Marked by Death (The Godhunter, Book 4) (29 page)

“
I don’t want to hurt him, baby,” I pleaded with him with my eyes. Don’t let me lose my son over this. “I don’t want to hurt you either but this is the way things are.”

“
You need to tell him, Mom,” his face relaxed into acceptance. “He’ll be more hurt if he finds out about it from someone else.”

“
Fine, I’ll tell him.”

“
Today,” Vidar looked so stern and I saw his father in the hard lines. It made my heart hurt.

“
Alright, baby,” I held my arms out and he went into them.

“
We love you so much, Mother,” he whispered into my hair. “I know they do too but don’t let their love blind you to ours.”

“
Never,” I hugged him tighter. “Nothing could blind me to you.”

A knock at the front door startled me and made me step back. Vidar frowned, pushing me behind him as he leaned towards the door and listened. After a few moments, he moved forward and opened it, only then did I notice Trevor and Kirill beside me.

“Mother,” Vidar turned back and gave me a confused look, “I think you have
another
admirer.”

I started to walk forward but Kirill stuck a hand out. “No, Tima, I check first.”

He moved around Vidar and went out the door. Some rustling sounds came through and then some clinks until Kirill emerged with an armload of bottles and flowers. He made a movement with his head, indicating that Vidar should help him with whatever else was left. Then he took his burden to the kitchen table, the bottles clinking on the glass surface that protected the carvings of my Chinese dining table.

I went over to inspect it all. Four bottles of what appeared to be a dark red wine and a bouquet of white roses, something about them tugged at a memory. Then Vidar put a stone jewelry chest down beside the rest and it all hit home.

“Oh fuck,” I backed away from it all.

“
What?” Trevor had me behind him, like the gifts presented a threat.

“
They’re from Anubis,” I couldn’t take my eyes off them.

“
Anubis?” Vidar eyed the gifts like they were coiled snakes.

I stepped forward and opened the chest. All the jewelry Anubis had given me was inside, along with a piece of parchment. I picked it up as the men watched and then I read.

Footsteps in the corridor but none are hers.

Laughter on the breeze but it’s not mine.

No sound delights me when she’s gone.

No touch, no taste, no smell.

For how can joy be found without her?

And how can I find her again?

I threw the paper back into the chest, where Trevor snatched it back up. He growled and was about to tear it up when Kirill took it from him and read it with a raised brow, before handing it to Vidar. Great, everyone felt entitled.

I picked up the bottles, instantly realizing what they were: Duat wine. Oh yum, I couldn’t waste that could I? Wasting such good alcohol had to be a sin. I went to the kitchen and found a corkscrew while the guys argued over whether to tear up the note and chuck the stuff or send it all back to him.

“Don’t touch anything,” I called sweetly from the kitchen, stopping the ruckus. “I’m keeping it all.”

The ruckus started again. I pushed through them serenely with a crystal wine glass and the corkscrew. While they shouted, I opened a bottle, poured me some wine, sat down, and took a sip. It was better than I remembered. The shouts seemed to melt away as I sipped and a warm comforting feeling filled my belly. I sighed and began to look through the jewelry.

“Vervain,” Trevor sat down next to me, trying for a calmer tone. “You can’t mean to keep presents from him.”

“
Why not?” I held up a sparkling ruby earring. The gems were suspended from a wide gold umbrella shape and dangled down like fresh drops of blood. “It’s not like I love him or anything, so why should his presents bother you?”

“
Oh, I don’t know,” Trevor’s voice went up in volume again, “maybe because he’s the guy who kidnapped and raped you!”

“
We won, Honey-Eyes,” I put the earring down and looked over at Trevor. “He’s beaten. Look at the poem again. He’s heartbroken, the worst pain that anyone can feel. What more do you want? What worse revenge is there?”

“
Yeah but do you have to keep his stuff?” He leaned back and sighed.

“
I have seventy-seven lions to care for, if I need to, I can sell these plus the diamonds I had on when I left him. They should bring in a
lot
of money and I won't have to worry about the boys anymore. Or myself for that matter. Besides,” I held my glass out to him, “maybe you should try the wine before you make any rash decisions.”

He took the glass with another sigh and sipped at it. The sip turned into a swig and then he was draining the glass while he reached for the bottle.

“Hey,” I took the bottle away from him and poured a modest amount. “Savor it, don’t guzzle.”

The clunk of glasses on the table turned my eyes back to the others. Kirill and Vidar looked at me expectantly and I laughed as I poured them some. Kirill handed me a third glass to replace the one Trevor had stolen. I held my full glass up.

“To the beasts we are,” they clinked their glasses to mine, “and those we’ve conquered. May they never bite us in the ass again.”

I drank down my wine as the men did the same but the taste started to sour as the obvious finally occurred to me.

Anubis knew where I lived.

Chapter Thirty-Five

“Odin,” I called out as I knocked and was rewarded with a thump, a muffled oath, and heavy footsteps. The door of my old room in Valaskjálf opened to reveal a severely mussed, one-eyed god.

“
Vervain?” He smiled and opened the door wider, “Come in.”

I followed him over to the couch and automatically pulled a thick fur over my legs. He filled a mug of mead for me from the pot over the fire and soon I was warm and toasty but I still wasn’t sure how to start.

“Odin, I need to talk to you about something a little delicate,” when I looked up, he was looking around us curiously.

“
You’re alone?” He tilted his head. “Trevor has relaxed his guard finally?”

