Love and War: The Coltrane Saga, Book 1 (2 page)

Nathan watched in silent amazement. Katherine Wright was easily the most beautiful young woman in all of Wayne County. Men talked about her silken golden hair, and her eyes so blue they were almost purple. Violet, someone once called them, violet eyes that danced with the fire of the devil in hell when she was riled.

His eyes moved slowly over her body, which was also graciously endowed with the physical attributes of feminine beauty, with voluptuous breasts straining against the confines of her dress. Her waist was so tiny that she had no need for featherbone corsets that other less fortunate young women so tightly laced themselves into.

Nathan thought how beautiful she was, even at such a moment. And even though his parents, particularly his father, were adamantly opposed to his courting the daughter of a Federalist sympathizer, Nathan’s eyes reflected his desire for her. He had lain awake many nights with the image of her in his mind, wanting to taste the sweetness of her lips and hold her body close, wrapping himself in her warmth.

Kitty had been on her knees, and suddenly she fell back on her bottom with an undignified plop, as the calf slid from its mother. They all laughed with relief as the wet, slick animal fought to stand on his wobbly legs, his mother already beginning to nuzzle him lovingly.

Jacob was jumping up and down, crying, “I can’t wait to tell your pappy, missy. He’s gonna be real proud of what you done. I’m gonna go find Fanny and tell her right now.” And he ran from the barn excitedly.

Suddenly, Kitty was all too aware of her appearance—bloody, lard-smeared arms, stained dress, perspiration dripping down her face. She knew she smelled terribly, too. With embarrassment, she looked at Nathan. “I’m sorry. I’m a sight, I know. But this had to be done…”

“I understand.” He nodded and smiled slightly, and she thought how lovely were the crinkles in the corners of his eyes. “I heard that your father freed his slaves last year, Katherine, and I don’t imagine it’s easy running this farm without any.”

“Oh, we never had all that many,” she said quickly, wiping her hands on a nearby rag. “Poppa never believed in owning slaves. The only reason we ever had any at all was because of my mother. To her, slaves are a status symbol. Poppa finally freed what we had, but Jacob and Fanny stayed on, because they love Poppa so.”

Leaning against a post, he watched as she rinsed her face and arms in a pail of clean water. “I remember when we used to go to the settlement school,” he said thoughtfully. “James Freeman came to school one day with a little slave boy totin’ his books for him. The slave boy dropped the books in a mud puddle, and James thought he did it on purpose, so he took the book strap and started beating him with it. You jumped on James and shoved him down in the puddle. You really gave him a beating. I never saw a girl fight like that before. You punched him right in the face with your fists.”

Kitty felt her face grow hot. “It wasn’t very ladylike of me to fight like that. Momma gave me one of the worst whippings of my life when she found out, but I couldn’t stand back and watch James beat that boy like he was a mongrel dog.”

“I’ve never forgotten that day.” Nathan smiled.

“Slavery gets me all fired up,” she retorted.

“You might feel differently if your father had a large plantation and needed a lot of slaves to run it. I’ve heard when he did have slaves, he actually paid them for working.”

Their eyes met and held, and, for a moment, Kitty was able to shove aside her feelings for Nathan as she said vehemently, “I would never hold to putting a man in chains or thinking it’s right to own his soul, Nathan. I think it’s wrong to buy and sell human beings as though they’re no more than animals. On this subject, you and I and everyone else in Wayne County…in the whole South, it seems, differ in our opinions.”

He gave her a mock salute, and his eyes crinkled once again at the corners. “It’s refreshing to find a young woman with an opinion. Maybe that’s why I like you so much…because you’re so different from the girls I’m usually around.”

“Well, if that’s meant to be a compliment, thank you.”

“I came here to invite you to a party,” he went on, “but I’m afraid when you hear the reason for the party you’ll refuse my invitation.”

“I’m curious about the party, Nathan,” Kitty said, “and I’d like to hear about it.”

He took a deep breath, then said, “You know who Weldon Edwards is?”

“Who doesn’t? He’s a Radical. I know who he is and why he comes to this part of the state. Poppa talks to me about politics, and he says that Weldon Edwards is trying to round up support for the secessionist meeting planned in Raleigh.”

