Love Is Blind (2 page)

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I don’t know how much time passed by me but something pulled
me out of my dozing state. I guess, I must have slept, when a husky
voice called, straightening myself up, I heard, “Kiran,” came the
whimper, more like a moan. As if the boy recalled his condition and
all the incidents that had taken place, I heard him shifting on the
bed and coughing, and then a big sigh of exhalation before the
question popped out of his mouth, “ Who are you? Where is Ruhi?”
not a friendly sort of person, I thought as I cleared my throat and
said, “Ruhi is getting some eatables from the canteen. I am her
friend, Sonam.” There was silence for some moments.

He must have realised his way of speaking because I heard a
little note of remorse in that voice of his, before he said, “Hi, I
am Suraj.” “I know,” I smiled a little as I added further; “You are
the latest topic of conversation these days between your father and
Ruhi.” a small sound of giggle left his mouth, as he said, “You are
one weird girl. I am extending my hand in front of you and all you
can do is sit back and smile. Are you blind?” I kept a hand on my
mouth, so as to stifle my own laughter. Silly boy, I thought.
Giggling unto myself, I said, “Yes, I am blind. Can’t you see,
silly?” He must be in shock. Thinking that I am jesting, I heard
him speaking. “How many fingers are these?” “Are you deaf?” I
asked, as I shook with laughter, this time not being able to
control myself. “I said, I am blind and all you can do is asking me
to count your fingers. I can’t, till the time I actually feel them
against my own hands.” finally convinced of my blindness, his
guilty tone was back. “I am sorry, I really am. I thought you were
joking.” “Why would I joke on something like that?” I asked. “So,
you are Ruhi’s friend?” he asked, as if amused by the mere fact.
“Yes,” I said, there was silence again. Neither of us knew what to
say next.

“
Suraj,” I said, “We have just met, and being a stranger I have
no right to say anything in your personal matters. Life is the most
precious gift given to us by Lord Almighty. You should not discard
it by killing yourself. I know little about your life but you have
so much worth living for, then you think you do. Live for your dad,
for the people who love you so much.” “Yes,” he sighed, “It was a
very stupid thing on my part. Kiran got so much offended by this
act. I will have to apologise to her too.” Oh my God, I thought,
the boy took the girl as alive! “Suraj,” I said, “Kiran is…” “Oh,”
Ruhi came behind me, “So, you awake? Are you troubling my friend?”
she asked as she came to my side and handed me a cold beverage in
my grip.

As I took a sip of the chilled juice from the can by the help
of the straw, he said, “I would not even dare.” Humour was clearly
evident in that voice of his. “Just getting myself familiarised
with her, I will see more of her in future, won’t I, Sonam?” I was
thrown off by this statement of his. What, I thought, what was
that? Without reading too much in the sentence of his, I smiled and
nodded in agreement. “Yes,” I said, “We will.” “After all,” he
concluded the meeting with these words, “we are friends now and
Kiran will be most delighted after meeting you, won’t she Ruhi?”
Ruhi’s grip tightened on my shoulder, as she said in the pure
delighted masquerade, “Of course, she will”

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“
This is wrong,” I said, as I tightened the blanket hold around
my shoulder. Ruhi was sitting beside me, on my bed. Clock had
struck eight in the evening, and after finishing my dinner, Ruhi
and I, had our after dinner conversation.

My head had been spinning today with that meeting. Suraj is on
the precipice of losing his sane mind, I am sure. But the thing,
which really had me shaken to the core, Ruhi and his father, were
not helping him in waking up from the slumber where his mind had
stumbled upon. He was not at all ready to take this reality that
Kiran was no more, still breathing in that hallucination. “You
should do something Ru,” I said, “Please, don’t let the boy fall
off his mental balance. Wake him up.” “I tried,” her voice sounded
helpless, even wobbly, as she continued, “Even uncle tried, but
every time, we tell him something like that, he gets all in rage,
furious, even violent. This suicide attempt was his second one.”
“Second one?” I got alert, “You don’t mean…” “Yes,” she sighed,
“Yesterday, after I have gone back home. I went to his house where
I saw him painting on his old canvass. He was painting Kiran’s old
photo. I got all boiled up inside. In my rage, I tore the thing and
yelled at him, shook him, shouted on top of my lungs that she is
dead and she is not coming back…” she stopped, as I heard her
taking a hiccup. Moistening her throat by gulping some water, she
spoke again, “And the result of this, he is in the ICU today. I
feel, as if it is my entire fault for dumping the reality on him,
he is already hurting so much. I believe, deep inside he knows what
the reality is but, he does not want to accept the thing.” “But, he
will have to” I said, “Someday; he will have to accept it.” I could
just hope that the day will come earlier than expected.

