough while others sucked water partially up into their trunks, then carried their trunks to their mouths. Digger noticed the way she continued to hold back. "You ain't afraid of 'em are you, Miz?

"Call me Daisy."

"You cain't never let any animal see you're afraid."

"That's what people keep telling me."

"You got to show 'em who's boss. Show 'em you're in charge."

He slapped one animal, moving him to the side to make way for the others.

From her vantage point in

the bleachers, she'd found the babies cute with their floppy ears, long, curling lashes, and solemn expressions, but now they scared her to death.

She saw Neeco Martin over by the adult elephants—the bulls, she reminded herself, even though she'd been told they were all females. She winced as he gave one of them a strong whack with the bull hook. She might not be an animal lover, but something inside her twisted with revulsion. These elephants hadn't chosen to be in a circus, and she didn't think they should be brutalized because they didn't follow the rules humans set for them, especially when those rules ran counter to the instincts of their species.

"I got to help Neeco git the elephant ride set up," Digger said. "Take the babies back to the picket line.

I'll help you tether them in a few minutes."

"Oh, no! No, I don't think—"

"That one there's Puddin'. That's Tater. The one on the end is Pebbles and that there's Bam Bam. We just call him Bam for short. Git on now, Pebbles. You mind yer manners." He thrust the bull hook at Daisy and walked away.

Daisy gazed with dismay from the bull hook in her hand to the elephants. Bam opened his mouth, either to yawn or eat her, she wasn't sure which, and she jumped back. Two of the elephants dipped their trunks back in the watering trough.

Now she'd give up, she thought. She'd managed to shovel out that truck, but getting any closer to these elephants was beyond her abilities. She had reached the absolute limit of what she could do.

In the distance she saw Alex watching her, waiting like a vulture to pounce on her useless carcass and then throw her away.

She shuddered and took one hesitant step toward the baby elephants. "Uh—let's go, fellas." She tentatively pointed the bull hook toward the picket line.

Bam, or maybe it was Pebbles, raised his head and sneered at her.

She took an uneasy step closer. ''Please don't give me any trouble. It's been a terrible day."

Tater lifted his trunk from the trough and turned his head toward her. The next thing she knew, she received a spray of water right in her face.

"Oh!" With a gasp, she sprang back.

Tater lumbered away, heading not for the picket line but for the trailers.

"Come back!" she cried, wiping the water from her eyes. "Don't do that!

Please!"

Neeco rushed over holding a long metal rod with a U-shaped prong at one end.

He shoved it at Tater, choosing a point behind his ear. The elephant gave a loud, painful squeal, recoiled, and immediately turned toward the picket line.

The others quickly followed.

Daisy stared at the animals, then at Neeco. ' What did you do to him?"

He transferred the pole from his right hand to his left and brushed his long, dishwater blond hair back from his face. "This is a hot shot. It's a cattle prod. I don't use it unless I have to, but they know they're going to get zapped if they don't behave."

She stared at the hot shot in revulsion. "You shock them? Isn't that a little brutal?"

"You can't get sentimental about the animals. I love them, but I'm not stupid about them. They have to know who's in charge or people can get hurt."

"I'm not going to be good at this, Neeco. I've told everyone that I'm afraid of animals, but no one seems to be listening."

"You'll get over it. You just need to spend some time with them. They don't like sudden noises or people sneaking up on them, so come at them from the front." He pulled the bull hook from her hand and gave her the hot shot. "If they see you carrying this, they'll give you some respect. The babies are easy to control; a couple of quick zaps, and you've got their attention. When you're using the bull hook, get

them behind the ears. They've got big nerve centers there."

She felt as if she had been forced to take hold of something obscene. She glanced over at the baby elephants and saw Tater gazing back at her. He seemed to be taking in the hot shot, and although it was probably her imagination, she thought he looked disappointed.

As Neeco walked away, she approached the babies, giving a series of coughs so she wouldn't take them by surprise. They lifted their heads and shuffled uneasily as they saw what she carried. Bam opened his mouth and emitted a loud, unhappy bellow.

They must be accustomed to being brought in line with shocks, and she found herself disliking Neeco Martin. The hot shot sickened her instead of increasing her confidence. No matter how frightened she was of the animals, she would never be able to hurt them, and she discarded the hot shot behind a load of hay.

She looked longingly toward Alex's house trailer. Only three days ago, she had thought it ugly, but now it seemed the most welcoming spot in the world. She reminded herself that she had survived mucking out that truck. Certainly she could survive this.

Once again she approached them, this time without the cattle prod. For a moment they watched her. Apparently satisfied that she was no longer a threat, they returned to their happy grubbing in the dirt.