“My father is honored to have him as a guest, and he’s planned a barbecue in his honor on Sunday, the eleventh. I’d like for you to come as my guest.”

“Me sit down to a table to eat with a Radical?” she cried, then she realized that he was looking at her with amusement, and that was annoying. She hated the way men felt women should not know, or care, anything about politics, much less dare to voice an opinion.

And now he stared at her as though she were an amusing child, and she stamped her foot and glared up at him, eyes stormy. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m not trying to be funny, Nathan. I know what I’m talking about. That man wants war…”

He raised an eyebrow. “I guess you’ll tell me next that you know enough about the subject that you don’t feel secession—or war—is wise for North Carolina.”

She nodded firmly, eyes still fiery.

Shaking his head, Nathan sighed and reached out to touch her shoulder, but she stepped back. “Katherine, secession, like war, is imminent. It’s merely a matter of time. Whether you like it or not, you’ve got to be loyal to your state—and to the South.”

“I have no sympathy for the Radicals and all those who want war,” she stormed. “And neither does my father.”

“But he would be loyal to his state, Katherine, and whatever position his state voted to take if war does come.” This time he reached out to touch her cheek, and she did not pull away. “Those of us who stand together won’t have any sympathy for those who stand apart. But do you and I have to quarrel? If you only knew how long I’ve wanted to call on you, but you never gave me any inclination that I might have a chance. I’ve heard about how you turn away every man who comes to your door.”

Through lowered lashes, she looked at him teasingly. “Then why do you come now to invite me to a party for a man who supports something I stand against?”

“Because I’ve waited too long already.” His voice was firm, and his arms encircled her waist. “Besides, last Sunday in church I happened to catch you looking at me, and there was a little sparkle of interest in those lovely eyes of yours, so I dared to hope maybe I’d have a chance. Now will you go to the party with me? We won’t have to worry about Weldon Edwards. We can be together.”

A wave of dizziness washed over her. No one had ever made her feel this way—all quivery inside as though everything within would explode and burst any second. Confused, not knowing what to say, she turned to gaze out the barn window at the stark, naked fields beyond. To her father, this land was beautiful, and she shared his affection, because it was theirs. But to someone like Nathan, whose family owned hundreds and hundreds of acres of farmland, tended by a hundred or more slaves, this was poverty—a squalid dirt farm. Why, then, when they obviously lived in two different worlds, was he asking her to attend an important party at his family’s home?

And then she remembered Nancy Warren, his constant companion at every social occasion. Snapping her head back to stare at him, she bluntly asked, “What about Nancy Warren? Did she go away to visit someone and leave you without someone to escort to the party?”

“Now why do you have to be so stubborn?” His hands moved to clamp firmly on her shoulders, shaking her gently. “Can’t you get it through your head that you’re the girl I’ve yearned for all these years? I just never thought I’d have a chance with you, Katherine. Believe me, there’s no one else I’d rather be with than you.”

She pulled away from him and walked slowly to the barn window. He followed and stood beside her. A few chickens pecked about in the yard, cackling softly to each other. “What about your family?” she asked. “Would they approve of your courting me, Nathan?”

Quickly he reached to spin her around, their faces so close she could feel the warmth of his breath upon her cheeks. “You’re so beautiful… I’ve dreamed of this moment…”

And then his lips came down, slowly, gently, at first, as she stiffened, then yielded, and the kiss became demanding as he tightened his arm about her to draw her body closer. For long, seemingly endless moments, they clung together. Kitty began to tremble with longing for more. There had been stolen kisses in corncribs or haystacks with boys when she was but a child, but never had there been a kiss like this, with fire and passion, a kiss that brought every fiber of her being alive and tingling with emotions she never dreamed existed with such force.

Someone giggled. They pulled away instantly. Kitty turned just in time to see one of Jacob’s little boys scrambling down the rope that hung from the hayloft opening, escaping to the ground below, outside the barn.

Once again they were alone. He reached for her, but she held back, whispering nervously, “We shouldn’t…”

“Oh, yes, we should.” He pulled her against his chest. “I’ve wanted this for a long, long time, Katherine, and don’t lie to me and say you haven’t wanted it, too. I’ve seen you looking at me from across a room. Say you’ll come to the party with me. Don’t keep us apart when we feel this way about each other.”

