Lonely This Christmas (5 page)

The moment Judy had closed her front door she kicked off her shoes, stretched out her toes, and sighed. The hours of wandering around the shops had caused her feet to swell dramatically and the relief of removing her cramped shoes was immense.

Heading up the staircase with shopping bags in hand, she immediately entered Sophie’s bedroom. Of course the bedroom would have to be cleared once Sophie confirmed that she was definitely coming home for Christmas, but for now it served as a storage place for Judy’s new found purchases. Removing the dress from the large boutique bag, Judy left the dress on its hanger in its protective cellophane wrapping, and hung it up on one of the hooks attached to the back of the bedroom door. She took a step back and smiled, silently admiring her extravagance. Rarely did she spend money so freely these days, but it felt quite liberating to buy something simply because she wanted it.

As Judy straightened up her other packages on the bed, she smoothed out the candy pink bed cover. Then she spotted Sophie’s cuddly pink rabbit, ‘
Floppsy’. Reaching for it she lifted it to her nose. Inhaling deeply there was the familiar hint of Sophie’s favorite perfume. Judy had bought the rabbit shortly after Bruce’s death. The soft furry stuffed animal had seemed to comfort the heartbroken teenager, and whenever there was emotional turmoil ‘Floppsy’ was always there to console her. Although she’d left him behind when she went off to University, he was the first thing she looked for when she arrived home for the holidays.

Judy remembered cuddling her small teddy that Ian had bought her, when she was heartbroken. She had toyed with the idea of tossing the teddy in the trash after Ian had gone, seeing as it was Ian who had caused her broken heart. Judy had torn the Valentine’s card she’d treasured into shreds, but she couldn’t bring herself to part with her favorite cuddly toy.

On a sudden whim, Judy pulled down the step ladder on the landing and climbed quickly into the loft. She knew exactly where to look, and moments later she came back down the step ladder clutching a small brown teddy bear. The artificial rose was faded with age and it was more of a dusky pink rather than the deep red it once was, but to her it still carried the same sentiment as it had all those years ago.

Entering her own bedroom Judy lay on the bed clutching the teddy to her heart, and recalled the day that she was given the present.

It was a crisp frosty February evening in 1975, and it was Valentine’s Day. Ian had already told Judy that he had a surprise for her, when they had left each other outside the school in the afternoon. He promised to call at her house sometime that evening, and she eagerly watched from her bedroom window as the frost grew thicker and the night grew darker. She was just about to give up on him when she spied him hurrying to her door; thick jumper, no coat. Dashing down the stairs two at a time, she wanted to make it there before her father.

Judy knew that her Dad wasn’t too happy about her dating Ian, but then again Dad wouldn’t have been happy if she had brought home a prince. He didn’t say much, but he had resorted to constantly giving Ian disapproving looks when they were all watching TV, and glaring at him every time he spoke. He probably thought that his actions would drive Ian away, but so far it hadn’t worked.

“Hi there, come on in it looks freezing out there.”

Closing the front door after himself, Ian handed Judy a heart covered gift bag. Placing the package on the radiator shelf, Judy immediately gave him a big hug and a long lingering kiss. When his nose touched her cheek she flinched, shocked at just how cold he was.

“Let’s go into the living room where it’s warm,” Judy told him, before whispering apologetically, “Mum and Dad are in there.”

Catherine and Ronald didn’t immediately look up when the living room door opened, but polite as ever, Ian greeted them.

“Evening Mr. and Mrs. Dixon, it’s lovely and warm in here.”

“Evening, Ian, go sit next to the radiator till you thaw out,” Catherine urged him.

Even the central heating wasn’t enough to thaw out the frost Ronald, who grunted loudly while never lifting his eyes from the newspaper on his lap.

Ronald Dixon was a bitter man. He had been in the same job for twenty years and never risen above the station of section assistant. The bicycle factory where he worked had many sections and ample opportunity for promotion, but Ronald was always passed by. Perhaps it was because he was just too good at his job, or perhaps it was because his stubborn and often belligerent attitude always got in the way?

After watching the clock for a respectable ten minutes filled with complete silence, Judy asked her mum if they could go into the kitchen and make themselves a drink. She knew better than to ask if they could go up to her room, but the kitchen was not considered to be out of bounds.

Picking up her Valentines gift from the hall shelf Judy and Ian headed for the kitchen, and once inside Judy closed the door firmly. At least now they would get advance warning, should someone try to spy on them.

Opening up the gift bag, Judy was overwhelmed by the treasures inside. A small brown teddy bear clutching a small red rose, a bottle of perfume, and a card. Lifting out the cuddly bear she stroked the fur, and then touched the rose gently. After placing them softly on the kitchen worktop she opened the box of perfume.

