Authors: Anne Rivers Siddons
Tags: #General, #Fiction, #Married Women, #Real Estate Developers, #South Carolina, #Low Country (S.C.), #ISBN-13: 9780061093326, #Large Print Books, #Large Type Books, #Islands, #HarperTorch, #Domestic Fiction
feel so much that I am wasting time.
I will wonder the rest of my life what would have
happened if I had not been at home in bed for the next
three days. Or what would not have.
On the morning of the fourth day I awoke and the
room did not spin and my eyes did not feel poached
and my face was not swollen to the size of a canta-
loupe, and I was ravenous. I showered and washed
my hair and pulled on jeans and a T-shirt—for outside
it was still warm and sweet with sun—and went
downstairs. Estelle, smiling, made me sausage and
cheese grits, and gave me a
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list of the calls that had come in while I was out of
pocket. None were from Clay. One was from Shawna:
Clay and Hayes were going on west with the South-
Ward people, to see a gold rush theme park in northern
California. Perhaps they would be in by Thursday. He
would let Shawna know where he could be reached.
They were on the move almost constantly; I probably
couldn’t reach him.
“I have my finger on him for you though, Caro,”
Shawna chirped. I made a rude noise at the answering
machine and finished my coffee and thought about the
soft golden week spinning out ahead of me. The light
on the marshes would be wonderful: ineffable and ra-
diant. I jumped up and rooted out my paints and
camera and threw some clothes into my duffel and
fairly flew to the island.
I was set up on the end of the dock, drowning in the
gilt glitter off the water and the marshes, breathing in
the clean old salt breath of the island, feeling the sun
pouring like pale new clover honey over my arms and
face, when I heard the shouts from the house. I knew
without turning around that it was Luis Cassells, and
that something was badly wrong.
By the time I had pounded halfway down the dock,
he came around the corner of the house, stumbling
and running, and in his arms he carried Lita. Her face
was buried in his neck and she
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did not move. My heart swooped into my stomach and
back up, and I stumbled and nearly fell. “Dear Lord,
goddamn it, you take care of this little girl,” I whispered
as I ran.
I met him at the steps up to the dock. He thrust her
into my arms and I took her automatically and held
her close. She scrubbed her face into my shoulder. I
watched him as he stood there, head hanging, chest
heaving for breath enough to speak. While I stood I
was going over the sick-child checklist in my mind, as
I had done a thousand times; I did it automatically.
Breathing shallow but clear, skin cool, grip strong. She
was obviously conscious and I had seen no blood. Her
arms were so tight around me that I could hardly get
my own breath. I waited.
He lifted his head and looked at me, and his face
was white under the tan and mottled red over his
cheeks. His eyes were opaque black and blazing with
something: fear and anguish, I thought, and fury.
“Take her to Auntie, over in Dayclear,” he rasped.
“Tell her to keep her warm. Then get Janie to ring the
bell; Ezra and Esau are fishing down at the bridge.
When they come, tell Ezra to bring a truck and meet
me here, and to bring whoever else is around who can
lift. And then go back and stay with Lita…”
“What is it, Luis?”
“It’s the horses,” he said sickly. “The mare
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and the colt. We found them about a half-mile down
the creek. We were bringing apples for them. They’ve
been poisoned, and I think it was the apples; there are
half-digested apples all over the place. Tell Ezra that,
too. I’m going to wait here for them. I’ll need some-
thing to carry some of the apples in, and a tarp or
something to cover the pile under the house. Don’t go
near those apples, and don’t let anybody from Dayclear
but Ezra and the men come back here. Especially no
children.”
“I’ll call a vet, and the rangers,” I said. Lord God,
please. Not Nissy and the baby. I was afraid to ask.
“
Not the rangers
! I mean that, Caro. Just get Ezra
and tell him what I said. We’ll take the colt to the vet
in the truck, it’s faster.”
“Nissy…” I whispered in dread.
“We can’t help her, Caro. But the colt is still alive,
I think. It would be good if somebody could walk the
creek and see if any of the other horses are…sick.
There’s no way to know how many of the apples were
eaten.…”
“Who could do such a thing?” I said through stiff
white lips; I had felt them blanch.
“Who, indeed?” he spat. “But I’ll tell you who thinks
she did. Lita does. She thinks she did it with her apples.
She hasn’t said one word since. I’m so afraid for her.
My God…go on now. Get her out of here. Auntie has
some kind
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of tea that she uses for sleep; tell her to give Lita some
of that.…”
“Luis…”
“GO, CARO!”
I helped him ease the limp child into the Cherokee
and ran up for my keys and ran back down. Clashing
the Jeep into gear, I said to him, “Did she see?”
“She found them,” he said, and closed his eyes. Then
he gave the car fender a smack and said, “
Vamanos
,”
and turned and went under my house to find the tarp
that stayed there, over the whaler. I screeched out of
the yard and headed as fast as I dared for Dayclear
and Ezra’s Auntie Tuesday. Lita lay with her head in
my lap, eyes closed, perfectly still. Her face was as
white and empty as that of a dead child. There were
no tear tracks on her bleached cheeks.
When I reached the store I held the horn down with
the flat of my hand. Janie came out, muttering darkly,
saw me and the child in my lap, and put both hands
to her mouth.
“Ring the bell,” I called, and she turned and ran. In
a second I heard it speak with its great dark voice, like
eternity. The sound seemed to roll on forever.
“Send Ezra and Esau down to Auntie’s,” I said. “Luis
needs them over at my place. Oh, God, I never
thought…Is Auntie at home, do you know?”
364 / Anne Rivers Siddons
“She to home,” Janie said. “I seen her this morning,
and she say comp’ny comin’ and she got to brew some
tea. I give her some lemons an’ sugar for it.…What
the matter with the baby, Caro?”