“I’ll talk to Poppa about it,” she said finally.

“You don’t have to tell him that Mr. Edwards will be there.”

“He probably already knows about it. Poppa hears all the gossip and talk.”

“Would he forbid you to come?”

She shook her head. “He lets me make my own decisions.”

He sighed with relief, then said, respectfully, “You and your father are very close, aren’t you?”

“Yes. I love Poppa very much, Nathan. My mother and I, well,” she bit her lip, then went on, “we don’t agree on many things, and we quarrel a lot. She blames it on Poppa, saying he’s raised me as though I were the son he always wanted but never had. But that isn’t true. I just happen to believe that I have the right to speak my own mind and live my own life according to my will…and no one else’s.”

His sparkling eyes reflected the pleasure he felt over hearing a young lady speak in such a manner. “I’ve never known anyone like you, Katherine Wright. You really are a free spirit, aren’t you? Maybe that’s why I find you so fascinating, because you’re such a challenge. I think I’d like to be the man to tame that spirit of yours.”

“You think it can be tamed?” she challenged him.

“I think I’ve wanted to since that day you sat on James Freeman in the mud puddle.”

Her hand flew to her mouth in astonishment. “Did I really
sit
on him, Nathan? Oh, I don’t remember doing that. I just remember Momma whipping me for it.”

“Yes, you sat on him,” he assured her, laughing, “and I’ll never forget the sight. The other girls were horrified, and I think they and a lot of the boys have been scared of you ever since.”

The smile faded from her lips, but Nathan did not notice, nor did he know that he had just triggered painful memories. The other girls had avoided her for as long as she could remember; but she had tried not to let it bother her. There had been plenty to do to keep her busy on the farm, but still it hurt to hear of a birthday party or a summer afternoon tea she was not invited to.

Nathan was prodding her once again. “Will you come to the party, Katherine?”

She almost said yes, because she wanted to go with all her heart, but then she remembered that she had nothing to wear. “Nathan, I don’t even own a ball gown. We’re poor people, and there’s no money for such things. I’m very flattered that you invited me, and I’d be honored to go with you, but I don’t have a proper dress to wear.” The muslin dress she had on and another for Sunday were the only two dresses she owned. Her other clothes consisted of old pants and shirts of her father’s that she cut down to fit.

“I’m sorry.” She blinked back tears. “I really am.”

“It doesn’t matter. I know it matters to girls, though. Look, my sister, Adelia, is away in school, and she has ball gowns in her wardrobe that have never been worn. I could slip one out to you, and no one would ever know.”

She was flattered by his thoughtfulness but knew how hurt her father would be if he found out she borrowed a dress to wear. And she knew, but did not want to say, that her mother would find a way, if one were possible, to get a dress for her to wear to the party. If anyone could work a miracle at that point, it would be Lena Wright, who would be very anxious to have her daughter attend a party at the Collins plantation.

“Could you ride by in a few days, Nathan? I will give you my answer then.”

He kissed her again, rekindling the flames, his hand sliding around her waist, aching to touch the tempting swell of her breast, but not daring just yet. This time, there was no giggling, snooping child to make them draw apart, only the furious beating of two flaming hearts, pounding in unison, stirred and driven by the passion swelling between them.

Reluctantly, he drew away. “I’ll come by, Katherine, and I’ll be praying that you’ll tell me you’ll go to the party with me.”

Shyly, she held his hand as they left the barn and walked to his waiting horse. Mounting, he spurred the animal into a trot, turning to wave before disappearing in a swirl of dust.

Turning toward the house, Kitty hugged herself with delight, finally breaking into a run, her skirt swirling about her ankles. Nathan Collins had kissed her, had invited her to a party, asked if he could court her, and he had kissed her again.

At that moment, Kitty Wright felt that life was wonderful, that she was the happiest she had ever been in all of her eighteen years…that chilly day in early November, eighteen hundred and sixty.

Chapter Two

“Why do you keep staring out that window?” Lena noticed that Kitty was keeping a vigil. “And why won’t you tell me about Nathan’s visit? You two stayed in that barn such a long time it didn’t look proper.”