Love Blooms in Winter (28 page)

Would that be fair to Jake or herself?

H
er unsettling thoughts lay heavy in Mae’s heart as she set the wicker basket on a makeshift table. She walked over to Fisk and asked, “Where do I start?”

Minutes turned into hours. The sounds of steel hitting steel filled the snowy night air. Lil made a steady rotation with the coffee pot, serving up the black steaming liquid by the gallons. Mae watched her friend pause in front of Fisk.

“I suppose you want another cup. It’s your fifth.”

“Just fill the cup, Lil. I don’t need you keeping track of how much coffee I drink. It’s none of your doin’.”

Mae laughed to herself when Lil silently mimicked his words. Fisk turned and stared at her. “You say something?”

“No, sir. Just pouring your coffee.” Lil tipped the pot and filled the cup to the rim.

He eyed the exaggerated level. “You did that on purpose. I can’t pick up the cup without spilling it.”

“I did?” She tipped the pot and added a few more drops.

When Fisk sprang to his feet, Mae intervened. “Children. Must I send you to your rooms?”

“Be fine with me.” Lil glanced at Mae. “I’m freezing my socks off out here.” She moved on, politely filling all the workers’ cups to the proper level.

Ever so slowly, the tracks began to take shape.

Close to three in the morning, Mae took a break. Her back ached from bending, and she couldn’t feel her hands or feet anymore. She found the picnic basket and hunted Tom down. He needed to stop and eat.

“There’s still a lot of track to finish before Tuesday.” Even so, he followed her to the locomotive.

“Folks have to eat.”

Tom had set the shifts to four-hour periods because of the extreme cold. Mae had taken a break earlier, but she knew he hadn’t. He’d been working almost twenty-four hours straight. The effort was going around the clock. While some men worked, others would sleep so the work never ceased.

“I’m almost too cold to be hungry.” He found a place to sit and motioned for her to join him. She unwrapped a sandwich and handed it to him. He took a bite, pulled the sandwich back, studied it, and then brought it again to his mouth.

“What’s wrong? Isn’t it good?” She probably should have warned him Pauline made the sandwiches, especially as she tended to get her ingredients mixed up.

“It’s okay.”

Mae bit into her sandwich, pleasantly pleased with the taste. Pauline had done a good job this time. The eggs actually looked and tasted like something that came from a hen.

“In fact, it’s good,” he amended, wolfing the first half down.

Eating in companionable silence, Mae gave in to exhaustion. She wanted to tell him about Pauline’s shattering revelation, but words failed her. Lack of sleep and bone-numbing cold stole her courage. Her life had been so simple a week and a half ago. Impregnable. Contented. She studied Tom’s features from the corner of her eye. Why him? Why had he come along now? A couple of years ago she could have done something about her need for him. Why was the need suddenly eating her alive?

“Mae?”

Startled, she focused on her half-eaten meal. “Yes?”

“I’ll be leaving Thursday.”

Hammering noises faded into the icy distance and silence settled around her. There was a strange ringing in her ears, and her stomach suddenly felt sick. “I thought as much.” When he turned to focus on her, she intentionally avoided his eyes. She couldn’t cry in front of him, not when she had accepted another man’s ring. Her empty finger reminded her of the token of Jake’s love that she’d left in the dresser drawer.

She couldn’t go back on her answer to Jake. Her father taught her that a person’s word was their honor, yet marrying one man and being in love with another hardly seemed honorable.

Would she do God a disservice by carrying on the charade? Wasn’t it possible that once Tom left she’d settle down and realize that what she was starting to feel for him was purely fascination? New man in town. Single man from a big city. Warm, fun to be around. Sighing, she looked at his handsome face and admitted softly, “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too.”

His response came back so quietly she barely heard the words that washed over her. Jake was the only man who’d ever courted her. She didn’t know this frenzied feeling that raced through her blood like lightning had even existed until now. And she had to ruin the moment. He needed to know he was right, that though her intentions were pure, she’d brought him here needlessly.

His voice broke through her thoughts. “You think Jake will marry you soon?”

Surprised by the question, she sat up straighter. Did she think Jake would marry her soon? Though not intended, he made it sound like a kindhearted concession. Tom never spoke about Jake unless he was picking on her. “I don’t know. As I told you before, Jake wants to take a little time—”

“That doesn’t concern you?”

“I thought it would.” She shook her head. “Oddly enough, I’m also in no hurry to marry.”

“To marry—or to marry Jake?”

Anger flared. “Why would you ask me such a thing?” She both liked and disliked his unpredictable nature. Even if the unthinkable would happen, and he would express feelings for her, they’d make a terrible couple. She wasn’t proud of her stubborn side, and he sure had his own mule-headed moments. They would be Fisk and Lil all over again. But it didn’t really matter. He was leaving and she wasn’t. Why beat the subject to death?

