Love’s Journey Home (34 page)

“Listens to you?”

“Jah. He listens. He knows how I feel. He lost his daed.”

“Like you lost your mudder.”

“Jah.”

Gabriel lowered his head, not wanting to absorb the pain in his daughter’s eyes. He
should be the one she shared those thoughts with, but she couldn’t because he worked
and he did chores and he left her to raise his little girls. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” She looked shocked by his admission. “You didn’t do anything.”

“I should’ve been more…here.”

“You do what daeds do.”

“No matter.” He drew a breath. “Edmond is not for you.”

“He’s a friend. We’re too young for courting.”

The words sank in. Could he trust that it wouldn’t become more? He knew too much about
the ways of the heart. He’d fallen in love with Abigail’s mother long before the age
of courting. “If you don’t honor my wishes, we’ll have to move again.”

Her mouth dropped open and she began to shake her head. “Nee. Please. Don’t make us
move. Not again. We’re just getting settled. And Edmond is…well…he’s…”

“More than a friend. Just as I thought.” Gabriel hated to be so hard on her, but her
future, their future, depended on her obeying him. “I’m your father and I’m asking
you to honor my wishes.”

Abigail didn’t reply, but her gaze darkened. She bit a lip and he knew she was doing
exactly what Laura did in those moments they disagreed. Harnessing the words and thinking
ahead to how she could get what she wanted without thwarting his authority. Laura
had been good at it. Good at making him see her way—eventually.

He opened his mouth but before he could remonstrate further, Seth hurled himself through
the doorway. “They’re here, they’re here!”

Suddenly feeling as bashful as a five-year-old, Gabriel followed the children to the
front room. He opened the door. Helen smiled up at him, her face flushed, a pie—lemon
meringue from the looks of it—in her hands. Caught by her pink cheeks, clean-scrubbed
face, and bright brown eyes, he forgot to say anything.

“May we come in?” Helen asked, her smile fading. “Are we early?”

“Right on time.” He meant to sound friendlier, but the words came out flat in his
ears. His conversation with Abigail hung over them. Did Helen know how close her son
and his daughter were becoming? “I mean, come on in, supper is ready.”

Helen slipped by him, so close he could smell the fresh scent of her soap, followed
by the children. Edmond managed to make eye contact before he ducked his head and
rushed past. He didn’t stray too far, but veered toward Seth, who immediately engaged
the older boy in a discussion of what he thought of going fishing after they ate.

Heaving a breath, Gabriel showed Helen to the table while her girls trailed after
Abigail into the kitchen. “Have a seat.”

“How was your day?”

“I can’t do that.”

“What?” Her quizzical expression made her look half her age. “Answer a simple question?”

“Make small talk.” He waited until she sank into a chair and took the one opposite
her on the other side of the table. Having the expanse of wood and tablecloth between
them helped for some reason. “Laura used to say…Sorry. See what I mean?”

“We can’t not talk about our spouses. We were both married before.” She smiled. Her
dimples popped out. “Obviously. You have eight children. I have four. They got here
somehow.”

The tension that held hostage the muscles in his shoulders and neck eased its grip.

“You’re right. Laura used to say I missed the class at school where they taught us
how to visit.”

Helen grinned. “I’m just the opposite. I go on and on until people get annoyed with
me.”

“I won’t be annoyed. If you talk, I won’t have to.”

“That wouldn’t be fair. Isn’t the idea for us to get to know each other?”

“Is it?” He found himself very much wanting an answer to that question. Did she want
to get to know him? “Is it possible for us to set aside…”

“You mean for you to set aside,” she cut in.

“For you to set aside how I’ve acted since I’ve been here in Bliss Creek. I haven’t
been very nice to you.”

“We got off on the wrong foot, that’s all.” She offered her hand. Uncertain, he took
it. “Gabriel Gless, I’m pleased to meet you.”

“Same here, Helen Crouch.”

At that moment the girls began streaming into the room, carrying the bounty of food
Abigail and Mary Beth had prepared. The boys quickly followed, their hands clean and
their hair slicked back with the water they’d used to wash their faces. The room filled
up then and there was no time for personal conversation. The children laughed and
chatted as if they’d known each other all their lives. Helen looked so pleased, she
looked almost at ease. Gabriel found himself imagining what it would be like for this
to be an everyday scene. Their combined families sharing meals.
Whoa, slow down the horses
. What about Edmond and Abigail? What if he decided to move his family with Thomas’s
to Missouri? Did Helen plan to move? How could she stay here if her brothers went?
All these questions swirled around him like a swarm of gnats.

Helen’s gaze sought out his. “This is nice.”

“Jah.”

After the meal had been cleared and the girls began the dishes while the boys went
to do the evening chores, Gabriel got to his feet. What now? The heat in the house
pressed against him. He hadn’t thought this through. Inviting her into his home. What
did he do with her now? She looked at him, her expression so expectant, so unsure.
Did his expression look the same?

“It’s so warm.” She waved at her face with plump fingers. “A walk might be nice. There
might be a breeze down by the creek.”

“There might be.”

“Besides the food was so good, I ate too much. I expect a walk would help me work
it off.”

“Would you like to take a walk?” Feeling like an idiot, Gabriel moved toward the door.
His boot caught on a chair leg. He stumbled. Now who was the clumsy one? “I mean,
I don’t know how much cooler…”

“I’d love to take a walk.”

