Love on the Ledge (19 page)

My heart thunders in my chest. I think about what Lucky said, that I might still have feelings for Bradley. I keep thinking about him, that’s for sure. I know that when someone is part of your life, they leave a mark, whether bad or good. I know that I can’t keep comparing guys to Bradley forever. Sometimes the hurt has to fade, even if it doesn’t disappear.

“Hello?” I answer.

“Sky!”

It’s strange hearing his voice. I haven’t even let myself listen to the voicemails he leaves me. It’s like a memory that’s fading, and I find myself straining to recall the details of his face.

“Bradley.”

There’s silence. He didn’t think I’d pick up. I didn’t think I would either. Now we aren’t sure what to say because we’re both surprised. At least I still know how his mind works.

“I heard you’re in town.”

“Guess Luck’s still mad at me.”

My eye twitches a little bit. I can picture him leaning back and smiling as he speaks.

“I guess so.”

“Baby—”

“Don’t.” I sigh. Something inside of me hurts again. I know that men cheat. I know that women cheat. I know that there isn’t a science, and that you’re hoping that it doesn’t happen to you. I know that when it does, you’re more ashamed that you didn’t notice, or you didn’t want to notice. I’m ashamed that I’m ashamed. That I shouldn’t feel that way because I did nothing wrong.

“I’ve missed you so much. I’m going nuts without you.”

“I’m sure you’ve survived well enough.” I chuckle. The first few weeks, I missed him so much I thought about making a U-turn on the Queensborough Bridge and going back to Boston. But I didn’t.

“I need you—” I start to say.

“I need you too baby.”

“No, Brad. I need you
to listen to me
.”

He scoffs.

“I need you to stop calling me. I need you to go back home.”

“Sky, Sky, Sky. Why can’t you just forgive me? Why can’t we go back to the way things were?”

“Because I saw you! Because I
saw
the way you were with her. For weeks I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with you. I thought that I wasn’t making you happy. Do you know what that’s like? And sure enough you were happy. It just wasn’t with me.”

I can hear the frustration in his voice. “I made a mistake. You and I belong together, Sky. I know it. We’ve invested too much time in our relationship to throw it away.”

“You’re talking about us like we’re stocks.”

“You’re different, Sky.”

Maybe I am. I stayed with him for that reason…the investment. I didn’t stay for love. And I’m not staying now.

“I am different,” I say. I’m leaving a career behind. I’m not afraid of not knowing my next step. Just kidding, I’m terrified. But at least I’m confident that I want whatever my next steps bring me. “But you know what? I’m the only one out of the two of us who needs to be okay with that.”

“We’re not finished,” he says. “I love you. I still love you.”

“Don’t you get it? We were over long before I left. You ended us.”

“But—”

I’ve had enough. Something in my chest starts to swell and I know I have to let go. “Goodbye, Bradley.”

I hang up and hold my phone to my chest. I nearly jump out of my skin when I feel someone standing behind me. River pulls a drag on her cigarette. She doesn’t say anything, just nods, like she’s proud of me.

I’m proud of me, too. I run up to my room and make myself comfortable. I find the number I was looking for before I got interrupted. Watching the phone ring gives me butterflies, and I decide that I love the feel of it.

He picks up on the second ring. “I was just thinking about you…”

When everyone is packed away in Pepe and Tony’s SUVs, Hayden pulls up to the driveway. He washed his truck so you can see the bottom half of it. Leti and River both whistle as he steps out of the car and walks towards us.

He’s wearing a crisp white shirt and dark blue jeans. The spice of his aftershave tickles my nose when he kisses my cheek. He rakes his hair back over and over again.

“Damn boy,” Leti says. “You clean up real good.”

“So do you,” he tells her.

She picks up the hem of her flower print dress and curtsies.

River feels left out. “What about me?”

“You, River Thomas, are stunning.”

She gives him a sardonic smile, like she doesn’t believe him. River is River, and will never not wear a black band shirt and ripped shorts. Her aviators hide the dark circles under her eyes, and a thick leather wristlet hides a bruise where that brute Will grabbed her.

“Sky,” Hayden turns to me. “You look—”

The cars, stuffed with my family, honk at us. “Hurry it up!”

“The wine isn’t going anywhere,” Leti shouts back.

