Lady In Waiting (22 page)

Raising her
h
ips, she pushed her body down upon him, taking him hard inside of her. She closed her eyes and gasped at the slightly painful sensation of his length and girth filling her, stretching her. But the sting quickly subsided and only the warmth and fullness remained.

Callum kissed her lips as he settled himself firmly between her thighs. "Och, lass, ye'll be the end of me," he said in a low heavy breath as he nudged her gently, moving deeper into her wetness.

Jenny moaned aloud, her body throbbing pleasurably

167

around him as he began to thrust into her. He held his weight over her, his arm muscles rigid and hard, as he braced himself upon his hands, positioned on either side of her shoulders.

Following the valleys between the rises of his tensed muscles, she gripped his arms for support and raised her hips, meeting each of his slow, patient thrusts.

Callu
m
watched her, his dark eyes sparkling in the candlelight. His brow became damp with moisture, catching the hair that brushed there.

He was so beautiful. And he was hers.

At least for this nigh
t
—
a
night she could hold in her memories forever.

"I love you, Callum. I do," she barely whispered, for somehow it felt almost as though she were saying goodbye. But it was important that he knew that no matter what the future brought, that at this moment in time she loved him. Truly, deeply loved him.

And in her heart, she knew she forever would.

Then, as if her words of love had unleashed his self-control, Callum began to thrust faster into her, harder. With each push, a coil seemed to tighten within her core.

Jenny writhed with pleasure as the tension building within her grew more intense. She squeezed his arms and her nails bit into his hard muscle.

Something made her want to take him deeper, hold him within her, and so she wrapped her long legs around his hips, locking them with a cross of her ankles.

Callum groaned, and suddenly his eyes went wide. He tried to pull away from her, but Jenny tightened her legs around him preventing him from escape. She ground herself against him, tightening her own feminine

168

muscles, trying desperately to force the release lingering just outside her grasp.

An explosion of heat suddenly shot from her center through her body, and she cried out, arching her back and clinging to Callu
m
as her muscles convulsed around him.

"Oh, Jenny,
no."
Callum's eyes closed, and he released a long exhale.

Beneath her palms, she could feel heat break across the surface of his back and the muscles of his buttocks and back tense just before he collapsed atop her.

He lifted his head then and peered down at her. "Oh, Jenny, ye dinna ken what ye
'
ve done."

Feeling horribly embarrassed, she looked him directly into the eyes, so there was no question she understood his meaning. "I think I might."

Callum leaned to his side, and reached back to unlock Jenny's ankles. He pushed away and rolled to sit at the edge of the bed, shoving a shaky hand through his damp hair. "Nay, ye dinna."

Jenny leaned to her side and with the flat of her palm ran her hand gently down his back.

He pulled away. "Please. Dinna do that." He exhaled in one great gush. "What have I done? What the hell have I done?" she heard him murmur.

Tears began to collect in Jenny's eyes. She allowed herself to fall back against the pillow where she covered her face with her forearms.

They had shared something precious. Something wondrous. But he regretted it.

169

A
n
hour later, Jenny lay deathly still in the bed staring at the dwindling fire. Callu
m
still lay next to her, though he hadn't said a word to her in all that time. She had a plummeting feeling that he thought she'd sought to trap him into marriage.

But she hadn't.
Perdition,
had she thought about the consequences of what she was doing, she certainly wouldn't have done it.

She would have never purposely put herself in the exact position her mother had been i
n
—
b
eing with child and in love with a man who would never marry her.
Could
never marry her.

Oh, he might have consented to marry the grand Lady Genevieve, but he'd never wed Jenny Penny, the servant. And worse, a servant who secretly peddled tingle cream to his equals.

What had she gotten herself into?

Her eyes and nose tingled, making her sniffle.

"Jenny, come here, lass."

Jenny peered over her shoulder and saw that Callum, whom she had thought was asleep beside her, was propped on one elbow and was beckoning.

"I'm sorry. Ye didna know."

Jenny looked quizzically back at him. What did he mean? Of course she
knew.
She just didn't
think
!

"Come, lie down with me, and I'll try me best to explain."

Jenny hesitantly lowered her head to Callum's broad chest, and felt his arm come up around her. "If you are going to explain to me about monthly courses and how one conceives a child, you needn't bother."

Callum paused a moment before speaking again, and

170

she could imagine him raising a single dark eyebrow at her blunt words.

"Nay, there is more." She felt his muscles move as he swallowed deeply.

"Do ye know of Lord Lyon in Scotlan
d
—
k
now his function within the realm?"

"Well, of course I do." Jenny, who for some selfish reason could not seem to put aside her lady's guise, did her best to sound indignant. And she did know all about Lord Lyon, didn't she? Lady Viola had explained it all to her just the other day. "Your father was elected Lord Lyon."

Callu
m
shifted Jenny's head to his shoulder so he
.
could look at her. "How did ye know?"

Jenny looked up at him. She lifted her fingers and traced the whitened scar crossing his cheek. "You told me"—
J
enny lifted her hand and traced the scar on his chee
k
—
"this
came from the Lord Lyon signet ring."

