Lamb to the Slaughter (Serenity's Plain Secrets Book 1) (11 page)

Serenity paused, her lips pursed. She looked back at me and asked, “If you don’t want to tell me, I understand…but why exactly did you leave?”

I glanced at my watch, a luxury I didn’t have when I’d been a member of the Plain people. We’d arrived early, having just enough time for me to give Serenity a basic telling of the story. But, did I really want to?

“It’s okay. Really, I shouldn’t have pried into your personal life,” Serenity said, becoming all business-like again. I didn’t enjoy seeing the hardening of her features or the way that she now looked out the window at nothing in particular.

“I was like all the other Amish boys, occasionally getting into trouble, but nothing serious.” I had her gaze back on me and seeing her face open up again, I was happy to tell her the story. “When I was nineteen, I felt I’d sowed my wild oats. Even though there were many things about the lifestyle I didn’t agree with, like not driving cars or listening to music, I was lured in by a pretty Amish girl named Rosetta. The idea of having my own wife and family became very intriguing to me. In a rather short period of time, I was seriously courting Rosetta and planning a wedding.”

I paused, looking out the window at the cloud covered sky that hinted of snow in the near future. I remembered that the weather had been similar when all hell broke loose in my life years before. The day that I’d walked away from my Amish life and my family.

“The November that I turned nineteen, just a few months before I was to wed Rosetta, I began a job on a porch on a
house in town. I was working on my own while Father and Paul, one of my brothers, worked at another site. The driver would drop me off each day and then leave to taxi my father and Paul to their job. It was the first time that I’d been left entirely alone, and I remember distinctly the joy I’d felt from the solitude of not being constantly watched. Thinking back, if I hadn’t been alone, none of it probably would have even happened. But then, I would never have escaped either.

“There was a young woman named Abby who rented the house with several of her girlfriends. She would sit and chat with me the entire day on that porch, bringing me sandwiches and lemonade. I was immediately smitten with her carefree and out going manner. I found myself working extra fast so that I could quit early and spend time walking with the English girl in the park or grabbing a bite to eat at the Diner.”

I stopped and saw that Serenity was hanging on my every word. For a brief second, I wanted to end the story, worried about what she’d think of me once she knew. But the expression on her face told me there was no backing out now.

“Within days of meeting the young woman, I was being intimate with her—the first time for me. Maybe it was that she was my first or maybe deep down I didn’t want to be Amish. I don’t know, but the day I finished the porch, I went home to tell my parents that I’d fallen in love with an English girl and that I wasn’t going to marry Rosetta. I was leaving the Amish to be with her.”

I glanced at Serenity. She was pressed back into the seat with a thoughtful look on her face. When she spoke, her voice was soft and sweet. “What did your parents say?”

“Father went into a rage and Mother wouldn’t speak to me at all. As a matter of fact, she never spoke to me again after
that day. Father continued to shout at me the entire time I was packing a few personal belongings and walking out to Abby’s waiting car. I was immediately shunned by my family and the other members of the church.”

“What exactly does it mean to be shunned?” she asked with eyes wide.

“Different communities handle shunning in their own way, but for ours, it means that you aren’t welcome to have a meal with church members any longer, even family. Although parents will sometimes help a child out financially after they’ve been shunned, they will not receive aid in return. In most cases, as with mine, the parents don’t want to corrupt their other children with the rebellious one, so they’ll have little or no contact with the shunned child.”

“But your sister ate with you at the school house.” Serenity said.

“That was different. It was a community event to raise money. The rules are looser in such a situation. She wouldn’t invite me to her home for the holidays or her children’s birthdays.” I probably said it harsher than I should have, but those first few years on my own had been rough, especially for a young man who was used to the close company of a large family.

Serenity asked quietly, “What did Rosetta do?”

My chest tightened. Thinking about Rosetta was always difficult, but talking about her was even worse.

“From the gossip I’d received from Lester afterwards, she was torn up about it for a few months and then she began courting another Amish boy. She married a year later than our intended wedding date.” Seeing her lips begin to form words, I guessed what her question would be. “She moved to
Ohio with her husband a few years following their marriage. I haven’t seen her since.”

