Melt (27 page)

Kelly hoped she could present a translation to Pippa that would please her. Pippa had not returned her calls and was presumably still angry at her for turning down her shocking offer of love. Kelly felt sorry for hurting her and wanted to make it up to her somehow.

As Mrs. Arensen worked, Kelly tried to imagine what the runes depicted, but she had no idea what a Viking might write on the wall of a cave. Maybe something equivalent to “Kilroy was here.” Or “This is Erik’s cave. Keep out!” Or something more poetic like, “There was a young girl from Elnesvågen…”

“This is an epitaph,” Mrs. Arensen announced, startling Kelly.

She rose to her knees to look at the paper with its many notes and scribbles. “An epitaph? Are you sure?”

“Ja, well, it is the most common thing we see. Stones erected at gravesites. They are all over the northern countries, in Iceland, Norway, the UK, everywhere the Vikings lived. Even after they took the Latin alphabet, they still used runes for gravesites because of the spiritual meaning. They usually say something like, So-and-so erected this stone or cut these runes for so-and-so, daughter or son of so-and-so. Some are long and complicated and some are simple, like this one.”

“What does it say?”

Mrs. Arensen read the message clearly. “For Torben, son of Asa.”

Kelly fell back to a sitting position, a chill running down her spine. “No, no,” she muttered. “It can’t say that.”

Mrs. Arensen took off her glasses and frowned with indignation. “It is a simple message. Not hard to translate. I have seen hundreds of these.”

Kelly struggled to recover from the shock of this discovery, her mind immediately grappling for logical explanations for the unbelievable coincidence of the name “Asa” from Pippa’s dream.

She leaned over the photo and said, “Where does it say Asa?”

Mrs. Arensen pointed to a series of three characters. “Right here. There is the character for ‘a’.”

“It looks like an ‘f’.”

“They do.”

But it wasn’t possible Pippa’s vision was real!

Maybe she was better at reading runes than she knew. Maybe, in her fevered state, drawing on subconscious knowledge, she had read this correctly and it had been the seed for her entire dream. Or maybe she had carved this message herself, in her delirium, and didn’t remember. If so, the official analysis would show that these markings were recently made.

Having latched onto two acceptable explanations, Kelly relaxed. But now she questioned the wisdom of presenting these findings to Pippa. She didn’t want to encourage her fantasy because of the inevitable disappointment she would face when the experts discovered the truth. If Pippa had made this carving herself, she was in for a seriously embarrassing outcome. Kelly was left with the unhappy conclusion that she couldn’t tell Pippa what the runes said after all.

Chapter Twenty-Six

Jordan sat by herself under the kitchen canopy drinking a beer. Fifty yards away, Brian, Malik and Julie played basketball on their makeshift court. The night was mild, still and comfortable. The sky was clear and the sun hung above the horizon, shining a golden orange light across the ice at the head of the fjord. It would have made a lovely picture, Jordan thought, and her mind conjured up an image of Kelly standing on the shore with a camera in hand.

Sonja wandered in and positioned herself a few feet away, leaning casually against the counter. Jordan ignored her and took another swallow of beer.

“I’ve just had a very interesting online chat with an old friend,” Sonja announced. When Jordan didn’t respond, she asked, “Do you want to know what it was about?”

“What possible reason could I have for wanting to know what you were chatting about to an old friend?”

Jordan was surprised and irritated that Sonja had sought her out this evening. She was still smarting from losing her temper earlier in the day. She was angrier at herself than she was at Sonja, and was embarrassed that all of her students had witnessed her breakdown and were moving gingerly around her as if they were afraid of setting her off again. She had taken dinner in her tent, eager to escape the awkwardness of a group meal. She had expected that Sonja would stay away from her tonight. By tomorrow it would all have blown over and they could go on as before, everybody pretending the whole thing had never happened and Sonja grateful for being given another chance. That was the plan in Jordan’s mind anyway, but Sonja was foolishly pushing her luck.

“I think you might be interested,” Sonja said smugly. “You see, my friend went to Cornell University. Years ago.”

Jordan’s interest was piqued, but she kept her eyes on the basketball game. “Good for her.”

“It was about eighteen years ago, actually.”

Jordan stiffened and lowered the beer bottle to the table.