We file into Hayden’s truck. He backs up and, because he’s more of a local than any of us, leads the way. I watch his face the whole time. It’s disappointing to see him wearing a shirt, but the fabric does beautiful things to his muscles. He’s like candy waiting to be unwrapped and licked down to the core.

“God, you’re sick in love,” River says, watching me watch him.

“Shut up.” It’s the best comeback I have, because she’s right. I am sick. Sick in the head with feelings for a boy who is too good to be true. A boy I might not see after this summer.

At the vineyard there are, surprisingly, zero cars in the lot. It’s a perfectly beautiful summer day and it’s still tourist season.

“Is it open?” Leti runs up the driveway to the main door.

Pepe and Tony walk up holding hands.

“I called last night,” Tony says, “to tell them we have a large group coming.”

Hayden heads to the front of where my family looks like a mob ready to storm the vineyard. I don’t miss the way Maria’s eyes linger on Hayden’s ass. Can’t really blame her. All of his body parts should be immortalized in a statue. In my room.

“Hey,” Hayden tells them, standing directly in front of the double doors. “Hey guys. I’m Hayden. Most of you remember me from falling through the roof.”

Half of the family laughs.

Pepe gives me a side eye and winks.

“Is he actively trying to die?” River whispers.

“What are you doing?” I hiss at him.

Then an older couple comes out. They hug Hayden like old friends. The lady hangs a sign on the door that says. “Closed for private event.”

“You’re here!” the old man says. “Welcome…come in. We’re all set up for you. You must be Tony and Pepe.”

He walks up to my uncles and shakes their hands. “Hayden told me you’re the party that placed the wedding order. This is Clara, my wife. We’re happy to have you, even on such short notice. Hayden’s like the son I never had. We’d do anything for this boy.”

Uncle Tony has never looked so perplexed in his whole life. “Thank you so much, but I’m confused.”

Hayden is right at their side. “Sorry, Sean. I wanted it to be a surprise.”

Sean’s eyes widen. “So you all have no idea what’s happening.”

Tony wraps an arm around Pepe. The two of them chuckle. “No, but we do love surprises.”

“Hayden, do you want to tell them?”

Hayden smiles. The wind plays with his hair. The sky frames him perfectly, and in this moment I feel like falling.

“Happy Wedding Week,” Hayden tells them. The he looks at me when he says, “I know it hasn’t been as smooth as you wanted it to be, but I hope this helps. You have the place for the next two hours.”

Tony and Pepe pull Hayden into a massive hug. Everyone claps a little, even Maria.

One by one, they follow Sean and Clara into the house. River and Leti bring up the rear, holding their thumbs up to Hayden.

“I can’t believe you did that,” I tell him, reaching for him. “How did you make this happen?”

He shrugs, like it’s not a big deal. “I know everyone, and they love me.”

“I can see that.”

“No, really. Sean’s hired my dad’s company for years. Over that time, he and Clara took a liking to me.”

“You’re amazing.” I land a kiss on his cheek. He presses me closer to him so I can feel him get a semi against my hip.

“
You’re
amazing.” He takes my hand and leads me inside. “Shall we?”

• • •

For two hours we drink wine. Pepe and Tony are showered with champagne (literally) when the girl behind the counter accidentally shakes it too much and loses her grip on the cork. It goes flying into the air and Yunior catches it, prompting him to shout, “I’m next!” like he just caught the bouquet.

Hayden doesn’t drink and stays close to River, who has her arms crossed over her shoulder because she has to sip on water.

“If I have a sip,” she says. “I might just puke. But I deserve it.”

Hayden takes a bottle of sparkling water and fills her cup. “At least we get a little bit of bubbles.”

Maria takes a seat with Las Viejas along the counter. They question everything, even though none of them know anything about wine. I might just die when Aunt Cecy asks for a little bit of sugar to put in their vintage rosé.

“Keeping it classy in 2014,” I say, holding my glass to Leti’s. She clinks.

“I think they’re great,” Hayden says.

“You don’t have to spend every day with them,” Leti says. “Well, you sort of do. But you get to have all the girls try to bring you snacks ‘round the clock.”

“Everyone except for your mom,” he whispers in my ear.

Now that it’s not a secret that there’s something going on with Hayden and me, I walk him over to where my mom is perched making a face at a dry glass of cabernet.

