Let Me Love You (Australian Sports Star Series Book 2) (2 page)

Tamara had a sudden urge to tell Jason about her day. About that silly joke one of the girls had told her. Or how she had pressed the wrong button on the printer and created chaos. God, how much she missed him. Every day and every single minute. He’d been taken away from her way too early. Such a senseless and violent death.

She stopped the car in front of the small house she rented. Studying the yard in front of her, the image of his dead body flashed in front of her eyes, and tears started to flow down her cheeks. She wiped the tears with the back of her hand and turned off the engine. Once she reached her house, she immediately headed to the bathroom to splash some cold water on her face. Staring at her mirror image, she asked herself for the thousandth time how it possible that life put her through such hardship. She didn’t know the answer and would probably never know.

After a moment’s hesitation, she started a bath and grabbed a glass of wine before she slipped into the water.

The following week, Tamara went to St. Kilda for a walk along the beach. It was early in the evening, but the streets were already busy with traffic. The sidewalk was packed with tourists and people looking for a place to eat. By the time she reached the shore, a headache had started, and she could feel the tension in her shoulders. She avoided the people around her and headed straight to a nearby rock formation to enjoy the view. It was beautiful. On the horizon, the sun kissed the sea, and the reflection of light danced across the water like glittering fairies. It made her feel the closest to relaxed that she’d been for a long time. Even the tension in her body started to ease a little.

The intention behind moving to Victoria was to leave her ‘old’ life in Perth behind. It wasn’t easy, and sometimes weighing the pros against the cons simply didn’t convince her that it had been the right choice. Doubt filled her mind. She’d had friends and family in Perth. She was close with her mum and dad, and even though they’d understood, the need to distance herself from the past to create a new future had been too overwhelming. And that had meant to leave her hometown behind.

Tamara wrapped her cardigan closer and folded her arms across her chest. All she wanted was the pain to ease and the wonderful memories of her and Jason to return. She wished so much for the picture in her mind to go away…the image of Jason lying in the hospital with all the tubes stuck in him.

Her gaze drifted into the distance. Tonight had been the first time she left the house apart from going to work. Although she was aware it was something she’d avoided the last months, today there’d been a need for fresh air, for the buzz of people around her, and the sound of life. It’d been the first time she allowed herself to walk along the streets, and it’d been the first time that the accidental touch of a stranger hadn’t caused her to break down in an instant panic.

It was another small step towards the future.

Despite enjoying her evening stroll, though, her body was sore from the anxiety inside, from the tense muscles, and the constant fear. A tear escaped, falling onto her cheek from the relief and hope she felt inside. Hope of moving forward, hope that’d been hidden away for so long. She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself by inhaling the smell of the sea and listening to the screeching of the seagulls.

Tamara had done well moving across the country, finding a house and a job so quickly. She’d learnt to live from one day to the next. The lesson learnt this night was she might be ready to start taking little steps.

“Fancy seeing you here.”

Tamara shot around at the sound of the familiar voice and stood in one smooth motion. Staring at Oliver, she noticed how he waved to someone back at the pier.

“Are you following me?” she asked when he looked back at her.

He laughed softly without mirth. “Cupcake, this is one of the most popular places in a radius of about fifty k’s, and you’re sitting here on your own. You draw attention to yourself like a magnet.”

Looking around, she realised he was right. Suddenly that simple fact and the realisation she was so exposed, gave her a shiver. Uncomfortable with the situation, she wrapped her arms around her waist before meeting his gaze again.

“What?” she asked in a whisper.

He shrugged. “Trying to figure you out.”

His reply surprised her. Deep inside she enjoyed his attention, and for a moment, she suppressed her guilt that she’d only recently lost her husband…yet she was intrigued and possibly surprised as well, as to why he wanted to
figure her out
.

“Why?”

Shoving his hands in his pockets, Oliver rocked back on his heels. He lifted one shoulder in a shrug. “Perhaps I like you against my better judgment.” A smile crossed his lips, and he shook his head in what seemed a bit of amusement. “Or maybe if I figured you out, I’d like you more.”

“More?” she asked.

He laughed. “I know. It sounds impossible. But, hey, I’ve always liked a challenge.”

Gone was the moment when she’d enjoyed his attention, replaced by a building irritation in her chest. She took a minute to get it under control. With raised eyebrows, she asked calmly, “A challenge? I had no idea I was
a challenge
.”

The man from the pier joined them, and Tamara was grateful for the subject to be diverted. Still trying to calm her frustration, she took another deep breath.

“This is Markus. A friend of mine.”

She closed her eyes momentarily, preparing herself for more chit chat. This evening had suddenly become out of control, and the moment of guilt when she’d enjoyed their little conversation had long gone.

Tamara looked up at his friend Markus. It didn’t surprise her that he was as good looking as Oliver. Even in the evening darkness she noticed his blue eyes. Markus had the same athletic physique as Oliver. His blond hair was cut short, but it had a small wave in it, which gave him a mischievous look. More so with the constant smile on his face.

Markus held out his hand. “Nice meeting you.”

She never replied, though, simply turned, and walked away. She didn’t owe them anything, especially not her time.
Challenge?
She wasn’t cut out for chit chat, and she certainly wasn’t his
challenge.

Looking ahead, she stared into the distance, watching people moving along, laughing and enjoying their evening. The sudden guilty conscience that rose within her didn’t surprise her, but what did was the pang of regret. She stopped and replayed the moment in her head. The panic combined with her frustration and messy feelings for Oliver had been at such a high level, it’d been an instinctive reaction to walk away. She sighed as she stared at her feet. No, she didn’t owe them anything, but she did owe her parents to apply the good manners she’d been taught. Closing her eyes, she let the breeze caress her face before turning around. Some things had nothing to do with whether she liked it or not, but with the fact that they are right or wrong. And she’d been wrong.

