Man Who Loved Pride and Prejudice (43 page)

   "I should have guessed." He laughed bitterly. "Mental cruelty. I suppose that's one way to put it."

   "I'm
glad
she's left him," said Cassie fiercely, wishing she could somehow protect Calder from this. "I hope it ruins his reputation for good."

   He looked at her, his eyes filled with pain. "Don't go anywhere, please."

   She gazed at him in concern and hugged him. Despite everything his father had done, it must be a shock to Calder to lose what sense of family he had. "I'm not going anywhere. This is where I belong."

   Calder remained subdued the rest of the day. There was no further news of his parents. Between stress and the new puppy, neither of them slept well that night. Cassie decided to stay home the following day, reluctant to leave him alone for long.

   That afternoon the phone rang. Cassie answered it and then held her hand over the receiver for a moment. "It's Dave Crowley. Do you want to talk to him?"

   Calder held out his hand for the phone. "Hi, Dave," he said, sounding dispirited.

   "How are you doing there? I've been worrying about you."

   "We're making do."

   "I have a message for you, from your mother. She asked me to tell you that she's safe and just fine, but she's not going to be in touch with you directly for a while because she doesn't want you caught in the middle."

   "Caught in the middle? I don't think I'm likely to have
that problem. I wish she'd left him a long time ago
.
I'd
have been happier, at least."

   There was a pause. "She hasn't said as much, but I think she left now because he's weak. You've got away from him, and the bad press about his brother leaves everyone ready to believe the worst of him."

   "I suppose."

   "Is there anything you'd like me to tell her?"

   Calder thought for a moment. "Tell her…" He wanted to ask him to give her his love, but found he couldn't quite say the words. "Tell her she's always welcome here," he said finally.

   "I'll do that," Dave said. "Ann wants to talk to Cassie now."

   Calder wished he could say something light before he turned the phone over to Cassie, but his mind seemed frozen, so he just said good-bye.

   "Ann! How are you?" Cassie said cheerfully.

   "Just fine, thanks. How about you?"

   "We're a little stressed, as you might imagine, but otherwise everything's going well," Cassie said.

   "I wanted to ask a favor of you, dear."

   "Of course. Anything."

   Ann coughed delicately. "I've been spending a good deal of time with Caro. She needs to talk about what happened during her marriage, and I've been hearing a lot of it."

"Ah," said Cassie uncertainly.

   "I know Calder has some issues with her, but could you help him understand she needs to be treated very gently right now? She's been through a great deal. Frankly, I try not to think about it too much. Some of her stories are pretty horrific. There was a lot that happened behind closed doors he doesn't know about."

   "I imagine there must have been." It didn't take much imagination to recognize how badly Joe Westing could have hurt the woman who had to share his bed. "I'll do what I can, of course, but I don't think you need to worry. I think his sympathies are in the right place."

   She could hear Ann's sigh of relief. "I'm glad to hear that, dear. I don't think he knows how much he means to her."

   "I expect you're right in that. I'd say he has no idea whatsoever." It was news to Cassie as well.

   "That's what I was afraid of. I'll do what I can from this end, and if you can help him understand, maybe we'll get somewhere."

   "Thanks for telling me, Ann."

   "No need for thanks, dear." She lowered her voice to a confidential level. "I like to consider myself as a non-violent person, but I'm beginning to think I could make an exception for Joseph Westing. I couldn't trust Dave with some of what Caro's told me."

   "I understand," Cassie said slowly. Worried about Calder, she ended the call quickly.

   Calder was kneeling on the floor, scrubbing at a wet spot on the rug. "Sorry. He made a mess. I didn't catch him in time."

   "That's okay. It's going to happen." Cassie found a roll of paper towels and tore some off. "So your mother's with Dave and Ann, I take it?"

   "I'd guessed that already."

   "You had?" Cassie wondered why he hadn't said anything about it before.

