Living on the Edge (20 page)

Two weeks after Tanner left

M
adison gripped the phone. “Angel, you're not cooperating.”

“I know, dollface. Cooperation isn't in my job description. I gave you the phone number so if you still want to talk to him in six months, you can find him. That's it. By my watch, we're talking fourteen days. Go. Live your life.”

She gritted her teeth in impatience. “Will you tell him I called.”

“Probably not.”

“You're the most infuriating man.”

“So I've heard. Anything else?”

“Christopher's dead.”

“Yeah. We got that news flash, too. Inside job. Killed in his cell in jail. We figure it was his friends in the Mafia. They didn't like him making things messy. So you're free of him. That's good.”

“I know. I can even feel sorry for him—now that he can't threaten me anymore.”

“You're more generous than he deserves. I'm hanging up now.”

“Angel, wait. Tell him…tell him I miss him.”

“Not a chance.”

He disconnected the phone.

Madison replaced the receiver and stared out of her new office window. She'd accepted a job as a director at Adams Electronics while continuing to work a couple of afternoons a week at her charity. She wanted to keep in touch with the children she'd already helped, but she couldn't turn down the chance to work with her father. Not after all the time they'd lost.

Slowly her life had returned to normal. The only thing missing was Tanner. She ached for him. Five months and two weeks, she told herself. Time would pass and then he would have to believe her.

Five weeks after Tanner left

“Angel, I have to talk to him.”

“Tell me why.”

“I can't.”

“You won't,” the man said. “Are you sick?”

“No.”

“Dying?”

She glanced at the plastic stick in front of her—the one clearly indicating she was pregnant—and grinned. “Never more healthy in my life. That's not the point.”

“That's exactly the point. Give it up, Madison.”

“I can't. I love him. You really have to have him get in touch with me. This is important. Seriously, life-changing important.”

“Which means what?”

She leaned back in her sofa. “That you should get him to come see me. I mean it, Angel. When he finds out what I have to tell him, he'll be really grateful.”

“Like I believe that. The answer is no. Stop calling me. Every week we go through this and every week I tell you it's not gonna happen.”

She was too happy to be angry with Angel or frustrated by Tanner's stubbornness. She was having his baby. A child of their own.

“We have a tradition now,” she said. “When Tanner finally comes to his senses, you're going to miss me.”

“Sure. Like lice. Listen, dollface—”

“Angel, it's a new century. You have to stop calling women ‘dollface.'”

“It's my trademark.”

“It's annoying.”

“Good. Now are you going to leave me alone?”

“Nope. He matters too much. I'll phone you next week.”

“If it's important to you.”

“It is. Oh, Angel? Do you tell him I call?”

She asked the question every week and every week he'd told her no. This time he paused.

“Sometimes.”

“Does he say anything?” she asked cautiously.

“No, Madison. He doesn't say anything.”

Three months and one week after Tanner left

The good news was the morning sickness had pretty much faded and Madison had actual cleavage for the first time in her life. The even better news was that she and the baby were perfectly healthy and growing just as they should.

The bad news was she missed Tanner with a desperation that only deepened with each passing day.

It was nearly nine when she picked up the portable phone to make her weekly call to Angel. She'd gotten in the habit of calling him at night, so that when they finished she could curl up in bed and pretend Tanner had heard every word. That he cared about her and that it was killing him to be so far away from her.

At what point did she let go? she wondered. Tanner had been concerned that her feelings weren't real, that they were only about circumstances. How could she prove otherwise to a man who refused to speak with her or see her? Was he really trying to give her the space he thought she needed or did he not care about her? Was her love one-sided?

Six months, she told herself. She would give him the six months he'd offered her. On that date, she would call for the last time. She would also tell Angel about the baby. She had hoped to tell Tanner herself, but if he refused to talk to her, there was little she could do.

“But that's nearly three months away,” she told herself as she dialed the now-familiar number.

Angel picked up on the second ring. “You're consistent,” he said by way of greeting. “I'll give you that.”

“Thank you.”

“Feeling okay?”

“I'm fine. Eating, sleeping, all the usual bodily functions.”

“Good.”

She was also finally showing. Her tummy was round, her body lush…or almost lush. How she wanted to share this with Tanner. She wanted him to be a part of her life, of their child's life. But if he didn't want that…

“Is he being stubborn or does he really not care?” she asked.

