Mercy's Angels Box Set (76 page)

“I hear you taught Eli how to punch someone in that region,” I murmured as I dumped my things on the kitchen counter.

“Self-defense: eight-year-old style,” he said easily. To be honest I didn’t have a problem with Dillon teaching Eli how to punch someone in the nuts, as Eli put it. I wanted my boy to be able to defend himself.

“The teacher said it would be fine. It’s the best plausible line of defense for a child; they’re not tall enough to aim for the face, and a good, hard jab to the groin is the quickest way to escape an attacker.”

I waved off his defensive tone. “I’m actually grateful, Dillon. Do you think you could show Eli some more things? I mean, I don’t want to encourage him to be the playground wrestling champion, but I want him to know how to defend himself.” As I began flicking through the mail, I quickly realized the silence that had fallen around me. When I glanced up, I noticed Eli playing on his Xbox in the living room and Dillon watching me, a curious, unreadable expression on his face.

“What bought this on?” he asked.

I shuffled my feet nervously under his intense gaze. It didn’t frighten me; Dillon was one of only a small handful of men that actually made me feel safe. He always moved slow and deliberate around me, as if he were worried a fast movement might actually frighten me. To begin with, it would have, and being alone in a room with a man would have sent me into a panic attack. Now though, I was doing much better. The scars and fear were still there, but the panic had receded to a manageable and muted level.

“I just want him to be able to protect himself. I guess this is the job a father would do, teach their son how to handle those kind of situations. He doesn’t have the luxury of asking his dad how to do . . . manly things.” I struggled for words. “If you don’t feel comfortable, that’s fine. I’ll ask—”

“I’ll show him,” Dillon cut me off. “But he’s safe here, Annie. No one is going to hurt him or you.” I held his gaze for a moment longer before it erred on the side of awkward. Dillon was far too observant for his own good. “Maybe I could show you a few things, too,” he suggested.

“I took a few of Charlie’s self-defense classes, so I’m good.” To be honest, Charlie’s classes scared the daylights out of me. Even though they were conducted at Mercy’s Shelter surrounded by women, and Charlie was one of those handful of men I trusted, I found myself recoiling at the sound of fists hitting a punching bag. It sounded far too close to the sound of a fist hitting flesh.

“That was some time ago, though, and it doesn’t hurt to keep on top of it. Your safety is just as important as Eli’s,” Dillon went on.

“Fine, next week maybe,” I mumbled, knowing he wouldn’t back down until I conceded. He smiled, and I found myself having to look away for another reason. The heat from that playful grin twisted its way through my body until it settled in a feminine region I had long ago put on a shelf. Concentrating on the unforgiving bills in my hands, my body stilled when I reached a letter whose postal stamp had a familiar zip code. When I flipped it over and saw the return address for the Law Offices of Clark, Lane, and Johnson, my stomach flipped.

“Annie, everything alright?” Dillon asked.

I dropped the remaining mail and quickly checked to make sure Eli was still obsessively glued to his Xbox. Taking the letter to the privacy of my bedroom, I sat on the side of the bed and ripped it open.

“What is it?” Dillon asked, having followed me.

The letter inside was formally typed and addressed to Mrs. Annie Lonergan.

Dear Mrs Annie Longergan,

We have been instructed by Mr. Phillip Lonergan to write to you in regards to him seeking access to his son, Eli Lonergan, in the form of supervised visits.

The rest of the letter was a blur, and the dread in my veins no doubt bleached the color from my face. My eyes welled with unshed tears, fury burning low and deep in my stomach. Phillip, the man who had threatened to coat the walls of our home with my blood, wanted the opportunity to bond with his son. The only way such a thing would ever happen would be over my dead body.

Annie was pale and her hands shook so badly I wondered how in the hell she managed to read the damn letter she had clutched in her hands.

“Phillip wants to see Eli,” she finally whispered.