***

Oliver’s jaw grew tight as he stared after her.

Markus chuckled. “Your charm doesn’t seem to work on her. What’s her problem?”

Oliver looked at his friend and shrugged, when out of the corner of his eye he noticed Tamara stopped. Head nearly on her chest and raking her hands through her long hair, she seemed to contemplate something. He hadn’t lied when he’d told her he was trying to figure her out, but he admitted the word
challenge
had been the wrong choice. The challenge wasn’t her per se, but figuring out what made her so jumpy. Still watching her, he hoped to get another chance to explain his unfortunate choice of words.

“I have no idea why she’s so fucked up, but we might find out,” he said quietly as he nodded towards her.

Tamara had turned around and come back. She held out her hand towards Markus and said, “I do apologise, Markus.” Then she took a deep breath before she continued. “The last year has been a bit rough, to say the least, but I suppose it’s no excuse for my bad behaviour. My name is Tamara. I work at the A-Stadium, where—” She pointed towards Oliver. “Where your friend does his training every week.”

Markus’ lips tugged into a grin as he followed her finger to Oliver. Then he met her eyes. “Nice meeting you, Tamara. Wanna join us for a drink?”

“Hell no, she doesn’t,” Oliver interrupted before he could actually think about it.

He had no idea what was happening right there in front of him. Not believing what he was seeing or even hearing, he shot his friend a glare that said
back off.

Tamara and Markus both stared at him, and he shrugged his shoulder. “What?”

Markus lifted an eyebrow. “I seem to be missing something here.”

Tamara placed a hand on his arm. “It’s okay. I’ve been…let’s say…” She hesitated.

“A bitch?” Oliver helped, but he regretted it straight away.

“I certainly have not!” she retorted before he could retract his words. Markus had offered him the perfect chance to spend more time with her, and here he was behaving like an idiot. He tried to shake off this odd reaction inside him.

“Challenge might have been the wrong word,” he finally said.

She smiled at him and removed her hand from Markus’ arm. “Perhaps another time, but thanks for the invite. Do you play baseball?”

Markus shook his head. “Nope. Soccer.”

Then she turned and walked off.

Again.

Hands on hips, Oliver watched her making her way to the pier. “Can you believe this woman?” When he didn’t get a reply, he looked at his friend. Markus was watching her as well, but with a love-struck smile on his face.

“Back off, mate. She’s trouble!”

Markus snorted. “You’re an ass. Just because she doesn’t fall for your charm, she’s trouble?”

That was one reason, all right, but the other reason was her behaviour the other day. The panic in her eyes, the same panic he thought he’d seen on her face when Markus had held out his hand as he’d introduced himself. Not to mention his coach’s stern warning to stay away from her.

So what had made her come back?

Was it really Markus?

Frowning, he shook his head. “No, that’s not it,” he finally replied. “But you should’ve seen her eyes last week,” he said more to himself than to Markus.

“Oh, I saw them just then,” his friend replied with a little chuckle.

“You’re such an ass, man.”

“What? You said, I should’ve seen her eyes. I did. They’re beautiful. I mean like…”

But he never finished his sentence, and as Oliver looked after Tamara, the sudden silence, broken only by the sound of the waves of Port Phillip Bay, gave him a shiver.

“What did you do to her?” Markus asked suddenly.

He shrugged, not willing to admit to his friend that she occupied his mind far more that he liked. “She’s screwed, mate. Coach Becker told me she’s off limits, but man, I tell ya, she’s screwed.”

They started walking back towards the pier. “I ran into her the other day in the parking lot, and she couldn’t find her keys. They were in her pocket. When I pointed at the keys, her whole body jerked.”

Markus raised an eyebrow. “Apparently you have that effect on women.”

Oliver choked back a laugh. “I do, but, hey, that wasn’t my touch, that was fear, mate.”

And again, the moment when Markus held out his hand rushed through his mind. Her eyes wide open for that split second before she’d turned and left.

His friend nodded towards Tamara in the distance as they watched her trying not to walk too close to other people.

“I think I can see what you mean.” Patting Oliver’s shoulder, he asked, “How are you going with the girl from the other weekend?”

He shook his head. “Don’t remind me. I have a feeling she expected baseball to be a lucrative sport. Once she found out it isn’t, she was gone.”

Markus laughed, but Oliver noticed his friend was still staring at Tamara.

“You’re quite smitten with her, aren’t you?” he said.

Markus shook his head. “Nope. Intrigued, but not smitten.”

Oliver was, though. And it irked him. She wasn’t his type. His type of woman was drawn to him, was attracted to him, and looked sensational. Tamara was different. Yes, she looked good, and as he quickly stole another quick look, he admitted she had a nice behind as well. Yet somehow, there was something about her he could not place. Something about her grabbed him. It confused the hell out of him to find himself drawn to her.

Shaking his head, he followed Markus to the pub across the road, still wondering whether it was because his coach not only asked him to stay away from her, but also told him she was
off limits
.

Off limits?

They weren’t words he was familiar with. He’d asked why and the simple answer was
she had a hell of a year.
He didn’t get any more details.

Off limits his ass.

“Mate, I need to do something. Ty will be here in a sec. I’ll catch up with you tomorrow.”

Not waiting for a reply, he left Markus standing at the door. There was something he had to do.