Mage of Shadows (15 page)

Carmen led us down to the cafeteria and chose a spot near the back, very close to where I had seen Danae and her friend sitting before. I watched her survey the rest of the cafeteria from her position against the wall unconsciously. It was something she was used to doing at all times apparently.

"So… rushing?" I tested the word she had mentioned before, unsure of its meaning.

She nodded while picking at a salad she had gotten from the food line, "Rushing is the term used for attempting to join a Frat or Sorority. Fall semester is the typical term that people 'rush,' but it can really be done at any time with the leaders' say so. APA usually has about twenty-five people attempt to cross. Way less than that get accepted, of course. Anyone that is picked up is paired with an older member- almost always one beginning their junior year. They stick with you for two years until they graduate and then the cycle repeats."

"You're a sophomore," I pointed out the obvious, "So who is your peer mentor?"

Carmen gave me a grim smile, "Danae Lincoln. It… isn't fun. If I had to compare it to anything it's a master/servant relationship. She shows me the ropes and in turn I do whatever she wants." The girl made a sound as if she was attempting to laugh, but couldn't quite manage it, "A quick hazing would be easier- too easy. If you join, you have to deal with a two year long hazing."

Two years. I couldn't say that I expected it to be that harsh. Still, Carmen mentioned training… if she had been a novice like me a year ago; she had definitely improved quite a bit since then. That meant it was possible for me as well.

"You shouldn't join." Carmen's abrupt statement cut into my thoughts like a sharp knife, I met her eyes to see them boring into me, as if trying to convey some hidden meaning she didn't want to say aloud.

"Why not?"

"I've told you why." Carmen replied, keeping her voice low even though there was no one seated near us, "You have a chance to avoid all of it, Nick. You'll avoid the mistakes that I made, that Em- we made. I know a Normal life seems boring, I know. But it can be beautiful in its own way. Honestly? You'll probably live a lot longer too. Raj and David are your roommates? Then you know how great you can have it. Follow them, learn from them instead. Be Normal instead of… of being one of us."

I didn't say anything, didn't protest. I thought about it, really thought about it for several long quiet minutes. I listened to the happy buzz of the other students around us, broken only by a playful shout that rang louder than others, or laughter as someone said something particularly funny. I had my back to them, different from them, yet I considered myself the same in a lot of ways.

If I got up and turned away from Carmen, if I walked away from her, she would never mention me to Archanos. I would be safe to go and tell Jimmy and Nishi that these people were just too dangerous. They could cross if they wanted, join up with them. I could focus on school with Eliza; have fun with Raj, David and their friends. Become Normal like my parents always wanted; and get the job they always insisted I was smart enough to attain.

I would have magic, and the ability to use it… but I would be Normal in every other way. Normal friends, Normal life. Staring across from Carmen's intent, pleading gaze, it had never seemed like such a good idea. I would be safe in anonymity. What did I know about the magical world, other than it was hidden, far removed from Normal life, and a dangerous place to live in?

The night when I had burned Two-Bit returned in that moment. But it wasn't his screams I remembered, but my encounter with the first mage I had met at the university that occurred after. I remembered his dangerous grin, his easy use of power I couldn't yet comprehend… calling me by name, telling me to be careful. I hadn't gone out since, and hadn't heard from him either.

If I kept under the radar, they would leave me alone, because I wasn't powerful enough to be a threat. What could I do against these people, anyways? Carmen could take me apart by herself and she wasn't even a full member. Danae and her muscular friend, or that person at the memorial service whose will was so imposing that he could take away my ability to even perceive magic? Every mage I met always seemed to be an instant away from sending me to the morgue.

But then again not Nishi or Jimmy though. Not Max… or Emily, who died because she wanted to change things… and hadn't Carmen said that Emily wasn't alone in her thinking? There were obviously mages that were dangerous, bad. But just like everywhere else there were people trying to do the right thing even if it wasn't easy.

I could turn away… if I didn't believe there was a chance to do good here. But there was though.

