Lost Honor (15 page)

But Arianna must have someone to constantly watch over and take care of her, even if it was not what she wanted. A man who would treat her kindly, yet keep her on a firm leash. She needed a husband.

His men glanced up from their chores to follow his progress to the quarterdeck where Andrew stood ready to report the events of the previous night and today.

“How is she?” Andrew asked as soon as Morgan halted beside him. His features held a tight edge.

“Better. Her face is a mess, but she will heal. Even though she puts up a brave front, she is still frightened, but that is to be expected.”

“Did she tell you why Briggs attacked her?”

“He was bent on revenge.” The short, sharp words shot from his lips. “It seems she told her father he was the man who threw a younger seaman overboard. The lad couldn’t swim. Briggs was flogged for it. He blamed her.”

“So he did know her previously.”

“It appears so.”

Andrew lowered his tone, his voice unsure. “Did he rape her?”

“No, thank God. I would have killed him again if he had.”

“The men have been asking about her. She made an impression on them.”

Morgan couldn’t decide if that was good or not. He wanted her to be liked but not encouraged. He placed his hands behind his back and donned his expressionless mask. “Tell them she will recover.”

He breathed deeply, filling his chest. Already he felt better. He glanced to the side at Andrew standing straight and tall beside him and his earlier thoughts about Arianna needing a husband returned. Andrew was handsome, loyal, kind, and if he could command hardened seamen, surely he could manage Arianna and keep her in her place.

Was it possible? He seemed concerned about her welfare. If Andrew married Arianna, he would never have to worry about her. Although as soon as he returned home and settled down with Susan, Arianna would surely flee his mind. He hoped. He prayed. His feelings for her were lust. Plain lust. It was sailing on the ocean without a woman around for miles, even though it had never bothered him to this extent before.

Andrew had confessed he would never marry, but Arianna had a quality about her that would appeal to any man, and even if Andrew didn’t realize it, he had to settle down at some point.

He stared at the horizon, his hands still clutched behind his back. “Andrew, go to my cabin and watch over Arianna. She is sleeping now, but when she awakens, she will need someone with her. She still fears being alone.”

“What about my duties?”

“That is your only one for the moment.” He felt Andrew scrutinizing him in that thoughtful way, searching for a motive, but Morgan refused to look at him. Andrew always spied too much in his eyes even when he shuttered his thoughts.

“Aye Captain.” Andrew left without an argument.

Morgan frowned.

Chapter Nine

Morgan had left her. He swore he would stay. Feelings of abandonment surrounded Arianna as her gaze darted around the cabin. The sun shone outside, but her mind conjured shadows within the room. What dangers hid there?

The ocean crashed against the hull, wood creaked, rigging clanged, and sails flapped in the breeze, but other noises, ominous and close, crept to her ears.

Flashes of her attack slithered into her mind. No. She squeezed her eyes shut. They had no place in her life, except to warn her she must learn how to outwit men twice her size. As small as she was, she couldn’t overpower brutal monsters bent on evil.

She needed to sit up. It would make her feel more like herself and less vulnerable. Standing would be even better. She shifted. Pain intruded, and she stilled. No, sitting first. Maybe standing tomorrow.

Arianna slowly rolled to one side, and pushing up with an aching arm, she achieved her goal. Easing back, she leaned against the hard wall and concentrated on subduing her harsh breathing. Out of the corner of her eyes, she noticed the door inching open. Morgan? No, he would march in. Anyone else would knock.

A seaman wanting to avenge the death of one of his own? Her heart galloped in her chest and blood surged through her veins as she sought a weapon. Anything.

The door opened wider.

Panic threatened. Her hands clenched into fists. Tension stiffened her tortured muscles. She couldn’t go through this again. Would anyone hear her if she screamed? She opened her mouth.

A head popped around the corner. She drew in a deep breath.

The face turned toward the bed. Mr. Markham. She collapsed against the wall, limp.

The first mate rushed to her side. “What’s wrong? Should I call Captain Danvers? The surgeon?”

She fought to catch her breath. “I’m f-fine. You s-scared me. I didn’t know it was you. I thought one of the crew…” She rolled her head back and forth at her stupidity.

Worried eyes searched her face. “The captain said you were sleeping. I didn’t want to wake you.”

“It’s not your fault.”

Ramrod straight, he stood before her.

She dragged the blanket up and held it to her chest. “Why are you here?” And where was Morgan?

He had a ship to run. She couldn’t expect him to spend every minute of his day with her. But she missed his steady presence, even when he ordered her about. His protection and the way he cared for her filled Arianna with a reassurance she lacked at this time.

She wasn’t sure she liked these feelings. She wished to be independent and not rely on anyone at anytime for anything. Even now she cringed at how she had pleaded for him to remain with her last night and expected him to stay today. But she had to admit, she did enjoy the things he did to her that fired her body and made it sing and yearn and stretch beyond the normal limits.

“The captain asked me to sit with you. He didn’t want you to be alone.”

Why couldn’t he have told her? Why did he sneak out? “You don’t need to. I’m sure you have duties that require your attention.”

He grabbed the back of the ladder-back chair and in one easy motion swung it to face her. “This is my assigned duty at present.” He sank onto the seat.

She didn’t have the energy to keep up a running conversation with a man she barely knew. With Morgan, the words flowed from her mouth with ease. And her face… She could imagine what she looked like. Her mind created hideous pictures. “Really Mr. Markham—”

“You can call me Andrew.” He leaned forward. “But only in private. Not in front of the crew.”

“But—”

“I insist.” He hesitated. “If you don’t mind.”

