Lord Sinister (Secrets & Scandals Book 3) (25 page)

He snapped his head around in surprise.

“Don’t look so stunned. I’ve known you a long time.”  Marcus shook his head as a grin spread across his lips.  “You’ll not succeed with the endeavor, I’m afraid.”

Julian went rigid, his right hand squeezing his left behind his back.  “I have no idea what you mean.”

The blasted doctor actually chuckled.  “Deny it all you want to, young man, but I know what you’re going through.”  Past memories clouded his expression, turning his smile bittersweet.  “My Penelope, God rest her blessed soul, drove me to the brink of lunacy at least once a week during the entire fourteen years we were married.  Until I lost her to diphtheria.”  He focused on Julian, his eyes glassy.  “And I wouldn’t trade one moment of it for all the riches in the world.”

Shaking his head, Julian said, “It’s not the same, Marcus.”

“Of course it is.  You love her and she loves you.”

Julian ambled to the rail and gripped the wood, taking in deep gulps of air.  “If she loved me, Marcus, she would want to be with me.”  He gritted his teeth.  “For us to be a family.  But that is not the case.”

“How are you so certain of that?”

“I heard it spill from her own lips.”

“Truly?”  Marcus stepped up to his side.  “She told you that?”

“Not me.”  He shook his head.  “I overheard her telling someone she wanted nothing above her freedom.”  The memory sliced through him like a white-hot dagger.  Dear God, why wouldn’t the pain go away?  Was he doomed to feel this way forever?

Marcus’s hand settled on his shoulder.  “What if you misunderstood?”

Julian froze.  For a quarter of a heartbeat he allowed himself to fantasize on the impossible assumption that he had been incorrect.  That what he’d heard in Amelia’s own voice had nothing to do with him, that she really did love him and wanted desperately to return to him.  And then cold, harsh reality came crashing down on him.  He snorted with disdain.  “I know what I heard.”

“I’m not doubting that.”  Marcus’s hand squeezed his good shoulder.  “What I’m saying is she could have been trying to convince herself she wanted freedom as much as you have been trying to convince yourself you aren’t in love with her.”

The doctor’s hand slid away, his retreating footsteps clanking against the deck.  Julian straightened from the rail and braced his legs against the rising wind.  In that instant, he found what he’d been searching for: what to do next.  If any hope existed in finding peace, he had to confront Amelia.  He had to hear her tell him directly she wanted nothing more to do with him.  He had to see the truth in her eyes.  He had to know it for a certainty.

****

Dr. Landon assisted Amelia to the ground, wearing a worried frown.  “I’ll be back for you early.”  He eyed the puffy, gray-blue clouds.  “This evening promises a freeze, and we might even see sleet.  May I return for you in three hours?”

“Yes, that will be fine,” she said with a smile and headed to the cottage.  As autumn slipped into winter, Dr. Landon insisted on taking her to see Hilda by carriage.  He refused to let her to walk the five-mile distance in her condition, especially in such cold temperatures.

Hilda opened the door.  “Come in, girl, and get warm by the fire.”

Amelia settled into the chair she usually occupied on her visits while Hilda poured steamy tea into two chipped cups.

“I had a dream last night.”

Her head shot up.  Hilda hadn’t dreamed anything since their meeting.  She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry.  “Yes?  Do go on.”

The old woman settled back in her chair with her tea.  “I dreamed that people are convinced of your innocence.”

Amelia grew faint.  “Oh, no, Alex!”

“He’s innocent, too.”

“What?” she asked weakly, setting her full teacup on the scarred old table to her right.

“It was a man who pulled the trigger.  A man with a missing tooth in front.”  Hilda sipped her tea.  “Your husband knew it was a man, though he didn’t see him clearly.”

Amelia shot to her feet.  “What about the note?  The one Jack had months ago?”

Hilda nodded.  “It’s just as before.  I clearly saw a note luring you into a trap.  Ignore it.  Don’t go.  There is danger and death.”

“But if the note Jack brought me was true, how can it be a trap?”  She shook her head, unable to bear the thought that Hilda had been wrong.  What if the old woman really was mad?