Sonja swung into view in front of her, looking crafty and self-congratulatory. “I was just telling her about our work here and about you. Turns out she recognized your name. You didn’t know one another back then, but she had heard of you. You were at Cornell at the same time. She was just a freshman then and you were a graduate student.”

“What’s your point, Sonja?” Jordan was beginning to feel queasy, but doing her best to appear unruffled.

“She told me the whole story. Quite a little scandal, wasn’t it? You and your professor’s wife.”

“What makes you think the story is true?”

“I admit it doesn’t sound like you. A sordid love affair with a married woman, the wife of your thesis advisor, no less. But they say you left Cornell right after the story broke. And shortly after that, the Marquettes separated. A couple of details that give the story some credence, don’t you think?” Sonja smiled slyly. “A person could probably dig up a few more details if she worked at it.”

“Why would she do that?”

“I’m guessing this isn’t something you’re proud of. I’m guessing you wouldn’t like people to know. After all, you’re the cool-headed professional. Never a hair out of place, right? A messy sex scandal wouldn’t fit that image very well, would it? You had to leave Cornell because of it. What would it do to your reputation at Boulder if everybody there knew?”

Jordan choked down the anger welling up in her. “What do you want?”

Sonja smiled, a look of subdued triumph in her eyes. “I want to stay. After all, I haven’t actually done anything so awful. I misled you a little bit about Kelly because I wanted you for myself. But it’s not like I did something as reprehensible as, say, have an affair with a married woman.” Sonja lifted her chin haughtily. “Despite what you may think of me, I’m serious about my career. So I just want to stay and finish the job. And I want full credit. An A would be greatly appreciated.”

“Anything else? No pile of cash?”

“That’s all. I just want what I deserve.”

“And if I don’t think you deserve an A?”

Sonja smirked. “I think you’ll agree that I do.”

Jordan noticed Malik standing aside from the others at the basketball court, watching with concern. Sonja would tell him regardless, Jordan decided, because of their friendship. She wouldn’t be able to help herself. But would she tell the others? When they got home, would she start the rumor around campus and infect Jordan’s carefully cultivated reputation? She thought of her colleagues, her students, of losing their respect, becoming a laughingstock. If she had to leave Boulder, leave the area, how would she be able to continue her work at the ice core lab?

Would this old mistake never stop plaguing her?

She stood and faced Sonja. “If I agree?”

“Then I won’t tell anybody. Your secret is safe with me, Jordan.” Sonja gazed solemnly into her eyes, implying that they had a special bond between them now. “It’s kind of funny, but I’m glad to find out you were once capable of losing your head over love.”

Jordan swept past her and walked down to the dock. The glassy surface of the water reflected the high walls of the fjord on either side, broken only by a couple of small icebergs below the tongue of the glacier. It was colder down here than it was in camp. She stood with her arms wrapped around herself, staring absentmindedly at the water.

She resented Sonja’s self-righteous remark about her losing her head over love. At least she had said “love.” It wasn’t nearly so harsh or cynical as Marquette’s “piece of tail.” Of course Sonja was glad to know it. It gave her power. But that wasn’t what she meant. Jordan knew what she meant. She was glad to know that The Ice Queen was fallible, that she was not a superior being. She was human, like herself. People liked to see the flaws, as Kelly had said. She had loved Jordan because of her imperfections, not in spite of them.

People loved the underdog and the runt. Jordan didn’t want love, especially love tinged with pity. She wanted respect. There was no hint of respect left in Sonja. She had defeated her foe, had found her Achilles heel and had brought her down.

Jordan felt weary. She had spent so much time and energy trying to rise above her youthful mistakes. But there were still plenty of people who remembered, like Sonja’s friend. The worst thing, though, was that Jordan remembered. No matter what she did, no matter what her accomplishments, she could never escape the reality of her own imperfections. The veneer of control that protected her from the woman who could lose her head over love was thin and brittle, like a shallow sheet of ice on the surface of a lake. It was better not tested; the risk of drowning was too real.

The sound of her students at their game broke into her thoughts. She shivered, realizing she was chilled. She walked back to camp where Sonja stood next to the basketball court watching the others play. Jordan walked up to her and said, clearly and precisely, “I don’t accept your terms.”