"Aye." Callum brushed her hand from his scar. "Because, of
his ...
position,
the continuation of our family line was all important to him. All that mattered. And, with no other issue, the responsibility fer producing an hei
r
—
f
er continuing the Argyll lin
e
—
r
ested on me."

"Then why have you not married?" She tried to see his eyes. "I should think your father would have placed quite a lot of pressure on you to marry during his lifetime."

An odd, almost disconcerting smile lifted the corner of Callum's mouth. "He did indeed."

"But still you're a bachelor."

Callum sighed then. "After years of his abuse and l
o
athi
n'
, I
came to despise him. Came to hate everything

171

he stood fer. And I made a decision, to extinguish what was most important to him."

Jenny's eyes rounded as she realized his intent and she sat up in the bed.
"His line.
You want to end it!"

A slow smile slid over his lips. "Aye. When I die, the family title will die with me. There is no one else left."

Jenny sat very still and considered his cold plan.

"And I've been verra careful during my manhood to ensure I never sired an hei
r
—
t
he verra thing he most wanted."

Jenny gulped. "Until now."

Callu
m
nodded his head slowly.

"I'm sorry, Callum. I didn't mean ... I just wante
d
... to hold you close." La, she was thankful it was dim in the chamber, for otherwise he might see how red her cheeks had to b
e
—
f
or they were burning like a torch.

"I dinna blame ye, lass. 'Twas yer first time with a man, and ye didna know what ye were doin'."

Jenny chewed the inside of her bottom lip. Perhaps it was best that she not tell him of Annie's lessons in love.

She gazed up into his dark, serious eyes. He was pensive, and she knew there was more to come. More probably than she wanted to hear.

"
'
'Tis verra possible ye conceived this night."

She nodded. "
'
'Tis also possible I did not," she offered brightly. " 'Twas as you said, my first time, therefore the likelihood of my conceiving is abou
t
—"

"Even," Callum said matter-of-fact
l
y.

Jenny's spirits fell. "Oh." At the thought, uncon
sc
iously, she laid her hand protectively over her belly.

Callum placed his hand atop hers there. "If it comes t
o
pass that I have left ye with a bairn, ye've got nothing to fear. I will do right by ye."

172

Jenny turned her face toward him and girded herself for the truth she knew she must now reveal. But before she could speak, Callu
m
spoke again.

"I will provide a guid, clean, and safe place for ye and the bairn to live. And guineas each month, whatever ye require, so ye can continue to live in the fashion ye are accustomed."

Jenny didn't understand his talk. She cinched her brows and studied him. Why wouldn't he look at her while he was speaking?

Then it struck her as coldly as the ice atop the canal had. Jenny grew very still.

Wait a moment. Wait just one bloody moment.
He wasn't offering to marry her at all! He was offering to keep her as his mistress ... while making his own child
a
—
b
astard.

Well, that wasn't a fate she'd wish on any child, having carried that burden herself all the years of her life.

Callum
'
s gaze flicked across her face for just an instant, and she knew he saw the betrayal she felt in her eyes.

"I am sorry, but I canna marry ye, Jenny, even if ye carry me child even now. I canna give me bairn me name. I canna."

Fury welled up within Jenny. He thought he could do this, did he? Impregnate her, wel
l
... possibly, then set her aside like yesterday's stale bread?

Who did he think he was? She was a lady after all and deserved better.

Jenny opened her mouth to tell him so when he raised his hand to halt any protest from her.

And it was a good thing too. Jenny drew her lips into her mouth and held them there. For a moment, she had

173

almost forgotten that she
was
n
't
a lady, but rather a conniving, deceitful little maid who, after her grand lie, deserved whatever she got.

"Please, I must continue, lass."

Jenny closed her lids slowly, then opened them with deliberation and looked straight into Callum's eyes.

He took a shaky breath, then expelled his next words forcefully, as if trying to make himself remember them.

"The Argyll line
will
die with me," he vowed. "It must"

Chapter E
l
even

The next morning, Jenny wriggled into her uncomfortably stiff, puckered, and pitifully ruined walking ensemble. The fabric had reduced, and had she not expelled the breath completely from her lungs, it would have been impossible to fasten. But, being the lady's maid she was, Jenny was mindful of a few fitting tricks from the seamstresses she'd worked with over the years.

Silently she moved to the window and swept back the thick curtains to look out. Glancing back at the tester, she saw that Callu
m
still slept peacefully, having managed to say what he felt he must.

Jenny barely slept at all. When she did, she dreamed of walking through the Upper Assembly Rooms, her belly heavy with Callum'
s
child, as the
ton
collectively pointed, then turned their backs to her.

Nightmare or not, Jenny knew the dream might well be her future.

As she leaned her forehead against the cold window-pane, she looked out at the deep drifts of snow and at the lone track looping its way from house to house. Deliveries by foot. Callum had been right. No carriage or sedan chair was getting through the streets this day.