Letting Go of Us (Anchored Hearts Vol. 3) (28 page)

When I walked down to the
garage and hopped in my SUV, I had no idea that I’d run into James
and Smith in the garage. Thank God I had. After all the chaos that
came, I was second guessing my decision to leave town. I needed to
decide if I was going to hop on that plane home or if I was going
to stay.

The next morning I rolled
over and saw her naked body, a curvier and more voluptuous one than
from the previous morning. Her hair was a bit longer, darker and
was fanned out behind her. It all made no difference to me, I
wasn’t picky. She was asleep. She and I had started making a habit
of warming each other’s bed, long before I cared to admit, and she
understood it was casual. Hell, it’d been her idea. We’d left the
hospital together after awaiting news on James, though no one else
knew and we both wanted to keep it that way.

I had to visit the
hospital to see how everyone was holding up before I made my
decision. At least we were all alive, barely. Well, not
everyone
was alive, but
I didn’t give a shit about his, hopefully, dead ass. I contacted
Smith on my way home and he had confirmed that the body had been
pulled out of the water overnight. Dan was dead.

At Cassidy’s insistence, we
hadn’t contacted Cal and Jane. She wanted them to enjoy their
honeymoon since it was only a weekend retreat up at the cabin.
They’d left before everything went to shit and they’d be home on
Monday, which was the next day. I had a decision to make. Stay or
go. I sat in the hospital lobby later that morning, waiting for
Smith while I reflected on the previous evening.

We were in the lobby
waiting for word. Smith, J.J. and Cassidy walked in and we all grew
silent. Melissa, Lena, Anthony, Frank, Annie, Ryan, Delaney, Jane’s
parents and myself all stood or sat in our various places in the
room as J.J. filled us in.

“
He’s awake. His memory is
a little off right now, but the doctor’s think he’ll make a full
recovery.”

J.J. continued answering
questions and I got the sense he was being vague. Smith had his arm
around Cassidy and she wouldn’t make eye contact with anyone. I had
a feeling something more severe was going on, but they didn’t want
to disclose it just yet.

Melissa came forward,
“Cassidy, you look exhausted.”

“
She’s right. You’ve had
one hell of a day.” Delaney seconded Melissa’s words.

“
I, yes, but…Lena, did you
get a hold of my dad?” Cassidy looked to Lena who nodded. “Is he
coming down?”

“
He should be here at any
moment.”

Just as Lena finished her
statement, Mr. Charles walked into the lobby. Cassidy ran to him
and he checked her over as he held her. She was crying into his
chest as he pulled her to a corner of the room, Lisa walked in a
few moments later.

J.J. got our attention and
thanked everyone for coming. “Please give James some time and
privacy. Please check with Smith, myself or Cassidy before you pay
him a visit.” We all agreed and began heading our separate
ways.

I walked to my SUV and she
was standing there waiting for me. We didn’t have to exchange
words. I just nodded and she followed me in her car as we headed
back to my place. It was one weekend I knew I wanted to forget and
I’m sure she did, too.

Smith gripped my shoulder
and pulled me from my thoughts. Shaking hands, he reiterated that
Dan’s body had been pulled from the lake and his body was at the
coroner’s office. I’d never been so relieved to hear that someone
was dead.

“
Don’t you have a plane to
catch?”

I looked to Smith, “That’s
what I’m trying to decide. Did he find a replacement for
me?”

“
Nope. He was planning to
take it on himself. Before, all this.”

Sighing, I had my answer.
“Alright. I’ll cancel my flight. I’m not sure how long I’ll stay,
but I’ll keep things running so the projects are on schedule until
he’s back to work.”

“
It’s worse than that.” I
narrowed my eyes at Smith, as he confided in me. “You can’t say
anything. He has amnesia. He’s thinks it’s fucking
2011.”

“
Jesus.”

We talked a while longer
and I knew I had to stay. We shook hands again before I left. I
pulled out my phone and dialed.

