Read Love Charms and Other Catastrophes Online
Authors: Kimberly Karalius
“Another scrape. This will definitely give Aunt apoplexy.”
Juliana hugged the cliff ever closer and tipped her head slightly so that she could glance over her shoulder. Her high-waisted ivory dress was deeply soiled across her right hip, where she had slid across the earth as she dropped over the edge.
Juliana shifted slowly and glanced over her other shoulder. Fortunately, the left side showed no signs of distress, and her lilac sarcenet spencer could be brushed off easily. She would do it now were it not for the fact that her hands were engaged, holding tightly to the tangle of roots that kept her from falling off the tiny ledge.
Juliana continued to scrutinize the damage to her wardrobe with regret, not for herself so much as for her aunt, who seemed to deem such matters of great importance. Unfortunately, her eyes wandered down to her shoes. Just beyond them yawned an abyss. It was all too apparent how far above the crashing waves of the English Channel she wasâand how very small the ledge.
Despite squishing her toes into the rock face as tightly as possible, Juliana's heels were only just barely accommodated by the jutting amalgamate. The occasional skitter and plop of eroding rocks diving into the depths of the brackish water did nothing to calm her racing heart.
Juliana swallowed convulsively. “Most embarrassing.” She shivered despite a warm April breeze. “I shall be considered completely beyond the pale if I am dashed upon the rocks. Aunt will be so uncomfortable. Most inconsiderate of me.”
A small shower of sandy pebbles rained down on Juliana's flowery bonnet. She shook the dust from her eyes and listened. She thought she had heard a voice.
Please, she prayed, let it be a farmer or a tradesman, someone not of the gentry. No one who would feel obligated to report back to Grays Hill Park. No gentlemen, please.
“Hello?” she called out. Juliana craned her neck upward, trying to see beyond the roots and accumulated thatch at the cliff's edge.
A head appeared. A rather handsome head. He had dark, almost black, hair and clear blue eyes and, if one were to notice such things at a time like this, a friendly, lopsided smile.
“Need some assistance?” the head asked with a hint of sarcasm and the tone of a â¦
“Are you a gentleman?” Juliana inquired politely.
The head looked startled, frowned slightly, and then raised an eyebrow before answering. “Yes, indeed, I amâ”
“Please, I do not wish to be rescued by a gentleman. Could you find a farmer or a shopkeepâanyone not of the gentryâand then do me the great favor of forgetting you saw me?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“I do not want to be rude, but this is a most embarrassing predicamentâ”
“I would probably use the word
dangerous
instead.”
“Yes, well, you would, being a man. But I, on the other hand, being a young woman doing her best not to call attention to herself and bring shame upon her family, would call it otherwise.”
“Embarrassing?”
“Oh, most definitely. First, I should not have gone out in the carriage alone. Carrie was supposed to come with me, but we quarreled, you see, and I got into a snit, andâ” Juliana stopped herself. She was beginning to prattle; it must be the effects of the sun. “Second, if I had not been watching the swallows instead of the road, I would have seen the hole before my wheel decided to explore its depthsâvery scatterbrained of me. And third, if I return home, soiled and in the company of a gentleman with no acquaintance to the family, I will be returned to Hartwell forthwith in shame. All possibility of a Season and trip to London will be gone completely.”
“Well, that is quite an embarrassing list. I do see the problem.”
“Is there someone down there?” another voice asked.
The head with the blue eyes disappeared, but Juliana could hear a muffled conversation.
“Yes, but she does not want to be rescued by us. She says she needs a farmer.”
“What?”
Juliana leaned back slightly to see if she could catch a glimpse of the other gentleman, but that dislodged a cloud of dirt.
“Achoo.”
“Bless you,” one of the voices called from above before continuing the conversation. “Yes, it seems that we are not the sortâ”
Juliana's nose began to itch again. She scrunched it up and then wiggled it, trying to stop another burst. To no avail.
“Achoo.”
This time her left hand jerked with the force of the exhaled air and broke several of the roots to which she was clinging. Slowly, they began to unravel, lengthening and shifting Juliana away from the cliff's side, out into the air.
Looking for more charming Grimbaud adventures?
Learn the full story of Zita's defeat and how Fallon and Sebastian defied fate in
Kimberly Karalius
's first novel
Love Fortunes and Other Disasters
.
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Check out their e-novella,
First Kisses and Other Misfortunes
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KIMBERLY KARALIUS
is the author of
Love Fortunes and Other Disasters
and its sequel,
Love Charms and Other Catastrophes
. She holds an MFA in fiction from the University of South Florida and has been sharing stories on
Figment.com
with a strong following of enthusiastic readers since the site's i
nception. Although Kimberly lives in sunny Florida, she prefers to stay indoors and sometimes buys a scarf in the hopes of snow. She loves watching really old cartoons and silent films. Being in Florida certainly has one big perk: going to Disney World. Which she does. Frequently.
kimkaralius.com
. Or sign up for email updates
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Contents
Chapter 4: Impressing the Principal
Chapter 5: The Questionable Dating Game
Chapter 7: The Unfortunate Accident
Chapter 9: Skin and Signatures
Chapter 11: The Right Kind of Mood
Chapter 12: The Bells of Grimbaud
Chapter 14: New Heart, Old Heart, Real Heart, Fake Heart?
Chapter 15: They Say Lovesickness Is Incurable
Chapter 18: Heart-to-Heart Talk
Chapter 19: Spoken and Unspoken
Chapter 20: It's All in the Chase
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Copyright © 2016 by Kimberly Karalius
Excerpt for
Love, Lies and Spies
copyright © 2016 by
Cynthia Ann Anstey
Swoon Reads
An Imprint of Feiwel and Friends
175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010
All rights reserved.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data