Considerate and nice popped into her mind. Morgan never allowed her to use his Christian name, even after their intimate embrace, although she thought of him as such. But he was the captain and deserved and demanded respect. If she wanted to be part of his crew, she must abide by the rules. After they arrived in Boston, she would sign on to a different ship returning to England, and she would never see him again.

Her heart lurched. She would miss him. Tears formed as she pictured herself walking away.

This was ridiculous. She had only known the man a few days. Her emotions were still too raw, exposed, and close to the surface after the attack.

“You don’t have to call me Andrew. Mr. Markham is fine.”

She had given him the wrong impression. She blinked back the tears and sniffed. “No, I would like to call you by your Christian name, Andrew.” She smiled at him, and he reciprocated.

He had a nice smile and white, even teeth. His dark hair, green eyes, long lashes, and even features presented a pleasing picture. “The men were asking after you.”

“Were they hoping I died?”

Confusion crossed Andrew’s face. “No, they are worried about you.”

Amazement ignited within her. “Aren’t they mad at me for killing Briggs? He was part of the crew.”

“He was not liked by many of the men. They think what he did to you was terrible.”

“I’m glad they don’t hold it against me.” One of her goals was to make friends with the men and according to Andrew, she had succeeded. Having friends to stand beside her as she worked added another dimension to the job. “I really am fine now. You don’t have to sit with me.”

“I can’t disobey the captain’s order.” He rose and walked to a low cabinet standing against the far wall. “Do you play chess?”

“Yes.”

“Good, because Captain Danvers keeps a set in his cabin. He tries to beat me.” His mouth twisted in a smug smile as he strode back with the board and pieces. “But he hasn’t been able to yet. Are you brave enough to face the master?”

She loved a challenge. Her papa had taught her well, and she had learned much from her siblings to the point where they wouldn’t play with her anymore because she always won. Her impulsive and illogical moves confounded their logical minds but served her well in a game where it shouldn’t.

Andrew laid the board beside her on the bed, placed the men in the appropriate spots, and then pulled his chair close.

After the first few moves, she discovered he was really good. She allowed the blanket to fall to her waist as she concentrated. Arianna feared she would lose the fierce game, but she defeated him in the end.

He stared at her with great respect and astonishment. “I am amazed. How did you do that?” He studied the board, his forehead furrowed. “I couldn’t follow your moves.” He looked back at her with determination. “I demand a rematch.” Andrew seemed to suddenly remember her health. “If you aren’t too tired.”

Weariness pulled at her but the game had barricaded other thoughts from entering. “I would love to beat you again.” She smiled.

He returned a lopsided grin as he set up the board. “Not this time, you won’t.”

A pleasant and thoughtful companion, he must have hundreds of female admirers. Or did he have a wife? “Is there a special woman waiting for you back home?”

“No.”

“Really? I can’t believe it’s true.”

He rested his forearms on his knees and hesitated before voicing his opinion. “I have witnessed the heartache involved in relationships. I might fancy a woman now and again, but I will never commit my heart.” He shook his head. “I’m not allowing a female to twist and play with my emotions.”

What could she say to that? It did happen. She had seen women work their feminine wiles to get what they desired from men and even though she didn’t like it, she had used hers a time or two. But only because as a woman, she had few options.

“Why aren’t you settled down with a husband and children?”

It was a fair question after she had inquired into his life. She sat as straight as she could without pain. “First, I have to prove I’m capable of taking care of my life and my children if it ever comes to that. I won’t rely on a man. After this ship docks, I plan to work on another back to England.”

“But—”

“Don’t say it. I have heard it all from Captain Danvers. Last night was a setback, but I will learn from it and devise a way to remain safe.” She pointed to her face. “I won’t allow this to happen, again.”

He didn’t argue but stared into her eyes for a few minutes as if he could acquire all the answers he needed there. Then he seemed satisfied and gestured to the board. “You go first.”

****

A broad smile blossomed on Andrew’s face. “Checkmate.”

Arianna stared at the board. “It can’t be.”

“Look for yourself.” Andrew leaned back in his chair and, lifting his leg, rested his ankle on his knee. He clasped his hands together behind his head. “I haven’t lost my touch.”

Her head bent, Arianna’s gaze darted over the board as she fought to find something he had missed. He had soundly defeated her. She sighed and lifted her lashes. “You’re right. You have won.” Weariness covered her like a blanket. What little energy she possessed had drained away. “I demand a rematch but at another time. You have worn me out.”

Andrew jumped to his feet. “I’m sorry. I should have never insisted on another game.”

She shot him a reassuring smile. “I was fine at the time.” Arianna squirmed, attempting to lie down. She did so in minute degrees but pain still ate into her muscles.

“Let me help you.”

Before she could refuse, he placed one warm arm behind her back and the other under her covered legs and situated her in a comfortable position. He released her slowly.

Heat crept into her face. “Thank you.”

“There is no need to thank me.” He drew the blanket over her.

She closed her eyes. The rustling of his clothing as he sank into the chair beside her drifted to her ears. His even breathing filled the room. Her skin tingled. His gaze studied her. Arianna was sure of it. Her eyes popped open. “I can’t sleep if you remain here, staring at me.”

He straightened and swung his eyes away. “I’ll sit on the other side of the room.”

“But I will know you are here and why. I’ll be fine if you leave.” Arianna forced confidence to her eyes. “Please.”

He frowned. “Are you sure you don’t mind being alone?”

“Yes, I’m sure. But before you leave could you hand me my bag in the corner.”

He granted her wish and then hesitated.