Larkspur (3 page)

“
I didn’t tell anyone,”
Katy said.

“
Paddie?”

“
Oh, I told Paddie,” Katy
giggled.

“
Mmm,” Jill smiled at
Katy.

“
Paddie won’t tell
anyone,” Katy said.

“
Then why do I know that
Paddie knows?” Jill asked.

“
Because you read his
mind?” Katy giggled.

Jill shook her head and smiled. Katy thought
her joke was very funny, so she laughed and laughed. Jill took an
off ramp that Katy had never been, and she fell silent.

“
What’s that?” Katy
pointed to a large building surrounded by barbed wire.

“
That’s the Denver Jail
and the women’s prison,” Jill said. “People who make big mistakes
have to spend their life there.”

Katy nodded. Her eyes went wide and she felt
a little scared. Her mind could feel all the rage and despair
coming from the building. Mommy stopped the SUV and turned away
from the prison. Katy rotated around to watch at the prison and
Mommy turned into a small parking lot. It was full of cars, but
Katy didn’t look at them. She was too worried about the prison to
care.

“
Why don’t you come out
with me?” Jill asked.

“
Yes,” Katy unhooked her
strap.

Katy didn’t want to be here in this parking
lot near the prison. Jill came around to the door and let Katy out.
She took Katy’s hand and they walked into what looked like a little
farm. There were sheep and goats and cows and . . .
lots of animals. Katy kept track of all of the animals on her
fingers. There were so many animals that Katy ran out of fingers.
Jill pulled on the door to the office and found it locked.

“
Shoot,” Jill
said.

Katy looked up at Mommy.

“
Katy, can you stay right
here?” Jill asked. “Don’t move or leave with anyone or anything.
Can you do that for me?”

“
Okay, Mommy,” Katy
said.

“
And you’ll be safe?” Jill
touched her heart with worry.

“
I will be careful Mommy,”
Katy nodded to show her sincerity.

“
Ok,” Jill gave Katy a
worried look and trotted around the corner.

Katy waited and watched. A couple of girls
about Noelle’s age were dropped off by their moms. They came by
Katy on their way to a big pig. Katy giggled when the pig snorted.
She felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at her Mommy.

“
Excuse me,” Jill said.
“Have you seen my daughter? I just left her for a
moment.”

Katy wanted to scream with joy.

“
What does she look like?”
Katy asked.

“
She’s about your height,”
Jill tapped her chin. “She’s four . . .”

“
It’s me, Mommy!” Katy
beamed. “Only I’m five!”

Mommy gasped and took a step back.

“
Katy-baby! It is you,”
Jill said. “I bet all these people are waiting for you!”

“
What?” Katy’s eyes welled
with tears.

Jill held out her hand and Katy took it.
They walked around the corner to find every person in her family
and in Paddie’s family standing around talking.

“
Katy! Katy!” Paddie ran
forward. “You’ll never guess what!”

“
What?” Katy jumped up and
down with excitement.

“
We got horses!” Paddie
said. “For us! You
and
me!”

Katy gasped. Paddie grabbed her shoulders
and they began to jump up and down. Paddie’s mommy came to get him
and Katy looked up at Mommy.

“
You’ve been reading
everyone’s minds,” Jill said. “This was the only way to surprise
you.”

Jill crouched down to Katy.

“
I’m sorry if I hurt your
feelings,” Jill said.

“
I
love
surprises, Mommy,” Katy said.
“But how did you keep a secret, Mommy?”

“
Mr. Colin,” Jill said.
“You’ve wanted a horse since before we came to live with Daddy. You
and Paddie had so much fun riding the horses in the last couple
months that Jacob asked Mr. Colin to find one for us. He did better
than that. He found two gentle horses and a couple of younger
horses. We’ll share horses with Paddie’s family so you can ride
with me or daddy or any of Paddie’s family or our
family.”

“
Oh Mommy,” Katy held out
her arms and hugged Jill tight.

“
Are we late?” a woman’s
voice said.

Katy looked up to see Valerie ran around the
corner. Mike followed her carrying Jackie in her car seat.

