Love & Redemption (37 page)

However, considering the way he’d acted ever since that night in the cellar, Shelley wasn’t sure Gavin still wanted to be her husband. In the chaos of the past couple weeks, Shelley hadn’t had a chance to speak with him seriously or alone. He said he was kept busy with the training program Nick set up for him, learning to shoot a gun and some self-defense techniques to be more effective as a field agent. While she understood the logic of better training for him, part of her realized Gavin used it as an excuse to avoid her. The problem was, she couldn’t figure out why.

Unless it was the usual reason. He changed his mind about being together, just like the other men she’d been with.

Nick and Jenessa walked into the room, pulling in extra chairs from Jenessa’s room and placing them near the doorway. Even though Shelley hoped Gavin would sit beside her on the bed, he hopped onto the vanity counter.

Nick took his seat. “It’s good to have you out of the hospital.”

“You’re lucky she is.” Carlie glared at him from across the room and brushed short blond hair from her eyes. Even though she acted mad, Shelley could tell she was trying not to smile at her fiancé. Carlie just couldn’t stay angry with Nick. “If you’d let something happen to her, I’d never forgive you.” Carlie turned to Janet. “She’s the sister I always wanted. Did she tell you that? You raised one heck of a great woman. She saved my life.”

Janet had the grace to blush, considering she didn’t have much to do with the few good qualities Shelley managed to acquire. Then again, she showed up as soon as she found out Shelley was hurt. That had to count for something.

If the lurking suspicion Shelley had about her ongoing health problem was right, it might be a good thing to have her mom close.

Shelley hadn’t told anyone yet, but for the past several days she felt increasingly sick, throwing up at random smells or just about anything. She didn’t think anything of it at first, figuring it was the pain medicine, but then her period didn’t start yesterday. She had always been regular before. While it could be the stress of her captivity, she talked to the nurse, who took a blood test and promised to call with the results as soon as they came in.

In the meantime, Shelley switched to only taking plain Tylenol for her pain, stopping the narcotics immediately. No one seemed to notice or think it odd, even though Shelley felt terrible pain and her back still spasmed from all the kicks to her spine. She also needed surgery on her knee in a few weeks, once her preoperative tests were complete. That might have to wait.

Nick winked at his fiancée, not fearing Carlie’s anger. No one seemed to notice Shelley was acting odd, and she tried to focus on the people around her and not her health concerns.

“Time for business,” Nick said, turning his attention to Shelley. “It’s pretty bad news. We only caught Stephen. Everyone else cleared out before we found out where you were.”

While Shelley didn’t want to think about Stephen anymore, it couldn’t be helped. “Will he live?”

“He got out of the hospital before you did. They took him to Rikers Island while he waits for a trial. The evidence against him is solid, and Brent Walker’s singing like a canary to save his own ass.”

Shelley snuck a glance at her friend. Carlie’s face did pale slightly at the mention of Stephen. It would have been easier for them all if Gavin was a better shot. Dead men couldn’t get free and cause problems later.

That brought her full circle to worry some more about Emma. She hadn’t seen the girl since the day after their rescue, but she sure hoped Brent wouldn’t get free either. “Brent’s going to prison, right, even if he’s talking?”

Nick nodded. “He’s going to a low-security facility for twelve years. Even if he gets released early, he’ll never get his daughter back.”

That was the important thing. Emma was safe. Shelley already missed the little girl, but she wasn’t hers to keep and nothing could be done about that. “So, what happens now? I assume Paul’s plotting to get the diamonds back. Do you have any leads of where he might be? Are my parents safe in their house?”

“We’re watching your parents’ house, just the same as we keep an eye out for S.A.T.O. in Sayle. They’ll be okay, I promise. As far as where Paul went, I have a few ideas.” Nick glanced at Gavin. “I have some jobs for my newest agent, for sure. He really proved himself out there.”

Shelley forced a smile, trying to act pleased for Gavin. He looked happy about the prospect of more work, so what else could she do. Part of her wanted to blurt out the news about the test she waited on and beg him not to be an agent, but he didn’t seem to want her anymore, so what would it accomplish?

