Authors: M.J. Trow
He leaned across and kissed her. âYou wouldn't have me any other way,' he smiled.
âMaybe yes, maybe no,' she told him.
âWhich brings us to murder three.'
âLet me rein you in there, Don Quixote.' She wagged a finger at him. âI'll grant you Martita Winchcombe was murder. Jane said the SOCO
evidence was overwhelming. The jury's still out on Goodacre. And as for Dan Bartlettâ¦who knows?'
âJane Bloody Blaisedell, for one!' Maxwell told her, as their conversation came full circle. âAnd this, in the parlance of Fifties cinema, is where I came in.'
âI've got to tread softly here, Max,' she told him.
âOf course, sweetstuff,' he beamed. âI understand. But do at least
tread
, there's a good girl. Shall I tell you something odd?'
âWhat's that?'
âWhen I had my last conversation with Martita Winchcombe, on the night she died, it was Dan Bartlett who interrupted us.'
âSo?'
âSo, until earlier tonight, I sort of had the late Artistic Director in the frame. He seemed anxious to shut the old girl up, warn me off, dismissing her as barking. Perhaps, I thought, he wanted to shut her up permanently.'
âThen he upped and died,' Jacquie said.
âPrecisely,' Maxwell nodded, half talking to himself. âNow why would he do a thing like that?'
Â
âWho's on last movements?' DCI Hall wanted to know. That Wednesday morning saw a tired and tetchy Incident Room. Henry Hall had had no choice now but to create one and they'd moved out of the overcrowded nick, lock, stock and computer system, to Tottingleigh. Yes, the public would
murmur; yes, some might over-react; but
some
might just provide answers.
âThat's me, guv.' Tom O'Connell was still wrestling with his tuna mayo wrap, which he felt he'd better ditch in preference to spraying everybody with its contents. He lunged for his notepad, buried under piles of bumf. âWe've got an approximate time of death from Dr Astley of ten to ten-thirty. Bartlett was found by his wife the next morning, i.e. twenty-four hours ago. We know from Ashley Wilkes, the theatre manager, that Bartlett was at the Arquebus the previous day, i.e. the one in question.'
Jane Blaisedell leaned across to an oppo at her elbow. âRemind me how he made DS again,' she hissed in an aside.
âWhat time was that?' Hall wanted it narrowed down so that the whiteboard made sense.
âEr⦠Half-two,' O'Connell confirmed. âHe and Wilkes were going over plans for a possible theatre extension that's in the consultative stage.'
âIs that a general erection,' Jane whispered, âor something specific?'
âJust the two of them?' Hall asked.
âUmâ¦' O'Connell was double-checking. Didn't want to get it wrong in front of the DCI. âMrs Goodacre joined them at one point. That was somewhere around four. She stayed for an hour, then left. The meeting between Wilkes and Bartlett broke up about six.'
âWhat then?'
âWilkes knocked off for the night and left Bartlett to oversee the rehearsal.'
âWhat rehearsal?' Hall was putting them through their paces.
â
Little Shop of Horrors
, Leighford High School,' the DS told him.
âWhat time was that?'
âErâ¦rehearsal began at seven, finished a little before nine.'
âWho was on that?' Hall scanned the murder team ranged before him, faces he knew, men and women he trusted.
âThat's me, guv,' Gavin Henslow admitted. âI spoke to the producer. A woman called Deena Harrison. She said the rehearsal finished at eight-fifty and they all went home. Bartlett was still in the theatre, as far as she knew, when they left.'
âAnd Peter Maxwell?' Hall felt he had no choice but to ask.
âGuv?' Henslow felt a little out of the loop on this, fast-track graduate or not.
âPeter Maxwell,' Hall sighed with the air of a man worn down by the cares of the world. âHead of Sixth Form at Leighford High.'
Ripples of comment ran round the room and Hall let it happen. He did catch the phrase âinterfering bastard' a few times. âI understand he's keeping an eye on rehearsals.' He looked straight at Jane Blaisedell, when it came to Maxwell his
right-hand woman. âDid you talk to him, Gavin?'
âErâ¦no, guv; sorry.'