They took a meandering path down by the creek and into the stand of woods that separated
his property from the Brennamans. Neither spoke until they could see the trickle of
water that had once been a flowing stream reduced by the drought.

“This is nice too.” Helen swiped at a fly buzzing her face. Perspiration dampened
her forehead. “It’s a beautiful evening.”

“You’re not too warm?” He’d been wrong to follow her lead. Better to save walks for
another time, later in the evening when the heat was less oppressive. “Walks in August
aren’t really that pleasant, I reckon.”

“I’m walking with you.” She said the words so simply, so without artifice, that Gabriel
knew he’d been given a great gift. Helen’s gaze traveled over his face to his mouth.
“I’m content.”

“All the same, we’d best not stay out long.” This thing between them—whatever it was—only
served to make his life more complicated. “Who knows what trouble the little ones
are getting into.”

“You’re a good daed.”

“Danki.” Her compliment burned like salt in a wound. If she only knew how he chafed
at his inability to make decisions, his uncertainty about the family’s future. Daniel
had left him. The little girls were growing up without a mother to guide them. “It
doesn’t always seem so.”

“I know. I suffer the same anxieties.”

“And I’ve made them worse with my censure.”

“I’ve made mistakes.” Her face colored. “But I’ve learned from them. You know, Edmond
isn’t a bad boy. In fact, he has a good heart and he’s trying to be a good friend
to Abigail. That’s all.”

“They’re too young.”

“The more you try to keep them apart, the more they’re drawn together.”

“Not if I take the family to Missouri.”

She stopped in the middle of the road. Gabriel kicked himself mentally. He hadn’t
meant to blurt it out like that.

“You’d do that because of my son?”

“Nee. Not because of Edmond. Not only that. I’m trying to figure out what’s best for
them. If Thomas goes…”

“Then why are we here? Why are we taking this walk in this horrible heat?”

She sounded so disappointed. This meant something to her. As it had him. He couldn’t
be sure what. Had he started something he couldn’t finish? His heart did a strange
hiccup. Something he wanted to finish?

“I haven’t decided anything.”

“But you’re thinking about it.”

“Aren’t
you
thinking about it? Won’t you go if your brothers go?”

“I can’t. My mudder’s sight is leaving her and I won’t uproot her. I have my home
business. I can sell at the bakery.”

“What do your brothers say?”

“Nothing has been decided. They think it will be up to them.” She kicked at a rock.
“I’m not sure they’ve thought it through. They haven’t thought of Mudder. They haven’t
thought of me as a woman who can take care of herself. Who has taken care of herself
for a long time.”

“You don’t need anyone’s help.” He had no doubt she could take care of herself. She
didn’t need a man. She didn’t need him. “So you’ll stay.”

“Jah, I’ll stay.” She started walking again. Her gaze stayed on the ground. “I hope
you’ll do the same.”

The last words were spoken so softly Gabriel could barely hear them. He lengthened
his stride to catch up, but she kept her face averted.

He grabbed her elbow but she jerked away. “Helen, nothing’s been decided.”

“You still think of me as the bad mudder and Edmond as a bad boy. We have nothing
more to talk about.”

“I don’t. I’m trying.”

“You have one foot out the door already.”

“Nee. The kinner won’t want to move again. I don’t want to move again. I want to do
what is right for them.”

She said nothing more, instead trudging toward the house, head down, face somber.
Gabriel stayed by her side and searched for something to say. Nothing came. Everything
had been said.

Mary Elizabeth waved to them from the front yard. She and Naomi sat on the front step,
each with a glass of sweet tea. Betsy and Ginny had engaged the younger girls in a
rousing game of tag.

Gabriel managed a smile at the enthusiasm with which they dashed around the yard,
squealing and laughing. “To have that much energy.”

Helen didn’t answer him. She went to Naomi. “Where’s Edmond?”

Gabriel followed her gaze. No Edmond. No Abigail. “Mary Elizabeth, where’s Abigail?”

Mary Elizabeth sighed. Her gaze didn’t meet his. “Edmond took her for a buggy ride.
They took our buggy. She said not to wait up. She said she would give Edmond a ride
home later. Edmond said you shouldn’t wait up either.”

“They said not to wait up?” The slow burn worked its way up his neck and across his
face. “Not to wait up?”

“Gabriel, I’m sorry.” Helen held up both hands. “I gave him a severe scolding before
we came here. I thought he would contain himself. I thought they both would.”

“It’s late. I’d best get these girls to bed.” It wasn’t her fault. Her son had a wayward
heart and no father to set him straight. Still, Gabriel couldn’t imagine how they
could come together, two families as one, with this lack of respect for his wishes.
Better he take the family and go. “Tomorrow will be another long day.”

“I’m sorry.” Helen’s voice caught in her throat. Her face reddened. “It’s their rumspringa.
You know that.”

Her crestfallen face hurt his heart. He tried to see his way through it. How could
they ever work this out?

“Gabriel?”

“I know that and I’m sorry too.” He called to Seth who trotted from the barn. “Hitch
up Helen’s buggy for her. It’s time for them to head home.”

Annie took a sip of lemonade from the thermos Isaac offered her, aware that he watched
her every move from his spot on the blanket he’d spread under an enormous oak tree.
The branches provided ample shade. If only there were a cooling breeze to go with
it. “It’s good. Very good.”