Left to Love (The Next Door Boys) (34 page)

“What we’re still going through,” I said.

“Only two more, right?”

I nodded. “Only two more and then we’ll see…” I trailed off. Then we’ll see if the cancer is gone for now or if treatments need to change, which for me, meant the end. It was probably a bad perception for me to have, but that’s what it was.

“Don’t think that, Leigh. I can feel your body change.”

“Sorry, it’s hard.”

“John and Mark are anxious to see me again.”

“The Seattle guys.”

“Yeah, them.”

“Are you going to go?”

“I told them I had one more month. They really want me closer.”

“This is kind of exciting isn’t it?” I asked. I was so, so proud of him. “I can’t believe how well this is going for you. You love working with them don’t you?”

“I do, but it’s not just for me, it’s for us and it means Seattle.”

“I grew up there. I love Seattle.”

“It will create some extra expense for Nathan to see Amanda, if I can keep talking him into going.”

“That’s okay.”

“You’re really okay with this?”
His brows rose.

“Of course.” Part of me hoped I’d be well enough.

Brian looked at me carefully. “We’ll go together. Don’t worry.” He ran his hand across my face again and then across my head. “I’ll kinda miss this.” He laughed softly playing with my bald head.

“I won’t.”

“Won’t what?” He looked at me.

“Won’t miss it.”

“When?” He pulled up the corners of his mouth just slightly.

Now I got it. I smiled back. “When I’m all better and I have shiny hair again.”

“Hmm.” He said looking at me.

“W
hat?”

“I wonder what color it’ll grow in this time?” He
smirked
.

I laughed and leaned my head forward into his chest. He reached his arm around my back and pulled my body next to his until we faced each other. I felt lighter. I felt healthier. I felt hopeful. I snuggled into him and put my arm around his waist and ran my hand slowly up and down his back.

“I love you,” I whispered into his chest.

“I love you, too.” I could feel his chin on my head. Once again, life felt good.

- - -

We all had a big dinner on our porch that night. My hammock was still the most comfortable place for me. Jaron offered the prayer and I had to peek up at Joseph to see what he was doing. His eyes were closed at first, but he must have sensed he was being watched because he opened his eyes and I smiled at him briefly before closing mine again to hear the end of the prayer.

I didn’t eat anything. My appetite had completely disappeared. Right now food meant throwing up, and it was really hard to get past that. Brian didn’t miss anything and came out with a shake, which I happily drank. Poor Nathan was filled with disappointment that he couldn’t have a shake for dinner.

“So, are you headed to Mom and Dad’s next?” I asked Joseph at the end of the evening.

“No, I need to get back home. Mostly I wanted to see you and Jaron. He was twelve the last time I saw him.” Joseph looked like he hardly believed that.

“Give Lori and those babies a hug for me will ya?”

“Oh, they’re both running around now.” He smiled. “The baby part of their life is disappearing fast.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. Time flies.”

“Yes it does,” I agreed. And all I could hope is that the last bits of my chemo would fly by as fast as I wanted them to.

TWENTY-NINE

Eleven of Twelve

So Close

Monday came. My mother arrived the night before as was standard, and Brian and I left in the morning. Jaron and I thought it would be better if she didn’t know that Joseph had just been here. He’d see Mom and Dad at some point in time.

“Walk with me inside?” Brian asked, after he opened my door at the hospital.

“That’d be great.”

I made him climb up on th
e bed with me. He was happy to—
even though we both knew he had work to do. I ignored the nurses setting me up and lay on Brian’s chest. It was the onl
y place I wanted to be
.

“Morning you two,
” Dr. Watts said as he came in. He stopped when he got to the foot of my bed and I smiled down at him from my spot on Brian. “Well, it’s nice to see you back, Leigh. You’ve honestly had me a little worried.” A woman, nearly as tall as him with long brown hair stood behind him. “I’d like you to meet my wife, Abby.”