Many people had been sorry they hadn't talked to Peter Maxwell and some of them wore blue uniforms. âFollow it up,' Hall ordered. âWhat about the cast?'
âKids,' Henslow shrugged. âThe couple I spoke to didn't seem to understand the question. There was aâ¦Sally Spall. Downtrodden little thing with a lisp. Umâ¦Alan Eldridge â he plays Seymourâ¦'
âYes, I don't think we need the entire programme notes here, Gavin,' Hall interrupted to the accompaniment of sniggers. âDid any of them tell you anything relevant to Bartlett?'
âNo, sir,' Henslow admitted. âNot a sausage.'
âGo into Leighford High tomorrow,' Hall said. âJane, go with him. I want exact confirmation of Bartlett's movements on the day he died. He was a stickler for timings. Should be easy to chronicle. Giles, the dead man's computer?'
Finch-Friezely blew outward at the memory of the task he'd been on for what seemed the last twenty-four hours solid. âVast amount of luvvie stuff,' he told the Incident Room. âOld Vic, National Youth Theatre, begging letters to Kevin Spacey, Tim Rice, the Arts Council.'
âAnything private?'
âErâ¦thirty-eight unidentified females in regular or casual correspondence via his emails.'
âWe have names?'
âOf a sort,' Finch-Friezely snorted. âDimples springs to mind. Cuddlekins, Lash La Rue. I think we can assume the late Mr Bartlett lived life to the full.' That the team could still raise chuckles was a good sign.
âThey'll need to be checked out,' Hall said. âEspecially in the light of testimony from his
ex-wife
.'
âHelluva lot of femmes to cherchez, guv,'
Finch-Friezely
whinged.
âWelcome to Murder Squad, sonny,' Hall nodded, having heard it all before. He wasn't a man interested in moans or requests for overtime. He seemed to remember having a family once. âBill, what have we got on the man's bungalow, apart from dodgy electrics?'
âSigns of female visitation,' DS Robbins said. âAnd recent. He had at least one visitor on the evening he died.'
âDo we know who?'
Robbins shook his head. âNo.'
âPrints?'
âUh-huh. Saliva on a glass.'
âThat's all?'
âAt the moment.'
âBedroom?'
âHis bed hadn't been slept in. SOCO are still working on the sheets, but we're not hopeful.'
âRight.' Hall was scanning the whiteboard now, looking at the chain of events, the circumstantial
links that marked a man's passing. âSo the last time Bartlett was seen by more than one person was at the Arquebus at shortly before nine. Presumably he drove home in that his car was in his garage; and he had a female visitor at some time after that who took at least one drink. No evidence of sex.'
âProbably did it on top of the wardrobe,' was Giles Finch-Friezely's suggestion. Everyone looked at him a little oddly. Perhaps that was the way your mind worked when you had a double-barrelled name at a comprehensive.
âWe know from Astley,' Hall swept on, âthat Bartlett was dripping wet when he died â in fact, it was a combination of water and shredded cable that killed him. The bath was full of cold water, which was presumably hot when he left it on his way to meet his maker.'
Jane Blaisedell looked up at the guv'nor. He wasn't usually so poetic.
âCalm Me, guv,' Finch-Friezely said. Everyone looked at him again. âIt's the stuff in the bath,' he explained quickly. âRelaxing foam.'
âDid he have a little duck too?' Henslow grinned. Guffaws all round.
âPeople, people,' Hall's quiet, sensible voice brought them back into line; men who were tired, women who were wilting. âWe're missing something here. Why did Dan Bartlett get out of the bath, having got in?'
âSomebody at the door?' DS Robbins suggested.
âPerhaps,' Hall nodded, slowly.
âSomebody on the phone,' Jane Blaisedell volunteered.
âRight.' Hall leaned forward, supporting his weight with his hands on the cluttered desk. âHas anybody checked Dan Bartlett's phone?'
Nobody had.
Time for action.
Kick ass.
In the beginning, God made chief constables. Whether He made them in His own image was difficult to say, but that was more or less how Derek Slater saw it. But then, as he
was
Chief Constable, he would, wouldn't he?
