Read Love Inspired January 2016, Box Set 1 of 2 Online
Authors: Carolyne Aarsen
Saul shot her a puzzled look and Chloe decided to stop her questioning. No need to draw attention to herself.
The horse she held nickered and she glanced back to see Grady trying to lead the other horse with one hand and handle his crutch with the other. The horse he was leading balked, his crutch clattered to the floor and he stumbled, grabbing the horse by the mane to right himself.
Chloe took a step toward him to help, then heard Saul clear his throat as if warning her.
She caught his look then turned away, pretending she hadn't seen what had happened, though it bothered her deeply to see this proud man so helpless.
Maddy, intent on getting every last bit of dirt out of the horse's hoof, thankfully didn't know what was going on.
A few moments later Grady joined them, his crutch under his arm again, leading the horse. “I'll tie him up here,” he said, breathing heavily.
Chloe fought down a beat of frustration. Why couldn't this man see he needed her help?
But until he agreed, she could do nothing.
“I think we're done with Charger here,” Saul said to Maddy. “I need to trim the hooves, but I'll have to do that on my own.”
Just then a noise behind them drew Chloe's attention. Mamie walked toward them holding Cody.
“I'm sorry,” Chloe said, feeling suddenly guilty for spending time out here. She held up Charger's halter rope. “Can someone take him? I need to get Cody.”
“I'll hold the rope. You can go,” Maddy said.
“I just came out to tell you that I got a call from the hospital,” Mamie said as Chloe took Cody from her. “Ben's temperature is up. I know we talked about going tomorrow after church, but I'd like to go today.”
“I'll take you,” Grady said.
“I have a few things to get ready yet,” Mamie said, her hands worrying each other. “If that's okay?”
“No problem.”
Mamie hurried back, leaving Chloe and Grady behind.
Cody gurgled at Chloe as if he recognized her, and suddenly lurched away from her, his chubby hands flailing.
Chloe almost lost her balance, laughing as she realized Cody wanted to touch the horse. “Ah-dah. Ah-dah,” he squealed in excitement.
Charger nickered, then leaned toward Cody. Chloe brought him closer and he reached out, his plump fingers batting at the horse's nose. Charger didn't so much as blink.
“I think he likes the horse,” Maddy said.
“Son of his father,” Saul said.
Chloe caught Grady's frown, wondering if he was thinking of Ben, Cody's father.
Grady touched the little boy's cheek with a large forefinger, the simple gesture warming Chloe's heart. Then he pulled away. “We better get going.”
He walked back down the wooden alleyway. Chloe easily caught up to him and slowed her pace to match his.
Chloe glanced at the empty horse stalls. “Why don't you keep the horses in here?”
“We only use the stalls for the mares that are in foal. Sometimes we'll put a couple of the stallions in here. They cause nothing but trouble when they're out,” Grady said, stopping at the stall that held the horse that had watched Chloe's progress earlier. “Hey, Sweetpea. You going to give us a nice little baby in a while?”
“She's in foal?”
“Due in a few months, as are Babe and Shiloh. Ben had them all bred to a cutting horse. He had plans to...” His voice faltered and Chloe gave into the impulse and put her hand on his shoulder in comfort. The news from the hospital must have been weighing on his mind.
To her surprise, he covered it with his own hand. Large. Warm. Welcoming.
He looked over at her and once again Chloe felt the emotions that had risen up between them that night in Cody's nursery.
Cody's squeal inserted itself into the moment, returning Chloe to reality.
“He sure seems to like horses,” Chloe said, disliking how breathless she sounded.
“Like Saul said, son of his father.” He looked over at her again. “I'm glad you're here to help take care of him. I know it's a job to you, but with what is going on with Ben and all, it just makes that part of our lives easier.”
He gave her a careful smile and her breath quickened.
Another wave of nausea washed over her, her own reality making itself known.
“Are you okay?” Grady asked. “You look a little pale.”
“I'm fine. Just tired, I think.” When she'd seen the doctor before leaving Fort Worth, he hadn't seemed too concerned about the nausea. She knew she would have to make another appointment to see him soon. She could mention it then.