“Why can’t you answer me?”

“Because…it’s obvious. I’ve waited six long years for that man to propose.”

“And now that he finally got around to it, you feel you’ve reached your goal—but wait. Is marrying Jake still your goal?”

Her head whirled from the interrogation. She was relentlessly pursuing the same idiotic questions, but he had no right to doubt her intentions. He would get on a train Thursday morning and be out of her life with a turn of wheels, while she would remain here and marry a good, solid provider.

It seemed she was more in love with the idea of marriage than marrying Jake and loving him as a husband. Who made the better choice? Tom would go home to a small room in a house that wasn’t his. She would marry Jake, and eventually they would build the nicest, biggest home in town—which wouldn’t take much. Two stories would be a mansion in Dwadlo. Hopes of Tom remaining here, marrying her, and forming a family with her—a loving, caring, and devoted family that included Jeremy and Pauline—vanished like her breath in the cold air.

“Tom, are you asking me not to marry Jake?” There, she’d put the problem—if one existed—back on him.

Resting his head on the back of the locomotive, he answered with his eyes shut. “What if I am?”

“
Are
you?” Mae held her breath.

He sat up straight and opened his eyes. “I can’t ask you not to marry Jake, Mae. You accepted his proposal and his ring. I was just wondering if that’s still your goal in life.”

She didn’t know how to answer. She’d never been more confused. What was her goal? At the moment she had no idea. She remained silent.

“That’s all the answer I need. I guess right now all we have left to talk about is Pauline. I don’t plan to desert her. I suppose after all that I’ll have to take her to Chicago with me. You, Jake, and Jeremy can have your lives here in Dwadlo. As badly as I hate to say this, Jake’s all right. He’ll take care of you and Jeremy and provide everything you’ll ever need. I’ll warn you right now that he’ll get rid of the dogs and cats, but I suppose you can live with that even though it will upset Pauline.”

His concessions offered little consolation. She knew Jake was basically a decent man. Yet she also suspected he would dispose of the animals swiftly. Why had it taken a silly ring to bring out her true feelings? She met Tom’s gaze. “I know you would never desert Pauline. You’ve been good to her, Tom. So very good, and I thank you for that from the bottom of my heart.”

“Isn’t that what kin does? Takes care of one another?”

“About that—”

“Tom!” Fisk yelled. “We got a problem over here!”

Setting his hat more firmly on his head, he dumped the remains of his coffee into the snow and then rose to his feet. “It’ll be a miracle if we get this track down by the deadline.”

Then he was gone. She hadn’t had time to tell him about Pauline. A missed opportunity, but perhaps a mixed blessing. For the remainder of the night, he’d still look upon her kindly.

Darkness gradually faded into a cold dawn. Tom sent the late shift home to sleep, and a fresh crew set to work. In the daylight it was easy to see obvious progress, which boosted morale, and the workers sang as they worked.

Mae returned to town and unlocked the store around seven. Since the accident her whole schedule had been off. The woodstove that sat in the corner burned bright, so Dale must have come back to stoke it and make the pot of coffee that scented the air. She paused and warmed her hands and feet. The night at the site was the coldest she’d ever spent. As tired as she was, she thought she’d be able to accommodate the few customers expected today, as most everyone was either asleep from the night shift or working at the site.

The telegraph machine started to click. She ran around the counter and into the cage to receive the message.

S
ENDING TRAIN EARLY
S
TOP
H
ERRING MUST BE THERE ON TIME
S
TOP
W
ILL WAIT AT TEMPORARY SITE
S
TOP

Shaking her head, she walked to the machine and wrote down the message. Poor Tom. The railroad wouldn’t let up on him. He was working as hard and as fast he could.

She turned when the front door opened and saw that Tom was there. Striding to the stove, he warmed his hands. She shoved the telegram into her pocket, grabbed two clean mugs, and joined him. “A wire just came in for you.” She set the mugs down and poured fresh coffee into them.

He picked one up, frowning. “From the railroad, I’m sure.”

“I’m afraid so.” She removed the piece of paper from her pocket and handed it to him.

He scanned the message, his eyes narrowing. “They can’t be serious.”

“Seems they don’t know what to do with the herring.”

“Clive is getting nervous. He doesn’t want to be stuck with all that fish.”

“You can’t blame him.” She took a sip of her coffee and watched him as he mulled over what she’d said.

“True, but as hard as we’ve worked, we still won’t have that rail laid until late Wednesday evening.”

She wrapped her hands around the warm mug. “Then there’s nothing to worry about. We’ll post a notice saying that the station will reopen no later than Thursday morning. The herring can be delivered, you can return to your job in Chicago, and I—”

“Will marry Jake.”