Henry Hall wasn't so sure, especially that Wednesday as the purple clouds over Winchester gathered and rolled, the glittering bars of dying sun between them like a cosy, electric fire you remembered always burning at your granny's. The point was that Hall had been at the joint Hampshire/West Sussex Police Service Symposium now for the best part of six hours. It was, as usual, all about targets and community relations and PR and ethnic sensitivity. Nobody mentioned the cops and the robbers at all. It seemed more like a fortnight had passed by the time it was his turn to sit across the Chief Constabularian desk and look the man in the face.
It was the silver braid you saw first, as with all
senior policemen, contrasting with the battleship grey habitually worn by the DCI. Then, Hall's attention was drawn to the curious centre parting and the small, dark, dancing eyes. Every move was precision, every mannerism choreographed. Derek Slater had nervous breakdown written all over him.
âTo cases, Henry,' he said, shuffling papers like a fastidious faro dealer and peering over his impossibly antiquated pince-nez. âThis business at the Arquebus in Leighford. What progress?'
âWell, sir,' Hall was the picture of unflappable immobility. âI'm not sure the link is as obvious as it seems.'
âOh? And what do you think the link is?'
Henry Hall, had he been a flippant man, would have said it was a mobile phone shop. Peter Maxwell, had he been asked, would have said it was a pro-Nazi organisation in Thirties England. Horses for courses. Neither quip crossed the Chief Constable's desk. âThe theatre itself, sir.'
âUh-huh,' Slater nodded, as though Hall was outlining the various theories of the origin of the universe. âSay on.'
âGordon Goodacre dies in the theatre.' Hall felt he'd better guide the man. It had probably been a long time since he'd been directly involved in a case at all, still less a murder. âActually on stage. Martita Winchcombe was the place's Treasurer. Daniel Bartlett was its Artistic Director. I don't really see how I can be clearer.'
âNo.' Slater cleared his throat. âQuite. Quite.'
âNow, we could be looking at some sort of conspiracyâ¦' and as soon as the words left Henry Hall's lips, he regretted them.
âAh, so you're a conspirationist, are you, Henry?' Slater's slightly twisted smile seemed smarmier than ever.
âIf you mean, can more than one person be involved in the commission of a crime, indubitably. Burke and Hare, Leopold and Loeb, Craig and Bentley.'
âThat's
folie à deux
, surely?' Slater was anxious to outsmart his longest-serving DCI and Henry Hall had a killer to catch. Neither of them had time for the niceties of criminal history.
âIt is possible that there is some common ground relating to the theatre we haven't uncovered yet. We're still checking the books, for example.'
âMiss Winchcombe's?'
âNot exactly. She was Treasurer only in a nominal sense by virtue of her long association with the place. The finances are actually handled by a committee spearheaded by Ashley Wilkes, the Manager. They are regulated by the expertise of the theatre's secretary, Patrick Collinson, in that he is a Chartered Accountant.'
âAnything untoward there?'
âAs I said, sir, we're still checking. You know how long financial checks can take.'
Slater nodded wisely, but Henry Hall knew men
like him. Peter Maxwell believed Hall to be a copper of the new school, all graduate and
fast-track
and smart alecry. By comparison with men like Slater, Hall was Dixon of Dock Green meets Inspector Lestrade.
âWhat's known about these victims?' the Chief Constable wanted to know. âAnything in their background?'
âAgain, sir, it's under way. A murder inquiry is a slow business.'
âAnd three murder inquiries three times as slow, eh?' Rosters. Timesheets. Expenses. Those things were bread and butter to Slater. He'd long forgotten, if he ever knew, the human cost of murder.
Hall shrugged.
âYour report casts doubt on the first one. No evidence of murder at all.'
âThat's right. No doubts about the others, though. And they're definitely linked.'
âHow so?'
âSimilar MO,' Hall told him. âBoth Martita Winchcombe and Daniel Bartlett died in their homes, both as a result of an apparent accident. And both, incidentally, quite sloppy.'
âSo we're not talking about a hit man, here? A contract killing?'
âNo, sir. Definitely not.'
âSo what are we talking about?'
Hall twisted a little in his chair. Squirming might
have to come later. âI'm not sure yet,' he said. âLet's just say I'm keeping an open mind.'
