Love Inspired December 2014 - Box Set 1 of 2: A Rancher for Christmas\Her Montana Christmas\An Amish Christmas Journey\Yuletide Baby (69 page)

She'd certainly given him enough food for thought where permanently adopting Noelle was concerned—and she'd made him promise not to make any rash decisions. Nothing compared to a good woman challenging a man to step up and face adversity head-on. He was definitely thinking about it now, opening his mind to the possibilities of the future.

All
the possibilities. He just didn't quite know what his life would look like yet. He felt as if he were on the verge of a discovery that hovered just out of his reach. There were blank spaces he had yet to fill in.

The sound of car tires crunching on the gravel in his driveway not only surprised him, but also gave him a moment's hesitation. He wasn't expecting anyone, and the last time he'd had an unanticipated visitor, it had been his father.

Just what he didn't want to deal with today.

Steeling himself for the worst, he tossed one last pitchfork of hay into the nearest horse's stall, shifted Noelle to fit more firmly against his chest, adjusted his hat lower on his brow and exited the barn. If it was his dad, it was better just to get the confrontation over with.

But it wasn't his father's beat-up vehicle that had pulled up in front of his house. It was Heather's SUV, and she had all her kids with her.

He didn't care that she'd come unannounced. In fact, he was relieved. If she was here then she wanted to see him. And if she wanted to see him...

A smile split his face and his pulse burst to life, and he knew exactly why. He was seeing his favorite people. Heather and her children made his life here on the ranch complete.

He'd been trying to fill in the blanks in his life, but until he saw Heather, he hadn't realized that the missing pieces of the puzzle were the people who'd come to mean more to him than anything in the world.

He rushed forward to open the door for Heather, trying not to give away the gymnastic backflips his heart was currently performing. He wanted to tell her everything he'd learned about himself—and how he felt about her—but this wasn't the right time or place. They had their little tribe with them right now, and that was what was important.

The right time would come. He just knew it.

His smile widened even more, if that were possible. His whole world was opening up. It was as if the day had suddenly dawned on him and he could see everything around him, crystal-clear and sparkling.

Until he saw Heather's face.

She wasn't smiling. Her eyes were glassy and red. Her complexion had faded to a pasty white. And she was visibly shaking.

The ground dropped from under him as he reached out his arms to steady her. “Heather, honey, what's wrong?”

Her lips thinned and she shook her head. “Not here.”

The children. Of course. Whatever was bothering her, she didn't want to share it with the kids around to hear.

He opened the back door and unbuckled Henry while Heather used the opposite door for Jacob and Missy. With his heart in his throat, Shawn herded the three out to the back to play with Queenie, and then he settled Noelle in her crib. Thankfully, she was sound asleep and probably wouldn't waken from her nap for a while.

He wasn't sure he wanted to hear what Heather had to say. Both grief and determination were evident in her gaze, and she hadn't yet said a word.

This was serious.

He joined her in the kitchen and poured each of them a cup of coffee, and then slid onto the chair opposite her. Neither one of them spoke, and tension was thick in the air between them.

She was unhappy. It sliced his heart into tiny pieces to see her this way. Especially if he was the cause of it.

Maybe she was trying to figure out a way to let him down easy. Had she spent the past two days wondering how to gently tell him to take a hike?

He couldn't stand to see her this way. He wanted to reach out to her, to thread his fingers with hers, but he was afraid that would be exactly the wrong thing to do in these circumstances—whatever they were.

He should just make it easy for her.

“About the other day...” he started, then stopped and tried to clear the huskiness from his throat. How did a man apologize for a moment that he considered one of the best in his life?

“I saw Adrian.”

Her declaration hung in the air for a beat and then plunged into his lungs and gutted his rib cage.

“What did you say?” He must have heard her wrong. “I thought Adrian was in prison—for a long time yet to come.”

“Yes, well, evidently not.” Her voice was laced with sarcasm, anxiety and, above all, anger.

“Tell me.” Shawn didn't think twice about reaching across the table and taking her hand. Not now. Her fingers clung to his like a lifeline.

She related the story of how she'd seen Adrian in the parking lot of Sam's Grocery. How he'd been staring straight at her but hadn't approached. How she'd called the police but the man had disappeared.

How she knew he'd be back.

Shawn's determination to protect her grew with every word she spoke. If this Adrian guy thought he was going to stalk Heather or intimidate her—or worse—he had another think coming.

Shawn wasn't about to let Adrian anywhere near the woman he loved.

“Why do you think he's here?” Cold settled into Shawn's gut and the muscles across his shoulders tightened. With the amount of adrenaline pumping through him, he hoped she wouldn't feel him quiver.

“Honestly, I have no idea. I didn't think he'd be out of prison so soon. It's in his best interest to stay as far away from me as possible.”

“You'd think.”

“But he's not. Which means he's got a real problem with me. Who knows what a man in that state of mind might do? He's already broken his permanent restraining order, and probably violated his parole, as well. I requested advanced warning for his parole hearings, but somehow I didn't receive that notice. Maybe there was a glitch in the prison system. And the most frightening part of this whole experience was that I had the kids with me in the car. To think that their being with me might put them in any danger— It makes me sick to my stomach.”

She wasn't the only one feeling that way. Shawn's gut was roiling.

“What are the police doing about it?”

“Everything they can. Slade said they put out an APB on him, and I was able to give them quite a bit of information as to what they're looking for. They're scheduling a patrol car to run by my house on a regular basis. If they see him and pick him up, he's going straight back to jail.”

“That's not good enough.” Shawn shook his head vehemently. “You and the kids aren't safe as long as that guy is lurking around.”

