Mail Order Bride: Westward Dance (17 page)

“Madelyn Ann O’Connor, will you make me
the happiest man in the world by becoming my wife?” Seth
asked.

Maddie’s shock showed on her face as
Seth watched her. He waited as she recovered her voice. Maddie
hadn’t seen this coming and wasn’t sure what to say. She loved Seth
and needed him, but marrying him meant that she would have to move
to Montana because she knew that there was no way he would ever
stay in Pittsburgh. She didn’t think she could do it. She wasn’t
like Tessa. She wanted to stay with her family, but she wanted to
be with Seth.

Maddie felt like she was being torn in
two as she looked down at Seth. He was waiting for an answer. She
saw the hope in his eyes and the love and hated herself because she
couldn’t marry him.

“Seth, I love you, more than you’ll
ever know, but I can’t marry you. I’m so sorry. I can’t leave my
family and my home for good and you can’t stay. It’s an impossible
situation,” she said.

Seth rocked back a little on his knee.
This wasn’t the answer he’d been expecting and he felt as if his
heart was being crushed. He’d b01een so sure she’d say yes to his
proposal.

“Maddie, you would still be with family
in Montana. Your sister and everyone else are there,” he said. “And
I would be there to love you and I’d make you so happy.”

Tears stung Maddie’s eyes. “I don’t
think I could get used to your way of life, Seth. You would be gone
a lot and I would have nothing to do. I wouldn’t be able to adapt
like Tessa. I’m sorry, Seth, but my answer is no,” she
said.

Seth hung his head for a moment and
then got up. His movement was slightly awkward and he cursed the
weakness that still existed in his leg. He drew himself up straight
intent on keeping his dignity even in the face of her
refusal.

“Well then I guess that’s it. I don’t
know what else to say, Maddie,” he said.

Maddie could see how much she’d hurt
him and regretted her words, but she had to be true to her
feelings. The only problem was that her emotions were divided and
she was confused.

Seth kissed her cheek and said,
“Goodbye, Maddie. I’ll never forget you or stop loving you. I wish
you well.”

Maddie began to sob quietly as she
watched him stride from the room and she sat down heavily on a
chair as crushing grief filled her.

In his room, Seth quickly shed his
suit. As he took off each layer it was as if he was trying to leave
behind this life he’d led for several months. He didn’t belong here
and he would never fit in. During the days in the O’Connor house,
he’d come to love Maddie’s family and he would miss them terribly.
But it was time to go home, back to the life he loved and his own
family.

He fell deeper into misery as he put on
his old clothes and slipped his feet into his boots. He laid the
suit on his bed. He wouldn’t be taking it with him because it would
just remind him of the night when his heart had been rent in two.
He threw his meager belongings into his leather travel bag and took
one more look around the room before leaving it. Then he went back
inside and sat down on the bed and took out a tablet from the
drawer in the nightstand and began to write. As he worked, Seth
tried to imagine how Marcus would write something like this. When
he was finished, he found an envelope and put the letter into it.
He took the engagement ring he’d bought for Maddie out of the box
and put it inside with the letter. Then Seth sealed it and left the
room for good.

Geoff and Maureen looked up as he came
into the parlor where they sat. Geoff had been reading the paper
and Maureen was working on some needlepoint. Seth came to stand in
front of them. Geoff wondered why he was in his western clothes and
then saw Seth’s bag and knew what was happening.

“I’m leaving. It’s time for me to go
home,” Seth said. “I’ll never really ever be able to repay you for
what you’ve done for me and for opening your home to me. You’re the
best people I’ve ever met and I’m going to miss you all a
lot.”

Maureen’s face registered her
confusion. “I thought everything was going so well with you and
Maddie.”

Seth nodded and his eyes began to
brighten with tears. “Me, too. But I guess it’s just not meant to
be.”

Geoff could see Seth’s pain in the
slump of his shoulders and the grave lines in his face. His heart
went out to Seth and to his daughter who must be hurting just as
much as Seth.

“I’m so sorry to hear that, Seth,” he
said. “You’re sure there’s nothing to be done?”

Seth nodded. “Yeah, I’m sure.” He held
out the envelope to Geoff and said, “Will you give this to her for
me?”

Geoff took the envelope and said, “Of
course.” He ran his hands over it and felt the piece of jewelry in
it.

He rose and hugged Seth. “We would have
been lucky to have you as a son-in-law, Seth.”

Maureen also came to Seth and embraced
him as Geoff moved back. “Geoff’s right. I should have loved seeing
you and Maddie wed. I’m so terribly sorry to see you go. We will
miss you awfully.”

Claire came in and saw her mother
hugging Seth. He’d changed into his old clothes.

“What’s happening?” she
asked.

Maureen released Seth and replied,
“Seth has to go home, Claire.”

Claire was stricken and it showed on
her delicate features. “Why? Please don’t leave.”

The lump in Seth’s throat grew as he
saw her eyes well up. “Aw, Claire don’t do that. This is hard
enough and it’s breaking my heart, but it’s time,
sweetheart.”

Claire threw herself on Seth. She’d
come to love Seth as a big brother and couldn’t stand the thought
of not having him there. “Why do you want to leave us? Aren’t you
happy here?”

“It’s time I get back to my life and my
family. You’re family, too, you know. Maybe you could come visit us
some time,” Seth said. “I’m going to miss you cutting up my food
and talking with you about the cattle business and
such.”

Claire laughed through her tears. “I’m
going to miss that, too.” She called on her inner strength and
broke away from him. “I understand that you couldn’t possibly stay
here for good. This isn’t the life you were meant to lead. You’ll
always be a cowboy.”

Seth gave her a sad smile. “I can’t
believe how smart you are for your age.” He kissed her cheek and
said, “Don’t you ever change.”