The Chief Constable leaned back in the large swivel obliging taxpayers had bought for him. He had an odd look on his face. âAre you?' he beamed. âYou don't know how glad I am to hear you say that.'
âReally?' Hall's eyebrows appeared over his glasses' rim. He was beginning to smell a rodent.
The Chief Constable slid a business card across his desk and got up and strolled to the window. He gazed down on the well-kept lawns that fell away from police HQ and the knots of coppers, in and out of uniform, waiting in the car park at the end of a long day. When he turned back, Henry Hall sat there open-mouthed.
âA psychic consultant?' he said.
Slater sat back down. âDon't knock it till you've tried it,' he said. âModern policing, Henry. No barriers. No frontiers. Pushing the limits. Testing the water. We've worked inside the system. Dammit, we
are
the system.' He got off his soap box and relaxed, the little pulse in his neck subsiding. âAnd we're not getting results, are we? What have we been hearing all day, from both Services, West Sussex and Hampshire? The public don't trust us. The public don't like us. We're not getting results. Henry,' he leaned towards his man. âWe're not getting closure.'
What a ghastly word, Henry Hall thought. Peter Maxwell would have had a fit.
âAnd you think this will help?'
âIt's been done, Henry,' Slater frowned. âIt's a proven aid. I've just come back from the States. No less than eighty-one police authorities use psychic investigation as routine. So does the FBI.'
And the Pinkertons, no doubt, thought Hall, but perhaps this wasn't the place to say so.
âThink about it, Henry,' Slater urged. âThere was a time when DNA was rubbished by the police service. Fingerprints; Hell, there was a time when unless a man was caught red-handed, there'd be no prosecution at all. I want that open mind of yours on this.'
âSo you're suggesting I try thisâ¦Magda Lupescu.'
Slater frowned, leaning back in his chair to remind Hall of the operational gulf between them. âI'm not suggesting, Henry,' he said. âI'm ordering it.'
Â
That was the morning they came for Peter Maxwell, in a body. Like Father Gapon leading his thousands to the Winter Palace on Bloody Sunday long, long ago in the snow of a tragic year, Dominic Reynolds thudded down the mezzanine corridor on his way to the Great Man's office. Mad Max was Head of Sixth Form, like Nicholas II was the Father of All the Russias. He would understand. Behind Reynolds trooped his cast of thousands â Sally Spall of the broken heart, who played Audrey; Andy
Grant as the mad dentist; Sian Golding, Woman in Shop; Alan Eldridge, geekier than Seymour; David Balham, colliding with the corridor corners; and all of the Tendrils, without a ra-ra or a beehive in sight.
Unlike Tsar Nicholas back at the Winter Palace, Mad Max was at home. His number two, Helen Maitland, not unused to trouble herself, beat a tactical retreat and let her Lord and Master deal with this one. She was a good woman, was Helen. Large and white, hence her nickname, the Fridge. Maxwell could rely on her in a crisis. But she'd spread herself a little thin recently â let Max take the heat for a bit. And he'd seen it all in his time â the Shorts Issue, the Skirt Length Controversy, the Smoking Room Remonstrance, the Mobile Phone Texting Civil Liberties Debate. He'd fielded them all with a mixture of bonhomie, cold reason, wheedling and, it had to be said, a long time ago, a couple of cuffs round the ear. That was the way with Enlightened Despots. And they didn't come much more enlightened, or more despotic, than Peter Maxwell.
âSo,' Maxwell settled into his chair as they all squeezed into his office. âWho's going to bell the cat?'
âSir?' Benny Barker spoke from the back. Maxwell hadn't even seen him come in.
âWho's doing the talking?' It was pure Humphrey Bogart but no one in the room was old enough to realise.
Sally nudged Dominic. âGo on,' she hissed in one of her best stage asides.
âIt's Miss Harrison, sir,' the plump lad said. âDeena. She's impossible.'
Maxwell had seen this building for some time and the appearance of the disgruntled mob didn't surprise him in the least. He was just glad they weren't wielding scythes and pitchforks and grumbling
à bas les aristos
. âGo on,' he said.