“
Auntie Valerie!” Katy
screeched.

“
Who are you, child?”
Valerie arched a perfect eyebrow. “Why are you speaking to
me?”

“
It’s me, Auntie Valerie!”
Katy said. “You don’t recognize me because I’m five!”

“
Katy! Happy
Birthday!”

Valerie picked up Katy and carried her into
the party.

Jill stood back and watched her Katy-baby
re-introduce her way through the crowd of people who loved her. Her
mother, Anjelika, re-introduced Katy to Katy’s great-grandfather,
Otis, the aged Russian Mafioso. Otis played it off with perfection
insisting Katy introduce herself in Russian. Katy fumbled the words
and beamed with joy when he threw his head back and laughed.

Most of the adults were drinking coffee and
eating pastries made by those Irish bakers. Sam picked Katy up and
twirled her around. Like Tanesha did every year, she carried Katy
off to a private corner where she gave Katy her special present —
this year, a lovely set of single pearl earrings and a promise to
take her to get her ears pierced. Jill felt a hand on her shoulder
and glanced over to see Jacob. Aden and Blane came in behind him.
Honey zipped around them to the crowd.

“
How did it go?” Jacob
asked.

“
She cried,” Jill said.
“But look.”

While Katy beamed, Heather pulled a red
T-shirt over Katy’s head that said: “Keep calm and ride horses.”
The T-shirt was just on when Charlie came up behind Katy and lifted
her onto his shoulders. They sang a rousing “Happy Birthday to
Katy” while Charlie carried her around. As if to punctuate the
song, Paddie’s brother Conner howled at the end of the song and all
the adults laughed. Sandy helped Katy cut her special
chocolate-chocolate-chocolate cake that Sandy had made for Katy
every birthday since she was six months old.

“
It’s a good party,” Jacob
said.

“
She won’t be my baby for
much longer,” Jill said.

“
Just the rest of our
lives,” Jacob said.

“
Are we
ever
going to ride our
horses?” Paddie asked.

“
What do you think, Jake?”
Colin asked. “Are you too battered to ride today?”

“
Never,” Jacob moved into
the crowd.

“
Happy Birthday,
Katy-baby,” Jill said under her breath.

“
Mommy! Come see me!” Katy
yelled.

Jill ran to catch up.

Chapter Two
Hundred and Fifty
Need to make
decisions

Sunday morning — 10:22 a.m.

“
What’s wrong?” Megan,
Jill’s eldest sister, whispered to Jill as they walked into the
waiting area of the medical offices near Valerie and Mike’s
apartment. Jill glanced at her and followed the doctor to the other
treatment room. All of the friends and family involved made for a
large gathering.

Camilla, the midwife, and Jill’s
obstetrician argued over Jill’s birthing plan almost the entire
time. MJ, an Army trained medic, was able to keep Camilla calm
while encouraging the doctor to follow the plan. Jacob and Blane
kept everything moving and organized. While Steve, Jill’s brother
and Honey’s nurse, seemed to be silently-absorbing what was
said.

Megan grabbed Jill’s arm and kept her from
following the rest of them into the next room.

“
What’s going on?” Megan
asked again.

Jill shrugged. Megan raised her eyebrows
with expectation. Jill felt the-biggest-sister-eyebrow-pressure
like a weight on her heart. She looked at Megan.

“
Don’t you think it was
easier the last time?” Jill whispered.

“
When you went into labor
at work and kept working until the last moment?” Megan whispered.
“Is this a question?”

As if she was twelve, Jill rolled her eyes
and moved to leave. Megan held her in place. Jill didn’t look at
her sister for fear of the biggest-sister-eyebrow treatment.

“
What?” Megan’s fierce
whisper made Jill look at her.

“
All of this is really
amazing,” Jill said. “Wonderful, fabulous, even. I get to have my
babies at home with my daughter and husband and family around me.
I’m healthy. The boys are healthy. If anything goes wrong, MJ will
be there to monitor for problems and the doctor is on call. Worst
case, we’re rushed off to St. Joe’s and I have the babies in one of
the best maternity hospitals in the country.”