“Don’t worry about missing your husband too much.” Carlie winked, correctly interpreting Shelley’s silence. “I’m healing real well from my surgery. As soon as you’re back on your feet, we’ll open the new Carlie’s Creations and you’ll be plenty busy.”

Feeling as if her smile was chiseled onto her face, Shelley turned to her friend. “That’s great.”

“Yep,” Gavin agreed with a sullen tone to his voice Shelley wasn’t used to hearing. “Your life will get back to normal. Almost like this whole trip never happened.”

What did he mean by that? Shelley needed some alone time with Gavin when he couldn’t escape. Her faith in their relationship was fading fast.

***

Nick announced that Carlie had enough excitement for one day, traveling all the way to New York and then sitting up visiting. “It’s time we went to our room and got rest. Shelley needs to rest too.”

Gavin glanced at the door, wondering if he could make his escape when they did. He wasn’t ready to talk to Shelley. Right after they rescued her, things changed. Gavin couldn’t help but worry. Shelley needed a man around full time, not just one who’d come through town once in a while when he finished a job.

She’d made it clear in the beginning that she wanted someone to love her unconditionally. Someone she could count on to be with her always.

He had planned to be that man, to refuse the job with Nick and do whatever it took to make a living while being with Shelley. However, the more he thought about it, the more he knew neither one of them could live that way. He would eventually feel bad that he wasn’t doing more to contribute to their financial situation, and even if Shelley tried to deny it, she’d never be happy with that in the long run either.

The only solution was to go to work for Nick and let Shelley go. If she was still tied to him while he worked for Paul, there was a chance they would take her again at some point to get whatever Paul wanted. Gavin couldn’t put her at risk like that. He would continue searching for a way to be with her, but in the meantime, he shouldn’t tie her down. If she found someone else before he found a solution to his work problem, he’d have to accept that.

His heart contracted with pain as he contemplated that course of action again. He wished there were another way.

Around him, everyone said their goodnights and Gavin stood. “I’m going to let your mom stay with you tonight, Shell.”

The room went quiet at his words. Everyone turned to look at him.

“You don’t want to stay?” Shelley asked. “This is my first night out.”

At the same time, Janet said, “Don’t be silly.”

“It’s fine,” he said. “I’ll take the room next door that we rented for her. You guys need some time together.”

“Gavin...” Shelley’s eyes clouded over, looking suspiciously misty. “I guess if you think that’s best.”

No, it isn’t
, he wanted to scream. He forced a smile. “I do. Enjoy your time together.”

Carlie and Nick exchanged a long look, and then Carlie sat back down. “I think I’ll stay for a bit longer.”

It appeared everyone in the room knew what Gavin was saying—that they were over. Shelley literally looked sick. In fact, she was pale.

No one said anything and the silence became unbearable. “Okay, then.” Gavin tugged at the collar of his t-shirt. “I guess I’ll go.”

The room phone rang just as Gavin reached the door. Despite himself, he turned to see what was going on. Shelley had been waiting on some blood tests. Gavin didn’t know what they were checking for, but she had seemed worried all day.

She picked up the phone. “Hello?...Yes, this is Shelley.” If anything, her face grew paler as she listened to the person on the other line. “I understand. Yes, thank you for calling.” She replaced the receiver and leaned back in the bed, closing her eyes.

“Who was that?” Carlie asked, scooting to the edge of her chair.

“Just the nurse from the hospital.” A bright smile crossed Shelley’s face, but it didn’t look natural to Gavin. “My blood work’s all fine.”

Carlie settled back slightly. “Well, that’s good news.”

“Yep. Looks like I can head back to Sayle with you guys.” Shelley glanced over, her big blue eyes meeting his.

Even sick and pale, she was so beautiful. How could he think of breaking things off?

She lifted her chin slightly. “Goodnight, Gavin. Take care of yourself out there at your new job.”

He knew a dismissal when he heard one. Shelley’s anger was obvious, and everyone in the room sensed it. They all stared at him with varying degrees of hostility. He let himself forget that these were Shelley’s friends and family, not his. When push came to shove and they realized what he intended to do, everyone turned on him.

He wondered if he could even count on the job with Nick at this rate. Not that the job mattered too much. He had an even bigger worry. How could he live his life without the woman he loved?