Hilda set aside her empty cup, frowning slightly.  “True.  Perhaps it is another note.”

“Another note?”  Amelia grew angry.  “Another note?”  Unable to say anything else, she reached for her coat.  Pushing her arms through the heavy wool, she left the house, slamming the door closed.  “Another note,” she said sourly.  “Why didn’t I listen to everyone?”  Glowering at the cottage over her shoulder, she added, “Dr. Landon even tried to warn me.”

With an indignant humph, she set her shoulders and marched toward town.  Icy wind gusted, pulling a lock of hair loose from her twist.  With a shiver, she buttoned her coat, then felt for her gloves and groaned when she realized she’d forgotten them.  Bowing her head into the wind, she forged ahead, shoving her hands into her pockets.

After a few steps, she thought about what it would mean if everyone knew she was innocent?  If Alex was innocent as well?  Her heart nearly skipped a beat and her steps slowed.  Could it mean she could see her son again?

Her breath caught, and she glanced up the deserted road ahead.  Well, she had better find out what was going on.  And with that thought firmly in mind, she increased her pace, skirting muddy puddles and rocks in her path.

After four miles, Amelia halted near an ancient stone wall that ran at least another quarter mile up the road.  She leaned against it, breathing hard.  Small white puffs escaped her lips, the cold stinging her lungs.  Her heart banged a steady, rapid beat in her chest, and her hands were two blocks of ice.  The extra weight she now carried had her back and legs aching like the devil.  She rubbed her hands together, then cupped them over her growing middle, smiling when the baby kicked in answer.  The child had grown strong, its movements no longer butterfly wings trapped in her belly, but solid jabs and punches.

Tears unwillingly sprang into her eyes.  How she missed Alex.  Amelia used the sleeve of her coat to dash the errant wetness away.  She would not cry.  No.  Not one single tear.  If there was even a chance she could see Alex again, she had to find out the truth behind the note Jack had received.

With a deep breath that burned her lungs, she pushed away from the wall and walked the remaining mile.  Having her head bowed to the wind, it wasn’t until she reached the edge of Dr. Landon’s yard she found him talking to another man.  A tall man.  Though he faced away, there was something familiar about his size and the way he stood.  Dr. Landon noticed her and the other man turned.  She froze.

Julian!

Not one hour had passed that she did not recall his pasty countenance as he lay in a pool of his own blood and how she’d wished it had been herself lying there instead.  Her gaze roved over his handsome face, the high cheekbones once again tanned, glowing in good health, his sculptured lips and strong jaw.  Then, unable to help herself, she fused her gaze with his.  A mistake.  In the depths of his eyes sparked some intense emotion she could not name, something that hollowed out her belly.  It frightened her, yet she could not look away.  She stood there, mesmerized.

He left Dr. Landon and approached her.  When Julian stood mere inches away, when she could smell his achingly familiar scent, feel the warmth of his body, she made the effort to halt the spell he cast and tried to move past.  Instead, his hand shot out and captured her upper arm.  “Don’t go,” his deep voice said softly.

Amelia trembled from his touch.  She wanted—no craved to leap into his arms and shower his face with kisses.  What a weak fool!  Julian no longer wanted her.  He’d ended their marriage, for God’s sake.

She pulled her arm from his grip.  “Leave me alone,” she said, her throat raw from keeping tears at bay.

The muscles in his jaw tightened and a vein bulged at his left temple.  “Not until we have one last discussion.” Then he propelled her toward the carriage she hadn’t noticed before now.

Dr. Landon sprang forward.  “Excuse me, my lord.  I do not know who you are, but Mrs. Sinclair is not going anywhere with you.”

Annoyance flashed across Julian’s face.  “This matter does not concern you.”

“It most certainly does.”

Julian halted as one of the footmen bowed and opened the door.  Amelia tried unsuccessfully to pry her arm free.  “Release me,” she said.

“Release her, sir, at once,” Dr. Landon stammered, his face glowing red.

Amelia groaned.  It would be a simple matter for Julian to knock the poor man senseless.  Just one hit would be enough.  Julian looked furious enough to do it.  She sighed.  “Stop this, both of you.”