“No,” she agreed. “We'll never really be safe. Not ever. I thought after the divorce I wouldn't have to see Adrian again, but now I realize I'll never be rid of him. Even if they send him back to prison, he'll eventually get out again. Everything has changed now.”

For the worse.

Shawn wasn't about to let Heather lose everything she'd worked so hard to gain.

“I can't have someone watching over me 24/7, so I'm really out of options. I feel like I ought to hold off on signing those adoption papers.” Her hazel eyes flooded with tears. “He's going to be a permanent nightmare for me.”

Adrian's threat would haunt her for the rest of her life.

Shawn couldn't let that happen.

“There's another way.”

The revelation didn't dawn on Shawn—it knocked him over. The solution was simple. Right before his eyes.

“Yeah? What's that?” She sounded unconvinced, but he supposed he would, too, if he were in her position.

“Marry me.”

“What?” She practically choked on the word.

“Marry me,” he said again, emphasizing each syllable.

She made a sound halfway between a chuckle and a sob. “Nice try, mister. Thank you for your attempt to lighten the mood.”

Lighten the mood? Did he not look serious?

She wasn't getting it. For a man who communicated for a living, he was doing a poor job of it. Marrying him would fix everything. He had to make her see that.

He stood and moved around the table without releasing her hand. He didn't want anything between them. Not now. He wanted to be near her, to touch her and make her believe. He took a seat in the chair next to her and placed her palm on his chest, over his heart.

“I'm not joking, Heather. Think about it. It makes sense for us.”

“You think?”

“You and the kids would be able to stay with me, where I could watch over you all. You wouldn't be alone at night or vulnerable to an ex-husband who doesn't know when to quit. You wouldn't have to worry anymore. Not now. Not ever.”

She sniffed and shook her head. “I've got to admit you make it sound tempting. But I didn't come here this afternoon expecting a marriage proposal.”

Shawn wondered if she could feel his heart slamming in a mad rhythm against her palm. The proposal was more than him protecting her from Adrian. So much more.

“Think about the children.”

“I
am
thinking about the children.”

He'd made her mad. Why was she mad?

“We can be a family. All six of us, and eventually we can have more of our own, if you'd like, or even keep adopting. The kids love the ranch. They'll be able to grow up here, learn all about raising animals and taking care of the land. It makes sense for us.”

She pulled her hand away and dragged it down her face. He'd never seen her look so bone weary. It pulled at him.

“Can I think about it before giving you my answer?”

“Of course. I'm not trying to pressure you. All I'm asking is for due consideration that you'll take me seriously.”

“You've got that. I promise.”

“I've got pastor friends in the area. We should have no problem finding someone to hitch us up on short notice.”

“Short notice?”

“The sooner the better, don't you think? With Adrian in town, who knows what will happen. We don't want him catching up with you when you're alone.”

Way to not pressure her, you jerk.

Shawn wanted to kick himself. If he was trying to scare her off, he was doing a mighty fine job of it. Reminding her that Adrian was a present threat instead of assuring her that he would protect her and the kids.

“Do you have someplace you can stay until we get this sorted out? A friend or neighbor?”

She stood and moved to the coffeepot, pouring herself a fresh cup and then checking out the window on the children before returning to the table. She leaned her hip against the edge of the wood and crossed her free arm over her waist instead of returning to her seat.

“I don't want to impose on anyone like that,” she said. “You know how much of a handful the kids can be. Besides, I need to face this.” She sounded as if she was trying to convince herself. “I'm not a victim any longer, and it's high time I stopped acting like one.”

Was that a
no
?

Shawn's heart twisted as he waited for her to elaborate. Surely she wasn't turning him down, not without taking more time to think about it.

Please. Not a
no
.

“I'm going home.”

That was even worse. “Think about what you're saying. It's not safe there. He probably knows where you live.” She might not be ready now—or ever—to make a commitment to him, but he wasn't going to step aside and let her walk right into the vortex of danger.

“I'm not an idiot.”

“I didn't think you were.”

“I'll take every precaution,” she assured him. “I'll keep the doors locked and my phone on me. And I'll call the police the moment I see him. Adrian is a mean drunk, but he's only as intimidating as I let him be. He's used to a shell of a woman who won't fight back. I think he's going to be surprised to find that's not who I am anymore.”

“He's been in prison. Who knows what kind of man he is now? He could be truly dangerous, Heather. Worse than he was.”

“You're right. I don't know what kind of man he is now. But if I run from this, I will be running my whole life. Don't you understand? I can't do this anymore.”

“If he shows up at your house?”

“I'll call the police and he'll be arrested. At least then I'll be able to rest easy again—for a while, anyway.”

Shawn thought it was a bad plan. The most awful one he'd ever heard, in fact. For starters, he wasn't part of it. And he could count on two hands the number of things that had the potential to go wrong.

And yet—it seemed that Heather had turned a corner. Her weariness and the desperation she'd worn like a cloak for as long as he'd known her had disappeared.

Replaced by determination.

Strength.

Belief in herself.

How could he take that away from her?

She hadn't come here to have him solve all her problems. She'd come to regroup and solve her own. And she had.

He loved her enough to let her see this through, but he couldn't completely let go. He had to do all he could to protect her.

“My number is on speed dial, right?”

She smiled softly. “Number one.”

“Good. Don't be afraid to use it. For any reason. Day or night. Whatever you need, I'm your man.”

“Thank you for that.” She blushed, making her countenance even more lovely.

His pulse heightened, and he wanted to take her in his arms and kiss her senseless, prove he meant every word he said in his proposal. Convince her she really should be with him. It was all he could do to hold himself in check when she brushed the back of her hand against his cheek.

“I'm going to round up the children. It's time for us to go home.”

“Heather?” His arm snaked out to capture hers. She turned, an unreadable look on her face.

“Yes?”