Learn to Fly (59 page)

He made his way
slowly towards the singer and took a seat next to him on the floor.

“
I
don’t want to fight with you, Brookings.” Luke said
roughly. His eyes heavy with fatigue and discouragement.

“
That’s
not why I’m here.” Shane answered flatly. He clenched
his jaw. Being a dick was so much easier, but Shane wanted to be a
better person. How he hated himself right now.

They sat in silence
for a while, the ice maker down the hall and a movie with explosions
in the room behind them, the only noise.

“
She
hasn’t slept with me.” Shane said, his voice echoing in
the silence. He felt an indescribable need to defend Lenny’s
honor. Maybe because he had been the one to ruin her in the past, it
would be a way of making amends. Shane wasn’t sure. He didn’t
particularly
like
Luke Casey but he knew Lenny cared for him. And that was important
to Shane.

“
I
know,” Luke sighed in frustration.

“
Then,
why did you…?” Shane’s voice trailed off.

“
I
was mad. And I still don’t know why you’re here.”
Luke threw a small glare in Shane’s direction.

Shane shrugged.
Luke had a point. It did look suspicious at first glance.

“
I’m
not after your girl,” Shane declared.

Luke ‘hmphed’
and leaned his head back, looking up at the ceiling. “What
makes you think she’s still my girl?” He asked the
ceiling more than Shane.

Shane considered his
words carefully before saying them. “I’ve known Lenny a
long time,” he began slowly, “And she’s never
slapped anyone. Kicked the crap out a couple of guys and has
definitely thrown some punches but never slapped.”

“
And
that helps me how?” Luke let out a disgruntled chuckle.

“
I
think…you have to care really deeply for someone to let them
get to you that much.” Shane shook his head and looked into
his lap. “She never even fought with me.”

Luke frowned and
looked over at Shane. “Never?”

“
Nope.
She’d just shut herself off or leave town for a while. I
guess I always knew I wasn’t worth her time.”

“
So,
you’re saying the slap is a good thing?” Luke asked
skeptically.

“
Yeah,
that’s what I’m saying.” Shane’s serious
face cracked a smile. “But that’s Lenny for ya, when she
loves, she goes all in.”

***

Luke swallowed hard.
He missed her. He wanted to start pounding on her door and demand to
work this out. But he thought she might be sleeping and he didn’t
want to disturb her. She had looked so tired.

“
Did
you really get a tattoo of her name on your arm?” Luke
suddenly asked.

“
Ha,
yeah. You wanna see it?” Shane pulled up her sleeve to reveal
his perfectly sculpted bicep and a simple script:

Free
Bird

“
Why
did you do that?” Luke asked.

“
What
can I say, I’m a lifelong fan.” Shane shrugged and
smiled, lowering his sleeve.

“
Get
some sleep, man.” Shane started to stand up. “If this
storm breaks tomorrow, she’s gonna head for the highest peak.”
He raised an eyebrow, “You ready to chase her?”

Luke gave a crooked
grin through his weariness as an answer. “I’ll think I’ll
sleep out here…just in case.”

Shane nodded and
headed back to his room. He grabbed a couple of the extra pillows
and a blanket and brought it to Luke in the hallway.

Luke nodded his
thanks and Shane left it at that. He hoped that Luke could put
things right. He wasn’t a bad guy, he’d just made some
piss poor choices. Shane had been there. But Lenny had forgiven
Shane, so she would probably forgive Luke as well. Hopefully, sooner
rather than later. Those two belonged together.

Lenny’s
growling stomach is what woke her up. She was starving. Her first
thought was for pancakes. Her second thought was Luke.

She crept to the
door to look out the peep hole and held her breath. What if he
wasn’t there? What if he had left while things were still ugly
between them? Lenny let the air out of her lungs as she observed
Luke’s slumped over figure in the hallway.

He looked pitiful.
He’d tried to stay propped up but had nodded off sometime in
the night and was slouched, painfully crooked. Lenny’s heart
squeezed inside of her chest. What kind of a man would sleep outside
of the door of the girl who had publicly chastised him and then
slapped him?

Luke Casey was that
kind of man.

Lenny went to the
bathroom and rushed through her routine. She shook her head to
herself as she contemplated what her next move should be. She
couldn’t see a way out of talking to him. He obviously wasn’t
going to leave until she did. She brushed her teeth and pulled her
silky hair into a loose ponytail at the nape of her neck. She looked
down at her pajamas and decided she didn’t want look like a
total mess.

She tried to find
something clean to wear amongst her pile of dirty clothing. Settling
on some well-worn jeans and her black, lace-back riding tank, Lenny
quickly changed. She slipped on some thick socks and laced up her
boots. She grabbed a black and white flannel from off the floor and
shoved her arms through the sleeves, not bothering to button it up.

She closed her eyes
to steady her breathing before opening the door. She pulled it open
quietly and slowly stepped into the hall. Luke didn’t stir.
She looked up and down the hall but didn’t hear any other
activity aside from the small click of her door closing behind her.
It was still early, the rest of the group would probably be asleep
for at least another hour.

