Lucifer (Book 3, The Redemption Series) (3 page)

“You’ll grow to be more of a monster than I am,” he tells me. “Hate will fill your soul to a point where you can't be saved. If you want to stay the person you are, stop trying to retrieve them, Anna. Save yourself and those who love you the pain of losing you in that way.”

Lucifer phases
back to Hell, leaving me with even more questions than I had before.

Chapter 2

I stare at Lucifer's phase trail and know exactly why he’s returned to Hell. I pity his lonely existence. He only wants to relive beloved memories of his time with my mother, allowing Hell to feed off his unending misery. Having found my own soulmate, I can only imagine the torment Lucifer is living in. If I were faced with an eternity without Malcolm, I’m certain I would either go mad or simply die from a broken heart. Unfortunately, the rift separating Heaven from Hell is a chasm no one can traverse.

I stand up from the bench and take in a deep breath to help
brace myself for what awaits me inside the house. I want to be with Malcolm, but I know he'll be furious with me for leaving without letting him know where I went. Then again, I can't imagine he would have simply stood aside and let me follow Lucifer to Hell. He would have done everything within his power to keep me from phasing there, even though it did end up providing me with some valuable information. I now know a small portion of what Lucifer was holding back from us. I have a feeling there is more to the story than what he told me, but at least he knows there's nowhere he can go that I won't follow to get the truth.

When I phase back to Malcolm's bedroom, I find the man I love sitting on the edge of the bed looking completely lost.
His elbows are resting on his thighs with his head hanging low and propped up between the palms of his hands. I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt as I look at him. I don’t like to see him so sad, and I like it even less because I know I’m the reason for it.

As soon as I take a step forward, Malcolm's head jerks up. I'm in his arms before I can even think about taking a second step.

“Anna,” he sighs with a mixture of relief and worry, hugging me tightly to him, “where have you been? Did someone take you? Are you hurt?”

Malcolm makes to lean back to look at me, presumably to make sure that I haven't been harmed in any
way. I quickly wrap my arms around his waist and hold him firmly to me, needing to feel his strength.

“
I'm fine,” I tell him, feeling anything but after what Lucifer has told me. “Just hold me, Malcolm. All I need right now is to feel you.”

Malcolm does as I ask, but I know his questions are
far from over.

“
Where were you?” He demands, but not harshly. “We searched everywhere we could think of but couldn't find you.”

I'm silent for a long time because I know the moment I answer his question he'll be mad. I would much rather deal with a worried Malcolm than a
n angry Malcolm.

After a while I hear,
“Anna...tell me where you’ve been.”

I close my eyes and breathe in Malcolm's scent, drinking in his warmth
for a few more precious seconds before giving him my answer.

“
I followed Lucifer to Hell.”

Malcolm jerks back from me and grabs
hold of the top of my arms. He looks into my eyes like he hopes to find that I'm joking. His eyes narrow on me in anger when he sees that I'm not.

“
Have you lost your mind?” He demands angrily.

“
We needed answers,” I tell him, trying to sound reasonable.

“
You
needed answers,” Malcolm corrects. “
I
wouldn't ask you to go there for anything in this world. You can't just traipse down to Hell and come back thinking that place won't change you in some way. Once it grabs a hold of your mind, it won't let go, Anna. You don't play with something that dangerous. Look what it’s done to Lucifer!”

“
I'm not going to argue and say it was the smartest thing I've ever done,” I admit, knowing I don't have a leg to stand on in this argument. “But I needed Lucifer to tell me what he knows about our future.”

“
What he
thinks
he knows,” Malcolm corrects. “Our future is what we make of it. Nothing Lucifer says will change that fact.”

“
It might,” I say, seeing my words register on Malcolm's face. “He told me what collecting the seals might do to me.”

Malcolm lets go of my arms, obviously not expecting my
fact-finding mission to bear fruit.

“
What did he say?”

“
He said they could transform me into a monster worse than him. That they would fill my soul with so much hate I wouldn’t be able to recognize myself anymore.”

Malcolm's brow lowers
at hearing this news, but he doesn't say anything.

“
What are you thinking?” I ask, knowing he's considering my words thoughtfully.

“
Do you remember me telling you the warning God gave us?” He asks. “The one about us needing to make sure your heart remained pure?”

“
Yes,” I say.

“
Maybe this is why we were told that,” Malcolm reasons. “If the seals can darken your heart, then maybe there's a way to protect your soul from them.”

“
But how am I supposed to keep my heart pure?”

“
By not allowing hatred to fill it,” Malcolm says, pulling me back into his arms. “We won't let that happen to you. My father wouldn't have sent you down here just to become something worse than Lucifer. He doesn't play games with a person's soul like that. Letting people have a choice in who they become has always been important to Him. You're stronger than anyone I know, Anna. I think you were built to withstand whatever evil resides in the power of the seals.”

“
But, what if they're stronger than me?” I ask, letting Malcolm share my worry because I need his strength now more than ever. “What if the power they carry ends up consuming my soul?”

“
I won't let that happen,” Malcolm says fiercely. “And I believe in our son.”

I look up at Malcolm.
“What do you mean?”

“
Lucas has seen our future together,” Malcolm reminds me. “And I choose to believe we'll live the future he’s seen for us. You need to do the same, my love. Believe that we'll have a little boy named Liam and a little girl named Lillianna. Though, I've been thinking about that name...”

“
Don't you like it?” I ask, smiling at the dubious look on Malcolm's face.

