Authors: Daisy Banks
He winked at Nin. “It’s a disgrace. You see how roughly I’m handled.” He kissed Cecile’s cheek and moved from her embrace. “Do you all want to come down to the stables and see the pony that will take Nin home?”
Cecile, who held Rollo’s hand, beamed. “Oh, yes!”
“Do you think you can walk down to the courtyard?” Tab asked Nin.
“To see a pony I’ll manage it.” She winced as she stood, but nodded, grateful for Cassandra’s gift, which meant she had no need to walk the distance back to the tower.
“You two go ahead. We’ll meet you in a few moments when Nin has these socks on.” Tab waved her hands to usher Rollo and Cecile out the door. “Here, Nin.” She rummaged in the satchel for a few moments before she took a pair of long socks out of the leather bag. “We were certain these would fit.”
Nin took off the loose bindings so she could pull the socks on. They were thick, comfortable, and cushioned her feet when she stood. “I can’t thank you enough.”
“Oh, nonsense, we have to help each other, those of us with the mark. We only put a few bits and pieces in the bag. The kind of things we thought you might like. You know, perfume, a comb, a couple of spare petticoats, oh, and a nightgown. We know the tradition. You left the village barefoot with nothing. We didn’t think the Mage would have such things for you.”
She’d not expected to find such generosity here. “I can’t begin to thank you and Cecile.”
Tab smiled and wrapped an arm though hers. “We’re happy to share with you. Shall we go down to the stable to look at this pony?”
* * * *
The stables smelled of straw, heat, and horse sweat. Rollo led out a pony, its coat a snowy white, so it gleamed like a star in the twilight. Almost afraid to touch, Nin reached up and stroked along his strong neck. One dark eye held hers while she rubbed her hand over him.
All her childhood, she had dreamed such an animal would be hers, and with his bright, intelligent eyes, this pony fulfilled all those dreams. A huge swell of gratitude to Cassandra surged through her. No one had ever been so generous, apart from Thabit, but his generosity was different. “What’s his name?” she asked.
Rollo rubbed his hand over the pony’s ears. “He’s called Ice. The stable master here is not the most original of souls when it comes to names. Ice is a good little beast, and he will bear you safely. I’ll make sure you get a supply of winter fodder for him later in the year.”
“Oh, I think I will be back here by then. The lady wants me to come and study.”
Tab and Cecile cried out and wrapped her in their embrace.
Tab pressed a kiss to Nin’s cheek. “Wonderful, I am glad. We can all look forward to the autumn celebrations. We will have a marvelous winter together.”
When Rollo led him back into the stables, the pony snorted and stamped a dark hoof as though loath to leave Nin.
Cecile lingered behind with Rollo, and neither Nin nor Tab looked back at the young lovers’ farewells in the shadows.
“She’ll probably marry him in the next couple of years,” Tab said with a sigh as they headed back into the castle. “I’ll miss her.”
“I’ll miss you both until Samhain.”
“Not to worry. You’ll join us for a while, and just think, Nin, you will have all summer with your Mage.”
The last of the twilight lit the sky above the towers and turrets. A speckle of the first stars gleamed in the lavender blue. She hadn’t seen him for hours.
Should he have been away so long? Where was he?
They walked slowly back to the comfortable workroom and sat by the fire. Lady Cassandra arrived. “Nin, can you be ready to leave soon? The Mage has spoken with my brother. I’m afraid Thabit only took a little of the potion we made. The rest, I have bottled for him to have when he gets back to the tower. You must see he drinks all of it. Do you know the way back well?”
“The Mage knows the way. I’ll be with him,” she said.
“I’m afraid he is a little woozy still. I wish he would stay, but he won’t. I’d give him a horse, but he refuses to ride. I’m afraid there are times when he can be a little stubborn.”
She gave a nod, and though her feet weren’t right yet, she stood to give Tab a hug, then one for Cecile, who had just entered the room, face flushed and smiling. “I’ll see you soon. Thank you both so much.”
The satchel clutched tight, Nin followed Cassandra back to the courtyard where the pony waited. Rollo held the bridle, and next to him, stood the Mage.
The yellow hood of the magnificent embroidered robe covered his head. She could not see his face in its depths. When she got closer and looked up inside the shadow, his eyes took her breath. The flicker of light from the torches at the castle entrance showed his pupils dilated, like huge, black tunnels in his pallid face. He swayed slightly.