She walked ahead of him, her lips pressed together, holding Cody close as if to protect him.
She wondered if she was wise to encourage him to work with her and how she could maintain her distance while she did.
He was far too appealing and growing more so every day.
CHAPTER FIVE
H
e had forgotten about the stairs in the church.
It was Sunday morning and Grady and his grandmother had been making their way across the foyer to the sanctuary, chatting with fellow members, catching up.
And now he had to navigate these carpeted stairs.
“We can take the elevator if you want,” his grandmother said with a bright note in her voice.
He knew Grandma Mamie was only being helpful. But he didn't know which would be worseâriding the elevator with dear, eighty-year-old Iva Donovan and her walker or running the risk of stumbling on the stairs.
“I can manage at home. I'm sure I can manage here.”
Though as he took the first stair, he wished once again he hadn't given in to his grandmother's pleas this morning to come to church with her and Chloe. He was far too aware of the crutch he needed for support and the sympathetic glances he got from people who stopped to say hello. And he was fairly sure church would be a waste of time. He'd seen too much of the darkness of life to believe that God even cared what happened on earth.
“Are you okay?” Mamie asked, resting her hand on his arm.
He just nodded and was about to take the next step when he felt a hand on his shoulder. “Hey there,” a deep voice said.
Turning, he faced Tyler Grainger, an old school friend now married to his cousin Eva.
“So glad to see you here, buddy,” Tyler continued, giving him a rough, one-armed hug.
Tyler pulled back, looking into his friend's eyes as if trying to see what Grady had witnessed during his time overseas.
You'd never understand
, Grady wanted to say.
“So how are you finding married life?” Mamie asked Tyler, rescuing Grady from replying to Tyler's unspoken question. Grady was thankful. He didn't want to discuss his lack of spiritual fervor in the foyer of the church. Especially not with a man who at one time had wielded strong influence in Grady's faith life.
“It's wonderful,” Tyler said. “But Eva does miss working with Cody. Though I heard you have a new nanny.”
Tyler gave him a knowing look at the same time Chloe joined them. If his injury made him self-conscious, Chloe's presence only increased that emotion.
As did Tyler's discreet poke of his elbow.
“Don't you need to find Eva?” Grady asked.
“Right. I should go,” Tyler said. But he gave Grady a wink and jogged up the stairs ahead of him, a vivid reminder of the physical differences between them. It was hard not to feel frustrated or less of a man.
Grady took a breath and worked his way up the stairs, Chloe right beside him, looking everywhere but at him. It seemed every moment they spent together alone only increased either his awareness of her or her retreat from him. Yesterday, when they'd stood by Ben's horse, he'd thought they had shared a small connection. Then she'd pulled back. She'd stayed home when he and his grandmother had gone to the hospital, claiming Cody was fussy. This flimsy excuse had netted him some direct questions from his grandma as to what he had done to her.
As far as he knew, he had done nothing more than cover her hand with his. Clearly a mistake, because she hadn't so much as made eye contact since then.
“Do you think Cody will be okay in the nursery?” Mamie was asking Chloe as they reached the top of the stairs and the entrance to the sanctuary.
She nodded, her gaze meeting his, then skittering away. If she was this jumpy around him after spending a few days together, why should she be surprised that he wasn't about to start physical therapy with her?
“He's settled in nicely. Of course, it's familiar to him,” Chloe said, brushing at the skirt of her dress and fussing with the belt she had put on. She looked uncomfortable, as if she wished she were wearing something else.
“Well, well, look at my friend. Looking all pretty and pert in her cute dress.”
Lucy Benson joined them, her bright eyes flicking from Chloe to Grady, as if he might be the reason Chloe had made this transformation.
“I told you I owned a couple of dresses,” Chloe said, sounding a bit short.
Lucy patted her on the shoulder. “And now you've proved it.” She glanced over at Grady. “How are things back at the ranch?”
Grady heard the subtext in her question. “No thefts yet.”
Lucy just nodded. “That is intriguing. Do you have any idea why?”
