Little Bird (The Tangled Series) (22 page)

“No. But I do think that’s irrelevant because you are interested.” When Savannah continued to stare at him, he said, “Look, it’s confusing for you and I know that. You’re proud of the fact that everything you have you’ve done for yourself and you should be. You’re strong and independent and I love that about you, I wouldn’t ever want to change that and I’ll be honest, I even like that you sometimes stand up to me. But my point is, I understand finding out you actually enjoy it when a man dominates you has you a little rattled. That’s natural.”

“So if I were willing to give this a try, what exactly would that mean?”

“All you have to worry about is pleasing me, Little Bird. I’ll take care of all the rest.”

“How 1950s. What am I supposed to get out of that?” Savannah scowled at him. Until this conversation she hadn’t realized what a sexist asshole he really was.

Lee surprised her when he chuckled and reached up to tweak the end of her nose before leaning close to whisper, “I didn’t mean it like that. Every inch of you already belongs to me, I own you. And you already want to please me. If you can just stop thinking so much and listen to what you feel, I think you already know what you get out of it.”

Lee was right, and the realization sent her reeling. Savannah felt breathless, her heart pounding. She closed her eyes, her palms flat on the table in front of her and she tried to steady herself. She didn’t want him to want her; she needed it. Lee made her feel safe, protected, cherished and the idea of surrendering to him didn’t make her feel weak as she’d first thought. In some ludicrous twist, it made her feel empowered. If she belonged to him, she could do anything. He would help her do anything. His strength became her strength. She had a professional job, hobbies and interests of her own, friends and family she cared about, and all of those things were important to her. But when it came to Lee, when it came to the part of her life he inhabited, at her very core she just wanted to belong to him.

Lee’s arm slid around her shoulders and her eyes fluttered open as he pulled her against his chest. Looking up at him, his handsome mouth curved in an encouraging smile, his hand squeezing her shoulder, she felt her heart slip. Her voice was quiet as she asked, “And what do you get out of it?”

Lee narrowed his eyes in thought, his fingers stroking her shoulder. “I like the control, of course, and the violence, the tears. That’s the cheap and easy answer.”

“Yeah, well, I want the expensive and hard answer.” Savannah arched a brow at him as she waited.

“I want to tear you apart, Little Bird. Strip away every layer of protection and armor you’ve built for yourself, until you are nothing but aching flesh and bone. I want to know you better than anyone else has ever, or will ever, know you. In your most vulnerable moments you’ll know that I am there, always. Your anchor, your rock, your protector. You’ll have my respect, my admiration, my love because you were brave enough to let me into the darkest parts of you that no one else has ever seen.”

Savannah gave him a sideways look. “Okay, that sounds sort of scary, too.”

Lee laughed and hugged her tight. “I’ve heard it said that what the Top gets out of the relationship is everything he wants; what the bottom gets is, regrettably, just the Top. But that’s all wrong. When it’s working right, we both get what we want and need, just like in a perfectly vanilla relationship. What’s different is how we go about getting it, because in this scenario I’m responsible for all of it, for both of us. It’s my job to make sure you get what you need and to tell you exactly what I need; your job is just to do what I tell you. If it’s not working for both of us then I’m not doing my job.”

After all this emotionally tense conversation, Savannah suddenly felt overwhelmed by her need to be alone with him. The things he’d said did frighten her a little, but she trusted him and he was right: she wanted it even if it did scare her. But she didn’t know how to put that into words, so instead she wanted to go home and show him. “Levon, take me home and make love to me.”

“No. I’m going to take you home and fuck you until you call me Master, Little Bird.”

Savannah shivered, and Lee grinned as he added, “In a minute. I wasn’t quite done asking questions when we got off on this little tangent. How did you ever wind up with those piercings when Douchebag and the four dimwits were so…boring?”

“Boring seems a little harsh.” Savannah tried to concentrate on the conversation when all she really wanted to think about was what would happen when they got back to her apartment.