She bit at her lip and glanced to Cassandra.
Was he able to walk the distance to the tower? He looked as though he might collapse at the first puff of breeze. How would she keep the wolves off him if they attacked? Could he manage to walk through the forest?
He nodded, swept a hand toward the ground, and then on up toward the sky. “Yes, I need the earth beneath my feet and stars above me, and so we will go.”
Rollo, who shook his head, tied the satchel to the pony’s saddle.
“Good-bye, Nin, and remember our conversations. Mage, until we meet again, good journey to you.” Cassandra dipped into a curtsey.
Nin returned the gesture while the Mage stiffly bowed his head.
Apprehension filled her even with Cassandra’s smile of encouragement. Rollo helped her up into the saddle while the Mage held the bridle.
“Good-bye, my lady, and thank you,” she called back as the pony stepped out.
Cassandra waved to them from the great entrance.
“Good journey.” Rollo’s voice carried to her as they headed down the causeway.
Thabit swayed with each step as they crossed over the drawbridge to take the path back to the forest. The Mage reeled and weaved, mumbling strange words that made the pony nervous.
She prayed Thabit’s condition would improve the more he walked. The forest path, all darkness and deep shadows, did little to still her fears. Occasional patches of bright moonlight relieved the gloom.
The novelty of sitting the pony faded, and she grew uncomfortable after they had gone some distance. They entered the next pool of moonlight. Snatches of a tune reached her for the Mage sang to himself. His words were unfamiliar, but their rhythms lulled her, and his tone was one she’d like to hear again.
Was it a love song?
He hadn’t tripped over anything for a while. Perhaps the effects of the mushroom brew had begun to wear off. She had no idea it would make him like this. Thabit lurched like Crispin who tottered through the market square when he got drunk.
Crispin’s stumbles had always made her laugh, but the Mage did not. The power Thabit possessed, he often hid, his skill veiled by his rare smile or his more usual frown. The intensity of his magic surged around him. Not since the night in the cage had she been so alone.
She didn’t like him like this.
The moon had begun to edge down the sky when the tower came into view.
“Peace,” he mumbled. He gave a great sigh and then glanced back toward her. “Well, it was once. Now I’ve got you instead.” His shoulders shook as he chuckled quietly to himself and walked on.
They headed down the path and toward the tower.
He thought she’d broken his peace and destroyed what he wanted. Their kiss was a lie to cheat her.
He didn’t want her at all.
She could not still her shaking and clung to the pony’s reins.
They entered the yard, and while the Mage fumbled with the pouch on his belt, she struggled from the saddle. Her fingers as clumsy as her feet, she clambered down from Ice’s back. Having no other option, she hitched the bridle to the low branch of a tree. The pony would be safe enough this close to the tower.
Despite Thabit’s mutters, she did not look over to the door as she unhooked the satchel filled with Tab and Cecile’s gifts.
A wedge of light on the rocky ground told her Thabit had managed to open the door. She struggled to lift the heavy saddle from Ice’s back. Her heart ached and she stroked the pony’s cheek. Ice puffed warmth onto her hands and he whickered, lifting his head to nudge her arm.
She limped over to the well, fetched a bucket of water, and left it beside the pony. It would do for now. Tomorrow she would see what could be done for a stable.
The tower door stood open. Thabit had not waited for her, but gone inside.
Should he be as dreadful tomorrow, she’d ride the pony back to the castle and kindness
.
She struggled with the straps on the saddle but managed to haul the weight down off Ice’s back. Her heart hammered as she picked up the leather satchel and limped slowly inside into the kitchen.
Thabit sat at the table in the gloom. He drank from a large cup, one rimmed with silver she had not seen him use before. She recognized the scent of hops. He had pushed his hood back. The torchlight caught his face and his features tore at her heart. Gaunt, haggard, his skin dull and ashen, and his eyes remained almost all dark pupils. His hand holding the cup shook, and all her hopes for that night vanished.
She could not lie with him when he made her think of Crispin. She doubted he could climb the stairs to his room, let alone take her to his bed. Though she sensed a kind of danger from him she’d never known before, still she asked, “Shall I help you to bed?”
He lifted his wild-eyed gaze to her. The metal-bound cup landed on the table with a clank. “Surely you shall and lie with me until dawn.”