“Maybe whoever is stealing feels sorry for my brother.”
“Maybe. But I doubt it.” Lucy gave him a cheeky look, then turned back to Chloe and frowned. “You feeling okay? You look a little green.”
“And with just two comments you've effectively negated anything positive you just said,” Chloe returned.
“Give with one hand, take away with the other. That's what the long arm of the law does,” Lucy said with a grin. “Anyhow, I gotta go. Promised my mom I'd help her out with coffee this morning.” With a flip of her blond hair and a wave of her hand, Lucy was gone.
“She's certainly a ball of fire, isn't she?” Mamie said, her tone admiring. “Always on the job.”
“A bit too vigilant,” Grady mumbled, not certain he liked Lucy's insinuations. He didn't know why the Stillwater ranch hadn't been robbed yet, but he guessed it was simply a matter of time until they were hit. He doubted they would be on the receiving end of any largesse on the part of the Little Horn Robin Hood.
“Can we go sit down now?” Mamie asked. “I want to make sure there's enough room for the three of us,” she added, beaming as she looked from Chloe to Grady.
Grady wasn't sure he liked the satisfied look on his grandmother's face. As if seeing Chloe and Grady together made her happy. He was fairly sure she had hired Chloe for more than nannying and therapy, but he wasn't about to confront her on that.
They found their place at the end of the pew, situated in the center of the sanctuary. Grandma and Grampa Stillwater had laid claim to this spot when they'd married, and through the ebb and flow of the Stillwater family, it had become “theirs.”
Grady stood aside while Grandma and then Chloe entered. Which meant he would be sitting beside Chloe.
He sat down slowly, easing his way into the seat, trying to find a place for his crutch. It fell; he bent over to pick it up and tried to lean it against the pew in front of him. Wordlessly Chloe took it and laid it on the floor at their feet.
“Thanks,” he said, giving her a smile.
She returned the smile and there it was again. The awareness that sparked between them like a live thing.
This time she didn't look away as quickly.
The pianist began playing and a group of young kids came to the front. With a clang of chords from a guitarist and the piano, they started singing. Grady didn't recognize the song, but it seemed Chloe did. She sang along, her voice bright and clear and melodious.
Grady clung to the sound, the purity of her voice easing away the memories that plagued him from time to time. Reminding him of a happier time when he and his fellow soldiers had been on leave in Kandahar and had stopped to listen to a street group singing. A young girl, her voice as clear and true as Chloe's, had been singing, laughing and dancing. It had been a bright spot in that particular tour.
A day later everything had changed.
He stifled the dark thoughts, massaging his leg, clinging once again to the music to which Chloe sang along.
“âMy hope is only in
Y
ou, Lord, my solid cornerstone, my strength when I am weak, my help when I'm alone,'”
she sang.
Grady closed his eyes as the words soaked into his soul. When the song was over he glanced at Chloe. She returned his look, a sidelong grazing of her eyes over his. But her smile lingered in his heart.
And he wondered if he dared let what he sensed was happening between them grow.
He held that thought and then Pastor Mathers came to the front of the church. He looked around, smiling as he welcomed the gathering, his blue eyes shining with friendliness. He made a few jokes, then asked everyone to bow their heads to pray.
His prayer was the usual invocation asking God to bless their worship time. To watch over them as they opened God's word. He also prayed that the past events of the community would not turn people against each other and that, instead, everyone would come together to help and support one another.
As the pastor prayed, Grady felt again the uneasiness that gripped him as he thought of the thefts that had been going on. It was making people testy.
Pastor Mathers finished his prayer and invited the congregation to turn to their Bibles. Grady followed along as the pastor read from
Isaiah
40. He tried to listen but he was distracted by the beautiful woman beside him, her eyes on her Bible, a faint smile teasing her lips as if the words she read pleased her. He pulled his attention back to the pastor in time to hear him read,
“âEven youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint
.
'”
Pastor Mathers closed his Bible and looked over the congregation, pausing as if to let the words settle into their collective mind. “In our culture and society these verses can be tough to swallow. We want to be strong. Independent. These are qualities we admire in ourselves and other people. But as Christians this is not how we are called to live.”