“Oh, Charlie. Everybody loves Charlie, but it’s so expensive,” she said proudly, whilst removing the lid and speedily spraying herself liberally with her new scent.

Finally, it was on to the Valentines card; in truth, the first one she had ever received. Expecting to find the usual jokey valentines verses that were passed around school each year she was taken aback by the handwritten verse inside.

‘I may not be a millionaire; I may not be a king,

But ooh my sugar baby love, I’ll give you anything,

I’ll be with you forever,

We’ll never ever part,

I promise that until we die you’ll always have my heart’.

Two anxious eyes waited for a response, and when it came Ian wasn’t disappointed. Dropping the card to the floor, Judy wrapped her arms around his waist and planted a huge kiss on his lips. For the next few moments the teenage romantics kissed, before stopping for air.

“Don’t you dare show anyone that card, or I’ll never live it down. I stayed up all night writing that, it took ages to make something up that would rhyme,” he proudly announced.

After spending the rest of the evening in the kitchen kissing and cuddling, in between several deliberate parental interruptions, the two lovebirds said their goodnights, and Ian went home.

Skipping up the stairs, Judy held her new love token close to her heart. She was definitely and totally in love. She would go to bed holding her teddy bear close, and pretending that it was Ian. Naively believing Ian’s sincere poetry, little did she know that only a couple of years later he would break his promise that they’d always be together.

The sound of the telephone stirred Judy from her slumber, and she swiftly realized that she must have dozed off. By the time she had reached the phone it had stopped ringing, and before she could check her missed calls list, her cell phone was beginning to ring.

“Hi Mum, just wanted to call to say I’ll be visiting friends for a few days at the end of term, but I hope to get home on Christmas Day. I wasn’t sure if you’d be at work today, and I know you’re busy, so I’ll let you get on.”

Before she knew it her conversation with Sophie was over. As usual Sophie was eager to get off the phone, but Judy didn’t take it personal, it was just how Sophie was. Thankfully, though, Sophie’s call had prevented her from being late for her shift.

After laying the 37 year old teddy gently upon her own bed, Judy took a quick shower and changed for work. She was becoming increasingly preoccupied by the forthcoming reunion and how she would handle the situation if Ian was there. The temptation to punch him on the nose or say something incredibly sarcastic might prove too hard to resist. On the other hand, she didn’t want to make a fool of herself, and perhaps it would be better to retain her dignity and pretend that she’d completely forgotten him.

Deciding that the best option was to simply wait and see what transpired when the reunion finally came around, Judy took the wise decision to try to put the whole thing out of her mind until the coming Friday.

Just about to leave for work, Judy’s phone pinged to tell her she had a text message, and she knew instantly who it was from.

‘Eeh, only five more sleeps till the school reunion. Talk to you later. XX’

It was Friday morning, and the day of the school reunion had finally arrived. Tonight, could either be a fantastic journey into the past for Elaine and Judy, or it could be turn out to be a bit of a damp squib. Then again, perhaps, there could be real fireworks of one sort or another if Ian actually turned up. Anyway, not long to wait now.

After an early shift, Judy got home early afternoon, and her timetable was planned with military precision. She didn’t want to leave anything to chance, and wanted to be ready to leave when Danny and Elaine arrived. Danny had offered to drop them both off and pick them up; but Elaine thought it better that they make their own way home, as they may be ready to get out of there almost immediately. Danny wouldn’t be pleased if he had to do a quick U-turn to pick them up; especially as there was football on the TV.

Danny and Elaine arrived dead on time, and after locking her front door securely Judy tottered out to the awaiting car. It had been quite some time since she had worn such high heels, and there was no one at her side to support her.

When they pulled up where the old school used to be they were both taken aback. It hadn’t really occurred to them how much things would have changed. Where the old red brick building once stood, there was an ultra modern building that looked nothing like a school at all. It had about as much character as a concrete box and looked every bit as cold. The ancient two storey building that was built in the 1920’s had, admittedly, looked rather imposing in its day, but it had character in spades. Gigantic floor to ceiling windows on the lower floor, small upper floor windows filled with tiny leaded panes which rattled wildly in the winter winds. Large stone archways leading to a large window lined quadrangle. Memories came flooding back; of the familiar sound of teacher’s footsteps as they echoed on the paved path running between the grassed areas. That one minute warning allowed just enough time to make sure that you weren’t caught doing something you shouldn’t, and was especially useful for Kevin Walker and company.

Elaine and Judy sighed in unison as they saw the large white monstrosity, still two storeys but all ice cold glass and concrete blocks.

Linking arms, just like they use to, the twosome followed the large handwritten strategically placed cardboard signs that directed them towards the large hall where the reunion was being held. As they approached the flat wooden swing doors they were met by a trio of volunteers. Whilst the first took the fee for attending the function, the second handed over a ticket. The third and final unpaid worker provided a large round orange badge on which you could write your name.