Dr. Landon swung worried eyes to her.  “Who is this man, Mrs. Sinclair?  Another cousin?”

Amelia almost smiled.  “No, Dr. Landon.”

His confusion deepened.  “Then who…?” his voice trailed away and his gaze turned suspicious as he turned back to Julian.

“I am Julian Westland, the Marquess of Amersleigh.  Amelia’s husband.”

She caught a glimpse at Dr. Landon’s stunned eyes and gaping mouth as Julian shoved her into the carriage, then they were speeding down the road.  “Where are you taking me?”

Silence.

“What are you doing here?”

Silence.

“How did you find me?”

She blew out a breath of impatience when he continued to stare out the window instead of answering her questions.  “Well, aren’t you going to say something, Julian?  Surely there’s a point to all of this.”

He slowly turned, his brows drawn, his jaw clenched, and just stared at her for a long time.  She grew uneasy, shifting on the plush velvet squab.  Finally, he spoke.  “I must have the truth, Amelia.”

The truth?  She felt all her blood drain down to her toes.  Oh, no!  Did he know about the baby?  Would he take him away from her, too?  She gripped the folds of the large coat, knowing it hid her condition well.  So how did he guess?  Surely, Dr. Landon hadn’t told him.  Who could have…?  Her thoughts broke off as a sudden idea occurred.  “Have you been spying on me?”

He leaned back, his face revealing nothing, and crossed his arms stubbornly over his chest.  “The truth, Amelia.  I must hear all of it.”

She closed her eyes, bowing her head.  Explaining about the baby would be difficult.  “H-How was I supposed to tell you?” she whispered.

There was a slight pause.  “Would it have been so difficult to tell me the truth?” he asked softly, his voice losing its angry edge.

Her head shot up.  She didn’t care if he could see the emotions surely raw and exposed on her face.  It took too much effort to hide them at the moment.  “And when was I supposed to tell you, Julian?  I only realized it a couple of months ago.”  She slid her gaze away, fighting the tears trying to well up in her eyes.  “About the same time I received the papers to nullify our marriage.”

His face crumpled in guilt.  “Oh, Amelia,” his hand covered hers, warm and strong, “that was a mistake.”  He captured her right hand and brought it up to his lips for a tender kiss.  “I am sorry, dearest.  Now that I know the truth, everything will be corrected.  We are still married, you know.”  He turned her hand up and kissed her palm.  “I never requested the suit of nullity.  I couldn’t go through with it.  It never went to court.”

Amelia’s breath caught.  They were still married?  Then her mind centered on one thought.  Did Julian want her back for no other reason but the child she carried?  And, learning that they were still legally wed, he could force her back.  Even if she protested, no one could do anything about it.

“Don’t.”  She pulled her hand away.  “Don’t pretend.”

He looked up, stunned.  “What?”

“I said don’t pretend.  If what you say is true about our marriage, I have to go with you if you wish it.”

Julian moved his head from side to side.  “I don’t underst—”

“Ooohhh.”  She doubled over, a sharp pain slicing through her right side.

“Amelia?”   He reached out to steady her so that she didn’t topple to the floor.  “What is wrong?”

Panting, she shook her head.  “I don’t know.” She clutched her side, the pain unbearable.  “Take me to Dr. Landon.”

Several minutes later, the carriage skidded to a halt.  Amelia’s head spun, but she held on to consciousness with all her strength, assessing everything she felt.  She didn’t think she was bleeding, feeling no wetness.  A very good sign.

Julian pushed open the carriage door, calling to his footman to fetch the doctor, then scooped her up into his arms.  He stepped to the ground.  She bit her lip to keep from crying out.

“Shhh, my love, it will be all right,” Julian said into her ear, his breath caressing her cheek with tender warmth.

She forced open her eyes, realizing it was trying to rain.  A cold mist fluttered down around them.  Some had caught in Julian’s dark hair.  The pain eased just a bit, leaving her shaken and nauseous.  She heard footsteps and turned to see Dr. Landon rushing up to greet them, his face stark white.  “What happened?”  He held open the door.