Timidly, Serenity asked, “What happened to Abby?”

I wasn’t expecting that question. It was the most difficult part to remember. But I’d told Serenity too much already not to finish the story.

“I’d say it was just a month after I’d moved into the house with her that I began pestering her to marry me. Marriage and a family wasn’t a goal for her. She had wild oats to sow and I’d become a hindrance to her freedom. One stormy night after I’d begged her not to go out with her friends, she told me she didn’t love me—that she’d never loved me.” I couldn’t keep the bitterness from my tone. “She said she was sorry for fucking up my life, but she wasn’t going to do the same to hers. Last I heard she was living in Indianapolis, working as a nurse in a big hospital. That was some ten years ago. I reckon she’s finally settled down herself by now.”

I stared at Serenity waiting for her to chastise me for being so stupid and impulsive. Instead, she asked, “Do you miss being Amish?”

“Some things I miss, like the sense of community and having people always there to pick you up when you fall. I miss my family. I wish I’d had the chance to know all my nephews and nieces. Now that my parents are getting older, I fear that they’ll pass away without us mending fences. But no, I don’t miss being Amish. I love my freedom too much now to ever give it up. It’s better to have a choice and make a mistake than to have no choice at all.”

“But you told the bishop that you were considering joining back up—”

I chuckled at her gullibility. The annoyed frown she shot my way amused me even more. “I knew that if I mentioned that I might be interested in going back, word would spread quickly. People would be more comfortable talking with us. It’s not as if I signed a contract in blood saying that I was growing a beard right away.”

Serenity was beginning to speak again when I spotted the Amish girl coming out of the building. I shushed her and nodded my head in the girl’s direction. Sandra made eye contact for only an instant before she made her way to the side where the corral was set up. It was then that I noticed the picnic table. What a shitty place to eat lunch, I thought.

Without a word, we slipped out of the Jeep and headed toward the table. I stepped up to the corral and leaned against it pretending to look at the two young cows within while Serenity sat down across from Sandra.

“I’m so glad you came. We have to talk quickly. I don’t want anyone getting suspicious. If they ask you inside why you stopped to talk me, tell them you wanted directions to Mr. Manley’s. He sells venison jerky.”

“Okay,” Serenity said slowly and I grinned, imagining how her brain was handling the cover up story. “You were a friend of Naomi’s?”

“Her best, that’s why I’m talking to you like this.” Sandra looked around and lowered her voice even further. “Naomi was messing around with an English boy and I think you ought to go talk to him about what happened to her. Maybe he knows something.”

Serenity leaned over the table, close to Sandra and said, “What’s his name?”

“Will Johnson. He drives a big black pick-up truck. And, he has a sister named Taylor. That’s all I got to tell you. You better go now. Please don’t say a thing about what I told you. Please?” she begged.

“No, of course not, it’ll be our secret.” Serenity rose promptly as she was asked to do. I couldn’t help but feel sympathy for the Amish girl. Her face was tense as she chewed a bite from her sandwich and stared down at the rough wood of the table.

“Thank you,” Serenity told the girl as she passed by, only to be ignored in return.

I was considering asking Serenity to join me for supper that night to dine on the steaks that we were purchasing, but there was clearly something else on her mind. She looked up at me and said, “You better hurry up with the meat, Daniel.”

“Why the rush?” I asked, pausing before I reached for the door knob of the shop.

“Because we have to pay Will a visit—now,” Serenity said. Her face was masked of all emotion.

“Do you know where to find him?” I figured it would take some time to track the guy down.

“Oh, yeah,” Serenity’s eyes met mine.

My heart sped up when she said, “He’s my nephew.”

10

NAOMI

September 6th

T
he bright colorful lights decorating the amusement rides and the blaring music were overwhelming to Naomi’s senses. She took a deep breath, smelling the grilling hamburgers, cotton candy and fried food. Without thinking she smiled up at Will. He returned the smile and reached for her hand, which she gave to him without hesitation. She giggled and bumped her side into his as the warmth of happiness spread through her. With a belly full of funnel cake and fries and a purple stuffed bear clenched tightly under her arm, she could honestly say that she was having the best time of her life.

