Memory: Volume 3, How Far We Have Come, A Tale of Pride and Prejudice (Memory: A Tale of Pride and Prejudice) (73 page)

“no.”  Elizabeth said softly and kissed her cheek.  “Of course not.” 

“I will put her back.”

“We both will.”  She stood and found her gown, then found his.  Darcy dressed and scooped up the deeply sleeping baby, while Elizabeth walked along beside him in the dark hallway.  “I thought that Rosalie had you completely wrapped around her little finger.” 

He laughed and leaned down to kiss Elizabeth.  “No love, that is you.”

Chapter 23

“W
ait!”  Elizabeth ordered when Rosalie dug her hands into the bowl of feed, scattering it on the ground.  “Slow down, sweetheart.  Now, show me what to do.”  Rosalie looked up to her with wide eyes, then pointed towards the chickens.  “Yes, go ahead!” 

     With an undeniable squeal of joy, Rosalie ran straight into the middle of the flock, scattering them in every direction with clucks of protest while she opened her fist and dropped her present, then ran back for more.  Elizabeth laughed and watched as this time, she threw the feed at the birds, then screamed in fear when she was suddenly surrounded by the feathered bodies.  “Mama!!!” 

Elizabeth waded into the mob and picked up her baby.  “You did such a good job, Rosa!” 

“dood dob” 

“Lizzy?”  Darcy flew around the corner.  “Is she well?”

“She is fine, Will.”  She laughed and walked through the chickens towards him.  “They discovered that she had food.”

He relaxed and caressed her hair.  “Did you feed the chickens, little love?”  Rosalie rested her head on Elizabeth’s shoulder.  

“Mama.”

“Mama rescued you?”  He smiled and kissed her cheek.  “Excellent, Mama.”

“Thank you, kind sir.”  She curtseyed. 

“Is she too heavy?  Shall I . . .” Rosalie wrapped her arms around Elizabeth’s neck. 

“Mama.”

Darcy shrugged.  “She wants you.”

“Well next time she is attacked by chickens, you may come to the rescue.”  Seeing his dejection, Elizabeth sighed over his fragile ego.  “Could you take her?  She really is too heavy for me to hold up this long.”

“Of course.”  He reached for Rosalie.  “Come here, dear.”  Easily he transferred her onto his shoulder and Elizabeth had to turn her face away to stop from laughing at his pleased expression.  When she regained control of her features, she found that Rosalie had commandeered his hat and was modelling it for him.  “A little large, I think.”  He laughed and raised it up above her eyes.  “But most fashionable.”

“I saw some very sweet top hats for ladies at the millinery in town.  For riding habits.” 

“Hmm.”  Darcy looked at her thoughtfully then laughed when Rosalie grabbed the brim and disappeared inside of the hat.  “Where did Rosa go?”  The muffled sound of her voice could be heard and they smiled at each other.  “I shall rescue you before you suffocate, little love.”  He lifted the hat and she helped to put it back on his head.  “There, am I handsome now?”

Rosalie kissed his cheek then wriggling determinedly, demanded to be set down amongst the chickens again.  Reluctantly, he let go and stayed crouched to the ground until he was sure she was fine.  “The teeth must not be bothering her this morning.”

“I felt her gums; the troublesome one seems to have arrived.”  They looked at each other and Darcy rose, taking her hand in his.  “I spoke to Mrs. Robbins.  The best we can determine is that Rosalie climbed up on a chair next to the door and rattled at the latch long enough to get it open.  She knew our room was just across the hall, she had run back and forth between them many times, so . . .”  She sighed.  “At least she knew where she wanted to go and was able to enter.  We moved the chair from the door and Mrs. Robbins will make sure that it is locked before they go to sleep.  She has never tried to escape the nursery at home.”

“Probably because she was at home.”  Darcy smiled when he watched Rosalie scoop a handful of feed and carry it to the chickens, losing most of it on the way. 

“I thought that you were going shooting.”  Elizabeth said quietly.

“No.”  He sighed.  “I needed to work out my thoughts before I told you what I have done.”

“What did you do?”

Darcy led her over to a bench near the chicken coop and looked at her hand.  “Yesterday I spoke to your father and told him that you would never visit Longbourn again so long as your mother lived.”  Elizabeth’s eyes widened and he continued.  “She will never again be welcome in our homes, and she will have no contact with our daughter or any other children we ever have.”  He watched as her hand went to her mouth.  “I told him that we will still attend events where she is present, but that I will take great care to protect you from her.”

