Loving Liam (Cloverleaf #1) (28 page)

Maggie entered the RV with a few more used bowls, stirring Rachel from her fantasy.

“Are they being good for you?” she asked, nodding in the direction of the children as she set the dirty dishes in the sink.

“They haven’t even moved,” Rachel joked. “Apparently, that movie is riveting.”

Maggie laughed and braced herself against the counter near Rachel. “So are you enjoying yourself?” she inquired, her gaze still on the children.

“I don’t know if I have ever had such a nice time,” Rachel said as she rinsed soap from the bowls. “It’s so relaxing out here. I’ve never been camping and had no idea what I was missing out on.”

“Yeah, I always like coming out here with the family. Now that we have Mel, I wish we were here more.”

“She’s such a sweet little girl, Maggie. She seems to be having a blast.”

“I know. That’s what makes being over on the coast so hard.” Maggie’s eyes turned sad as she looked at Rachel.

Instantly, Rachel wondered what was going on with her new friend, but she didn’t know if it was her place to ask.

“I want her to grow up with her cousins and with my parents and brothers,” Maggie said as she looked at the children again.

“You guys all seem very close, despite the fact you don’t live here. I can’t get over how neat your family is,” Rachel said. “My family is nothing like yours. In fact, I got into this argument with my mother last night. Keep in mind, Maggie, her and I, like, never speak. She only sends me a text message here and there, okay?” Rachel swallowed before she began to relive the conversation with Evelyn. “So I get this call from her, and she isn’t calling to check in on her daughter who moved fifteen hundred miles away, so I assume something must be wrong.”

Maggie looked concerned. “How sad. So you two aren’t very close, then, I take it?”

“Nope. She has always been kind of hands-off with me and my brother. My father isn’t much better, to be honest,” Rachel explained. “Anyway, she calls, and I finally get her to tell me the reason behind her call. She had lunch with my best friend’s mom, and I guess she mentioned to my mother that I was dating someone up here.”

Maggie’s eyes grew wide. “Liam?”

“See, I had told my friend about him, and obviously, as you know, we have some sort of thing we are trying to really figure out, but that’s a whole other ball of wax,” Rachel rambled, drying her hands on a dish towel. “So I used to be in a relationship my mother thought was absolutely perfect, only it was far from it. Well, she accuses me of ruining that relationship, and well, she just got so nasty,” Rachel said, feeling the hurt from last night return.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Rachel.” Maggie rubbed Rachel’s arm soothingly. “Why doesn’t your mom support your reason for not being with that guy?”

“I could give you a hundred reasons why that woman never supports me, but you see, he’s a doctor, like my dad, and also a pretty big scumbag, as it turned out. She just wants me to marry and have kids and play in the same ridiculous social circle she’s in,” Rachel confessed.

Maggie frowned. “Yeah, I can’t say my mom is like that. I mean, she always tries to see the good in everyone, but I know she has my back no matter what,” she said as she led Rachel to the couch. “See, I get so lonely in Seattle. Michael is constantly working. He says it’s for our future, but it’s frustrating.”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed his phone is kind of glued to him,” Rachel said carefully.

“I know. I wish he would be more present and realize that him being here with us is far more important than work. I want the memories we’re making here to be good ones,” Maggie explained. “So Michael has been talking about wanting more children, which would be great, I guess, but I feel like a single mom half the time as it is. I can’t see the sense in bringing another baby into the mix right now.”

“Have you guys thought about moving back here? Maybe a slower pace would be good for Michael,” Rachel said, smoothing a wrinkle on her jeans.

“We have tossed the idea around, but he’s so damned focused on making partner at the firm he’s at,” she whispered, glancing over at the children. She clearly didn’t want them to hear her frustration.

“You know, it’s funny, because here I am, from a pretty large city myself, and I came to this teeny tiny town not knowing what to expect. I was worried I couldn’t adapt. But let me tell you, it has slowed me down in ways that were so unexpected, and I find I’m actually pretty happy here.”

Maggie smiled. “I’m glad you moved here, and if we ever do move back, it’s comforting to know I have a great new friend in Birch Valley.”

“Don’t get me wrong. I miss certain things about living in the city, but it is different here. If I ever get married and have kids, I’d want to raise them in a place like this,” Rachel said.

“That’s how I feel, and now that Melanie is getting older, I want her to grow up here. I think what’s hard is that Michael doesn’t quite see this place like I do. He was born and raised in Seattle, so the small-town thing is only something he sees when he visits, you know?”

“You can’t blame him for wanting more kids. Look how beautiful your daughter is.” Rachel looked at the young girl falling asleep next to her cousins.

Maggie sighed. “I know, and Michael is a good dad. He loves her like crazy. But I just feel so stuck.”

“What do you do when Melanie is in school?” Rachel asked, leaning her tired head on her hand as she propped herself up on the couch.

“Well, I used to work, but once I got pregnant, I stayed home. I keep busy for the most part, and I help out at her school a lot.”

“Do you have any friends there?”

“Sort of. I know that sounds silly, but mainly, they’re the wives of Michael’s colleagues or some moms from the school. I left pretty much everyone I knew when I moved over there.” Maggie sighed.

Rachel didn’t know what to add. She had left Chelsea, her only true friend at the time, and that had been difficult. She had then found that making friends in Birch Valley didn’t go quite how she thought it would. She could relate to Maggie’s loneliness somewhat, but now instead of wanting to form friendships, the gears inside her had shifted, and something she’d had no intention of wanting now stood in her sights front and center. She now wanted a relationship, possibly marriage and maybe even children.

“I understand being lonely. I miss my friend Chelsea. She is so unlike anyone I have ever met, and we grew up together, so she knows me pretty damn well,” Rachel said. “She is actually coming up next week to visit. I haven’t seen her since I moved.”