“
Hey Mom. Yeah, I’m not
coming home just yet.”

~ CASSIDY ~

I was in the hallway with
J.J and the doctor. I couldn’t comprehend anything he was telling
me. The only thing I knew was that James didn’t know who I was.
Devastated was an understatement to how I felt. Dan was finally
gone—I hoped—and everything had been falling into place.

“
Mrs. Benedict?” I jerked
my head to the doctor as he said my name again. “Give him time.
Sometimes these things take time. Don’t put too much on him too
soon.”

Nodding, I complied as J.J.
rubbed my back. “Don’t worry dear. He’ll remember.”

“
I hope so.” The doctor
headed back in to see James as I murmured to J.J., “You heard him.
He never planned on getting married.”

“
He’s a silly boy. Don’t
listen to him.”

Smith came out of the room
followed by the doctor. “He’s hungry.” Looking to me he suggested,
“Why don’t you go to the cafeteria and get him some of his favorite
foods? It might help.” We all agreed and the doctor walked
away.

“
I don’t want anyone to
know just yet. He’s fine and that’s all they need to know for now.”
Smith and J.J. agreed.

“
I’ll wait here while you
and Smith go get him some food. We can talk to everyone
together.”

“
Ok.”

When I was in line getting
food for James, Smith got a phone call. He looked to me as he gave
generic answers that didn’t tip me off to anything. He paid for the
food and took the tray from me as we headed back to the
elevator.

“
I don’t know how to do
this.”

“
How to do
what?”

I looked to him, “Pretend I
don’t know him.” I sniffed, “It’s not fair. After
everything…”

He nodded and sighed, “They
just pulled his body from the lake. He’s dead.”

A weight was lifted from me
and immediately replaced with another. “And James has no idea.”
Then it hit me. “Oh God.”

“
What is it?”

“
Smith, he has to
remember. How far back does he remember?”

“
I, he thinks it’s
2011.”

My gut wrenched as I
started crying. “His mom! He thinks she’s still alive.” The doors
opened and we stepped outside and into another hallway. He set the
tray down and pulled me to him. “I can’t do this,
Smith.”

“
Shh, yes you can. Just
one day at a time. All you have to do is go eat with him, not fill
him in on the last three years of his life.”

I knew he was right, but
every memory that was ingrained in my soul, James no longer had. It
hurt to breathe thinking about him suffering through all of that
again. If he asked about his mom how was I going to explain
it?

“
One day at a time,
Cassidy.”

I wiped my tears and took a
deep breath. “Ok.”

I walked into his room, set
the tray down, and we exchanged a few words. I was fidgeting and it
took everything I had not to throw myself in his arms when his hand
touched mine. I was so happy that he was alive and just wanted to
imbed myself in his arms. He had to ask me my name and it cut me
deep. After that the nurse came in and asked if I was staying, I
knew I had to get out of there. I left more abruptly than I had
intended to. Smith and J.J. walked with me to the lobby where our
friends and family awaited news.

I vaguely recall J.J.
filling everyone in, without telling them that James had amnesia.
When my Dad walked in I rushed over to him. He was the only other
man who could make me feel better. I filled him in quietly as he
shed some tears of his own. Next thing I knew, everyone seemed to
be gone except for the three of us, and J.J., Smith and
Delaney.

“
Has anyone called Cal and
Jane?” Lisa asked and we all shook our heads.

“
Please don’t. James is
alive. Let them enjoy their honeymoon.” Reluctantly they all agreed
and J.J. confirmed that Bev hadn’t called Jane either.

“
Cassidy, can Lisa and I
take you home.”

“
Yes, but I don’t have my
car or keys to get in.”

“
Here.” Smith pulled out
some keys and handed me one. “It’s for your place.” I nodded,
knowing he wouldn’t need it anymore, I grabbed on to it. “I’ll try
to get your car back to you tonight or in the morning. I need to
find out if the cops impounded it or not.”