   "Yes. This whole thing, the press knowing when the divorce papers were going to be delivered, her disappearance. It all smacked of Dave Crowley. I did some checking on the web. Mental cruelty isn't even grounds for a divorce in Virginia. It has to be physical cruelty. But it's great PR to make sure everyone knows mental cruelty existed." He pressed down on the paper towels to blot up the remaining liquid.

   "Is it Dave you're angry at, or your mother?"

   He sat back on his heels, his eyes remaining on the wet spot. "Neither. I wouldn't wish my father on anyone, even my mother."

   Cassie winced. "Sounds like you're pretty upset with her, too."

   "I feel sorry for her, but the truth is that she wasn't much better than my father. Maybe it was because she was unhappy. I don't know. But she was the one, even more than my father, who tried to make me into something I wasn't. She was the one constantly pushing me into social events, always harassing me about my manners. My behavior was the only thing about me that mattered to her."

   Cassie thought about what Ann had said about Calder's issues with his mother. "You said before that he punished her for fighting with him. Is it possible he punished her if you didn't perform socially the way he expected?"

   "I suppose. Though that's…" He trailed off into silence.

   "Though that's what?"

   "No, I was the one he punished for it," he said grimly. "She was trying to protect
me by making sure I neve
r made those mistakes again."

   "Oh, love." She reached down to put her arms around him. "I'm sorry."

   "There was one time… I'll tell you about it someday, but not now. But she was right to worry."

THE LAB WAS FILLED with the freshness of salt air. Cassie leaned over Calder's shoulder to check the computer screen. So far, so good. Calder was better at entering data into the lab computer than he was at handling scientific glassware. Good thing he didn't have to earn his living as a lab assistant. But this way he could be with her, which was what he said he wanted. Now that the distraction of the move to the Cape was over, he seemed distinctly out of sorts. In truth, he hadn't been himself since the news of his parents' separation.

   Rob stuck his head in the open lab door. "Anybody home?"

   "Rob!" Cassie hadn't known he was in Woods Hole. "Come on in."

   "Thanks. How are you?" Rob looked happy, more his old self than the last time she had seen him.

   "Fine." Cassie was suddenly conscious of Calder's presence behind her. "You remember Chris, of course, and this is Calder. My husband."

   Rob's smile slipped a fraction, but he still shook Calder's hand. "Cassie's told me about you."

   Yes, the temperature in the room was clearly dropping. "Rob is one of Jim's post-docs." This wouldn't be a good time to start telling Calder about Rob's role in her life.

   "Not anymore. I have a new job."

   "Really? Where?" The kind of academic research position Rob wanted was hard to find.

   Rob grinned. "MIT/WHOI. Tenure track."

   "Rob! That's fabulous!" Cassie gave him a quick hug. "I'm going to have to call
you
the golden boy."

   "Thanks." He was visibly proud of his accomplishment.

   Chris looked at least as excited as Rob. "Congratulations. That's great news."

   Cassie recognized her assistant's hungry look. "You'll be hearing from Chris next year. He has his heart set on MIT/WHOI for his PhD."

   "Give me a call when you're ready to apply. I'll be happy to do what I can."

   "Thanks. I will." Chris looked barely able to contain himself.

   Cassie suddenly remembered Calder's presence. He had that look of being hidden behind his eyes again. "MIT/WHOI is a joint graduate school in oceanography. Very prestigious. It's the brass ring."

   "Congratulations, then." Calder definitely had his pretty manners on. Not a good sign.

   Rob rubbed his hands together. "So, Chris, how's that research of yours coming?"

   Chris practically glowed. "Pretty good. I tried your method of collecting data this year and got a great spread. Want to see it?"

   "Love to, but I have to be at WHOI in fifteen minutes. Want to walk with me and tell me about it? If Cassie can spare you, that is."

   Cassie suspected the WHOI appointment was an excuse to get away, but she could understand that. "Sure, go ahead."