“Ma, this is Hayden. You already know him, but I just wanted to re-introduce you.”

He holds his hand out. I dare my mother to look into his eyes and not be smitten.
I dare her.

She smiles despite herself. “Thank you for doing this. It wasn’t necessary.”

“No, I think it was,” he says.

“
Lindo,
” Aunt Salomé says, pinching his cheek, then fans herself. “
Esos ojos
.”

“Right?” I say in agreement.

Hayden looks confused so I translate for him.
Those eyes.

“Oh,
muchas gracias
.” He nods at her, and when I feel like we’ve spent too much time standing awkwardly in front of them, I pull him away.

“Don’t worry about her,” I tell him. “She’ll come around.”

He bites his lip. It bothers him that my mom isn’t fawning over him the way everyone else does, but my mother’s a tough nut to crack. I’m pretty sure the only person she’d like instantly is the Pope, and only because she’d be afraid to go to Hell if she didn’t.

“We have a very untraditional arrangement,” he says. “So I suppose I’ll have to wait.”

“Look at my family,” I say. “As much as they try to hold onto tradition, it doesn’t last for long. You have Leti, who travels the world and has teeth bling. You have Elena and Juliet, who’ll be the first in their family to go to school out of state. You have my uncle marrying his long-time partner. Then you have me…”

He reaches for me and I stare at his hand like it moves in slow-mo. Hayden’s big, calloused hands are everything I want right now. He twirls a lock of my hair around a finger.

“Yeah,” he says. “I have you.”

The way he looks at me makes me want to forget that I’m surrounded by my family. But then I realize my mom is looking at us. I give him my most charming smile.

“We’re the modern family,” I say.

A burst of laughter draws our attention to the great window facing the vineyard. The younger cousins have made their way out to the rows and rows of grapes. They’re warned not to pluck any, but I’m sure one or two of them have stolen a grape from the vine. The nasty surprise will be when they bite into it and get nothing but sour fruit.

Over on the lawn, Steven and Elena take selfies, then take turns balancing full glasses on their heads.

“You can’t take us anywhere,” I say.

As much as I want to be embarrassed of them, as much as I want to be mad at them most of the time, I love them. All of them. Even Maria. Well, sometimes Maria.

“I’m glad you’re having a good time,” he says, brushing my cheek. He hasn’t stopped touching me since we got in the car. I’ve never been so PDA in front of anyone, let alone my relatives.

“We’re having an excellent time,” Uncle Tony tells him. He and Pepe come in from their tour of the vineyard outside. His cheeks are pink from the various reds he’s tried. He holds Pepe around the waist. Seeing them together always warms my heart.

Pepe takes Hayden’s hand. “You’re a different person when you’re not covered in sweat. I don’t know which one I prefer.”

“
Pepe
,” I say.

“If you ever want to try your hand at some modeling, you’d be perfect for next year’s spring line. Very construction-worker-meets-surfer cool.”

I look up at Hayden. When did we go from hiding on a roof to holding hands in front of my family? Part of me is warning me that this is too fast. But a bigger part of me, the hermit side that hid all summer, is happy to stand in the sun. No matter how long it lasts.

“I’m okay,” he says. “I like working with my hands.”

“I hope you continue to do more woodwork,” Tony says. “The gazebo is coming out beautifully.”

“Just wait. It’s almost done. I want to make it perfect.”

Tony and Pepe look at each other and share a small kiss. “Well, we’re glad you came into our lives, even if you had to fall through the roof to do it.”

“I’d do it all over again.” He squeezes my hand.

“I’m just happy to see our Sky smile like that.” They toast to Hayden.

I feel like I’m in a dream. And if I am, I don’t ever want to wake up.

The two hours fly by. It’s strange introducing a guy who isn’t my boyfriend to my family, but he gets the boyfriend treatment, which is confusing. Or it
would
be confusing if Hayden didn’t look like he was enjoying himself so much. There isn’t any of that awkwardness because he knows just what to say. He talks Yankees with my cousins and offers Uncle Felix advice on the best way to get siding on his house in Florida. He lets my aunts feel his hair. He’s doing everything he humanly can to please my family. The truth is, though, he doesn’t have to. I told him that. But he’s doing it anyway, and that makes my feelings for him deepen hard and fast.