“Does it? I think I pretty well understand how it usually went for you. He’d climb on top of you, stick his dick between your legs, maybe squeeze your tit a little and give you a clumsy kiss, and then it was all over before you’d even had the chance to think about an orgasm, let alone have one. I’ve seen you touch yourself, you know what it takes to get yourself off, but you never told them because you were too shy and didn’t have the courage to give them any direction. You were submissive, even to a bunch of idiots who didn’t know what to do with you. The only thing I can’t figure out is where you got the piercings.”

Savannah stared at him, flabbergasted. Lee’s description of her prior sex life was startlingly close to the reality. “Well, when you put it that way it does sound rather boring. And I didn’t ever come, by the way. I mean, a couple of them cared enough to get me off with their hands or their mouth. But I never came from the actual fucking. Close with one of the one-night stands, though. He was sort of…”

Lee’s fingers were digging into her shoulder as he interrupted her. “Are you telling me I was the first one who made you come with his dick?” When Savannah nodded, blushing, Lee gritted his teeth. “Go on. Finish telling me about the piercings.”

Savannah took a deep breath, trying to remember what she’d been saying. “The short version of the story is I went with one of my friends when she went to get them done. She chickened out when she saw the needle and said she’d only do it if I did it first. So, I did. I thought it might make sex better.”

“And, did it make sex better, Little Bird?” That predatory look was back again, the hawk circling his prey.

“I don’t know. You’re the first since I had them done, and sex with you would have been better even without them. So it’s not really a fair comparison.”

Lee stood up abruptly, opening his wallet and tossing several bills on the table. Picking up their shopping bags with his left hand, he leaned over and grabbed her wrist with his right hand, hauling her across the booth, his voice gruff. “Time to go.”

Lee practically dragged her the few blocks back to her apartment, his stride brisk. Savannah could only scramble after him. She tried to talk to him and asked him to slow down, but he didn’t respond, silently pulling her along.

When they reached her apartment, he stood at the door behind her as she unlocked it, his hands gripping her hips as he pressed his erection against her bottom. Savannah gasped, fumbling with her keys. His warm breath was a caress on her neck when he hissed behind her, “Hurry up, Savannah, or I’m going to lift your skirt and fuck you right here. What do you think your neighbors would say about that?”

With a steadying breath, Savannah managed to get the door unlocked. Lee reached around her, pushing it open and shoving her inside. He led her to the bed, his voice harsh as he said, “Pull your skirt up and bend over, put your hands and forehead on the bed. Spread your legs as wide as you can. I want that breath-taking ass of yours in the air.”

Savannah bent over the bed as he instructed. She could hear Lee behind her rummaging through his bags.

“Give me your hands.” She extended her arms behind her, trying to balance on her forehead. Lee grabbed her wrists, securing them behind her back with a pair of cuffs. That done, he stepped back and she wondered what he would do next.

Savannah’s only warning she was about to be struck was the whistle in the air just before the crop landed on her ass. Savannah screamed and Lee chuckled behind her, bringing the crop down on her again. The second hit was followed by three more in a fast flurry, her ass burning as she bit the blankets on her bed and struggled not to fall over.

“Do you know why I’m hitting you?” Lee had one hand on her ass, roughly squeezing her tender skin.

“No.” She sobbed, pushing her bottom toward him even as his calloused fingers pinched and grabbed at her, making her whimper.

“I told you that I would punish you for insisting I tell you how many women I’d been with.”

“Finding out you’ve fucked more than a hundred women was punishment enough.” Savannah snorted and tried to control her tears.

The only response she received was the whistle of the crop in the air as he brought it down on her ass three more times in quick succession. Savannah howled in agony as it bit into her delicate flesh.

“Any other smart comments you’d like to make?”

Savannah shook her head and breathed a sigh of relief when she heard the crop fall to the floor. Lee had both hands on her ass, massaging and cupping the inflamed skin, and she moaned through her tears, her hips rocking against his palms.

“I’m the first man to play with those sexy piercings. I’m the first man to spank you and the first man to make you come during penetration. I’m going to be the first man to fuck your tight little asshole.” She made a muffled squeak against the bed and Lee laughed, his hands still rubbing her bottom. “I haven’t been a first anything for a woman in a really long fucking time. I kind of like it. Anything else I’m forgetting?”