Kneeling down before her, I carefully lifted the letter from her hands and read. It wasn’t a personal letter from the man himself, but a legal document from a lawyer who specialized in family law. Civilities be damned, Phillip had gone straight to the top and lawyered up. It didn’t surprise me, though; he was a father who wanted to see his son. What he had done to Annie was unforgivable; Jax had told me the condition she turned up on Mercy’s door step in. Phillip had an illness, though, and while I longed to hate the man for hurting Annie and curse him to hell and back, the thing was, he was a sick man. Perhaps, under normal circumstances, he would have been a man who would never have hurt his wife. We would never know. What we did know was that medicated, Phillip had proven himself to be a man who could control the rage that burned within. Too bad he couldn’t stick to his meds.

“Let me make some calls,” I mumbled, taking my phone from my back pocket. I called my lawyer, Trevor Billings, whose speciality was not family law, but he’d still know how to proceed. While I talked to Trevor, I watched Annie from the corner of my eye. She was now sitting on the sofa beside Eli, watching him so intently, I wondered if she thought he’d disappear if she looked away.

It has been over two years since she had left Phillip, and she still carried the classic symptoms of a woman hurt by a man. The underlying fear in her eyes never left; she was constantly looking over her shoulder, even if she didn’t realize it herself. She jumped at loud noises and cringed at raised voices. She masked her symptoms behind a wall of independence, and I admired the shit out of her for it. Against all odds, Annie had turned her life around. She had fled the tyranny of a man who couldn’t control his illness and had walked into Mercy’s Shelter with no more than the clothes on her back, beaten, and scared. She had picked herself up, dusted herself off, and made a life for herself and Eli in Claymont. Even after Phillip found her here, and in a fit of rage, threatened Annie’s friend from the shelter, little Ella Munroe, she had continued to allow herself and Eli to flourish in the small town safely cushioned in the dark mountain range.

I finished up my conversation with Trevor and promised to fax a copy of the letter to him tonight.

“Annie,” I murmured to get her attention. She didn’t hear me, so lost in her own thoughts she barely blinked, her steady gaze on Eli the entire time. “Annie!” I said a little more sternly, and her eyes flew to mine, but so did Eli’s. Like any eight-year-old though, he quickly resumed the game that demanded his complete, undivided attention. I gave my head a small flick, indicating Annie to join me in the kitchen. She reluctantly stood and followed me away from Eli. “I have someone looking into it, but worst case scenario, Eli will have to do a supervised visit.”

Her jaw locked defiantly and anger flared in her eyes. She was so damn beautiful standing so proud and strong. I wanted to reach out, cup her cheeks in my hands, and kiss her senseless. I settled on brushing the backs of my fingers down the soft skin of her cheek. I liked the surprised look on her face and the flare of unconcealed desire in her eyes as my hand reluctantly fell away.

“He wouldn’t be left alone with him, not even for a second. My lawyer even thinks he might be able to organize the visit in such a way that I’m present for the entire thing.”

“What if Eli doesn’t want to see him?” Annie whispered.

“He might not have a choice, so it will be up to us to prepare him as best as we can.” She was nibbling on her lower lip. The tired bruises under her eyes didn’t detract from her beauty, the vulnerability only made her all the more alluring to me. “Come on, sunshine,” I murmured. Her cheeks heated at my nickname for her. I don’t remember when I started calling her that to her face; it just began, and it had stuck. It was a name saved for just us; I never used it in front of others and not because I was embarrassed by it, but by the blush it still drew from her cheeks, it embarrassed her. She was my sunshine, though; the world felt better when I was around her, it felt warmer, and I felt content. “Let my lawyer do his thing, and we’ll worry about it when we have to.”