“
Exactly,” Megan nodded.
“So what’s the problem?”

Jill shrugged.

“
You don’t know?” Megan
asked.

Jill gave a slight nod.

“
Do you think it’s
a . . . you know?” Megan whispered.

“
Premonition?” Jill shook
her head. “I think it’s a sense that all of this preparation will
go for nothing. Something else is coming.”

“
Any ideas what?” Megan’s
hand went instinctively to her heart.

“
Nothing more than what I
said,” Jill shook her head. “Just that all of this won’t happen.
When the time comes, it will be me and the boys — our
journey.”

“
I will come,” Megan
hugged her. “No matter what or when. I have my pager on all the
time.”

“
So does Jacob. So does
almost the entire city and county of Denver,” Jill smiled. “Blane
is going to have a bone marrow transplant with the boys’ cord blood
when we’re all done. It may save his life once and for
all.”

“
You seem so sure,” Megan
said. “I can hear it in your voice.”

“
I guess I am,” Jill
nodded.

“
What can I do?” Megan
asked.

“
I don’t know, sis,” Jill
shrugged. “I wish I did.”

Megan hugged her again.

“
Jill? We need you to make
some decisions,” the doctor called her into the treatment room.
Jill gave Megan another squeeze and joined the others.

~~~~~~~~

Sunday mid-day — 12:22 a.m.

Wanda’s mother opened the door and Wanda
hobbled on her crutches into the small conference room at the
downtown Denver Police station. Charlie and Tink looked up and
smiled at her when she came in. Tink waved her over to their side
of the table. Charlie got up to help her into a seat and brought a
chair for her to prop her leg up. She sat next to Ivy and looked
around the room.

Wanda’s mom, Edith, was saying hello to
Tink’s new mom, Heather. Ivy’s aunts, Delphie and Gracie were
talking to each other near a corner of the room. Sitting next to
Charlie, Sandy leaned back to talk to Heather, who was sitting next
to Tink.

Wanda leaned forward to talk to Tink, but
Tink was gazing at Charlie.

“
You can’t talk to her,”
Ivy said in a low conspiratorial voice. “She’s all into
Pan.”

“
I guess so,” Wanda
said.

Ivy nodded.

“
You know why we’re here?”
Wanda asked.

“
No, but no one tells me
anything ‘cuz I’m just a kid,” Ivy shrugged. “How are you
feeling?”

“
My leg hurts,” Wanda
said. “They’re going to have to do surgery on my knee when my bone
heals.”

“
Sucks,” Ivy
nodded.

“
I just hope I can still
run,” Wanda said.

Ivy’s eyes scanned Wanda’s face and flicked
to her body. Sure Ivy was judging her, Wanda looked away. Ivy
touched her arm.

“
I’m glad you’re here,”
Ivy said.

“
Why?” Wanda
asked.

“
It’s nice to not be the
only weirdo here,” Ivy said.

Wanda laughed. She knew she should be
offended, but Ivy was right. In this room, she and Ivy were the
weirdos.

“
They told my dad not to
come,” Wanda said. “Even though he was there. Charlie’s new dad and
Tink’s new dad aren’t here either. Why do you think that
is?”

Ivy shook her head and lifted a shoulder in
a shrug.

“
Wanda!” Delphie
said.

She came over and made a fuss. Wanda didn’t
know what was more embarrassing — having Ivy acknowledge her
weirdness or having Delphie’s fuss over her. She was glad when her
mom came over to talk to Delphie.

“
I saw you with that guy
when we came in,” Ivy whispered.

“
Frankie?” Wanda
asked.

“
I don’t know his name,”
Ivy said. “He was there, that night that . . . you
know, with me.”

Wanda felt ashamed and sad all at once. She
didn’t know what to say.

“
Oh no,” Ivy shook her
head. “He was just there. When they left, he gave me money for a
cab. He called and waited with me.”

Ivy scanned Wanda’s face again.

“
I mean, he
could have
called the
cops or whatever,” Ivy said. “But I remember how scared he looked
and . . .”