“Condom.” Savannah turned her head, trying to get her face clear of the blankets so he’d hear her.

“It’s not time for that yet, sweetheart, but I won’t forget.” Lee was evidently amused by what he thought had been a helpful reminder.

Savannah shook her head with agitation, pissed she couldn’t seem to keep the blankets out of her face. “That’s not what I meant. I’ve never had sex without a condom.”

Lee went still behind her, his fingers digging into her flesh, his voice deep and gravelly. “Fucking hell.”

Lee was quiet for a long time and Savannah was about to ask him to uncuff her when he finally spoke.

“Savannah, I understand what I’m about to say makes me a really big asshole but I’m going to say it anyway and I expect you to do it. If not because I asked you to, then because it’s for your own fucking good.” Lee paused, waiting for her to say something but she didn’t bother, too tired of trying to keep the blankets out of her mouth. “First thing Monday morning you’re going to call your doctor and make an appointment to get on birth control. I don’t fucking care what kind, just get on something. Got it?”

“Why?” Savannah didn’t really mind, she’d already thought about that anyway but she was curious about what was going on in his head.

Lee sighed and reached over her back, unfastening the cuffs. He massaged each wrist for a second before releasing them and sitting down on her bed, his back against her headboard, and pulling her into his lap.

“Sweetheart, telling me that no man has ever come inside you before is sort of like balancing a bacon double cheeseburger on a dog’s nose, leaving it there indefinitely and expecting the dog not to eat it. Maybe some dogs can pull that off but I ain’t that dog.” Lee laughed, stroking her arm as he held her against him.

“I don’t get it. I mean, I know what you said earlier, that it was already difficult. And I appreciate that you made yourself do it, and never complained about it. But I don’t get why you seem kind of freaked out now. What’s the big deal?”

Lee didn’t say anything. He just sat there with his head against the headboard and his eyes closed, lazily stroking her arm. Savannah poked his chest. “Have you slipped into a stress induced coma or something?”

Lee laughed and opened one eye. “No.”

“Oh.” He’d closed his eye again and Savannah sat there for a minute, impatiently waiting for him to say something else. Eventually she got tired of waiting. “I want you to know I’d already thought about getting on the pill. I mean, before today. So I don’t think you’re an asshole or anything because you think I should do that. I agree; I should.”

“Okay, sweetheart. That’s good.”

Lee hadn’t opened his eyes and she had the sneaking suspicion he wasn’t really listening to her but she forged ahead. “The reason I’d never done it before is because with Douchebag, being that he was my first and all, I was super paranoid about getting pregnant. I mean, I trust science and all but it still freaked me out, the idea of not using a condom and in hindsight, thank god it did. After Douchebag it’s been sporadic and casual so I didn’t see the point. But we’ve been having sex so much I had already thought that I should probably do that.”

“I’m glad.”

Savannah grumbled under her breath and poked his chest again. “Are you even listening to me?”

Lee opened his eyes and smiled. “You weren’t on the pill with Douchebag because he was a douchebag. You weren’t after that because things were sporadic. You’d already thought about it with me so I’m not an asshole. Does that pretty well cover it?”

“Yes.” Savannah nodded, satisfied he’d been listening after all. She waited for him to say more but he didn’t, instead just giving her an amused look. “So I guess that whole fuck me until I call you Master thing isn’t happening now, huh?”

“Nope.”

“You aren’t going to make me wait until after I get on something are you?” Savannah wrinkled her nose and frowned. The idea of spending a sexless weekend with him was unappealing and, in her opinion, unrealistic anyway.

“Oh, no, but you do have to wait until I can get the caveman in my head to shut the fuck up.”

Savannah laughed and laid her head on his shoulder. “What’s he saying?”

“Hmm, let’s see.” Lee paused and she thought he was just going to lapse into silence again but after a minute he did go on, squeezing her tight against his chest. “Mine! Mine! Mine!”

“Huh?” Savannah raised her head again to look at him. What the hell was that supposed to mean?