“Somebody poisoned the horses,” I quavered. I was
finding it hard to speak past the dread that lay cold
and knotted in my throat. Under it was a red anger of
a magnitude I had never known. But I knew that I
could not let it out yet.
“This baby didn’t get none of it, did she?” Janie
cried.
“No. But she found the horses. The mother is dead.
Luis needs Ezra and Esau to bring a truck; he wants
to take the colt to the vet in it. And he needs some
people to walk the creek and see if any other horses
got into the apples.”
“I tell ’em when they come. An’ I go walk that creek
myself,” she said. “You get that baby on down to
Auntie. I reckon she know what to do; she knowed
you was coming, didn’t she? Go on now…”
“Thank you, Janie,” I said, and screeched off down
the lane. Far off down the hidden creek I thought I
heard the faint, stuttering drone of a faulty outboard
engine.
Auntie Tuesday stood in her doorway. She looked
from me to the child with her milky old eyes and shook
her head.
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“MMMMM, MMMMM,” she said sadly. “Badness
walkin’ right up here in the world today, sho is. Bring
that baby on in here. I ’spec we can find somethin’
make her feel better.”
I lifted Lita and brought her up the steps. She still
did not remove her face from my shoulder, and she
still did not speak. Occasionally she shuddered, a deep,
racking tremor that ran all through her, but that was
all. I started to put her down on the little cot in the
corner, where Auntie slept, but she shook her head at
me.
“Set down in that rockin’ chair and rock her,” she
said. “I done built up the fire. You jus’ get settled
comfortable and rock her now. Keep on a’rockin’ her.
I got somethin’ on the stove do her some good.…”
“She’s not sick or hurt,” I said over Lita’s head. “She
saw something terrible and she thinks it’s her fault.
She’s stopped talking again. But it’s not physical.…”
“I knowed it wasn’t her body,” Auntie said. “Look
like it worse when it git the soul. Well, we do what we
can. We do what we can. The Lord give us things from
the earth help the soul as well as the body, and He tell
those of us what’ll listen how to use ’em. It the tackies,
ain’t it?”
“How did you know?” I could only whisper it.
“Seen ’em last night. Seen ’em in the fire. Knew
somethin’ dark was after them. If it’s a
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happy thing coming I sees it in water. Here, see will
she take this.”
She brought a chipped cup of something steaming
hot from the old stove in the corner of the dark little
room. I took it, not questioning for an instant the
wisdom of giving a child the arcane brew of whatever
this strange old woman found in the woods. I held the
cup to Lita’s lips.
“Take a sip for me, baby,” I said.
But she turned her head away.
“Give her to me,” Auntie said. “I been gittin’ that tea
down chirrun’s craws for lots of years now.”
She indicated that I should get up and let her sit
down in the rocker and put the child in her lap.
“Auntie, she’s too heavy for you,” I said. “I’m afraid
she’ll break one of your little old bones.”
“Ain’t no child gon’ hurt me,” she said, and I got up
with Lita, and she settled herself stiffly into the rocker
and held out her arms, and I put the child into them.
Lita’s face found the thin old shoulder and burrowed
there. Her legs dangled almost to the floor, but Auntie
held her firmly. She put her face down to the top of
Lita’s head and whispered something into her hair,
and began to rock. Presently I heard her begin to sing
softly, in a thin reedy old monotone:
“Fix me, Jesus, fix me right,
Fix me so I can stand.
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Fix my feet on a solid rock
Fix me so I can stand.
My tongue tired and I can’t speak plain,
Fix me so I can stand,
Fix my feet on a solid rock,
Fix me so I can stand…”
She sang it over and over, more a faraway, atonal
chant than a song, and presently the dim little room
seemed to shimmer with it, and the flickering light
from the lit stove rose up to meet it, and song and fire
and woman and child seemed to sway in the room
until my eyes grew heavy and I nodded. Whenever I
forced them open I saw that she still sat, cradling the
child, rocking, rocking. The last time I looked I saw
Lita lift her head from Auntie’s shoulder and sigh
deeply, and relax against her into sleep.
“Thank you,” I whispered, sliding into sleep myself,
but I could not have said who it was I thanked.
When I woke it was after noon; I could tell from the
square of pale sunlight that was creeping across the
cabin’s linoleum floor, from the open doorway. The
sweet smell of high sun on pine and salt from the estu-
ary blew into the room. Another smell, rich and green
and savory, came from a big black iron kettle on the
stove. Janie Biggins was stirring it and smiling over at
368 / Anne Rivers Siddons
me. Her gold tooth flashed in the sunlight from the
doorway.
“That smells good,” I said. “What are you doing
here, Janie?”
And then I remembered, and whipped my head
around toward the rocker. It was empty. I made an
inadvertent sound of fear.
“She all right,” Janie said. “She gon’ be fine. She
sleepin’ hard. Auntie and I put her to bed in the spare
room. She sleep a long time, I ’spec. Need to. Auntie
say when she wake up maybe she talk some.”
“Oh, God, I hope so. She…There was a long time
when she didn’t talk at all, before she came here. Luis
didn’t know if she ever would again. I was so afraid
that she’d lost it again.…”
“Auntie sing her a healin’ song. It a good one. I’ve
seed it bring the tongue back to folks what had been
struck and ain’t talk for months. ’Sides, Auntie seen
her talkin’ in the well water. She gon’ be all right. Her
mama gon’ take care of her.”
“Her mama’s dead, Janie. She’s only got her grand-
father.…”
“Auntie seed her mama in the water, too,” she said,
and I could tell that for her, that ended the matter. I
did not pursue it.
I got up and straightened my rumpled clothes and
went into the tiny, shedlike room off the cabin’s main
one. A big, beautiful old rice bed stood against the far
wall, the room’s only furni
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