Glancing down at the jeans and t-shirt she wore, Naomi could hardly believe she was in borrowed clothes from Taylor. Luckily, the girls were about the same size. Naomi had to admit, she felt more self-conscious in the clingy shirt and tight pants than she thought she would. She savored the moment
though, knowing that she’d probably never get the chance to dress like an Englisher again.

Flinging her long hair over her shoulder was the strangest part of all. To be out in public with her blond hair bouncing against her back was a real treat.

As if Will was reading her mind, he said, “It must feel awesome to let your hair down.”

“You have no idea. But people keep looking at me—maybe it’s too long,” Naomi said, noticing a middle aged guy eyeing her as they passed in opposite directions.

“Are you kidding me? Any girl would kill for hair like yours. The guys—well, let’s just say that men dig long hair.” He winked at Naomi, causing another round of butterflies to flutter in her stomach. She glanced away, blushing. Will laughed and squeezed her hand. She tried to keep her mouth still, but she couldn’t fight the sensation. She grinned back at him.

“Can we go on that one?” Naomi asked, staring up at the giant wheel in the sky.

“Of, course! You can’t go to a Fair without riding the Ferris wheel. I bet we’ll be able to see half the county from up there.”

Just before it was their turn in line, Will noticed a young girl about to be turned away from a ride because she didn’t have enough tickets. Naomi watched as he reached into his pocket and handed the girl how many she needed. The girl thanked him shyly before she sprinted up the ramp to join her friends.

Naomi’s cheeks reddened with emotion. She turned away quickly so that Will wouldn’t see. His act of kindness had touched her in a way she wasn’t expecting. The English boy surprised her at every turn.

Once they were loaded up, they moved a little ways and then stopped while other people got on or off. Naomi was impatient to get moving. She leaned over the edge, marveling at how high they were already.

“Are you afraid of heights?” Will asked.

“I don’t know. I’ve never been up this high before. But so far I just feel really excited.”

Will took up her hand again and said, “If you get nervous, just squeeze my hand. You’ll be fine.”

“Is that all I have to do?” Naomi smiled wickedly at him.

Will laughed, “Well, you’re more than welcome to do anything you like.”

Naomi felt the heat burn her face just as the wheel began moving with more speed. The quick jolt caused her to press in against Will.

Will’s hot breath tickled her ear when he asked, “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Oh, yes. It’s wonderful.”

With the light from the nearly full moon illuminating the country side in all directions, Naomi turned her head and searched. Squinting, she could just make out the top of Raymond Schwartz’s silo. The sight of its copper tiled roof shining in the distance sent a ripple of tension through her. A mile or so from that silo was her family’s farm. She imagined her brothers and sisters fast asleep in their quilt covered beds and hoped that Dat and mother were doing the same. After all, it had been a busy day for everyone, what with Mother baking extra loaves of bread for the mother-to-be Beatrice Miller and Dat and her brothers spending the evening digging a hole to bury the old plow horse who had unexpectedly gone down that morning.

Naomi said a silent prayer that no one woke and went looking for her and then she did her best to erase the worried thoughts. There wasn’t anything she could do about it now anyway. She’d already committed sin and she only hoped that God would forgive her.

They went around too many times to count, the warm wind whipping Naomi’s hair out behind her until she became dizzy. About the time she wished that the machine would slow, it did.

Naomi breathed out and exclaimed, “Can we ride it again?”

Will was a good sport. He rode all the rides with her twice, to the point that he said if he rode one more he might not be able to drive home. By that time Naomi was hungry again, so Will bought two ice cream cones. They licked them while they wandered through the livestock barns.

The rides were amazing, but seeing all the prize animals was a treat for Naomi too. Will enjoyed petting the wide foreheads of the cows and looking through the wire mesh at the fancy chickens as much as she did. Naomi even had to argue with him not to buy her a fluffy white bunny that she petted. She explained to him that if there was a new critter in the barn in the morning, Father would become suspicious.