To all of them he said, “Well, I best
get going. I’m not going to say goodbye because I hope you’ll come
to see us. I’ll just say see you later.”

He turned and walked out of the room
and out the front door. As he closed the door, Seth felt as if he
was closing it on the most wonderful chapter of his life. He went
down the steps and walked away from the O’Connors and Maddie with a
heart filled with sorrow.

Later that night, Geoff found Maddie in
her room. When she answered his knock and opened her door, Geoff
saw that she’d been crying. Her face was red and puffy and there
were tear tracks on her face. Geoff entered her room and she came
to him, wrapping her arms around his midsection.

Geoff held her, telling her how sorry
he was and that time would heal her heart. She sobbed into his
chest and Geoff could feel her tears soak into his shirt. Finally
she was cried out and stepped back. Geoff guided her to the bed and
sat her down. He sat next to her and put an arm around her
shoulders.

“Seth is a good man with a good heart.
It’s obvious that you love each other. What made you refuse his
proposal?” Geoff asked.

Maddie’s voice was hoarse as she said,
“Papa, I would never fit in with his life. Can you imagine me
living on a ranch and working in the house and in the fields and
whatever? I can’t. I don’t know anything about all that. And he
couldn’t stay here. He would be so stifled in the city. He belongs
out on the plains with the cattle and horses.”

Geoff sighed. “That’s very noble of you
to care about his feelings and want him to be happy, but you don’t
have to be a martyr. You’re a smart, competent young woman who can
do anything you put your mind to. You have to look inside your
heart and decide if letting him go is the right thing to do or if
you have the courage to claim what he’s offering you.”

Maddie gave him a surprised look. “You
would approve of it?”

Geoff nodded. “Yes. He comes from good
stock, as they say. I would have approved of Tessa and Dean
marrying if I’d have known about it before it happened, so why
should it be any different with you and Seth? Think about it. Maybe
this will help you make up your mind.” He handed her the letter
Seth had left for her and left the room.

Maddie felt a lump inside the envelope
and traced her fingers over it. She gasped as she realized that it
was the engagement ring Seth had wanted to give her. She opened the
letter.

Dear Maddie,

I want you to keep this
ring. I bought it for you and you alone. I would never give it to
anyone else. I want to thank you for helping me get through the
toughest thing I’ve ever had to face. You stood by me and kept my
spirits up when I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I came to realize that you were that light and I’ll always be
grateful to you.

You have to know that my
heart belongs to you and always will. You are the most incredible
woman I’ve ever met and I’ll never love anyone the way I do you.
It’s killing me to leave, but there’s no way I could stay now. But
my offer still stands, Maddie. I still want to marry you. I would
spend every day making you happy and giving you the life you
deserve.

I left the ring because I’m
also hoping that maybe someday you’ll come here so I can put it on
your finger. I’m hoping that you’ll remember what we mean to each
other and that you can’t live without me because I’m not sure how
I’m going to live without you.

Well, you know where you
can find me.

Yours,

Seth

As she finished reading Seth’s letter,
determination filled Maddie and she berated herself for being so
weak. Her father was right; she needed to find the courage to take
what she wanted and to be happy. Suddenly she knew what she had to
do. If she was Seth’s light, he was certainly hers. It was time to
face her fears and not let them hold her prisoner any
longer.

The next day, Geoff was reading the
paper at breakfast when he spotted an article that made him sit up
straighter. Maureen noticed his alertness and asked, “What is it,
Geoff?”

Geoff read:

Theodore Wilson, son of Mr.
and Mrs. Christopher Wilson was brutally attacked last evening and
left badly injured in an alley off Everett Street. Though severe,
his injuries are expected to heal. Mr. Wilson couldn’t identify his
attacker except to say that he was tall and very strong. Mr. Wilson
also said that he’d done nothing to incite such violence against
him. Although police are investigating, there is little hope that
they will ever find the culprit.

Geoff finished reading and said, “You
don’t think…”

Maureen nodded and said, “Yes, I do
think and if he were here right now I would thank him and kiss
him.”

“Me, too,” said Claire. “Serves Theo
right.”

“Yes, it does. He got a big dose of his
own medicine. God bless you, Seth,” Geoff said.

Tessa was playing with Mikey out in the
barn. They were having a game of hide and seek. It was easy to find
Mikey because he kept giggling from his hiding place, but Tessa
made as if she couldn’t find him. She pretended to search for a
while, enjoying the sound of his laughter. Finally she “found” his
hiding place and snatched him up.

He laughed loudly and hugged Tessa and
she kissed his chubby little cheek. She was filled with love for
the child that she and Dean had created. Tessa remembered the
terror on Dean’s face when she’d gone into labor. He’d sent Ray to
get Lydia as soon as Tessa’s first contraction came upon
her.

Her labor had been intense but short
lived. It seemed that Mikey had been in a hurry to enter the world
and all had gone well. Dean had cried openly as Lydia had laid the
little bundle in his arms. Tears of joy had streamed down Tessa’s
face as she watched him hold Mikey close and kiss his tiny
forehead. There was something so touching about watching her big,
strong husband hold their small infant so tenderly.

She swung around with Mikey making him
laugh more before kissing him again and putting him
down.

“Would you like a snack?” she asked
him.

Mikey nodded. “Cookie.”

Tessa laughed. “Yes, you may have some
cookies. Come let’s get some.”

She took Mikey’s hand and they walked
out of the barn together. As they strolled towards the house, she
noticed movement in the driveway out of the corner of her eye. When
she turned to see what it was she was shocked to see that Seth was
walking down the drive. She let go of Mikey’s hand and began
walking quickly in his direction.