   Chris began talking and gesturing to Rob before they were even out in the hallway. Cassie heard their voices fade away. That was the future. Chris would be in the Boston University program with her for a year, and after that he'd be going for his PhD, likely with Rob at MIT/WHOI. It wouldn't be surprising if he chose Rob as his advisor, given their interests. Rob would be there to see Chris do his best work, to mold him into a professional scientist as Jim had molded both of them. Cassie would be left behind with Chris's undergraduate years. Chris's first publication would have Rob's name on it, not hers. She'd given that up when she chose to work with undergrads instead of shooting for a research position like Rob had. She had been the star of the lab in grad school, and now he was surpassing her. What had Jim said about it being hard to give up the prestige of the tenure track?

   But it was what she had wanted. Chris would succeed in grad school because Cassie had done her job well, teaching him to think like a researcher and passing along her love of the field. That was where the real scientists were made, at the beginning, not when they wrote their dissertations. But it also meant saying good-bye to them and sending them off into the world.

   She shook off the moment of melancholy, realizing that Calder had been silent since Rob and Chris left. He appeared to be focused on the computer screen, but Cassie could feel the tension exuding from him. She stood behind him and massaged his shoulders gently. "What's the matter, love?"

   "Nothing." He turned over the data sheet and started to enter the new data.

   "If you don't want to tell me, that's okay, but don't pretend nothing is wrong."

   He leaned his head back against her midriff, his eyes closed. "Who is he?"

   "Rob? An old boyfriend. We were in grad school together."

   "Chris seems to know him pretty well."

   "Rob was around a lot last summer. We tried dating again for a while, but it didn't work out. Obviously." She watched his face carefully.

   "You were seeing somebody last summer, and you never mentioned it to me." He didn't look at her.

   "I didn't feel like talking about it. I treated Rob pretty badly."

   Calder typed in a string of data and then let his hands rest on the keyboard. "What else don't I know about?"

   "Plenty of things, I imagine. Do you really think I'm keeping things from you deliberately?"

   "I don't know what to believe anymore. I thought my mother didn't give a damn about me, as long as I didn't embarrass her. I thought she was happy with my father. I knew my father would always try to control everything I did, but I didn't think he…"

   "You didn't think he would what?"

   He gave a tired sigh. "I didn't think he'd deliberately hurt her." He lapsed into silence again. "He isn't always awful, you know. He was really great sometimes when I was a kid. He'd take me places, show me things—maybe because it was good for people to see he was a family man, but I loved it. I even liked it when he'd take me to work with him. He'd make a big fuss when I brought home a good report card. It didn't get bad until I was old enough to think for myself."

   At least he was finally talking. Cassie was relieved about that. "There aren't any easy answers, are there? For all the terrible things your father did, he was still better than his own father."

   Calder shook his head. "You're too generous. My grandfather had his problems, but he was a saint compared my father."

   "Your grandfather told
his eldest son he'd rather hav
e him dead than be an embarrassment. That's ruthless. I can't imagine what it would be like to grow up knowing that if you mess up, you're going to be locked away forever like your big brother.
Your
father just expected you to keep quiet."

   He was silent for a minute. "I suppose so. I never thought about how that affected him, only how he could have condoned it. It still doesn't excuse what he did to my mother."

   "No, of course not. I just like to put things in context. I always have to know the entire ecosystem, not just an isolated bit." She dug her fingers into the tight muscles of his shoulders, kneading until the knots began to loosen.

   He dropped his chin to his chest. "I'm sorry. It seems like all I give you is trouble."

   "Calder." Her hands stopped. "Don't you know what my life was like before you came along? I enjoyed my friends, and I'd do fun things from time to time, but I lived for my work and I didn't let anyone close enough to see my feelings. I was running away from myself, and you made me stop and look at what I was doing and ask myself if that was all I wanted in life. You gave me a
reason
to want to have more. Don't you know that?"