“
Thank you,
Smith.”

“
Mr. and Mrs. Charles, I
can put you up at the hotel if you like.”

“
I don’t want her to be
alone. We’ll make due. Thank you.” My dad turned down the offer and
we headed out.

I fell asleep in my dad’s
truck on the way home. It’d been one hell of a long day. The sun
was already starting it’s decent in the summer sky when we walked
in my front door. I missed the sound of Chessa’s bell greeting me
and started crying.

I filled Lisa and my dad in
on what had happened as they consoled me. They walked me up the
stairs and into my room. Most everything was in order, but a chill
ran over me. Just that morning I’d been Dan’s captive in that room.
My only comfort was knowing he was dead. Now I just had to deal
with the memories.

“
Why don’t you take a
bath, dear? I’ll make you some tea.”

I agreed as Lisa and my Dad
started picking up the broken pieces of my table lamp and the
turned over chair. I pulled some clothes out of a drawer and walked
into my bathroom, closing the door. I stood there for several
minutes. I didn’t have the energy to take a bath, though I knew I
needed one. Changing my clothes, I discarded the scrubs and
re-entered my bedroom. The mess was gone. I crawled into bed and I
think I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

~<>~<>~<>~

I woke to the smell of
bacon and pancakes. Bacon. Smith had told me that they found the
note, but not before he figured out my car had left the hotel. I
needed to get to the hospital. I looked for my phone on my night
stand and remembered Dan had thrown it out the window. Now I needed
a new phone.

“
Ugh!”

Hitting the side of my bed
with my fists, I then climbed out of bed and into the shower. Once
I was dressed I headed downstairs where Dad and Lisa awaited. I ate
way too much, but I was famished! When I was close to finishing
there was a knock on the door. My Dad answered it and Smith walked
in.

“
Hey, I have your car.” I
walked over to him and took the keys. “These are James keys, we’ll
have to order another spare set, so don’t lose them.”

Smiling, I thanked him.
“You’re a lifesaver, literally.”

He just shrugged his
shoulders. “I took it upon myself and got you this too.” He handed
me a new cell phone. It was charged and seemed to have all my info
in it. “Good thing he’s overbearing and backed up all your
stuff.”

“
Right! Thank you. I was
dreading having to go replace it.” He said hello to my father and
Lisa and they asked if he’d heard anything new.

“
No. I haven’t heard
anything. I was planning to head up there now. You want a
ride?”

I looked to my dad and he
said, “We’ll probably head home soon. Its ok, you go ahead. We’ll
lock up here.”

“
Ok. I’ll follow you so
you don’t have to cart me around.” I headed to the door and
realized, “Shit, I don’t have my license or anything. Guess I know
what I’m doing tomorrow.”

“
I can still drive you.
I’ll check and see if your purse was in the car
wreckage.”

“
No, wait, hang on. I
think it’s here.” I ran back upstairs and found my purse on my
dresser, license inside. “Got it!”

I hugged my dad and Lisa
and told them I’d stay in touch with any update. Dad didn’t want to
overwhelm James and I understood. Smith followed behind me as I
pulled out the drive. I started to wonder how he got my car here
and his car, but knew he had plenty of resources at his disposal.
When we reached the intersection, the same one that Dan had flown
through the night before, I panicked.

I was stopped at the red
light, oblivious of when it turned green. Everything grew quiet as
the previous day’s events flashed through my mind. A tap came on my
window and I was sinking again, banging on the glass. Someone was
saying my name, but I couldn’t figure out from where. I looked to
my left and saw Smith, looking nervous. Shaking my head I saw the
honking cars driving around us and giving us dirty
looks.

I rolled down my window as
he asked, his voice full of concern, “Are you ok?”

“
Yeah, sorry. I don’t know
what happened.”

“
I can drive you. Pull
over to the side and you can ride with me.”

“
No, it’s ok.
Sorry.”