Lessons in Love (Flirt) (23 page)

“What?” Ling sounded surprised. “Wait, Bailey. We’re just trying to figure out what happened here.”

“You already know what happened. I thought Logan was cute, I did something stupid, the end. But I’m really sorry, and I don’t want you guys to hate me, so I’m backing off. I mean it. Okay?”

They just stared at me, not saying anything. I felt a flash of irritation. What more did they want? Did they expect me to swear an oath in blood before they’d forgive me? Or—my heart constricted as I thought of it—maybe they just
weren’t
going to forgive me. The thought made me feel panicky and trapped, like a butterfly stuck in a specimen jar.

Finally Megan spoke. “Look, we’re not telling you what to do,” she said. “We’re just asking what’s up. I mean, you’ve been spending so much time tutoring Logan and everything, it’s really not surprising if you started to have feelings for him.”

“Can we stop talking about this, please? I already said you can have him!” I cried, so desperate to make them understand that my voice came out a little louder than I’d intended. “I’m telling you, I don’t like Logan that way! I’m only spending so much time tutoring him because it will look good on my college applications.”

Ling and Megan didn’t answer. In fact, they were both staring at something over my left shoulder. Uh-oh . . .

I spun around. Logan was standing there. Had he heard what I’d just said? The answer was written all over his face. He looked shocked, angry . . . hurt?

“Logan, I—” I began.

Too late. He’d already turned and hurried away.

Chapter
Twenty

I
stared after Logan, my
heart sinking. I’d really blown it this time. And hurt a really cool guy in the process. Maybe the coolest guy I’d ever met.

But what was I supposed to do? I couldn’t risk my friendships for a guy—I wasn’t that kind of girl. Maybe now that I’d humiliated myself in front of Logan, Ling and Megan would forgive my temporary insanity. Maybe they’d even apologize for being such jerks to me. That was all I really needed—right? Then things could go back to how they were before. I could go back to my life plan.

“Bailey,” Megan exclaimed. “Go!”

“What?” I said, turning toward her. Was she really going to be that way? To my surprise, she was smiling.

“Seriously, go.” She reached out and gave me a little shove. “Go after him before he gets away!”

“What?” Ling and I said in unison.

Megan glanced at Ling. “You know we have to back off,” she said. “Isn’t that what we just spent the entire game talking about?”

Ling frowned. “I thought we hadn’t decided for sure.”

“Come on.” Megan rolled her eyes. “It’s obvious that Bailey’s really into him. I can’t believe we didn’t see it before.”

Ling glanced at me, not saying anything. Just then Simone jogged over. “What’s going on?” she asked.

“Ling and I just realized Bailey really likes Logan,” Megan said.

Simone snorted. “Well, duh. Took you long enough to catch on.”

“I know, right?” Megan smiled at me. She didn’t look upset at all anymore. “Now we just have to convince Ling.”

“Fine, whatever.” Ling wasn’t exactly smiling, but she didn’t look mad, either. “I’m convinced, okay? I wasn’t really that into him anyway.”

“Awesome!” Simone grabbed her and hugged her. Ling pushed her away, pretending to be annoyed. But this time she actually
was
smiling.

“So?” Megan gazed at me. “What are you waiting for?”

What
was
I waiting for? I could see Logan over by the dugout with some of the other guys. Even after what had just happened, I still felt that little flutter of sparks when I looked at him.

But was sparks enough? What was that, really? Just an involuntary physiological reaction, a potent mix of adrenaline, dopamine, and probably a bunch of other brain chemicals I’d learn more about in med school someday. If that was all there was to it, I could get the same basic effect by skydiving or something. If that was all there was to it, maybe this thing with Logan wasn’t worth all the angst and distraction. Maybe it was better to let him go. To stick to my plan.

Then I thought about the stuff my mom had told me the day before, about how plans don’t always work out the way you think they will. How one little detail, like studying abroad, can change everything.

Could that first flutter of sparks have changed
me
? If it had stopped there, probably not. But those feelings had kept going, getting even stronger as I’d gotten to know Logan better.

And suddenly, just like that, I got it. There
was
something about him—something special. Something about
us
, Logan and me, together. Even Megan and Ling seemed to get it now. Looking at the evidence—especially that moment yesterday, when I’d been pretty sure he was thinking about kissing me—it was pretty clear that Logan felt it too. That he’d felt it all along. Or at least he had until . . .

I swallowed hard, picturing the hurt look in his eyes when he’d overheard me just now. Had I ruined everything?

“Well?” Simone sounded impatient. “Why are you still standing here with us when you could be over there smooching on your guy?”

I bit my lip, glancing again at Logan. His back was to me, so I couldn’t see his face. Was it my imagination that his shoulders looked tense and angry?

“He might not want to see me right now,” I told Simone.

With help from Megan and Ling, I filled her in on what had just happened. She winced when she heard what I’d said. But when I finished, she just shrugged.

“It doesn’t matter. He’ll forgive you.” She sounded so certain, it was hard not to believe her.

“Yeah, just apologize.” Megan smiled hopefully. “What have you got to lose?”

Ling nodded. “You’ve got to at least give it a try,” she said. “Otherwise you’ll hate yourself for wimping out.”

She was right. They all were. Maybe I wasn’t very experienced at this whole girl-boy thing. So what? Like my mom had said earlier, I’d never backed off from going after something I wanted before. If I started doing that, I’d never make it through med school. Or even high school, most likely.