“Protect me!”  Elizabeth cried.  “I am perfectly . . .”

“No.”  He shook his head.  “No, love.  You are not.  I have reached the absolute end of my tolerance with a woman who, purposefully or not, reduces you to tears and self-loathing with the slightest comment.  I believe that her dislike for you as a child can never be repaired.  She resents your success even as she feeds from it.  I will not allow you to be hurt and it is my right and my duty to protect you.  My decision is final.  Nothing will change it; do not try to persuade me.”  Darcy watched her lips purse tightly together.  “I realize that you handled her magnificently at Mary’s wedding, but I also saw that you became greatly withdrawn.  An event of such joy was taking place and each time your mother spoke, I saw your body clench.  Your expressions were distant, your smile was . . . Elizabeth, whether you realize it or not, you were protecting yourself just as much as you were attempting to protect Mary and me.” 

“I was?”

“Yes.”  Darcy caressed her hair.  “You are an exceptional woman, a formidable woman, but your mother has the trick of finding the little girl in you, the helpless child who could not fight back, other than to grow old enough so that you could run away.”

“She hated my walks.”  Elizabeth whispered.  “She said I was wild, but then she would say how glad she was that I was not underfoot.”  She looked at him.  “I never knew what to do to make her happy.”

“You no longer need to try.”  He pulled her close and hugged her.  “Your father on his own told her that she may not come to Netherfield without an invitation.”

“Oh.”

“I have spoken to Bingley, the Bennets are his neighbours and I will not dictate his guests, but he is aware of our concerns.  Kitty is welcome at any time, of course, as is your father.”

“What will Jane say?”  Elizabeth wondered as she tried to digest this turn of events.

“I realize that it places her in a difficult position.”

Elizabeth snapped.  “Difficult!  She will be living in the dower house on Longbourn!  Oh, I can hear Mama in her ear now, complaining of me!”

“It will be Jane’s decision how she chooses to address this.  And ultimately Robert’s decision to take any further action in regards to his family.”  Darcy shrugged when she turned to stare at him incredulously.  “Jane never experienced what you have.  Yes, she suffered for listening to your mother, but it was praise, it was ridiculous goals, but ultimately it was Jane’s interpretation of your mother’s zealous adoration and expectations for her first child that created what she sadly became.”

“You still resent her!”  Elizabeth cried.  “What is the difference between her . . .
interpretation
of Mama and your interpretation of your father’s edicts?”

His brow creased when he felt the sting of her anger.  “What do you mean?” 

“Your blind adherence to what you thought was correct drove you from me.”

“And I found my way back as soon as I knew that I had misinterpreted his desires.”  Darcy’s voice became gruff.  “I never, even in my darkest moments of despair for our separation, thought less of you for whom you were, or stopped thinking of how much I wanted you.  Never.”  His eyes grew bright.  “I never spoke ill of you, I always defended you, even when you were but a conjecture on the tongue of my suspicious cousins.  My father was an enormous influence, yes, but it was never . . .”  He pulled himself together and tried to calm, and standing, walked to the corner of the chicken coop and leaned on it.  “I never stopped loving you, Elizabeth, even when I thought I was serving my family by letting you go.”  The silence between them was painful, and they both concentrated on Rosalie.

“Jane did think less of me when she gave in to Mama’s teachings.  I suppose that I have chosen to forget how hurt I was then.”  Elizabeth said softly to his back.  “Do you hate her?”

“No.”  He sighed.  “No, I like her now; I care for her, why would I be working so hard to make her a comfortable home while dancing around her husband’s pride if I did not?  She has changed for the better, and loving Lucas is why.  But unlike you, I do not forget offenses easily, especially if they hurt the woman I love more than my life.  She hurt you, she insulted me, and it was all caused by your mother.  She is the root of so much unhappiness.  Imagine your sisters and how much worse they would be had they not been removed from her influence when they were?  Look at Lydia, what did her letter say?  She now shares a room with a girl so much like she once was that she is ill thinking of the misery she inflicted on her sisters.”  He turned and tried to look into her eyes.  “Catherine was the most unaffected of your sisters, I think, not forgotten, not abused, just left to imitate.  I leave it to her and your father to decide if she truly should remain.”  Walking back he stood in front of her, his hand hanging by his side, and he willed her to take it.  “I am sorry, Elizabeth.  I do not mean to bring undue hardship on your sister, but . . . I care for your well-being above all others.  You and Rosalie are my sole responsibility, and I take it very seriously.  I wrote to Peter this morning about my decision and included my note with Bingley’s invitation.”