Rather reluctantly, the girls put on their name badges and made their entrance. It was a far cry from the last Christmas disco they had attended, and the size of the hall was a stark contrast to the number of former pupils. However, as they had spent time, money, and energy preparing for this adventure, both Elaine and Judy agreed to give it at least half an hour to pick up.

The room was decorated with reunion banners, and old school photographs from over the decades lined the plain white walls. The plastic chairs which lined the room fitted perfectly with the school building. Maybe it was just nostalgia, but both women agreed that the old school hall looked much nicer.

Small groups of men and women began to arrive, and soon the room was beginning to look less bleak. The growing numbers led to an increase in the volume of voices, and in turn the DJ upped the volume to an ear vibrating level. It wasn’t too long before the two women were forced to get right up close just to make themselves heard. Standing next to the refreshment table Elaine leaned over to Judy’s ear.

“Wonder if Kevin Walker has been at the punch?” she shouted.

“Have you seen anyone you recognize yet?” asked Judy as she flicked her eyes nervously around the large room.

“I think that looks like Yvette
Sparnon over there; it looks a lot like the picture that she’s used on Facebook. I wonder if that guy is her husband, he looks a bit of a wuss; I wonder if she bullies him the same way she did the kids at school. I know it sounds really mean, Judy, but when I see someone like her I can’t help hoping that she got a taste of her own medicine sometime in her life. She was just so cruel to everyone wasn’t she? I think we’ll go over in a moment, see if she remembers us, eh? Anyway, she’s still got a face like a Rottweiler.”

The two women smiled at each other then burst out laughing. Soon the sound of their hysterical childish laughter filled the room. Judy wiped the tears from her face and realized just why she loved Elaine so much. They had been there for each other through the good times and the bad, and you couldn’t say that about the other ‘fair weather friends’ she’d made over the years.

As Judy turned to refill her clear plastic cup with punch, she felt a warm breath on her shoulder. Assuming that it was Elaine she saw no need to turn around.

“Fancy a dance?” a deep voice boomed.

Visibly jumping, Judy spun around to see a tall man beaming at her, momentarily stunned and lost for words, she only had to look into his eyes to recognize him.

“
Eeh, is it you Ian, it is you isn’t it, where’s Kevin, is he here too?” an excitable Elaine interrupted.

“Yes, yes, don’t precisely know, no,” answered Ian jokingly.

Judy was just in the process of shouting a sarcastic comment, when the music suddenly stopped and she was left shouting in a room where you could have heard a pin drop.

“I’m surprised you had the gall”

She was just about to say, ‘gall to talk to me after what you did’. However, quick thinking in the graveyard quiet room allowed her to get away with it without looking totally stupid.

“I’m surprised you had the gall to show up without the other half of the double act.”

Sudden feedback from the microphone induced everyone to simultaneously turn to the front of the room. As the DJ removed his mega sized headphones and cleared his throat noisily, he welcomed everyone to the reunion. After relaying the evening’s agenda to his captive audience, he proceeded to offer to play special requests and dedications.

As always, an occasion like this seems to create a
compulsive need for people to choose a music track that sounds as terrible now as it did when it was first released. Thus a myriad of dreadful songs composed over the last four decades were blasted out in digitally remastered stereo! Elaine couldn’t handle it any longer.

“I’ve had enough of this. It’s about time we got some decent music on,” she yelled before striding over determinedly to the DJ with the jumbo headphones. Elaine wasn’t one to take no for an answer, as both Judy and Ian knew for sure, so there was a guarantee that Elaine’s music requests would be played.

The two of them watched from beside the refreshments table as Elaine waved her glistening jewelry clad arm in the air, gesturing wildly before seizing the DJ’s personal extensive list of tracks. Soon she was pointing to this one and that, before finally returning to her plastic cup and the conversation. While the DJ fumbled through his tracks, earphones on, earphones off, searching for the list of songs that Elaine had urged him to play, it was time to learn more about the absent Kevin. It was also time to learn a little about what Ian had done with his life.

“So, Ian, whatever happened to Kevin Walker?”

“Well,” Ian started. “After we had spent a full six months backpacking around Europe, he had sort of an epiphany. He met a slightly built red head who was studying ancient history. Suddenly he decided that he was in love, and that his life’s purpose was to educate others in the wonders of the ancient world,” Ian mocked.

“So, where is he now?” Elaine asked.

“I’m not quite sure. Last I heard he was head lecturer at some college or other. Last time I saw him he had a crew cut and was wearing brown corduroy’s and a beige shirt. Not quite the ‘happening guy’ he used to be.” Ian laughed affectionately.