My phone began vibrating on the counter beside us, Melinda’s name flashing across the screen. Annie quickly diverted her gaze, but not before I caught an irritated sigh escaping her lips. Interesting. A few months ago, when I had finally bitten the bullet and asked Annie out on an official date, she turned me down with no rhyme or reason. I assumed it was a combination of fear and the thought that just maybe she didn’t care for me the way I cared for her, that she saw me as nothing more than a friend and I had crossed that line in spectacular fashion. But now, seeing her response to my casual touch and the subsequent phone call from Melinda, I was thinking maybe her choice not to pursue a relationship with me was born solely out of fear. That I could work with. I adored Annie; from the first moment I had laid eyes on her, I found myself compelled to protect her. That delicate body hidden under unassuming clothes could hold my attention better than any damn Hustler. Her beauty was understated and humble, which only magnified my attraction to her. Her caring nature was amplified in her son, Eli, a boy who could win any heart in five seconds flat. He had won mine in less. I spent twelve months earning Annie’s trust and developing a friendship with her and her son, in the hope that one day I’d have more. She was simply stunning, her eyes always so vivid and full of emotion. She was shy and cautious around people which only made her all the more endearing. When I had finally found the courage to ask her out, she had promptly turned me down, and in response, I scrolled through the contacts in my cell phone until I came to Melinda’s name.  She had been looking to upgrade the security at her real estate office and had also made it clear she was interested in me. Dating Melinda had initially been motivated by anger and an attempt to garner some sort of jealousy out of Annie. Annie seemed oblivious to my relationship with Melinda, so with that major backfire, I actually took the time to get to know Melinda. She was an intelligent, beautiful woman with the cliché blonde hair and blue eyes. She always dressed to perfection, her makeup always flawless. Funny thing was, as right as she looked beside me, it felt completely wrong.

“Hey, Melinda, how’s it going?” I answered her call.

“Hi, my handsome soldier,” Melinda crooned, and I cringed. I hated the affectionate term she had decided to label me with. Being a soldier had been an important part of crafting the man I was today. I had seen so much death and despair when I served abroad that I couldn’t begin to fathom how someone could take something so serious and turn it into something so . . . sappy. “Are we still on for dinner?”

I cringed again. Damn, I’d forgotten we were having dinner tonight. “Ahh, I’m going to have to take a rain check. I’ve got to go into the office for a bit,” I said. I wasn’t lying. I did, in fact, have to go into the office and email this letter to Trevor. I also had a stack of paperwork a mile high turning my desk into the Great Wall of Claymont.

“Maybe I could bring dinner to you. You have to eat sometime.”

“Samuel will be thereand will  have something cooked up. How about we do lunch tomorrow?” I watched Annie as she tried hard to look as if she weren’t listening. It was adorable. Melinda sighed, and I could almost imagine her pouting. I hated women who pouted. Annie never pouted. When she didn’t get her way, she clenched her jaw and stood a little taller, staring down the poor, wretched soul who dared to deny her.

“Fine, lunch tomorrow.” Melinda sighed. “I don’t suppose we can have a private lunch, maybe my place?”

I wouldn’t be a male if I were to say the offer didn’t intrigue me. The difference between me and other men, though, was when my heart belonged to another, there was no way I could rent my body out to someone else. Perhaps I had a weird fetish for punishing my heart, or perhaps I was just plain old stubborn, but I wanted to try things with Annie again. She truly warmed a place in my heart that no other did, and if there were a chance I could convince her to have a little trust in us, I wanted to take it. First things first, though; I needed to break things off with Melinda. Dating her while secretly wishing she were someone else wasn’t cool. I wasn’t that guy, and it wasn’t fair to Melinda.

“Actually, I need to talk to you about something. Can I swing by your place on the way to the office tonight?”

“Of course you can, handsome soldier. I’ll be waiting.” It was clearly evident by the enthusiasm in her voice that she was expecting a booty call, not a break-up visit.

“See you soon.” I hung up and Annie went about pulling things from the fridge as if she didn’t even realize I was in the room. Cute.