“That’s so neat.”

“Yeah, she’s thinking of staying through spring break. Maybe you can come back over and meet her.”

“That would be nice. I’m pretty sure me and Mel will be back here for spring break.”

The two women talked for a little longer until a soft knock interrupted them.

Liam’s tall figure stood in the doorway. “Hey, ladies,” he said. “Everyone is heading to bed.”

Maggie glanced at her watch. They’d been chatting for a couple hours. Funny how time could disappear when you were locked in a great conversation with a new friend.

“I better tuck these kids in. Is Patrick coming for the twins, or does he want them just to stay in here?” Maggie asked.

“Let me check.” Liam vanished.

“Here, let me help you,” Rachel offered as she turned off the TV and pulled out some blankets for the children.

Michael appeared a moment later. “Getting the kids tucked in? Patrick said to leave the boys in here tonight.”

“Yeah, that works. Sorry, Rachel and I lost track of time,” Maggie explained as she hefted up one of the twins onto the double bed.

Michael lifted the second child. “No, it’s fine. Everyone just sat around and decided to turn in. Your mom said we need to get up early to try and see those moose,” he whispered.

Maggie turned to Rachel. “Oh, I hope we see some tomorrow. Have you ever seen one?”

“No, and to be completely honest, I’m a little scared,” Rachel admitted.

“Well, I’m sure my brother won’t leave your side, so you’ll be fine,” Maggie teased.

Rachel smiled at the thought and said good night as she exited the RV.

***

She found Liam waiting for her.

“You want to sit outside for a little bit before we turn in?” he asked as he ushered her to an empty chair.

“Sure.”

The clear sky was dazzling with its studded blanket of stars. The temperature was dropping, causing Rachel to shiver and bundle her jacket tighter around her.

“It’s really something out here. You never see the stars like this in California,” she commented, staring up at the sky.

“Light pollution. Just think, if you didn’t have all those streetlamps and lights everywhere, you could see these stars there.”

“Yeah, but I’ve got to admit, I kind of like all the lights. It can be so dark when I’m driving at night around here,” Rachel said. “This makes it more special, having to find a secluded spot like this to see the stars,” she added in a quieter voice.

Liam’s mouth contorted into the sexy grin she’d come to love. “Yeah, I suppose so.”

Rachel began to feel a little nervous. They were alone, the lights were turned off inside the RVs, and only the moon and campfire cast shadows around them.

“Rachel, can we talk?” Liam said cautiously.

“About what?” She was suddenly alert.

“About what’s happening between us.”

Rachel wasn’t entirely sure she was ready to discuss this topic. The guilt and shame of sleeping with him had since washed away, but she hadn’t quite managed to fully own the feelings that had replaced them yet.

“Rachel, when I’m with you—”

“I know,” Rachel said. “I get it. I’m just having some difficulty figuring out how I can make this work with my position and yours.”

“What is there to figure out?” he asked, turning his eyes to her.

“Like what if this doesn’t work out? What about our jobs?”

“I think it will work out. I have never felt anything like this before. Have you?” Liam asked as he took her hand.

“No. That’s what scares me so much. I’ve been so mad at myself.”

“For what?” Liam begged as he rubbed his thumb against the top of her hand soothingly.

“For so many things. For starters, running away the morning after we were together. That was awful and unfair to you. I didn’t consider how that would make you feel, and I’m so sorry, Liam.” Rachel’s voice was almost a whisper, and she could feel herself beginning to dissolve. Pieces of the hardened wall she had worked so hard to build around her heart were crumbling. Tears started to trickle down her chilled cheeks.

“Oh Rachel, it’s okay, baby.” Liam smoothed them softly from her face.

“Being here with you and your family feels so nice and perfect. I’m not used to anything like this. I wasn’t looking for this when I came up here,” Rachel said, allowing herself to feel the range of emotions as they flooded her.

She had left her whole life behind when she moved here because she felt something was missing. She just didn’t expect to find it so soon.

“We need to get up early if we want any chance of seeing a moose.” Liam led her to the RV, where he guided her to her bedroom in the rear and planted another feathery kiss on her forehead. His arms sought her and brought her closer to him. Rachel’s face found refuge on his broad chest, where she breathed in the scent of his aftershave mixed with wood smoke from the campfire. She fought hard against the urge to grab him and pull him into her bed. She could tell Liam was restraining himself too as he released his hold on her and said good night, leaving her alone in the tiny bedroom.

***

Liam

Closing the pocket door and leaving Rachel in the RV was one of the hardest things he’d ever done.

The sitting room in the RV was softly illuminated by moonlight as Liam stared at the ceiling above the couch. He hadn’t realized how fragile Rachel was. He didn’t like seeing her cry and instantly wanted to protect her and shield her from any pain, emotional or physical. He wanted her in so many more ways too. He loved how she fit right in with his family, like a perfect piece to their puzzle. Her ability to engage so effortlessly with his mother and sister amazed him, and she was sweet to his father and grandfather, particularly tonight when she’d brought them the hot dogs to cook. She also got along well with his brothers, joking and laughing with them as if they were old friends. He had a fleeting sensation that this was what their lives could be like if he and Rachel were married. Marriage wasn’t usually something he enjoyed thinking about, not because he didn’t want to get married eventually but because he had never met someone he might want to marry. Until now.

Dizzying visions of what was happening between him and Rachel circled his brain until sleep finally invaded him.

***

Rachel

It was still dark out when the O’Brien family gathered the next morning to search for moose. The air was brisk, and a dense fog hovered over the lake and clung to the trees, giving the land an eerie look.