I felt a flutter of nerves. Or was that sparks?

“Okay, here goes nothing,” I muttered.

“That’s the spirit!” Simone cried. She hugged me, while Ling and Megan patted me on the back.

Unfortunately, by the time I turned away from my friends, Logan wasn’t by the dugout anymore. I hurried over to Matt and Darius, who were hanging out by the cooler of drinks Vinnie had brought.

“Where’d Logan go?” I asked them.

Matt chugged his sports drink. “Not sure,” he said, his lips and tongue now bright blue. “He just took off.”

“He went that way, I think.” Darius pointed. “Said something about heading home.”

“Thanks.” I wandered off, feeling discouraged. So much for that. No matter how much I wanted to fix things, I wasn’t going to follow Logan home. That just seemed a little too stalkerish to me.

A flash of color caught my eye, and I looked up. For a second I wasn’t sure what I was seeing. It looked like a large purple bird darting and wheeling high up in the sky.

Then I blinked as it came into focus. It wasn’t a bird—it was a kite. I realized the south end of Campus Lawn lay beyond the trees that edged the playing fields. I also realized that that was the direction Darius had pointed. . . .

Following a hunch—yes, scientists have them!—I headed that way. By the time I reached the tree line, I could see that there were several kites soaring over the green. My heart pounded as I stepped out of the trees, squinting in the midday sunlight.

I saw him right away. Logan was standing by himself a few yards ahead. His back was to me, and his head was tilted upward. Watching the kites.

Taking a deep breath, I stepped closer. “Logan?”

He spun around, looking startled. “Bailey?” He looked happy for a second. Then his face closed in on itself. “Oh. What do you want?”

When I saw the look in his eyes, I wanted to cry. But that wouldn’t fix anything.

“I’m sorry,” I blurted out before I could lose my nerve. “I know you heard what I said back there, but I swear I didn’t mean it.”

He looked wary. “Then why’d you say it?”

“Because I’m an idiot?” I tried. But no, that wasn’t quite right. “Um, I mean because I thought Ling and Megan were mad at me. See, they’ve been having this stupid competition over you ever since you moved here, and then they found out I was hanging out with you outside of school, and they freaked out, and I thought . . .”

I trailed off, noticing that he looked completely confused by now. “Wait,” he said. “What do you mean, they were competing over me?”

“They thought you were cute, I guess.” I shrugged. “They’re both sort of boy crazy, and they’re also pretty competitive, so it just got a little out of hand.”

That didn’t seem to clear things up too much, at least judging by his expression. “Okay,” he said slowly. “But I don’t really care what they think of me. You . . .” He hesitated. “I don’t know. You’re different. I’ve never met anyone like you before.”

My breath caught in my throat. “Really?”

“Yeah.” He rocked back on his heels. “I don’t know what it is. There’s just something about you.”

“I didn’t mean that stuff,” I said. The words all came out in a rush. “About only tutoring you to get into college. I like tutoring you—I’d do it even if I never got credit.”

“Really?” It was his turn to look uncertain.

“I swear.” I took a step closer. “I’ve never met anyone like you, either.”

He stepped closer too. “It’s weird, right? I’ve lived all over the place. Met all kinds of people.” He hesitated, his eyes meeting mine. “Anyway, I’m glad my family’s going to be staying this time.”

We were less than arm’s length apart now. I held my breath. He glanced up at the kites.

Then he took another step, and leaned toward me. I was pretty sure I was supposed to close my eyes now, but I didn’t. What could I say? I was a scientist. I wanted to observe this.

His lips found mine. The sparks were all over the place now. I leaned into him, and felt his hand reach up and rest on my side.

I’m not sure which of us pulled away from the kiss first. But when we parted, we were both smiling. “Wow,” he said.

“Yeah,” I replied. “I know what you mean.”

He leaned in for another kiss. This time I let my eyes drift shut, glad that I’d decided to follow my heart instead of my head.

At least just this once.

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F
ourteen-fifty was a notable
year for not only Europe, but for world history. Gutenberg’s printing press is considered to be one of the most important inventions ever. If it weren’t for that, you wouldn’t have these books sitting on your desks.” Mrs. Gregory paused. “Now, make sure to write all of this down, folks—there
will
be a quiz on it next week.” She swiped her chalk-dusted hand across the black pants on her slim upper thigh and continued scrawling important dates about historical European events across the chalkboard.

I cast a sideways glance at Olivia, who shook her head and rolled her eyes. We were both thinking the same thing. Mrs. Gregory always threatened us with quizzes, but inside that tall, superthin body was a woman with a heart of melted butter. She went easier on us than most of our other teachers did, letting us pair up to study before tests and such.

Still, I took notes. Couldn’t take a chance on looking like a slacker right now, not with everything riding on the line.

My big chance.

My stomach flipped and I shoved that thought aside.
Focus.
Surely we’d find out soon enough who got assigned to what positions in the sophomore class’s end-of-year Renaissance faire. It was supposed to be today, from all the rumors I’d heard earlier at lunch.

“Mrs. Gregory,” Karen said from her seat in the front of the class, thrusting her arm straight into the air. Her hair cascaded like a bright-red waterfall down her back, perfectly flat-ironed and one of my great envies.
Sigh.
What I’d give to not have boring brown hair. “When are we going to find out our parts for the faire? Isn’t that supposed to be today?”