**********************************************

Night fell and spread its blanket over all the living beings.
Sleep came late to me so; I was thrown on the floor when I heard my
phone ringtone, again. I searched through my pillow’s side, when I
laid my hands on it. Pressing the green button, I said, “Hello,”
“Mita, is this you? People say, you will no longer talk to me but I
know you well enough, sweetheart. You again, didn’t turned up today
in the park, when you promised me that you will come. Mita, don’t
do this to me. I am begging you. I’ll die. Right now, a gun is kept
near my head. If you disconnect the line, I will press the trigger
and the shot will split my head in two.”

Such pure, un-adulterated fear went through my entire being,
one second I was lying head down on the bed and the next, I was
shivering from top to toe and had clutched the receiver with my
both hands. The person, whoever was on the other side, had suicidal
tendencies. Before, I could think over, the words spilled from my
mouth, “Bobby, don’t you dare. Keep the gun down.” “Only on one
condition,” he spoke again, “If you promise to meet me, this time
for sure. No more ignoring me, alright. We will meet and then will
sort out all our grievances and differences, alright?” “Bobby,” I
hesitated again, “Please, listen to me. I am not your Mita. I am…”
“Excuses again? I told you not to play those tricks with me, love.”
“Bobby, please…” “No,” he said, agitated, “Mita, I said. No. More.
Excuses. You are coming tomorrow,” “Bobby listen,” I said, “How
about I meet you on weekend? In this way, both of us will get more
time to talk, what say?” he must have been thinking because, after
a slight pause, I heard his voice again, “ Ok fine, but weekend,
remember.” Saying that, with a click the line went
silent.

*******************************************

After the phone call, it was next to impossible for me to go
back to sleep. My mind, was fully awake till now, and still reeled
on that last talk. What should I do? Should I call the cops, tell
them about some suicidal maniac who is taking me as his beloved?
Still, something about that voice had me in a hypnotised state,
till now.

If I tell Ruhi, she will get all tensed. What should I do?
Where to go? Taken the time till weekend for I was not sure what to
do? God, please help me. Who is this Bobby? Who is this Mita, after
whom he is ready to give his life? He must had been deeply in love
with this girl, my mind said. What is up with the world these days?
Don’t people have anything else on their hand apart from falling in
love? Suraj, who had lost his love once, was not ready to accept
the reality.

Then this Bobby, who was offended because the girl was not
reciprocating his interest back. Who appeared some kind of psychic
person to me. My mind felt like exploding. I should tell Ruhi, my
heart said. Nobody among the sister’s should know about these
calls, lest my outings will be curbed too! At least Ruhi will
understand, trusting on the thought, I closed my eyes and tried to
sleep.

***************************************************

“…
so this is the story.” I finished my tale, and took another
sip from my drink. The weather was pleasant today. I felt it in the
air. Classes, as usual, had ended on their usual time. Ruhi too is
done with her teaching session for the day. So, both of us decided
to take some time out of our professions. I had narrated every
single detail of previous night and night before in Ruhi’s
ear.

She seemed shocked by my revelation because till the time I
ended, I felt some negative vibes coming from her side, telling me
this is so not a reaction I am looking forward to. “Ruhi,” I said,
“Say something. What do you think, I should do?” “This person, what
is his name, yes, Bobby,” she paused, as if giving a deep thought,
“ Did he told you anything else regarding his life? Any other
specific tale, some titbits’…?” “No,” I sighed, “I had even thought
to end the call but, he warned me not to cut the line.” “Do one
thing,” she clicked her fingers, “Simple enough, change your
number. Don’t answer the call or put your phone to switch off.” “I
should,” I shook my head, “But the point is, what if the person
actually tried something stupid? What if he went forward with his
plan and killed himself? I won’t be able to live with myself for
the entire life, simply thinking on the fact that I could have
saved someone’s life and I did not do so.” “You are getting worked
up for no reason, Sonu.” She said, “He is a maniac, you got me.
Someone psychic enough to end his life… Leave him, I say. Don’t
waste your brain on a no-brainer.” “What you say is practicable
enough, but…” I left the sentence on that.