“Dammit, Madison.”

“I want to know. This is hard for me, Angel. I miss him. My feelings aren't going away. You and I both know that—why can't he?”

“You know the rules,” he reminded her.

“Screw the rules. I love him. If he were here right now, I'd tell him that. I'd tell him that I miss him in my life. That he's the best man I've ever known.”

“He'd tell you you need to get out more.”

“Maybe.” She smiled. “How are you?”

“What?”

“We always talk about me and Tanner. What's going on with you? Are you seeing anyone?”

“I'm not talking about my personal life with you.”

“Why not? I'm a good listener and I can give you the female perspective.”

“I don't need it.”

“Always the tough guy,” she teased. “Come on. Who is she? A model? I can see you with a model. Or maybe a schoolteacher. A single mom?”

He growled, which made her laugh.

“Come on, Angel. Humor me. We have another three months to go.”

“You're really going to hang on that long?”

“Yes. After six months I'll stop calling, but I won't stop loving him.”

“Swear?”

She heard the word, but it hadn't come from the telephone. Instead the sound had come from the doorway of her bedroom.

Madison let the phone drop onto the comforter as she turned and saw Tanner standing in the darkness. She couldn't see the details of his features, but she recognized him.

Too stunned to speak, she could only watch as he crossed to the bed and picked up the phone. He turned it off before tossing it back on the mattress, then crouching in front of her.

“Are you sure?” he asked, his voice low and thick.

The light from her nightstand illuminated his features. He was gaunt, with circles under his eyes. He looked as if he'd been to hell and lived to tell the tale.

“What happened?” she asked as she touched his cheek. “Were you sick?”

“I missed you. I took every dangerous assignment I could and still I couldn't forget you. You're a part of me—under my skin, in my bones. I breathe you.” He
took her hand in his and squeezed her fingers. “Madison, are you telling the truth? Do you really love me? Because if you don't, I can't make it. You're my world. This is killing me.”

She leaned forward and pulled him close. Then he was on the bed and they were kissing as if they had a lifetime to make up for.

“Of course I love you,” she whispered as she pressed her mouth against his lips, his cheeks, his chin. “I've been calling every week, trying to tell you.”

“I know. Angel taped the calls and forwarded them to me. I couldn't stand listening to them and I couldn't stop playing them over and over. I needed it all to be true, even as I told myself it couldn't be.”

“Stubborn man,” she said contentedly. “Do you believe me now?”

“I have to. I need to be with you.” He touched her face. “You got rid of the scar.”

“It seemed the right thing to do. There's still a faint mark, but I don't need the reminder anymore.”

He stared into her eyes. “I love you, Madison. I don't deserve you and you can do a hell of a lot better than me, but I still love you. Marry me. I'll spend the rest of my life taking care of you. I love you with every part of myself. For always.”

The happiness filling her was as tangible as the blood in her body. “How do you feel about children?” she asked.

He blinked at her. “I like kids. I want to have kids with you.”

“Good.”

She took his hand and slid it under the thick com
forter to her stomach. He moved over the roundness of her belly, then stared at her.

“You're pregnant?”

She nodded. “I wanted to tell you before, but you weren't taking my calls.”

He swore under his breath. “That's what you had to tell me a few weeks ago. The thing you said was important.”

“Exactly. I didn't want to have that first emotional exchange with Angel. I mean I like the guy and all, but he's not my type. I seem to be a one-man woman. You're stuck with me, big guy. Guess you're going to have to get used to it.”

Tanner didn't know what combination of events had brought him to this moment or why Madison cared about him. But here he was with her, with a baby on the way and a future filled with promise.

He began to laugh. She joined in and they clung to each other.

“I'm happy about the baby,” he said.

She grinned. “I got that. I'm happy, too. Now we just need a dog.”

“And a house.”

“Good idea,” she said.

“I need a less dangerous job.”

“I agree.”

He kissed her, then smiled. “I proposed.”

“Yes, you did.”

“You didn't answer.”

“Oh. Sorry. I meant to.” She pulled him close. “Yes, I'll marry you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“Living happily ever after.”

“Do you think that's likely?”

He stared into her eyes and saw all the happy days ahead. “Absolutely.”