Life Rewired (Aspen Friends, Book 3) (13 page)

My face fell. Jeez, put that way, I was destined to be disappointed forever. Oh, that was her point. Well, shit.

Vivian could see the thoughts as they passed through my head. She managed to keep from looking smug when she said, “Want to talk about the l-word again?”

“Shut it.”

That pulled a laugh from her. “How is she feeling?”

“I’ve been working.” I have. Really. Way too busy to deal with Falyn and these convoluted feelings just yet.

Her brow rose, but she was polite enough not to grin. “You’re avoiding.”

“What would you do?”

“Not my sitch, darlin’. I knew I loved Natalie before we slept together.”

Wouldn’t that be nice? Still, Viv always had good advice. “In my sitch, what would you do?”

“She’s nice, she likes doing the same things you do, she’s got a job, she doesn’t seem to take much for granted, she thinks of your feelings before making a decision that affects you both, and she’s great in bed? Is there really a question?”

“Yes, dammit. She’s not my type.” I doubted she had a girly blouse or high heels anywhere in her closet. She’d probably never get scared enough to tuck her face against my chest when we watched a scary movie. And there was no way she’d get excited to the point of screeching about something I did for her. Girly, she is not, and that’s what I’d always wanted.

“But she was once, and she’s obviously rocked your view of types.”

“Like for real, though?” It was so hard to make sense of this. I’d been so certain I wanted one thing. Could I just walk away from that certainty? “You know I’ve been wanting to find someone all permanent like for a while now.”

“And you’re not sure if she’s the kind to go for that?”

I shrugged. That was the thing about buddies. Deep, emotional discussions about wants and dreams didn’t happen. “I don’t even know if she’s staying in town after she finishes your house.”

“What?” Her eyes popped wide. “Does she think she’s going to be fired?”

“No, she thinks that Nat took her on as a favor and won’t be able to maintain the workload to keep her on full-time. She’s not going to put Nat in that position.”

“Wow,” she repeated. It seemed like she wanted to say more, but she didn’t.

“So, yeah, I could be getting into something that might end sooner rather than later.”

She nodded her head and looked as grim as I felt. “Natalie will do everything to keep her on, but she might think the effort is too much and try to alleviate that for her friend.”

“That’s my thinking.”

“Well, Mol, I don’t know what to say.” She took a sip from her lemonade and gathered her thoughts. “I do know that this is the longest discussion we’ve ever had about someone you’re interested in, other than how to deal with J&B originally. And that says you think more of this than anything you’ve had in possibly ever. Am I right?”

“I had a talk with her about J&B, too.”

“Avoiding,” she accused.

“Mouth. Shut.” I brought my hand up and slammed my fingers down onto my thumb to emphasize my order. The gesture just made her smile wider.

“I’m right.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Good talk.” She grinned wide and long. “You never needed romance like I did. You want someone who’ll see you for who you are, not what they think you should be. Falyn seems like she’s got that right.”

Helps that she’s been my buddy and would know that particular pet peeve of mine. Just because I’m butch doesn’t mean I’m going to tend to every single whim of my girlfriend. Just because I’m butch doesn’t mean I don’t want someone to recognize that I like a little pampering, too. And just because I’m butch doesn’t mean I’m not vulnerable sometimes. Falyn does seem to get that.

Even if she isn’t my type.

She looked beautiful, not in the traditional sense, but beautiful nonetheless. Her hair would be considered short by most, but longer than mine. The natural wave didn’t push it off her forehead or form loose ripples like mine. Her wave added volume to her entire style. I’d never dated a woman without long hair before, but I sure liked the look of it now. Dark blond, too. Normally I preferred champagne blondes or honey blondes. Falyn’s was a shade shy of light brown, but the sunshine-infused, golden highlights snagged my gaze every time. Her hazel eyes weren’t the piercing blue I usually favored. But forget drowning in a sea of blue. Falyn’s brownish green hazel had the power to paralyze.

“Hey,” she said, stepping back to gesture me into her house.

“Hi.” I wanted to kiss her hello but knew that wasn’t a good idea.

“Molls,” Cole greeted from the couch where he, his brother, and Luis were fighting it out on some video game. Falyn’s cats were curled up in his and Luis’s laps, perfectly content to be jostled by their controller movements.

“Yo,” Curtis called.

“
Hola
,” Luis added.

Falyn hid a smile and nodded her head toward the kitchen.

“Fos, beer me, please?” Cole asked. “I’m in the middle of crushing these two.”

She chuckled and didn’t seem to mind grabbing beers for all of them. I had a feeling it was to keep them from wandering near us while we talked. Had the talk, I should say.

“Want a beer?” she asked me after placing three on the table and bringing over the open bag of chips.

I wanted to say yes, but beer had helped put us in this situation. Then again, beer might ease the tension a bit. “Thanks.”