“He will likely join you in this act.”  Elizabeth whispered to herself.  “Mama has never been a friend to Mary.”

“No.”  Darcy sank down beside her and they sat silently, watching Rosalie chasing the birds. 

“I wish that you had spoken with me first.  You always have in the past.”

“What good would that have done? Would you have pled her cause?”

“We so rarely see her; I could bear her for the few hours . . .”

“No.” 

“So talking to you would have been a worthless exercise?”

“No, dearest.  I said no to your continued belief that you can walk into that particular house and remain the woman you are before the carriage rolls in the gate.  You cannot enter that home.  Yes, you can bear her anywhere else, which is why I did not say we would never see her again.  Never in Longbourn, never in our homes.  And no unannounced calls.  That is all I have said.”

“And no Rosa.”  They watched her run up to them with the empty bowl and a brilliant smile. 

“She runs from her now.”  Darcy picked her up and placed her on his knee.  “She knows.”

Elizabeth tied the ribbon that had come loose on her shoe and fixed her bonnet.  “She does.”  She looked up to see his sad eyes.  “I know that you could have made this decision long ago, Will.  I know that you allowed her every chance in the world.  I know.”

“We can gather at Rosings or Darcy House to see your sisters, we do not have to come to Longbourn.  Both are easier distances for everyone than Pemberley.”

“What of Mr. Bingley?”  She looked around and back to the manor house.  

“He wants to live in Derbyshire, remember?”  Darcy said softly and leaned towards her.  “Lizzy, please . . .”

“I understand, Will.”  Elizabeth touched his cheek and finally kissed him.  “And you are correct; I could not have done this.”

“Mama?”  Rosalie sat up and held open her arms.  Elizabeth smiled and hugged her, taking her from Darcy’s lap to hers. 

“Thank you, sweetie.”  She kissed her and looked up to Darcy from over her head.  “And thank you, too.” 

“I WONDERED IF A BREAK would come.”  Jane said quietly after Lucas told her of Darcy’s decision.  “It seemed destined to happen.  Actually, I was expecting it to happen with me.”  She spoke softly and he put his arm around her shoulders.  “He is extraordinarily good.”

“You say that in the same breath where you imagine him cutting ties with you?”  Lucas smiled.  “Explain yourself.”

Jane sighed.  “You once told me that you knew I was my mother’s daughter and that I had the potential to be as outspoken as she, and I was surprised.”

“Yes, and I said that I looked forward to knowing that side of you.  That was when you told me how you became jealous of Elizabeth and Darcy’s love and behaved so horribly.”  He nodded, “Ah yes, and that is why you expected him to reject you, but he did not, so he is good.”  He chuckled at her reasoning.  “He said that Elizabeth worried for the repercussions you will face, your mother will undoubtedly fill your ear with her affront.”

“That is nothing new, and nothing I cannot manage.”  Jane tilted her head when he laughed.  “What is so amusing?”

“You dear, ever since we stood up to our parents and told them to stay out of our marriage, I have noticed that you are far less easily provoked by your mother, and more than that, less willing to allow her to declare ridiculous pronouncements about all and sundry.” 

“I am?”  Jane stood tall and smiled.  “I did not realize that.”

“I told you that I wanted to meet the Jane that you keep hidden away when you try to please everyone but yourself.  She has arrived, don’t you know?”  Lucas hugged her to him and patted the growing baby.  “I have not the slightest fear of you taking on your mother, whatever her reaction.  Elizabeth worries for the old Jane who tried to see goodness in everything; I have confidence in the woman in my arms.  You have changed, my dear, you are now capable of seeing the darker side of people.  I think that is a good thing.”  Looking down he kissed her.  “Shall I drive you to Longbourn in our ridiculous new curricle?”

“Why did you buy a curricle?”  Jane laughed as they walked hand in hand to the fancy yellow rig.  “This is a young unmarried man’s toy.”