âWell, she's mad, Mr Maxwell.' Sally couldn't simply stand there while Dominic lost his bottle. She had to strike a blow for womankind. Alan looked geekier than ever and if there was ever a moment that proved how miscast Andy was as the psycho dentist, this was it.
âSo am I, Sally,' Maxwell smiled.
âAh, yes, butâ¦no, but, I meanâ¦' Sally blushed bright crimson. âNo, I mean you'reâ¦'
âMad nor-nor-west,' Maxwell helped her out, although the Bardic quotation was sadly lost on the A-level Theatre student. âGood of you to notice.'
âShe's a nutter, sir,' Benny chimed in. âMr Maxwell, may I speak freely?'
Maxwell spread his arms in a beatific gesture. This was the twenty-first century. Titles had been abolished and women had the vote. The end of civilisation.
âShe's a fuckin' nutter.'
Some of the demonstrators froze. Others grinned sheepishly. All of them watched Maxwell. What
would the Great Man do? They'd all heard since Year Seven that he once hung a kid from the school flagpole for swearing. And some of them believed it.
âCome off the fence, now, Benny,' Maxwell growled with a smile in his voice. âLet's analyse this, my children. Spread yourselves.'
One by one they found chairs or arms of chairs or corners of carpets, sitting at the Great Man's knee. âLet's see. You want Mrs Carmichael back, right?'
There were nods and grunts and âhear, hear's in all directions. Benny whistled. âAnd you want the smoking ban lifted and a bar in the Common Room and free contraception and the abolition of exams and⦠Anybody catching my drift, yet?'
They all were, but nobody said so.
âBut if we said you could smoke, some of you wouldn't want to and there'd be howls of complaint about passive smoking and you'd upset the government initiatives of that nice Mr Blair. If we put a bar in the Common Room, Benny, you'd whinge about the price and Sian, you wouldn't like the pork scratchings. Rijiura,' he singled out a Tendril, âit would be against your religion and you'd be torn by impossible peer pressure. If we gave out free contraception, there'd be naughty fumblings in dark cornersâ¦sorry, even more naughty fumblings than there are nowâ¦'
A ripple of laughter.
âAnd if we abolished exams, how would we decide who were the chiefs and who were the Indians? We'd be consigning you to a lifetime of filling shelves at Tesco's â oh, no offence, Dominic.'
The Mr Mushnik of Leighford High grinned. Many was the bottle of Southern Comfort he'd passed obligingly to Mr Maxwell on his trolley runs.
âThat's not the real world, people,' Maxwell told them, looking into each and every disappointed face. âI could have a word with Mr Diamond and I could probably persuade him to dispense with Miss Harrison's services. And then what? You'd have no show. Nothing. Mrs Carmichael's just not well enough. If she knew what you guys were going through now, she'd jump through hoops to come back; you know she would.'
Some of them nodded. All of them agreed.
âAnd she might just lose her baby.
That's
the real world.'
The grumblers had stopped grumbling, the back row element a rabble no more. They knew he was right. Bugger Mad Max. He was
always
right.
âOK,' Maxwell had done it again. âGuys? OK?' The Americanisation of Emily was extending to Peter. âSo Deena shouts at you. Why?' He held up his hand. âNo, Benny, she's not a fucking nutter. Sally, you miss a note. What does Deena do?'
âCalls me useless.' The girl looked close to tears, lisping more than ever.
Maxwell nodded. âAndy, you miss your entry cue. What happens?'
âShe bawls me out,' the scrawny dentist said. âIn front of everybody.'
Maxwell nodded again. âTendrils, the dance routine goes haywire. Deena's reaction?'
They looked at each other, unsure, unsettled, looking for an answer.
âShe's cross with us,' Tina Morgan suggested.
âRight. Now see it from Deena's point of view. She's not much older than you. And she doesn't know any of you. She's got a helluva job on and she's doing it out of the goodness of her heart. To help Mrs Carmichael. To help her old school. To help you. Nobody's paying her very much and it must seem, about now, to be a bit of a thankless task. Sally, you don't miss notes. You sing like an angel â I know, I've heard you. Get it right next time. Andy, you've trod the boards before â your Sweeney Todd was legendary; what's with missing cues? Tendrils, how much rehearsal time do you need? Remember
Grease
?'