Carmen saw it in my eyes even just as I came to the realization myself. She bowed her head and pushed away what remained of the food in front of her, "Alright, then. I tried, I really did." She seemed apologetic, and I didn't really comprehend why until what happened next.

A heavy hand clapped down on my shoulder causing me to look up in surprise. I saw the easy grin of the Indian mage I had seen walking out with Danae earlier. Though he looked pleasant enough in that moment, my heart hammered furiously against my ribcage.

"You did try." He said to Carmen, "But he chose. And now it's time for the next step for him."

"The next step?" I managed to squeak, even as his grip tightened and I felt myself being lifted to my feet.

"The next step," He repeated cheerfully, "Come with me, Stratus, we're going to have a talk. My name is Vivek, but you can call me Vik."

As this 'Vik' led me out of the cafeteria, I took one last look behind me at Carmen. The girl hadn't moved from her seat, made no protest about me being dragged away… but her eyes followed me, unhappy and defeated. They were the eyes of someone watching another person marching to their death- soon to be a casualty of war.

More than Vik frog-marching me towards the doors of RT, more than his pan-sized hand clamped down on my shoulder in an iron grip, Carmen's defeated look scared me the most.

I had made my choice and now I would face the consequences whether I liked them or not.

There's a sort of exhilaration that comes with meeting new people- not quite the same exhilaration that comes when going down the steepest hill of a rollercoaster, but similar in a way… sort of like standing by the edge of the cliff, safe and secure in for footing. But just standing there, staring down and being unable to see the bottom, fills you with anxiety.

Will they like me? Why not?

Are they important to others, or to myself? Will they be?

People are deeper than what lies at the bottom of a simple cliff. It takes years to fully know a person, to learn everything about them… and even then you're never quite sure if you've really explored every hidden crevice.

Because unlike cliffs and what sits at the bottom, people can and will lie to you. All the way up until the day they die or you do. It's not wrong per se, its human nature to grease the spinning wheels of social interactions with white lies. But the untruths people will tell to protect hidden shames, are often far more insidious than simple white lies.

Vik loosed his grip on my poor shoulder as soon as we exited RT. He then calmly walked over to a nearby bench and sat down. He promptly pulled out a cigarette and a plastic lighter. He took a long steady drag, a well-practiced smoker. His beady eyes were focused on my own as if he were attempting to discern the contents of my soul. It was disconcerting, but I didn't turn my eyes away from Vik, nor did I attempt to walk away from him.

He had been right, I made my choice. There would be no walking away now.

"I've heard about you." Vik said, smiling at me. He had a dangerous kind of smile, it reflected the predator I could sense within him, hidden just beneath the surface.

"Really?" I said, managing a dry laugh, "I'm famous, people I never met have heard about me. I'll have to phone my folks."

My new companion didn't laugh at my attempt at dry humor, instead he leaned forward, "I've heard you have the ability to set a man ablaze with just a thought."

Two-Bit's dying screams and violent thrashing came to the forefront of my mind immediately, I desperately pushed them away and swallowed, "It's not my proudest ability; I'm not very good with fire yet." I admitted, trying to get distance from both the memory and conversation.

Another drag from his cig, still studying me. It was unnerving- though I tried to seem calm under his scrutiny. Vik's thick eyebrows scrunched together curiously, and he ran a finger down one cheek as he considered me, almost puzzled. Like I had said something he hadn't quite understood.

"You don't know." Vik murmured, more to himself than to me, "You don't understand the significance…"

"What?" I asked, puzzled. What didn't I know? This conversation wasn't going quite the way I thought it would.

Vik ignored my question to field another one of his own, "Do you know how Julius Caesar died?"

What kind of question was that?

Still, I responded to the best of my weak knowledge, "Er, he was murdered by Brutus."

"Not just Brutus," Vik corrected absentmindedly, flicking away ash from the end of his cigarette, "A group of senators led by Brutus killed Caesar together. They stabbed him over and over long after the killing blow was made. Do you know why?" The pause was too short here for me to guess, "Because they were angry and afraid. Caesar had taken Rome and turned into an empire that only he ruled. They had lost all of their power and Caesar was foolish enough to think that they would be okay with that."