Lenny looked down at
Luke and noticed his appearance for the first time. She had been so
upset with him the night before that she didn’t see the circles
and puffiness under his eyes. But he was still as handsome as she
remembered, his long hair nearly to his shoulders and partially
covering his face.. She knelt down next to him and readjusted his
pillow.

Luke’s eyes
opened slightly and then closed again. Lenny gently touched his
face, brushing his hair away. His eyes opened again and fixed on
her. Lenny smiled slightly as his brain caught up with his vision.

“
Lenny?”
His voice croaked.

“
What
are you doing sleeping in the hallway?” She asked softly.

Luke pushed himself
into a sitting position and tried to reorient himself. He rubbed the
sleep from his eyes and looked at his surroundings. His vision came
to rest on Lenny and he looked her up and down, finally settling on
her face.

She tried to work
the moisture back into her mouth, suddenly at a loss for words under
the scrutiny of his crystal blue eyes. Her anger from the previous
evening momentarily forgotten in his larger than life presence.

“
You
wanna get some breakfast?” She couldn’t think of
anything else to say. She knew they needed to talk but she didn’t
know where to start and she didn’t want to be in the hallway
when the others started to rise from their comas.

Luke nodded once and
got into a standing position. He gathered his pillows and blanket
and silently deposited them in his room. He disappeared for a few
minutes, leaving Lenny in the hallway. Just when she was afraid he
wasn’t coming back, he reemerged, his face washed and breath
fresh. His eyes brightened when he looked at her, or did she imagine
that?

They didn’t
speak as they got on the elevator and walked to the small café
that was part of the hotel. The hostess seated them and they sat
silently, staring at their menus. Lenny couldn’t help but feel
incredibly awkward. Maybe this was a bad idea. She looked sideways
out the windows and silently cursed the continuing blizzard. She
wanted nothing more than to run out into the swirling snow and
disappear from the uncomfortable conversation they had yet to begin.

The waitress came
and got their order and then left them to sit in their silence again.
Luke shifted in his seat and finally leaned against the table,
putting his elbows on the top and resting his chin in his hands.

“
I'm
sorry about the thing with the girl in the bar. It was stupid and I
have no excuse.” His normally smiling eyes were tired and
forlorn.

“
Luke-”
Lenny started, closing her eyes. Not anticipating the pain that
would accompany the strangeness of his apology.

“
I
don't have a right to ask for anymore chances or even for
forgiveness.” He slid his hand across the table and
tentatively touched the top of her finger tips.

Lenny sighed
heavily. He didn't understand, how could he?

“
I'm
also sorry about releasing your song. You were right. It was
special, I should have kept it special.” Luke’s mouth
turned up on one side slightly. “That’s what I get for
listening to Sway.”

“
You
took relationship advice from Sway?” Lenny asked, aghast.

“
He
has a girlfriend now,” Luke defended.

“
No
way.” Lenny smiled suddenly and Luke grinned in response. “I
miss those guys,” she added quietly.

“
Then
come back,” Luke pleaded frankly.

“
Luke,
you know that wouldn’t be a good idea.” Lenny swallowed
the lump that rose in her throat. He wasn’t going to make this
easy on her, was he?

“
Why?”
Luke asked, covering her hand with his. “We’re great
together. Why is this such a bad idea?”

Lenny’s skin
awakened when his hand grabbed hers and she got mad at herself
inwardly for having such a reaction. If she was going to explain
this to him than she need to keep her wits about her.

“
Did
you not notice the epic fight we had last night?” Lenny looked
at him earnestly. “Being on tour put us in a kind of bubble.
It protected us from reality. When I first left, I thought that maybe
I was making a mistake because I missed you so bad but...” she
looked out the window and shook her head. “Seeing you in those
pictures hurt more than I thought possible. Our relationship doesn’t
translate into our regular lives.” She pulled her hand away
from his and took a sip of water. “If you think about it, I
think you’ll see it too.”

Luke looked down at
the table. His shoulders slowly sagged into a defeated posture and
Lenny thought that maybe she had reached him after all. Maybe he
could see what she could see.

Their food came and
they ate silently. Luke wouldn’t look at her and Lenny felt
like she was leaving him all over again. Why had he come to Alaska?
What purpose did this serve? He was obviously moving on back in
Boston. The pictures flashed into Lenny’s mind again and she
visibly shuttered, getting Luke’s attention.

“
Something
wrong with your food?” He asked, concerned.

“
No,”
Lenny took a drink of water, “Just an unpleasant memory.”

Luke nodded and went
back to his meal.

“
Hey,
guys.” Nick approached their table cautiously.

“
Nick,”
Lenny greeted and nodded at Luke, “This is Luke Casey, Luke
this is Nick Federa. He runs the place up in Thompson Pass.”

“
Yeah,
we met briefly last night.” Nick offered his hand and Luke
shook it. “The storm should clear out by today,” Nick
was addressing Lenny again, “We should be able to go back to
the cabins by tomorrow.”

Nick must have
noticed the tension at the table but he decided to add an invitation
to Luke, “You’re more than welcome to join us, if you
want.”

“
Luke
probably won’t be staying.” Lenny interjected before
Luke could answer.