“Guys, I’m stealing one of your beers.”

“Beer is communal. You know that,” Curtis said and immediately swore as someone pinned him with gunfire on screen.

“It’s not. They always pay for it,” she said to me.

“You rarely drink it. It’s communal. You buy us eggs and peanut butter.”

“Yuck,” I reacted to the combo.

“Not to eat together, Mol, jeez. You will die now!” he shouted at his brother.

“Lovely atmosphere,” I commented, actually happy to have the buffer tonight.

“They’re entertaining.”

“We’re like her TV,” Cole told me.

“Go back to your game, kids.” Falyn gripped the top of Cole’s head to turn it back to the screen.

“Kids,” Curtis snickered.

She shot me an exasperated look. “He doesn’t believe I’m forty-four.”

My eyebrows rose. I knew she was older, but I thought maybe a year or two at the most. Five seemed impossible. She didn’t look it. Not her face or her tight, hard body.

She handed over a beer and took a bottle of OJ out of the fridge. “Porch okay?” She led me out through the sliders to the chairs that Glory practically lived in before she moved to Lena’s next door. It looked like this was Falyn’s new spot.

After taking a seat, I sniffed involuntarily. I could smell smoke. Not heavy, just lingering, like maybe one of the guys smoked regularly and had recently been sitting out here. I glanced around and saw an ashtray on the deck next to Falyn’s chair. There was a single cigarette crushed inside.

“You don’t smoke?” I would have tasted that when I kissed her. I know I would have. It’s kind of a thing with me.

“Occasionally.”

That shocked me. I hadn’t tasted it. I’d only had a few beers that night. I didn’t think I was drunk. Was the whole experience a blur because I’d been inebriated? “Really?”

“Used to, once a week, but not for months now. I thought I had quit.”

My eyes cut to hers. Yeah, she was as twisted about this as I was. She’d quit and now she was smoking again, all because we’d gotten carried away the other night. “Think you’ll take it up again.”

She shrugged and glanced away. “How was your weekend?”

I didn’t hear any accusation in her question. It had been four days with only one call between us, but she didn’t sound upset about that. “Busy. The summer tours are taking longer and longer.”

“You like it better than the winter stuff, right?”

We’d already had this conversation, but we needed something to start us off. I nodded and took in a deep breath to let out and begin.

“Hey, guys,” Mei called out as she walked toward us from the house next door. I’d known her for years, but she didn’t often join our group of friends when we planned outdoor activities. Most of our contact was limited to when I made plans with her husband, Spencer, or her best friend, Glory.

“Mei,” I greeted. “Where’s the hubby? Doing mayor stuff?”

“He’ll be home soon. I was headed over to Glory’s.” Her finger gestured down the street.

“I saw her pull in about a half hour ago,” Falyn told her.

“Thanks. I’m going to catch her before dinner. See you on my way back.”

“See ya.” Falyn waved and focused on me. “They work together, live next to each other, and still see each other almost every night. Wouldn’t that get tiresome after a while?”

“I’d think so,” I confirmed. “Viv and I have been friends a long time, but I couldn’t work with her and live next to her every day.”

“Little too much,” she agreed.

Although, I could suddenly see that situation with Falyn. Maybe not the business part of it. I didn’t want to own a business, but the seeing her every day and living close by or together, yeah, that might work.

She flicked her green tinted hazels at me and let out an audible breath. “So…I’m not your type and you’re not mine. What next?”

A laugh escaped because she’d blurted what I’d been thinking. “I’ve been trying to figure it out.” For days now and I still didn’t know exactly how to feel.

“I meant what I said, you know. I had a good time.”

“Me, too.”

“It was unexpected.”

“Yes.”

“Nice, though.”

“Yes.”

“Say something other than ‘yes,’ will you?”

“Okay.” I laughed and she joined me.

“What would you like to do?”

“Don’t know.”

“Me, neither,” she said with a sigh, almost like she was disappointed. I was a little disappointed, too. I was hoping she’d have a clearer idea of what she wanted. Like tell me she wanted a relationship, or she thought it was a mistake and we should be friends, or she really wanted a relationship. Oops, said that already.

“I didn’t expect…” That it would be sensational. That I’d be rethinking what I thought would be great relationship material.

“Same here. Like I said before, I usually go for—”

“The pretty ones. Not that I’m not pretty,” I joked.

“Definitely,” she agreed with a smile. “But I didn’t have you in the potential g/f category, you know?”

“Same here. It’s kinda thrown me.”

Her soulful eyes watched me for a moment. “In a good way? Like you want to explore a friends with benes situation, or I’m freaked and really need to go back to watching a baseball game with my buddy way?”

Friends with benes? Now that I hadn’t considered. I already had too much emotionally going to be a booty call and not come out damaged at the end. Kinda hoped she did, too. “Never done that.”