He took a long drag of his cig here, and we sat in silence. I wasn't sure what to say, or what the point of the story was.

"According to lore, Caesar was a mage." Vik said as matter-of-fact despite my surprise, "Supposedly what really separated the plebeians from the ruling class in Rome was the fact that magical ability was far more common in the elite. It was a right to rule over the masses, back in the old days. No mage had to hide himself; they were respected as the rightful rulers of the human race. Two mages birth a mage almost always. Hence mages married other mages, no mixing with… lesser classes."

Vik turned to laugh at the dumbfounded look on my face, "Of course, you don't know any of this. With the advent of Christianity, then Islam, really monotheism in general, the world became a very different place… the Vatican especially was renowned for its destruction of Old World records that had anything to do with magic. Still, it lives on with us. Magic is a birthright, and its prevalence is starting to spike again."

The playfulness he had had with Carmen was gone, and it had been replaced with a passion that I didn't understand or expect from someone who looked like he could crush my head using one enormous hand, "How do you know all this?" I managed to say finally.

"You learn a lot in college." Vik said with a mysterious smile, "Granted I'm a bit more interested in true history than others, understanding the past is key to understanding the present, right?"

"Right."

He laughed, "Are you agreeing with me because you think I'm right, or because you're afraid of me?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes, of course it does." Vik said, sounding surprised that I might think otherwise, "Choice is a fundamental right of humanity. We choose our actions, Stratus, and suffer the consequences. Our choices can lead to the development of the greatest civilizations on Earth… and they have always led to their eventual collapse, as well."

At that moment, a couple walked through the gap between us and we didn't speak for several breaths as they passed, chatting obliviously with each other. I watched them go; half-wishing I could follow and leave Vik behind.

The other User was staring after them as well, but for very different reasons, "Look at them." Vik said quietly, "They're free, Stratus. They can say whatever they want, whenever they want, with no consequence. This is the land of the free… if you're Normal. But us, we have to constantly watch ourselves. How is that fair?"

I sensed the question was rhetorical, but answered anyways, "It's not."

Vik looked at me again, beady eyes glittering ominously, "No, freshman. It is fair, because we chose this. We chose to hide in the shadows, integrate into society and get normal jobs while having our little secret meetings…" I could hear the anger and disgust dripping in his voice, "We're afraid of them, but we shouldn't be. They should fear us."

It was something that I had thought about before. Why did mages hide? Because we knew we were different, and people didn't like different. When entire races had been persecuted for simply the color of their skin, the religion they practiced, or the language they spoke… then mages would obviously be nothing but freaks to be destroyed.

"There are too many of them," I said quietly, "That's why we're afraid. One mage is strong, but there are billions of Normals. How many mages could possibly exist?"

He smiled dangerously, "More than you think, my friend. There are over twelve mages at this university alone, at this moment. Do you realize how significant that is? Our population is growing, exponentially from what it was in the past. Covens are bursting at the seams due to all the new members being acquired in the past twenty or so years. You know the real reason why the dam hasn't burst? Why we're still in hiding?"

I shook my head.

Vik clenched a fist, "Because we're too busy going for each other's throats rather than focus on conquering the real enemy. We should be focusing on the Normals."

He saw the look on my face and shook his head quickly, "Don't get me wrong! I don't mean killing them, far from it. But we should be on top, we're better than them. Tell me you don't agree with that."

I couldn't say it, because I knew he had a point.

"This country is already rotten." Vik continued, "Greed has corrupted any morals it once held, and trust me when I say that the only reason the government hasn't become overrun with mages is because coven law prevents us. That will change, soon enough." The older student looked at me again, gaze calculating, "You made your choice to join, but you didn't really know what that would mean. I have to ask if you still will, even though I can't tell you everything. I have to ask for your trust and loyalty for a cause that you don't quite understand yet… but what I can tell you is that joining us is the right choice."