Kisses and Revenge (8 page)

"Baby, I just don't know what to do without you. You are my everything, and now you are gone. How am I supposed to face this life alone like this? I'm losing everyone and everything, and part of me doesn't care. Part of me hopes I will push them so far away that they won't bother to check on me, and then I can join you. I miss you, Adam. I miss you more than I ever thought I would."

Chapter Eleven

Tension built heavy between her legs, and her breath began to deepen as she felt the gentle teasing of a tongue against her clit. Her eyes slowly began to open, and she looked down to see Adam there, licking and sucking on her with such devotion and vigor. Her eyes widened, and she began to pull away, confusion hitting her.

"Adam, what are you doing here? Is it really you?" she asked, her voice coming out a bit higher and breathy than she had intended.

"Of course, it is me. Were you expecting someone else to make love to you?" he asked with that wicked grin on his face. Leslie couldn't believe it. Had all of the past couple of weeks been a nightmare?

Relaxing back into the bed, she arched her back as Adam gripped her hips and began to feverishly feed from the center of her body. He ravished her with tongue and teeth, hitting each and every spot of her that would make her body sing with delight. He gripped tightly to her hip, bringing her higher and higher until her body was writhing, and she began to scream out for him.

He rolled his eyes up to her, watching her as he continued working her through the first orgasm and into another one. His fingers moved from her hip to play with the opening of her body. The moment she began to come for him again, he plunged his fingers deep inside of her pumping them with speed and force. Leslie found herself arching back and grinding herself against her man. She had missed him so much, and her body was throbbing with the need to have more of him.

"I have missed you. You have no idea how much I have missed you, how much I have needed you. Please don't ever leave me again." Leslie's voice came out in strained pants as her hips bucked against his movement.

Adam moved up her body, kissing and licking as he did so. His fingers never stopped their skillful play of her body as he made his way to kiss her. When their lips met, it was like an explosion surged between them, and they were fiercely feeding from each other's mouths. It was the kind of kiss that both hurt and felt incredible, all at once, and it was far more than anything Leslie could have ever dreamed of. He kissed her mouth like he fucked her pussy, making her hotter and wetter, ready for him to invade her body.

When she began to tighten again for her next release, Adam moved his hand and plunged his cock deep inside of her, making her scream out for him. Her body arched elegantly as they moved hard and fast together. "You are my forever girl. I will always love you, Leslie," Adam whispered against her lips as he continued his intense taking of her body.

She turned her head to look up into his eyes and gasped as blood tears began to flow from the corners. Pushing at him, she saw those droplets turn to rivers of blood. Fear rose higher in her, and she screamed out. Adam's body became enveloped by blood which flooded over her body and coated the bed. Thick red crimson was everywhere, and she pushed at it, trying to get it off her body. Her hysterical screams filled the room, over and over, until she was sure she would lose her voice.

Sitting straight up in the bed with one final cry of horror, Leslie looked around to find it had all been a dream. She was still nestled in the guest room bed with a blanket around her. A warm surge tingled between her legs, and when she pulled the covers back, she saw her period had started. Her last hope of having something of Adam's to hold on to was gone, and she fell into another bout of tears. Curling in on herself, she held her knees to her chest, shaking and crying, not even caring she was still lying in the bed bleeding.

Giving herself time to grieve what remained of her hope, she then managed to calm herself enough to get out of bed and shower. Once clean and taken care of, she stripped and cleaned the bed before going to start a pot of coffee. She had only managed to sleep a couple of hours before her nightmare had awakened her, but she was sure her thoughts would not allow her to rest again. No, she was awake for another long stretch of time until exhaustion decided to knock her out.

Moving to the back patio, she sat in one of the cushioned chairs with her legs drawn up so she could rest her head on her knees. Her brown hair flowed like a curtain around her face, and she looked up at the sky, watching speckles of color stream across it. The sun was rising on yet another day. A day Adam would not ever see. It was too much, but she was starting to see that she was going crazy. Maybe Warren had been right. Maybe she needed a little more help than she had thought.

***

Hours had passed before Leslie moved from the back patio, her cold coffee still resting between her fingers. The fog she had been in since her dream had cleared some, and she realized she owed Warren a huge apology. He had only been trying to help her, and she had shoved him away like he didn't matter. It had not been fair, and more than that, he had been right. She did need help, and if he could help her, she would do everything she could to get that from him.

Finding her phone on the kitchen counter, she pressed the button to turn it on and saw she had a few missed messages. They didn't matter much to her, so she swiped them away and dialed Warren. Her heart raced with worry she would upset him further, but she had to try to apologize.

Just when she thought he was not going to answer and it would click over to voice mail, he picked up. "Hey, I didn't expect to hear from you today. I figured you were upset with me."

A sigh of relief washed over her, and she leaned back against the counter. "I'm not upset with you. I'm just not all myself. I shouldn't have talked to you that way last night."

"You don't have to apologize. I get it, but I also know that you need some help. I don't want you to draw in on yourself and not be able to find happiness again. You are so young, and what happened was awful, but you can't let it destroy you," Warren answered. She could hear shuffling on the other end of the phone and wondered if she had interrupted him at work.

"I don't deserve you being so nice to me. I have been nothing but selfish and pushed you away." She said, and then sighed. "Look, I was wondering if I could get the number to that counselor you suggested. You were right, I need some help, and I am not going to get it by sitting around here. I just ..."

"Leslie, please don't cry. I know, you miss him. How about this? I will come over after work, and I can help you get an appointment set up. I will even go with you and hold your hand if you want me to. You just go and get cleaned up and try to eat something, even if it is just a piece of bread. I will see you in a couple of hours." Warren sounded so strong and sure of himself. Leslie couldn't help but wonder how it was possible for him to be so calm about all of this.