Grady looked down, struggling with the pastor's words. It was as if the sermon were tailor-made for him.
You're a soldier
, he told himself, mentally arguing with what the pastor said.
You have to be tough and strong. Weakness is death.
But you're not a soldier anymore.
The other voice, the practical one he had spent the past few weeks ignoring, sifted back into his thoughts.
Didn't matter. He had to be strong. His brother was in the hospital. His grandmother needed him. Cody needed him.
He looked over at Chloe, who was looking at the pastor, her face holding a peculiarly skeptical expression.
As if she, too, struggled with the sermon.
Again he sensed she was keeping something to herself and again he wondered what.
In spite of his curiosity, he shook off the thought. He had enough going on in his own life. He didn't need to take on anything Chloe was dealing with.
* * *
“I miss you, buddy,” Eva said to Cody, holding him close. The murmur of the people visiting after church rose up around the table they sat at in the hall attached to the church. Chloe felt a pang as she looked around the room. She recognized many of the people here, and as she and Eva chatted, a few members of the congregation stopped by to give her their greetings.
It was home and, for now, she was thankful for a job that kept her there.
“I think he misses you, too,” Chloe said, reaching over to wipe some drool off his chin.
“Poor little motherless guy,” Eva said. She looked over his head at Chloe, her expression curious. “I hear that Vanessa is gone. What do you think that means?”
That I don't have to put up with her condescending attitude.
Chloe simply shrugged. “I think she didn't like the fact that Grady was on to her lies.”
Eva shook her head in dismay. “I sure hope we find out who he belongs to. Every baby needs a mother and father.”
Chloe's heart skipped in her chest as she took Cody back from Eva. And what of her baby? She swallowed down a knot of panic, reminding herself of the song she had just sung. God was her refuge and fortress. He would guide her through the precarious place in her life.
“And Grady is most definitely not the father,” Chloe said, settling Cody on her hip. He tried to grab for her necklace but she caught his hand, kissing his chubby fist.
“I'm sure that's a relief,” Eva said with a coy smile.
Chloe pretended she didn't understand, unwilling to analyze her changing feelings for Grady. Sitting beside him in church had been more difficult than she had expected. She saw how earnestly he had listened to the pastor. How he had seemed to be pondering the message.
The same message that struck a chord with her. After she'd discovered that Jeremy hadn't returned to give their marriage another try as she'd believed, but had simply come to toy with her emotions, she'd promised herself she wouldn't let any man have any control over her again. She wouldn't let any man make her feel weak.
Yet now she was in a position of weakness, and though she didn't like it, she also knew it made her more dependent on God's guidance and provision.
All through the sermon she had kept wondering how Grady heard the message. Then she became frustrated that all her thoughts circled back to him.
“So, barring any other Stillwater coming out of the woodwork, I would guess that leaves Ben as Cody's father,” Eva continued.
Chloe pulled her attention back to Eva and nodded. “It would seem that way.”
“I just want to tell you how glad I am that you're helping at the ranch,” Eva said, moving in closer as if she had some deep secret to impart. “Grady seems happier than when I saw him last.”
Chloe frowned. “What do you mean?”
Eva gave her a mischievous smile. “I think you know what I mean. Though Grady has devoted himself to the army, he always said that one day he wanted to settle down at the ranch. Find himself the perfect girl and raise the perfect family.”
The perfect girl.
That certainly wasn't her anymore.
Then across the room she saw Grady talking to Olivia Barlow, widowed mother of three children. Olivia brushed back her dark brown hair as she caught the hand of one of her triplet sons, frowning down at him as if warning him. She looked tired, and Chloe didn't blame her. The thought of raising her child on her own frightened her. She couldn't imagine doing it with triplets. Grady patted Olivia on the shoulder, as if in sympathy, then said something to the young boy. When Olivia left, Grady looked up, unerringly finding Chloe across the room. Their gazes locked. Chloe's breath slowed and her heart raced. She pulled her eyes way only to find Eva watching her with a bemused expression.