All of them but Tater. Was it her imagination or was he smiling? And did the smile have a faintly diabolical cast to it?

"Nice elephants. N-nice babies," she crooned. "And nice Daisy. Very, very nice Daisy."

Pebbles and Bam Bam lifted their heads to look at each other, and she could have sworn they rolled their eyes in disgust. Tater, in the meantime, lifted a clump of hay and dropped it on his back. The other babies continued to watch her, but Tater no longer seemed to be bothered by her presence, making him the most approachable of the quartet.

He dusted his back with another clump of hay. She sidled closer by a few steps until barely ten feet separated them. He began snuffling in the dirt.

"Nice Tater. Tater's a nice baby elephant." She crept forward another few inches, speaking to him as if

he were a human baby. "Pretty boy. Good manners." Her voice had begun to shake. "Tater has such

fine manners." She was almost near enough to pat his trunk, and her skin was clammy with perspiration. "Tater likes Daisy. Daisy's Tater's friend." She slowly extended her hand, moving it forward inch by inch, telling herself that elephants didn't eat humans, that everything—-

Swat!

The baby elephant's trunk caught her across the chest and sent her flying to the ground. She landed so hard that she saw stars. Pain ricocheted through her left side. Her vision cleared just in time for her to observe a small, contented elephant lift his trunk and emit a youthful, and unmistakably victorious, trumpet.

She sat there, too dispirited to get to her feet. Lavender sandals studded with small silver stars appeared

in her vision. She raised her head and saw Bathsheba Quest staring down at her through a pair of dark glasses. Sheba wore a stretchy white top and low-slung white shorts cinched at the waist with a lavender belt. Perched on her hip was a dark-haired toddler, a child Daisy remembered having seen with one of the Tolea brothers and his wife. Sheba stared down at her, then slipped her sunglasses to the top of her head, pulling back her hair far enough to reveal enormous star-shaped purple rhinestone earrings.

Daisy expected to see triumph in Sheba's eyes, but instead she merely saw satisfaction, and she realized she had sunk so low that Sheba no longer even regarded her as a threat.

"Where in the hell did Alex find you?"

Shaking her head, Sheba stepped over Daisy's feet, walked up to Tater, and petted his trunk. "You're a little stinker, aren't you, fella? Isn't he, Theo?" She tweaked the toddler's foot.

Daisy had been bested on every front, and she couldn't take any more. As far as she was concerned, her work was done for the day, and she'd survived, if only barely. She dragged herself to her feet and began walking to the trailer only to see Alex going inside. Unwilling to face another encounter with him, she turned away and began aimlessly wandering through the circus grounds.

Two of the showgirls noticed her coming and turned away. One of the clowns pretended not to see her. She desperately wanted a cigarette.

She jumped as a terrible shrieking split the air. Her head shot up, and she saw Frankie near one of the trucks holding Jill's hand. He pointed at her and screeched. Jill picked him up and, without so much as a word, walked away.

Daisy felt sick inside. The message was clear. She had been declared an outcast.

She walked aimlessly until she found herself at the menagerie tent. The side flap was raised, and all the animals seemed to be inside with the exception of Sinjun, whose cage still sat in the sun. The animal pricked up its ears as she approached and regarded her with disdain. It had been too dark last night for her to see the condition of his cage, but now she noticed that it was filthy.

Digger, she'd learned, was supposed to take care of the menagerie, but it must be low on his priority list.

Once again the tiger locked eyes with her and once again she couldn't look away. Last night the tiger's

fur had seemed to gleam in the floodlights, but now it looked dull and unhealthy. She stared into those mysterious gold irises, and as the seconds ticked by, she felt herself growing unbearably hot.

Sweat pooled under her arms and gathered in the hollow of her throat. Her face became flushed, her breasts wet. She had never been so hot. She wanted to tear her clothes off and plunge into a pool of ice-cold water. She was burning up, and somehow she knew the heat wasn't coming from her but from the tiger.

"There you are."

She snapped her head around to see Alex approaching. He took her in from head to toe, and beneath the impact of those cool, impersonal eyes, her body grew chill.

"You have some free time before you need to get ready for spec," he said.

"Why don't you clean up,

and then we'll see about an early dinner?'

"Spec?"

"I told you it was part of your job."

"But not tonight. I can't possibly do it tonight. Look at me!"

As Alex watched her, he almost relented. Every bit of decency inside him demanded that he leave her alone. She was pale with exhaustion and so filthy she was almost unrecognizable. The only cosmetic still visible on her face was a smear of old mascara below her bottom lashes. Her soft little mouth drooped at the corners, and he didn't think he'd ever seen anyone so clearly at the end of her tether.