She froze at his expression. There would be no tenderness in him tonight. Desire snaked around the room, and she moved back a step. Fear churned her stomach.
“What’s wrong? Called your bluff, have I? You’re not willing all of a sudden?”
She fought to still the ache in her heart, and used the sudden flash of anger instead. “You’re worse than drunk, and no, I’m not willing. I doubt I ever will be. I thought you were better than this.” She dumped the satchel on the floor. “You go to your room. Leave me in peace.”
She swallowed hard. He wasn’t as Agnes said. Or was he?
“Ha, sharp tonight, Swwwarrow.” His words slurred. The chair slid back as he hauled himself up. His body weaved from side to side and he reached out. He stumbled, grasping her waist hard with one hand and the table with his other.
The smell of the brew he’d finished caught at her senses as he bent to kiss her. Fury blazed through her at the touch of his palm on her breast. She struggled to break his tight embrace, but couldn’t. In desperation, she slapped his face with all her force. The blow echoed from the walls. He didn’t flinch.
He took one deep breath after another before he finally slid his hand down to her waist and released her. She backed off swift. Breathless herself now, she darted a glance around the room to see how close the door might be to her fumbling hand.
“Sorry, I can’t,” he mumbled, and staggered across the room toward the stairs.
“Go sleep it off!” A tide of anger swamped her.
His footsteps on the stairs trod heavy, and twice, loud bumps thumped on the walls. At last, a door creaked open, the hinges squeaked again, and a thud followed.
Had he fallen?
She stood motionless, while images of him with a broken head filled her thoughts, but she wouldn’t go up to see.
No fire burned in the hearth. The one torch gave flickers of light, but too fearful, despondent, and too tired to do anything else, she laid down on the pallet.
Her blanket still hung in the tree from the morning when her hopes had been so high. She huddled in her gown for warmth and bit her lip. All her senses refused to relax in case he returned. Time passed with no sound from above. Her anger ebbed, and she dwelt on her expectations of this night. Tears stung for the loss. Surely, Cassandra couldn’t have been wrong. The beautiful lady had said Thabit would love her. Right now, she could scarce believe Cassandra’s words might be true.
The brightness of dawn glimmered through the small window before she slept.
The sun shadows showed well past noon, and though he didn’t want to wake her, she should rise.
He’d woken a little earlier, sickened, and his head throbbed still. The effects of the scrying danced around him. “Sparrow, wake up.”
Her eyelids flew open at his briefest touch to her shoulder. Horror gripped his gut, as huge, dark pools of fear stared back at him.
“Oh, no.” He backed off.
She sat up and crossed her arms tight over her breasts. Her expression pierced him sharp as a lance.
“It was the brew. Please, Sparrow, forgive me? I have no memory of our return.”
Gods!
He stepped back from the accusation in her glance. If he had taken her, he didn’t know it. What a waste if he had done so, and probably badly. Even worse, he couldn’t remember the moment he made her his.
The quiver of her chin spoke for her. Whatever he’d done, he’d hurt her. The wave of guilt rose nauseous. He always suffered after the seeing brew. Even now, his senses remained heightened. The fabric of his green robe tingled like fur on his body to entice his flesh to demands of its own. All of him twitched painfully alive. Even her scent tormented him.
“You were horrible last night. I think it would be best if I left and went to the castle.”
I didn’t take her! Did I?
He sat on a stool by the table, poured from the jug, and gulped down a long draught of water. She moved from the bed. The glorious red gown still enhanced all her attractions. If he had taken her, at least he hadn’t torn the thing from her flesh.
“What did I…?” He waited breathless for her reply.
“If you mean did you force me into your bed, the answer is no. If you mean did you sound evil enough to do it, the answer is yes. If you mean did you make me feel like you hated me, the answer is yes. So, I don’t like
you
very much today.”
She skirted the edge of the table and used the water jug to get a drink.
Relief coursed through him. At least he hadn’t let go completely, but he’d done quite enough to alter their relationship. Like a tear in his spirit, no matter how he tried to mend the situation, her belief in him was damaged for eternity. “I can only say I am sorry. The seeing brew always has a deep effect. Yesterday’s was much stronger than I thought it would be, and lasted longer. Try to forget what I did or said. It wasn’t real.”