Sonja looked surprised.

The basketball bounced off the edge of the rim and came toward Jordan. She caught it in both hands. “Do whatever you want,” she said to Sonja. “I really don’t care.”

She tossed the ball to Malik, who caught it, looking troubled. All of them stood motionless as Jordan walked to her tent.

She sat at her desk, hearing nothing outside. They had apparently quit playing. Now Sonja was telling them her tale, embellishing it, no doubt, with imagined details.

It wasn’t true that Jordan didn’t care. She did care. Of course she cared. But she couldn’t let herself be blackmailed. Where would it end? What would Sonja want from her next year? And the year after? Besides, Sonja was not someone she could trust.

She knew she wouldn’t lose her job over an ancient love affair. Instead, the repercussions would be the whispers, the stares, the way people reevaluated their opinion of her. Nearly twenty years ago, that type of reaction had driven her away. But she wouldn’t let it happen again. She would stay at Boulder. She had to stay to continue her work, and her work was all that mattered. She had thicker skin now than she’d had then. And more to lose by walking away. Let them say what they wanted. Let them laugh at her.

She shuddered involuntarily at the idea of people laughing at her.

She had been sitting for several minutes, immobile, when a shadow at the flap of her tent drew her attention.

“Jordan?” It was Malik.

“Come in,” she said.

He pushed the flap aside and stepped in, a sober expression on his face.

“What is it?” she asked.

He took a few steps closer. “Can we talk about Sonja?”

She sighed. “I don’t feel like…”

“Please.”

She relented, gesturing toward the chair beside her.

“Thank you,” he said, sitting. “I know she has caused you headaches. But she is good at this work and is a valuable asset to our team.”

“I never said she wasn’t. It’s not her work that causes me…headaches.”

“No. She is young and high-spirited. Not always wise. You must have many students who do stupid things.”

“Oh, sure. But I’ve never had one blackmail me before.”

He smiled. “She is not very good at that either, is she?”

“What do you mean?”

“She told us about your love affair, when you were in school. The wife of your professor.”

“Of course she did,” Jordan said with disgust, noting the lingering smile on Malik’s face. Even he was laughing at her.

“We all shrugged and said, so what?”

“You did?”

“Of course. What does it matter? We have all had unwise love affairs. Nobody cares about that.”

Jordan stared, wondering if this could be true.

“If she apologizes,” Malik suggested, “would you let her stay?”

“I would have let her stay before. I overreacted this afternoon. I knew that. But after she tried to blackmail me…”

“She has great admiration for you, Jordan. It hurt her very much that you were angry with her. It made her do something crazy. She seems like she is full of confidence. She is puffed up like a rooster. But she is really not like that underneath. She is scared and unsure of herself. She tries to hide it by being boastful.”

Jordan considered his assessment of Sonja. Perhaps he was right. If so, Sonja seemed more worthy of sympathy. Jordan could even recognize something of herself in that show of bravado.

“If she stays,” she said, “she doesn’t get a guaranteed A. She’ll get whatever grade she earns.”

“Of course.” He smiled. “Thank you! I will tell her.” He stood. “She will be so happy. And you will see, she will cause you no more headaches. I will make sure.” He turned to leave.

“Malik,” she ventured. “Really? Nobody cares about my unwise love affair, as you put it?”

He shook his head, then opened his eyes wide with a thought. “Brian did have something to say about it.”

“Oh?”

“He said, ‘Go, Jordan!’ Then he did the happy dance.”

She laughed impulsively as Malik shimmied in imitation of Brian, the Greenland flag on his head wagging.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Pippa steered the boat into the fjord and pushed up toward Camp Tootega at a moderate pace. Along the way she had considered that this trip would have been more fun with Kelly along, if she were speaking to Kelly.

It hadn’t been easy avoiding Kelly all week. The town was just not that big. But by Wednesday, the calls had quit coming. Kelly must have finally realized Pippa was not going to call her back. Though she had gotten over being mad after just a couple days, she had other reasons for avoiding Kelly. There were things she needed to think about, seriously think about. It wasn’t just about Kelly, although certainly she was the catalyst for all the questions Pippa was asking herself about who she was and what she wanted out of life.