“What about you then?” asked
Elaine.

Judy was simply a spectator in these interrogations and was quite happy to bite her tongue and let Elaine thoroughly grill Ian.

“If I’m honest, I haven’t done much to write home about. After travelling around with Kevin I tried a few different things, before finally succumbing to my parents’ nagging and going into the fire service. Stayed single up until two years ago; got dumped about a month ago.”

“Now you know how it feels then,” chimed in Judy, quite unintentionally.

“What was that, Judy?” Ian screwed up his face.

“Nothing,” grumbled Judy, deciding that this wasn’t the time or the place to speak her mind.

“Ooh, tell me more, Ian,” Elaine pleaded; anxious to hear who he’d hooked up with and why he’d been dumped. She seemed totally oblivious to the fact that this was the guy who had broken her best friend’s heart all those years ago.

“Nothing much to tell, really.
I stayed single because it seemed less complicated, until I met Nicole.  Nicole was an aspiring model who was destined for great things; at least that’s what she kept on telling me on a twice weekly basis. Then she ran off with her Italian hairstylist, Luigi; he made her an offer she couldn’t refuse, free haircuts for life and all the peroxide she could wish for.”

Elaine roared with laughter, while Judy tried to prevent even a hint of a smile from showing.

“You’re still as crazy as ever then, Ian?” giggled Elaine.

“Not really. I’ve calmed down a lot over the years, but sometimes you just have to accept things, don’t you? There’s a word for it; begins with a ‘K’ what’s it called again?”

“Kismet?” asked Elaine.

At the very same time, Judy couldn’t resist chiming in.

“Don’t you mean Karma? You know, what goes around comes around.”

Ian gave Judy a curious look, and she was rather irritated that he didn’t appear to make the connection. Resigned to the fact that Ian had not only got over her but had apparently totally forgotten what he had put her through, she decided to forgive and forget, at least for tonight. When the unmistakable introduction to the
Rubettes single began to play, the trio laughed out loud.

“
Wanna dance?” Ian asked, as he stared deep into Judy’s eyes.

Determined not to let her guard down too much, Judy turned to Elaine.

“What do you think, Elaine, should we dance with him?”

“Oh, why not, come on, let’s us three show them how it should be done.”

As Elaine gestured to the other two to follow her, Ian grabbed Judy’s arm and attempted to whisper in her ear.

“That wasn’t quite what I had in mind.”

Judy shrugged her shoulders and smiled, before following Elaine onto the dance floor. Ian reluctantly followed. The threesome soon forgot any inhibitions and they were soon reliving their youth again. The relaxing rhythm of the song eased Judy’s tension and immediately warmed the still slightly frosty atmosphere. As the next few tracks were all Elaine’s choices they were blessed with several of the unforgettable Alvin Stardust hits. Each and every song had its own little memory attached and after three consecutive Alvin classics it was just like old times.

“I must be getting old or something; I think it’s about time for a break, don’t you?” asked Elaine as she puffed and panted.

Before the words had even passed her lips, the song that always tugged at Judy’s heart strings began.

“
Bom, bom, bom, bom, ooh oohooh, ooh, oohooh, ooh oohooh, ooh, bom, bom, bom, bom.”

“You
wanna dance, Judy?” asked Ian.

Judy stared at Elaine in search of guidance, but the knowing smile she got in return told her that Elaine’s timing may have been deliberate. Judy couldn’t help noticing that Elaine was no longer puffing and panting as she had been only moments earlier.

“Go on, Judy,” Elaine winked, “live dangerously, have fun; you may not get another chance.”

Judy nodded to Elaine, then to Ian. While her best friend left the dance floor, Ian pulled Judy up close, and as they danced slowly on the spot he spoke gently into her ear.

“I never got over you, you know. I saw you once, years ago, with a guy. You were pushing a pram and he was carrying a little boy in his arms.”

“That would be my husband, Bruce.”

“What, the little boy?” quipped Ian.

“No; the guy.
The guy was Bruce, my husband. He died.”

Ian’s face instantly began to glow in the dark.

“Oh, I’m so sorry; me and my big mouth.”

“It’s OK, it’s not your fault,
you weren’t to know. It’s been ten years now. Anyway, why didn’t you speak at the time?”

“Well, I figured maybe it was him that you had dumped me for, and for once in my life I decided I wasn’t about to make a complete fool of myself.”

“Hold on, let’s get this straight; you took off and I never heard from you again. What do you mean, me dumping you?”

Judy was feeling her temperature rise; it was like he was rewriting history, and she could feel herself pulling away from Ian. But this wasn’t the time to have a shouting match. Ian was obviously thinking the same thing, and before she had chance to say something she might regret he took matters into his own hands.