“Annie, I need to get going, but I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Annie turned and feigned surprise. “Oh, okay, no problem,” she said with a big smile. On closer inspection, though, I realized the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. I’d seen this smile so many times in the past, but I had never realized how much she was forcing it.  For a man who spent his life examining things from every single angle, planning missions, analyzing data, I was clearly lacking when it came to women. Knowing I wouldn’t be able to drag Eli away from the game that had him enthralled, I strolled the few feet into the living room and ruffled his hair. With a quick glance over his shoulder, he smiled.

“You’re the man of the house, Eli. Remember to look after your momma,” I murmured.

“Don’t worry. I’ll look after her.” He smiled, returning his attention to his game.

He was a good kid, smart and honest. I had nieces and nephews who I adored and spoiled rotten, but Eli was different. He wasn’t mine, yet I couldn’t imagine not having him in my life. He was like a missing piece to a puzzle that just fit and made my life whole. My dark memories retreated under Eli’s innocence, he made me want to be a better person, and he forced my protective instincts into overdrive. I wanted to make this world safe for him and pave the way for his bright future. No, he wasn’t mine biologically, but I couldn’t help but think of him as mine, much the same way I couldn’t help wish that his mom were mine, too.

“I’ll call you tomorrow,” I promised Annie.

“Dillon?” I paused at the sound of her hesitant voice. With my hand on the door knob, I glanced over my shoulder. “Thank you.” She looked so tired and unguarded in that moment with a dish towel clenched in her fists, those expressive eyes full of fear.

“It will be alright, Annie, I promise.” I wasn’t sure I could deliver that kind of promise, but if she had asked me for the stars in that moment, I would have found a way to lay them at her feet. Shoving aside any weakness or vulnerability, she gave me a sure nod before turning her attention back to preparing dinner.

***

Breaking up with Melinda had been harder than I had anticipated. She had cried, and I was a man who found himself ripped to shreds at the sight of a woman in tears. I didn’t want to hurt Melinda, but I didn’t love her. If I had continued living the lie, she would have quite possibly been hurt worse in the end. In a moment of weakness, I had gently wiped away the tears from her cheeks and allowed myself to become captured in her desperate kiss before gently pushing her away. I had never felt like more of a bastard. Driving away from her apartment, I swore if Annie didn’t accept me this time, I would join a damn monastery. I was not putting myself or another woman through that kind of emotional torture again. My dick could damn well protest all it wanted, but my heart was too raw for this kind of shit.

I glanced up at the broad chested frame of my best friend, Jaxon Carter. His boots were resting on the edge of my desk, his chair tilting dangerously on its two back legs. His brow was furrowed in concentration as he read the book sitting in his lap. He looked so different to the soldier I had met in Afghanistan. That man had been clean shaven, his hair military cropped short, his uniform crisp and wrinkle free, his boots shined to a painfully pristine luster. He was a fine soldier, the only man I ever felt truly comfortable having at my back. Now days, Jax sported a face of scruff, wild and untamed hair, a wrinkled t-shirt, and boots that were worn and scuffed, the laces frayed, and he looked the better for it. More relaxed and at ease than I had ever known him to be.

“What are you reading?” I wondered as I signed off another security upgrade quote and shoved it into the pile for my secretary, Alice, to deal with in the morning. Jax raised the book so I could see the cover, his eyes not leaving the pages before him.

“What To Expect When You’re Expecting. You’re reading birthing books in my office?” I choked out.

Jax glanced over the top of the book and raised a brow. “Ella’s at Rebecca’s; they’re baking a cake for Charlie’s birthday. It’s too noisy over there and I can’t concentrate.” His eyes moved back to the book.

“Ella’s cooking?” I wondered out loud.

“No, Rebecca promised me she wouldn’t let her do more than stir the batter.”

I smiled at the thought. Ella had been taking cooking classes with Mary, the resident cook at Mercy’s Shelter for Abused Women. Unfortunately, the classes were not helping, but the defiant little pocket rocket refused to be defeated and cooked often, much to the detriment of her friends who were forced to endure her failed attempts.

“How is it you haven’t wasted away to nothing?”