"Thank you, Warren. Maybe after the appointment we can go to dinner or something. I need to heal, and maybe if I get around other people it will help. I will see you this afternoon. Don't work too hard." Leslie felt her stomach churn at the idea of food, but the hint of a smile curled on her lips.

"I never do, sweetheart. I never do." Warren hung up the phone.

Crushing silence consumed her the moment he was gone, and Leslie realized that being alone was the part that hurt her the most. She could almost feel normal when she was with him, or anyone, but when she was alone, she was surrounded by ghosts, and she could not seem to fight them away. Desperate to not be alone, Leslie fumbled with her phone until she found Sharron's number. Sharron was another person she had pushed away from during this hard time. She wouldn't blame her if Sharron didn't want to talk to her, but she had to try.

Dialing her up, Leslie paced around the kitchen until she heard the sound of her friend answering the phone. "Hey, Sharron, ummm, I was wondering if maybe you and I could get together today. I just ... I know I haven't been the best person to be around, but this being alone is starting to really get to me."

On the other end of the phone, she heard Sharron sigh deeply. "Leslie, I have been hoping you would call me. I want to be there for you, but I can't if you keep pushing me away. I love you, Leslie."

Leslie could feel her friend's words down in her soul, and it made her want to cry. She hadn't meant to alienate the people who cared about her. Grief had simply made her where she could not function like she once had. Normalcy was something she desperately needed. Tears filling her eyes once more, she wondered if her eyes would ever dry. "I know, I'm sorry I have been doing that. I hadn't meant to. I just don't know how to handle this. Sharron, I got my period today. I have nothing."

"Oh, honey! I know how badly you wanted to have a baby. I'm so sorry. Look, give me a few minutes to wrap things up here at work, and I will head over. I should be there in half an hour." The concern in Sharron's voice was strangely comforting. In that moment, Leslie knew just how much she needed her friend.

"That sounds perfect. I will try to pull myself together before you get here," Leslie sighed, glad to know she would not be spending yet another day alone with her thoughts.

"You don't have to pull yourself together for me. I'm your friend. I love you when you are all together, and I love you when you are falling apart. That is part of what being good friends is. Now, I will see you shortly," Sharron said just before hanging up.

More crushing silence, but Leslie figured thirty minutes wouldn't be hard to fill. She had some things she could do around the house to keep her mind from drifting. Remembering the bed, she went to the washer to put the bedding in the dryer. She had already cleaned the mattress and went to open the window to get the smell of bleach out of the room.

Closing the door to keep from having to smell the thick stench of bleach, Leslie then went to wash her hands before braving going into her own room. The night before she had pulled down a lot of Adam's clothes and figured she should do something with them. Part of her was not ready to pack Adam's things away, but she couldn't let them lay wrinkled on the floor either. Slowly she picked up each piece and put it back on a hanger. Her hands shook with each move she made, but it was for the best. One day she would pack them all away. One day she would move on.

She had just finished hanging the last of the clothes when she heard the sound of her doorbell. Grateful for the reprieve, she raced to the front of the house so she could welcome Sharron in. With a squeal of delight mixed with the choking of a cry, Leslie wrapped her arms around her best friend and collapsed into her arms. Sharron held her and petted her back. Soft shushing noises whispered into Leslie's ear, and she felt comforted by them.

When they finally broke apart, Leslie walked with Sharron into the kitchen. "Have you been cleaning?" Sharron asked, her nose wrinkling up from the smell of bleach.

"Oh, yeah, well, I woke up bleeding so I wanted to get the mattress clean. Sorry about the smell," Leslie answered, a light blush rising on her cheeks.

"It's fine. I'm glad to see you are doing something other than lying in bed crying all the time. I know it's hard, but you have to get up and do things. There is no way you will move past it by wallowing in it." Sharron moved over to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of Moscato Leslie had been saving. Sharron always knew the best way to get her relaxed.

"That is what Warren says too. He is going to help me get an appointment with a doctor so I can start working past all of this. I'm tired of being such a wreck. I miss Adam so much, though." She felt herself starting to cry again but fought it. Tears would do her no good.

"I get that. You should miss him. He was your husband, and the two of you were very much in love, but he is gone, and he wouldn't want to see you like this. He would want you to be happy," Sharron explained, grabbing two crystal glasses and filling them with the wine.

The two of them moved over to the table and took a seat. Leslie spun the glass between her fingers for a moment, watching the liquid slosh around in it. Then she lifted it and took a drink. The heat of the alcohol shot through her, and she felt a little more relaxed with every stip.

"I'm glad Warren is coming over and looking in on you. He surprises me with how much he has been doing for you, but some of it could be because he never got over the fact he is in love with you." Sharron grinned at those words, knowing it was a bit of a touchy subject.

"Warren is not still in love with me. That is just ridiculous. Besides, he has told me he likes to go from woman to woman. I'm sure he has lovely ladies all over him all the time." Leslie giggled a bit, but the idea of still being seen as desirable, even with how much of a mess she has been lately, was exciting.

"You are so blind. That guy has been in love with you from day one. He may fuck around, but that just means he isn't putting the effort into finding someone permanent. He is waiting for you to come around. Warren loves you. Always has, always will, and there is nothing you can do about it. So just get over it. Don't push him away either. He needs you, too." Sharron teased, filling their glasses once more.

"I'm trying hard not to push anyone away. Warren comes over every day, but I don't think he is in love with me. I think he just worries about me and wants to take care of me since Adam can't anymore," Leslie protested, giggling a bit as she went back to drinking her wine.

"You keep telling yourself that. I'm serious. Warren is in love with you, and there is no stopping it. So don't do something stupid, because if you keep pushing him away, he may just decide not to keep coming around. Not to mention, he is a handsome guy." Sharron laughed as well.