Metamorphosis (23 page)

“Scarlett…” his voice faded off
and he looked away. “I just can’t. Not now, it’s not right for you.”

“Don’t I get to decide what’s
right for me?” I was almost whining at this point, but damn it, what was the
problem? “What’s really going on, Dylan? I swear, sometimes I don’t understand
you at all. You know I really don’t want to have this conversation out here.
Can we at least go inside to talk without an audience?”

He looked down at his phone and
then
back
up at me. “I can’t, I’m really sorry,
Scarlett.”

“What? Do you have another date
tonight or something? Why are you acting so damn weird all of a sudden?” I
tried hard not to raise my voice, but the hurt from the rejection of my
invitation and the confusion about why the hell he was checking his phone at
the end of our date won out. “You know what, just go. Whatever. Wow. What an
awful way to end what was the perfect first date; I sure won’t forget it now.”
I spun on my heel to open my door, vowing not to let him see my cry.

“Scarlett, wait…” he said as he
reached for my shoulder. I shrugged out of his grasp as the door unlocked and
opened. I turned and looked in his dark sapphire eyes. “Dylan, up until ten
minutes ago, I had an amazing evening, thank you so much for dinner and the
ballet. However, until you are ready to tell me why it is we only see each
other on Saturdays, why every time things start to heat up between us you stop
it, and why you are acting like you are running late for something while
dropping me off after a date, which by the way is incredibly rude - I’m sorry I
kept you for so long from whatever else or whomever else it is you need to
attend to, I don’t really think we have much to talk about.” I turned from him,
walked into my dorm, and allowed the door to close in his face. It was then
that I allowed the tears to flow freely.
Stupid nice boys.

After a scalding hot shower, I
changed into my usual
cami
and panties sleeping
ensemble and went to the kitchenette in search of alcohol. My mind was consumed
with thoughts of Dylan and I couldn’t stop thinking about how things had gone
from so great to so bad in a matter of minutes. Every so often, an image of Ash
or Mason would float by, only adding to my confusion. Did I really have any
right to get angry
at
Dylan for hiding things when I
wasn’t exactly forthcoming about what I had done just the night before? I hoped
we had some wine or something that would help me calm down and get some sleep.
The chime of my phone indicating I had a text message rang out just as located
a bottle of wine in the fridge. I quickly poured a glass and then hurried into
my room, hopeful that it was Dylan wanting to apologize. It wasn’t.

Ash (12:42 am): Where are you? Why aren’t you at Jacob’s?

I had forgotten to text him to let
him know I wasn’t going to be there. I responded quickly so he wouldn’t think something
had happened to me.

Me (12:45 am): I’m at home. Sorry, forgot to tell you I wasn’t coming.

Ash (12:46 am): Dylan?

Me (12:46 am): We went out on a date tonight. He just dropped me off.

Ash (12:47am):
Evie
?

Me (12:47 am): Out with Max

Ash (12:51 am): So you’re alone?

Me (12:52 am): Yep, getting ready for bed

Ash (12:55 am): I’m not going to be able to sleep without you tonight.

Me (12:56 am): You sleep the other 6 nights a week without me. You’ll
be fine

I didn’t hear back from him after
that last text, and I wasn’t sure if I had pissed him off, but I really
couldn’t worry my poor brain with another issue at that time, I was already
stressed over everything that had happened with Dylan. I would smooth
everything over the following day. I downed the glass of wine and went to the
kitchen to pour a second. Just as I was returning the bottle to the fridge,
someone knocked on the door. The sound startled me and I wondered who in the
world could possibly be at my door at 1:00 in the morning that wouldn’t have
called before showing up. I hurried to the door, opening it only far enough
that I could see who it was, and making sure my non-dressed body was hidden
behind it.

Ash stood on our doormat looking
as incredible as always. True to his surfer boy image, his long sandy hair was
messy and he had on a white Billabong long sleeved tee with holey, faded jeans
and
flip flops
. He smiled brightly at me when I
cracked the door and the dimples were activated. I stopped breathing
momentarily as the sight of him mixed with his masculine scent flooded my
senses. I didn’t say anything, waiting for him to explain his sudden
appearance.