“He’s told me so much about you, Leigh. He’s lost quite a few nights sleep over you lately.” She walked up the side of my bed to stand next to me.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. It’s
one of the reasons I love him so
much. He cares a lot about what he does.” She
exchanged glances with her husband.

“And h
e does it well.” I smiled
. I felt terrible
,
but more okay than I had since the beginning.

“Only two more, Leigh.” Dr. Watts rested an arm on his wife. “And then you can start healing back up again and continue on.”

“Yep.” I smiled up at Brian and he tightened his arms around me.

“It was nice meeting you finally.” Abby smiled at me.

“You too.” I nodded. “It’s amazing, I’ve known your husband for all this time and I sometimes forget that he has a life outside of all this craziness.”

“Me and two kids. April and Henry.”

“How old are they?”

“Eleven and thirteen.”

“I bet it went fast,” I mused.

“Very,” she agreed. “But it’s been a lot of good years.”

“Thanks fo
r coming in.
I’m glad I wa
s more myself today than I have
been.”

“Me too.”

Dr. Watts wrapped his arm more tightly around his wife and they started to walk out together.

“We’ll see you very shortly, Leigh.
And thank you for finally picking up your scrip.
” Dr. Watts smiled again as they walked out the door.

Yep. Shortly. For the last one.

- - -

Mom left on the Friday after treatment eleven, as was our routine. That first weekend after a hospital session was a lot easier now that Brian wasn’t working at the bar. He was over at Stuart’s house when Nathan came in from school Monday.
             

“Leigh, I don’t feel good.”

“How don’t you feel good?” I asked.

“My stomach hurts.”

“Well, your daddy is next door. C
an you walk over there?” I asked. We hadn’t had to deal with any sickness all winter. I didn’t want to start n
ow. I was way too weak
.

He threw up all over the floor.

I grabbed my phone and called Brian
, but couldn’t just leave Nathan standing in front of a puddle of his own vomit
. I stood up and helped Nathan walk to the bathroom.

“Brian, Nathan’s sick.”

“I’m on my way…
don’t touch him, Leigh.”

“Too late.” I hung up.

I put my arms around Nathan and let him to the bathroom. I rinsed a washcloth in the sink to clean his face, and sat him on the floor. “Better?”

“A little.”

“Your daddy’s on his way.” I stood up and washed my hands
, panic starting to set in
.

“Leigh?” Brian’s
worried
voice called from the door.

“We’re in here.” My body leaned against the
counter for support. My legs shook, from both weakness and adrenaline.

Brian picked up Nathan and ran him out of the house. “Don’t move, Leigh!” he called back as he went out the front door. I didn’t know what to do, so I did as told
. I sat and waited for Brian
.

He
was back
in minutes. “In the shower, now. L
et’s get you cleaned off.”

I didn’t argue. I sat down in the bottom of the tub and let the water wash over me. Brian helped me li
ft the wet clothes over my head, and
started to scrub the tiny room
with Clorox
.

“I’ll be right back. I’m going to clean up the mess in the kitchen. Do you think you can get out of the tub on your own? I don’t want to touch you until I’ve had a chance to shower as well.”

“Are we taking this a little too far?” I asked. But part of me knew we weren’t. Not with how weak my body was.

“Nope.” He smiled
, trying to keep his voice light. “I’ll be right back.”

I scrubbed myself off with soa
p and crawled out of the tub, pulling
a
towel over my shoulders and stepped
into our room.

Brian came in freshly showered a few minutes later. He didn’t look quite as frantic as before and helped me get dressed in clean pajamas. He sat on the bed facing me and took my hands in his.

“Where’s Nathan?” I asked.

“Staying with the pregnant nurse next door.” A corner of his mouth pulled up.

“Well, she can’t get sick! He shouldn’t be there.” I’d
feel horrible if Megan and Jaron got sick, just because I wasn’t supposed to.

“Better her than you. She’s a nurse, she’s pregnant
and
she works with sick kids. Her immune system is solid. Worry about your brother.” He tried to laugh.