“Wait, Shelley.” Gavin took a step toward her bed. “I think maybe you and I should talk. Let me explain wh—”

“I trusted you, although I really knew better. I never lost my faith, even when Paul offered proof you were screwing Jenessa.” Shelley reached down and rubbed her stomach, a look of pain crossing her face.

“I never did anything with Jenessa.” Gavin hadn’t even known that was a possible concern. “We need to talk. Let me—”

“I already figured  out what you plan to say,” she interrupted. “I don’t want to hear the actual words from you.”

He glanced around the room at her friends all listening in. “Please, everyone, give us a few minutes.”

Shelley wiped moisture off her cheek and turned to Carlie. “Make him leave. I can’t bear to speak with him.”

Carlie nodded. “Nick?”

Nick grabbed his elbow and steered him to the door. “Don’t make this any harder on her. She’s been through enough.”

What else could he do? It would only hurt her more to explain why he wasn’t right for her. He should just make a clean break and let her hate him. It would be easier for her, and that was all that mattered.

***

Carlie shooed everyone from the room once Gavin left, even convincing Janet to go to the hotel’s restaurant and order dinner directly to save on room service fees. Everyone seemed to know Carlie and Shelley needed some alone time, and they all left in a hurry.

“What a piece of dog poop.” Carlie folded her arms and sat beside Shelley on the bed. “How could he be so cold?”

In spite of her emotional turmoil, Shelley grinned. “I’ve always loved how graphic your language gets when you’re angry.”

“Oh, stop.” Carlie stuck her tongue out. “You know what I mean.”

“That Gavin’s an asshole? Yeah, I understand.” Shelley bit back another wave of nausea. “And I’m totally screwed now, because he obviously doesn’t want me. Everyone could tell. Nothing like being dumped publicly.” She stared at her hands, not wanting to meet Carlie’s eyes. “Also, I’m pregnant.”

“What?” A huge smile broke across Carlie’s face and she threw her arms around Shelley’s shoulders. “But that’s great news.”

Maybe for her. She’d always wanted to be a mom, but couldn’t have children. For Shelley, she wasn’t sure how she felt about it. Having Emma call her mommy had been nice in a way. At least a kid would love her unconditionally and never leave...under normal circumstances. Well, at least until the teenage years.

“I’m shocked and terrified,” Shelley admitted.

Carlie waved that concern aside. “Everything will be fine. Nick and I will help you. It is Gavin’s though, right?”

It was sad that even her best friend had to ask, but Shelley tried not to get upset. “Of course it is. We made love when we were trapped at the subway. The nurse says my hormone levels are low still and might not show up on a urine test, but the blood proves it. I’m preggers.”

Carlie clapped her hands. “I’m going to be an aunt. Not every only child can say that.” Her grin was as big as Shelley’s should be.

She tried to feel happy, it just wouldn’t come. “This is a secret, okay? I’m not telling Gavin.”

“You’re not telling...” Carlie paused, the judgmental look on her face clearing after a few seconds. She nodded. “No. From what Nick told me earlier, and the way Gavin acted just now, he’s choosing a different path than a life with you. I’m so sorry.”

It should be the happiest day of her life. Instead, all she felt was depressed. “Can you keep Gavin away from me until we leave? Maybe Nick can send him on an assignment tonight or something. I don’t want to hear his messy breakup speech. I can’t handle it right now.” She let out a bitter laugh. “I might even vomit on him with my morning sickness. I can only handle so much.”

Carlie took her hands and squeezed them. “Don’t worry. You aren’t alone. We’re going to help you through this.” Carlie kissed her cheek. “You’re my family. We’ll be okay. I’ll go talk to Nick.”

Shelley knew Carlie would tell Nick about the baby, but that was okay. He knew how to keep his mouth shut.

As she watched Carlie leave the room, Shelley rubbed her belly. She wondered how long it took to start showing. Probably quite a while. “Looks like it’s just you and me, baby. I hope I’m a good enough mother.”

Chapter Forty-One

A knock sounded on Gavin’s hotel room door. “Now what?”

He didn’t want to face any of them. What should have been a private conversation between him and Shelley turned into a public spectacle. No one said anything, but they all knew. Their relationship was over.