“
Uh, yeah for the moment,” I took a comforting sip. “I told him I needed to speak to you privately.”

“
Oh,” he looked away. “I understand, Vervain, you don’t have to spell it out for me. It happened and you want to pretend it didn’t. It’s okay, I won’t tell your wolf.”

“
No, honey,” I sighed and he glanced back. “Thank you for your understanding but this is about something else. There have been some side effects to the lioness magic.”

“
Side effects?” He sat up straight. “Are you okay?”

“
I’m fine,” oh shit, how was I going to say this? “It turns out that there are base urges that come with the magic, sort of like how wolves mate for life and so werewolves have a bonding ritual.”

“
You’re marrying Trevor,” he sounded so heartbroken.

“
No,” I leaned forward and took his hand. “Think about lions in nature, are they monogamous like wolves?”

His forehead creased, “In a way, I guess, the females are to the lion of the Pride.”

“Yes, in a normal Pride where there is one lion and the rest are females but…”

“
But your Pride is reversed,” Odin’s beautiful eye started to shine. “You are the alpha and so they are faithful to you.”

“
Uh-huh,” I looked at him expectantly, hoping he’d finish it so I wouldn’t have to.

“
But you would not be… monogamous,” his jaw fell open.

“
Right,” I let go of his hand to sit back into the couch. “I’ve had some powerful feelings lately and they’ve influenced not only me but Trevor as well. It seems that it’s part of the lioness magic, my alpha mate will be fine with me having others, as long as he approves of them first. They have to be part of our Pack… er, Pride… family, whatever.”

“
So you’ll be taking lovers,” Odin was watching me carefully.

“
Yes but before you get your hopes up, Trevor has vetoed you.” I finally met his gaze and the hurt there made me look away again. “Its not my choice, you know I still love you and I would jump at the chance to have you back but I think that may be the problem. Trevor’s threatened by you and he refuses to allow you to be with me. I think he feels that you’d replace him as alpha. I’m sorry, I wanted you to hear it from me.”

“
So I’m to stand aside and watch you take not only the wolf to your bed but others as well?”

“
I think the word
watch
isn’t exactly appropriate for that sentence,” I smiled a little helplessly at him.

“
I never thought of you as cruel, Vervain.”

“
It’s not my choice,” I looked away and swallowed back the tears. Why did Trevor have to be so stubborn?

“
What about Thor,” Odin’s bitter voice brought my gaze back to his, “have you talked about adding him to your list of lovers?”

My heart leapt. I hadn’t considered Thor. “No, we’ve only just found out about it all. We haven’t discussed any other potentials.”

“So I was your first consideration? Well, there’s that at least.” Something must have shown on my face because his turned from vague acceptance to suspicion. “Or was I? There’s something you haven’t told me.”

“
As you know,” I cleared my throat and tried to keep eye contact. “Kirill lives with us.”

“
I should have guessed,” he shook his head and fell back against the couch. “I suppose he’s passed Trevor’s test with flying colors.”

“
In a way,” I couldn’t help it, my face flushed.

“
You’ve already taken him to bed, haven’t you?”

“
It just kind of happened.”

“
Like the day we made love?” He sat up and went to the floor in front of me while his hands gripped mine. “Was what happened between us part of this new magic?”

“
I don’t know,” I blinked slowly.

I’d assumed it was all because of Anubis’ cold but maybe there was more to it than that. I’d been missing Odin in a very physical way, ever since I started having memories of him, so I never considered that the increase in my attraction to him could have stemmed from a magical source. What if it was part of my new magic? What exactly did that mean for us?

“Am I not already a part of your Pride then?” Odin’s grip had tightened and his eye was gleaming. “You’ve already accepted me as a lover.”

I started to hope too until I remembered an integral point. “Even if that were true, Trevor still doesn’t accept you and I can’t push him in this. He’s lost the chance of having me all to himself and that’s a lot for any man to take but for a wolf, it’s especially hard. I need to let him have something in his control and I want him to be as happy as possible. You and I together would not make him happy.”

“But it would make you happy,” he reached for my waist and pulled me down into his lap. “Does that count for nothing?”

“
He’s already done quite a lot for my happiness,” I knew I should get up but my limbs just weren’t following orders. I think they were on strike.

“
I can do more,” Odin’s lips brushed mine. “I’d do anything to make you happy.”

The carpet was soft under my back and I had no idea how I’d wound up down there. I frowned and looked around but Odin reclaimed my attention with a masterful nibble on my neck. I sighed and raised my hands to thread through his hair. It was softer than I remembered.

With a tortured moan, I pulled him in tighter. There was only so much I could take. My hormones were in overdrive and here was this gorgeous god who was promising me everything and trying his damnest to come through immediately. Not only that, I loved him and that love was more overpowering than any physical pleasure.

I’d had a taste of him before but that had been with a cold heart. My heart was anything but cold at the moment. It was beating erratically and filled with memories of the man in my arms. Love was too small a word for what I felt. The emotions that raged in me were beyond love, too wild, too intense to be bound by such a simple word, too rapturous to be labeled at all.

I looked up into Odin’s face and it was like several thin films had layered themselves over him. He was Odin now but he was also then. He was one-eyed and whole all at once, the god I loved then and the man I loved now. He was everything and our love was eternal.

He shifted and the layers fell away. My memories peeled back and I was left with the warm man in my arms. All I could think was
How? How could I have been separated from him for so long and still thought of myself as alive? How could I have forgotten this feeling? How could I have let it go… let him go?