“I get my best night’s sleep when
you stay with me, and I can’t wait for next Saturday to get fully rested, so
here I am. We can stay here if you want or I can take you back to my house.
Either way, I just need you to be sleeping next to me.” Ash said
matter-of-factly.

I opened the door wide enough so
that he could come in, and once he did, the first thing he did was look down at
my body. “I’ll go put some other clothes on; come in and make yourself at
home,” I said.

I had no idea what to think about
Ash showing up at my door, but one thing was for sure - this was by far the
strangest night of my life. I was exhausted and told Ash as much. I apologized
for not being much company, but he wouldn’t hear of it. Not fifteen minutes
after he had knocked on my door, we were lying in my bed, our bodies fit
together like a puzzle, John Coltrane playing softly in the background. Sleep
took over quickly.

I woke up several hours later at
the sound of the front door closing. I looked at my alarm clock - it read
3:30AM.
Evie
was home. Weird. I hoped everything was
okay with her and Max. Then I heard their voices and realized that Max was with
her. I tried to go back to sleep, but my thoughts couldn’t help but drift back
to the happenings of the last couple of days. I had gone from making out with
and giving a blowjob to Mason on Friday night, to kissing Ash later that same
night, to spending Saturday afternoon and evening on a date and making out with
Dylan, to spending the night with Ash in my bed Saturday night. In 36 hours I
had gone from little-miss-goodie-two-shoes to a dirty whore. Okay, maybe not
quite a dirty whore, considering my hymen was still firmly intact, but having
three different guys’ tongues (and other body parts) in my mouth in that short
amount of time was definitely good practice in becoming one. But instead of
crawling out of my bed and working to maintain some dignity by moving to the couch,
I curled up into Ash’s body and felt overall bliss from head to toe as he
wrapped his arms around my waist and held me close to his body. He kissed the
top of my head and whispered, “Get some sleep, butterfly, it’s still early.
Stop over thinking everything.” And I did my best as I drifted off again.

Sometime later I awoke to a male
voice whispering my name in my ear. “Scarlett, Scarlett, wake up.” My eyes shot
open. Ash was leaning over me, fully dressed. What was he doing in my room? The
events from the previous day rushed through my mind and I remembered his early
morning arrival. I closed my eyes and groaned. “What time is it?”

“It’s almost ten. I’ve got to get
home and finish a paper or I’d take you to breakfast.” His face was still mere
inches from mine and I wondered how his breath could be so sweet after just
waking up. “I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

“Kay. I’m going back to sleep.
Bye,” I murmured.

He chuckled and reached down to
kiss my forehead. A few moments later I heard my bedroom door open and close,
followed by voices in the living area and the closing of the main door.
Uggghh
. I had hoped that he could’ve left without
Evie
seeing him, but no such luck. I buried my head in my
pillow and waited for her.

Evie
did not disappoint. Less than a
minute later, my door swung open and I felt her climb in bed with me. She
didn’t beat around the bush. “Dare I ask why when I last saw you, you were
leaving here on a date with Dylan and then this morning as I’m getting some
water, I see Ash leaving your bedroom looking like he just woke up?”

“I plead the fifth,” I mumbled,
still hiding under my pillow protection.

“I hope you know what you are
doing, Scarlett. Contrary to the ninety nine percent of the books that you read
and movies you watch, in reality, things don’t always turn out all wrapped up
with a perfectly tied bow. I know we like to joke around about it and draw
parallels of our lives with these fictional characters, but this is real life,
Sam, and I’m really worried about you getting hurt.” Her concern was evident in
her voice. “You want to tell me what happened?”

I pulled my head out and
proceeded
to tell her about how wonderful the date was but
how Dylan started acting all weird, and then how I had forgotten to let Ash
know that I wasn’t going to Jacob’s so he got worried… again.