“
Seriously, that name is a mouthful,” Malcolm almost complains. “Let's shorten it to Liana. If she ever does something bad, by the time I get her full name out of my mouth I will have forgotten what it was I was going to chastise her for.”

I
giggle, the tension from our conversation broken slightly.

“
I'm fine with Liana,” I tell him, my heart swelling with love for the man and future father of my children standing in front of me.

Malcolm lets me go and takes one of my hands into his.

“Come on, everyone is worried about you. Next time at least leave me a note before you just disappear. Though, I’m not sure how happy I would be if you wrote, ‘Gone to Hell. Be back soon’.”

“
I'm sorry I put you through that,” I tell him. “I just couldn’t let him disappear again without getting some answers. It might even explain why Will had a hard time resurrecting me. Is he still here?”

“
No. He isn't allowed to stay on Earth for very long after he revives you.”

“
I wish he could stay here with us permanently,” I say. “I think I could use all the friends I can get right about now.”

Malcolm squeezes my hand reassuringly.

“I won't let anything happen to you,” he tells me with so much conviction I have no choice but to believe him. “Now, let's go find the others and let them know you're back.”

Malcolm phases us to the sitting room where everyone seems to be waiting on news of my whereabouts.

“Mommy!” Lucas yells, removing Luna from his lap onto the floor and scrambling off his seat on the couch beside Millie. He runs to me and wraps his little arms around my hips, hugging me so tightly I'm not sure he ever intends to let me go.

Vala leaps from her own spot on the couch and comes to sit behind Lucas, an
ever-faithful protector of us both.

“
Where were you, Anna?” Vala asks, worry over my sudden disappearance evident in her voice.

I look around at Millie and my Watcher protectors as they all come to stand in front of us, anxious to hear my answer.

“Lucifer came to see me, and I followed him to get some answers,” I tell them, not wanting to flat out say that I travelled to Hell in front of Lucas. He was upset enough. I didn't want to aggravate the situation.

“
Have you lost your mind, lass?” Desmond asks me in utter disbelief.

“
My thoughts exactly,” Brutus grumbles, crossing his arms over his chest and shaking his head in disappointment.

“
Did you completely forget what I told you about that place?” Jered says, not bothering to hide his aggravation with me.

I look at Daniel and wait for him to chastise me too.

“I don't think I have anything else to add,” he tells me with a shrug. “They pretty much said it all.”

“
I went because I needed answers,” I tell them. “And I got a partial one from him.”

Gently, I loosen Lucas' hold on me and bend down on one knee to face him.

“Lucas, would you mind going with Millie to the kitchen and getting me something to drink. I'm really thirsty.”

“
Ok,” Lucas says, unaware that I'm sending him on an errand so he doesn't hear what I need to tell the others.

“
Come along, Lucas,” Millie says, holding out her hand to him. “I know just the thing we can fix for your mother to make her feel right as rain.”

Lucas and Millie walk out of the room with
Vala pushing Luna along to follow close behind them. Once I know they are out of hearing range, I go on to tell the others what I told Malcolm about Lucifer's warning.

“
Do you trust what he told you?” Jered asks, knowing I would be able to tell if what Lucifer said was the truth or a lie.

“
I…think he was telling me the truth,” I tell them, only then realizing I didn’t feel confident in my answer. Usually, my natural sixth sense would tell me definitively whether or not someone was speaking the truth. Why didn’t I feel it while I was talking to Lucifer?

“
Why don’t you sound sure?” Malcolm asks, looking as worried as I feel.

“
Because I’m not,” I admit, seeing no need to hide the fact from them.

No one says a word, but they all look
unsettled by this revelation.

“
Do you think it’s a side effect from having two of the seals?” I ask them.

“
It’s possible,” Jered says. “We’re entering unknown territory here, Anna. None of us knows all the answers. We’ll just have to deal with the consequences of you obtaining the seals as they happen.”

“
Let’s assume for now that Lucifer was telling the truth,” Brutus says. “Is collecting them really worth the risk it poses to Anna? Because I don't think retrieving them is worth losing her like that.”

“
I understand your concern,” I say, “but Malcolm and I don't think God would send me to do something He doesn't think I can handle. We need to have faith that He knows what He's doing.”

Jered sighs in resignation.
“Anna's right. We need to trust that our father has a plan to keep her safe.”

“
I still don't like it,” Desmond says, running one hand through his shoulder length hair in frustration. “I don't like it one bit.”

“
I don't think any of us like it,” Daniel tells him, “but when have you known our father to do something without thinking it through? He sent Anna to this particular point in time for a reason. I think we just need to trust Him. But,” Daniel looks at me, “if there comes a time when you feel like you're losing yourself, you need to say something. Don't hide anything from us, Anna. You may think it'll cause us worry, but your silence would worry us even more. Promise me you'll ask for our help if and when you need it.”

I nod my head.
“I promise you I won't keep what's happening to me a secret. I'm going to need all of you to help me survive this.”

Malcolm puts an arm around my shoulders.

“We'll get through this together,” he promises me.

There's a moment of silence before Jered clears his throat to break it.

“I think we need to talk about Botis,” Jered says. “And... what else might be happening.”

“
What do you mean?” I ask.

“
We seriously doubt Botis is the only one Lucifer placed in a position of power here on Earth,” Jered tells me. “I think it would be a good idea if we all split up and scouted out the other cloud cities.”

“
It makes sense,” Malcolm agrees. “If Lucifer wants to prevent Anna from killing the princes, placing them in high profile positions would definitely make it more difficult. Plus, it would feed their greed for power and keep them happy for a time.”