This was the problem. I feared the unknown. “Do you think I
should go to meet him, I mean this weekend….?” As if I have set
fire to dry grass! Ruhi prowled on me like a wild wolf, shaking me
from top to toe.

“
Have you completely, utterly lost your mind, Sonam?” she said,
“And here I thought, you were the most sensible person, out of two
of us. Of course No, and if you even tried to do that then, I will
inform the sister’s about this. Then you can kiss you freedom day’s
goodbye. You do know that you are being considered for the
sisterhood training, don’t you?” “I know,” I became all furious
with her. Why was she acting like that? As if, I was a kindergarten
kid, playing in the sandpit…Somehow, I could not shake the concern
I had built up for this unknown caller!

******************************************

My days are fine enough. I am busy in my classes, sometime
even I have call from Suraj too who would invite me to his house,
if he wanted someone to talk or simply, if he is getting
bored.

His “You should meet Kiran” talks always made me restless for
some anonymous reason but I am careful enough not to show on his
face. Once, when he has held my hands in his, a funny feeling in
the lower part of my abdomen surfaced. It is a healthy friendship,
I am sure but maybe I am reacting like this because nobody ever
took my hand like this.

I mean to say, a man never treated me like this. I wanted to
do something for this person; I wanted him to come back to his
present life and live to its fullest but was that possible? The
person, who’s bearing so much hurt in his life, was it even
possible to make him believe in himself, again? I have no answers
to these questions but, one can always try.

The night part was unbearable and troublesome. Bobby (Yes,
even though Ruhi has advised me to change my number, I simply could
not) has given me another of his weekend ultimatum’s because I have
not gone to meet him in the previous one.

I feel a connection to him, but why? My life, if you ask me,
is a mess which has no solution, for the time being. Suraj or
Bobby, Oh God, these two names are topmost these days on my set of
problems. I wanted to help them both, but the million dollar
question is, how? Like this, eight weeks flew by me.

But in these weeks, the connection, the bond of trust which
has originated between me and Bobby is much higher and deeper than
what I shared with Suraj. Bobby has calmed down. The pretence of
being Mita, which is being played by me, has somewhat relieved him
from the mental trauma he has been experiencing previously. He is
much cheerful, joyful then the first time.

My meetings with Suraj have gone to minimal but I am not upset
by the fact. But you know what, if even for one night, I did not
hear Bobby’s voice, I started getting restless. He also must be
knowing about this thing because one day, when he asked me this,
“Mita, tell me truly, will we ever meet, because the way you have
evaded our meeting not one, but two times! I don’t think, we will
ever come face to face. Do you remember the time when we first met
each other, in Rahul’s party?” of course, I had no idea who this
Rahul is but, as usual, I played along, “Yes, I do.” And with this
came the greatest problem. Presumably, Bobby and Mita have seen
each other. Of course, that’s how the affair must have begun, isn’t
it? I could just feign my voice, pretend to be Mita but, in no way,
can I appear right in front of him.

He knows Mita by face. And me! I am not Mita and cherry on the
top, I am blind! How will I identify him and not some duplicitous
person? How will he identify me? Of course, he will never even look
at me. One month passed in this grave confusion swirling in my
mind. Finally, one day, when I had enough of this façade, I managed
to tell Bobby regarding our first meeting. “Bobby, how about I meet
you this Saturday? Cliff point?” silence spread for a minute.
“Fine, but love, I had been to your home today. Have you shifted
your location?” of course, I thought, he must be knowing the
residence of the girl too. “Yes,” I said, “I have but I will tell
you about it when we’ll meet, ok?” “Ok, I will be wearing a red
rose in my pocket, so be on time. Bye. Love you” he said, “Fine.
Bye. I love you too, Bobby.”