“He was so worried he had to come
check on you here?” She lifted her eyebrows in disbelief. “You expect me to
believe that y’all are still just friends after everything I’ve seen in the
last two days?”

“Nothing happened,
Evie
. I swear. We just slept, he didn’t even get here until
after one,” I tried to explain.

She was quiet for a minute and
then said, “Look, like I told you yesterday and the day before that, do what
you feel is right for you. I’ll be here to support you no matter what. I was
just surprised to see him.”

I nodded, knowing that she wished
I would stay as far away from Ash as possible. She was well aware of my
weakness and vulnerability when it came to him, as was I. Remembering her
coming home in the middle of the night, I asked, “Hey, why did you come home at
like 3:00 this morning, and was Max with you? I thought y’all were staying at
his place.”

“I got a headache and I didn’t
have any medicine on me, so Max and I decided to just stay the night here. He’s
still asleep in my bed”

“A headache?” I blurted out. “I
thought you had stopped getting them since you got the glasses?”

“Dude, chill out,”
Evie
waved her hand like it was no big deal. “It wasn’t too
bad, I think I got it because I didn’t have any caffeine yesterday. You know,
like withdrawals or something.”

“Please promise that you will tell
me if you start getting them again like before,” I pleaded with her. There was
something strange about her getting all of these headaches in the last few
months when I could count on one hand the number she had endured in her
lifetime previously.

“I will, I will. Jeez, Scarlett.
And don’t try to change the subject to focus on me. I believe we were
discussing you and your slew of gorgeous guys…”

“There is no ‘slew.’” I
interrupted. “And I’m really tired of thinking and talking about them and what
it all means all the time.” I had developed a headache myself trying to analyze
and scrutinize my relationship with each of the guys that had recently entered
my life. I obviously felt something for each of them, but I wasn’t sure exactly
what that something was. “So beginning right now, I’m imposing a boy-free
Sunday. Let’s do a bunch of girly things together like we used to. You in?”

Evie
looked over at her closed bedroom
door and then back at me. A slow grin crept across her face, “That sounds
awesome, but first I’ve got to get rid of Max.”

“Oh, that’s okay
Evie
. I forgot he was here. If you were planning on hanging
out with Max today, we can do it another time.” I tried hard to not allow my
disappointment show in my voice, but it was impossible.

“No, I was actually thinking we
needed to do a movie marathon with our favorite vampires and werewolves before
the last movie comes out next Thursday night. You up for four movies today?”
She asked already knowing what my answer would be.

“I need to change into my Team
Edward t-shirt.” My face lit up at just the thought.

“Okay, give me an hour and I’ll
meet you on the couch,” she said, already walking towards her room.

Evie
and I spent the rest of that
Sunday just as we had planned, on our couch stuffing our faces with popcorn and
candy as if we were at an actual theater. I welcomed the refuge from my
thoughts about my own life that were getting more and more complicated.

Later that evening, my mom called
inquiring about my plans for Thanksgiving. I wondered aloud if she was serious,
where else was I going to go? She then proceeded to tell me how I wasn’t the
daughter that she raised, how she couldn’t believe that I could be so rude and
unappreciative to the people who sacrificed everything for me… that was about
the point I tuned her out. I wasn’t in the mood to really get into it with her
so I just let her rant, and when she finished, I just said, “Okay, mom, you’re
right. I’ll be there the day before and leave the day after. I
gotta
go study, see you then,” and hung up. I wasn’t sure
how I was going to make it
forty two
hours in her
house. Yes, I had counted the hours. As far as I was concerned, it was going to
be as close to torture than anything I had ever faced. I was depending heavily
on my grandparents and my brother and his family to act as a buffer while I was
there. I figured if things got too bad, I could always retreat to
Evie’s
house. For the first time since I had stood up to my
parents, I began to
second guess
my actions. When I
had envisioned the whole confrontation, there was much less yelling and much
more understanding on their part. But since that wasn’t the way it happened, I
was faced with these awkward family moments that I had never considered before.