Michael (23 page)

“But I—”

“Don’t worry,” she said, “I’ll get us some cute stuff. What, you don’t think I know style when I see it?” She pointed to her blue mane.

I’m not worried about style,
I didn’t say,
I’m worried you’re finding all kinds of excuses for seducing Michael behind my back.
“Whoa…” I was dizzy with the cascade of unexpected thoughts in my head.

“I know, I know. Good luck finding anything in this little country town, I know.” She held up her phone. “I’ve got all kinds of fun toys to help me.”

“Great,” I said. “Gas-station clothes. Awesome.”

“Aw, chin up. After bathing you’ll feel properly sorted.” She punched me in the arm playfully. “Promise.”

Owwww! So much emotional pain!
I wanted to die in the avalanche of it.

Michael felt exactly like a kid in over his head. He had poked the dog with the stick one too many times, and now the fence had broken and he was on the run, eager fangs giving chase and closing in. It was too much. He felt very heavy. Exhausted and worthless. He was waiting for some strong hand to rescue him—though his only experiences with strength had been commingled with unspeakable abuse.

Stanley had been…unkind.

He had enough faith to wrestle the doubt that kept throwing little pebbles at his resolve, pecking away at the belief that he had what it took to make it through this latest wrinkle, this latest setback, this absolutely insane upping of the ante.

“How could she?” he choked out, the tears coming. He was glad to be alone, he decided.
This is right.
It fit, though it made no sense and he had no idea how he was going to summon the strength to continue on. Though it was right, though it was…justice, he supposed, it still made no sense.

It was surreal. It was like he was watching a copy of himself when it had happened. He stood off, frozen in shock, and watched his body do things.

It had happened in the little park. Airel and Kim were being charmingly immature, roaring about eating rhinoceros or something, and then she tackled her and they wrestled and rolled around on the grass.

How could she?!

Airel and Kim rolled away, leaving it quite literally at his feet: the Bloodstone.

My God!
“She’s been carrying it this whole time…” his mind flew backward through all the places they had been, all the things they had done, all the plans they’d made, and all this time, the Bloodstone had its carrier. “Kim…how could you?”

She’s a traitor…

No one had seen him pick it up. He had covered it with his shoe;
that’s where the wretched thing belongs, under my feet;
and when Ellie took the cash to go get the rooms, he had bent and…and took it.

He cursed his awful father, cursed his memory, cursed the day of his own birth into this insanity. The
why
filled his head. El…
why? Can El be any good at all when His creation is so…so evil?
“Why do I have to be the one to carry this burden?”

He felt absolutely alone.

What will it do to me?

Michael felt pulled in two directions as the perpetually unhealing wound in his chest throbbed stronger.

CHAPTER XV

Boise, Idaho, present day

THE WHITE FBI AS-350 helicopter climbed quickly, accelerating to its cruise speed of 130 knots—about 150 miles per hour. At that rate, Reid would cover the roughly 300 miles to the scene of the incident in less than two hours.

Harry sat there, his nose buried in his Kindle eReader.

She wondered what he could be reading that was more interesting than real life. It irritated her. He was probably reading something hideously nerdy. She snatched the gadget out of his hand and glanced at the display. Seniority had its privileges, its prerogatives. On the “ePage,” or whatever you called it, was something by some idiot Frenchman named Beaudelaire; something about
The
Flowers of Evil
or some such rot. She snickered and handed the absurd device and its absurd content back to him with a sneer. He meekly took it without the slightest sign of protest, which made her despise him even more.
There are so few killers in the world,
she surmised.
Most people are just ignorant sheep.

She was drawn back to the present situation, to what really mattered. It was such an incredible career opportunity, she realized. She could ride in on her white stallion and claim to be concerned for Tom Rawlins, to offer to take up the loose threads of his investigation, all in the name of
esprit de corps,
for the FBI, for the team. Meanwhile, no one had to know that her real motivation was to look good to the bosses, be on her game, be the go-to gal, get things done in spite of her (slightly) evident grief for her (most likely) fallen comrade-in-arms. She had developed a feel for these things. Her gut was telling her that Rawlins was dead and that opportunity therefore awaited, yawning supinely before her.

Hey,
she thought,
life’s a contest and to the conqueror go the spoils.
And she could be a ruthless gangster when she needed to be. When it suited her. She reflected, a little egomaniacally, on herself:
What was your best moment, your favorite promotion, Gretchen? The next one,
she answered herself.

The helo slipped swiftly through the airstream.

Arlington, Oregon, present day

Kim had showered and then collapsed into the bed quickly thereafter, falling into a deep but troubled sleep. She was comfortable now, lying there with the feel of clean sheets on her skin, her body heat reflected back to her, warming her to the bone. After so many hours spent on the run, in the rain, soaked and bedraggled, it felt so good to be in a real bed.

But there was something missing. She couldn’t avoid it or deny it.

She reached under her pillow in her fitful sleep, feeling mindlessly, instinctively for the Bloodstone. It was not there.

Of course.
She knew who had taken it; who now carried it. How would she get it back from him?
What’s the plan?
Airel, having showered as well, napped beside her, breathing in and out with soft sighs.

Kim was so exhausted she felt like she could sleep for weeks. Yet she didn’t feel the slightest bit refreshed. If anything, she felt even more tired. Now that the Bloodstone had gone, she wasn’t sure what to do with herself. All she knew was that she was tired. So very tired. The voices that called to her inside her head, once interesting and full of ancient wisdom, now grated irritatingly against her seared conscience, shaving away in layers every forethought she attempted to coalesce into something—anything—coherent.

She felt like she was going insane.

What was it that drew her originally to the little red stone? On the cliff top, amidst the scuffle of angels and demons, while lives and destinies were altered irrevocably roundabout her, it had called to her in the warp of time…

She could hear voices. They spoke unspeakable usurpations to her ragged mind, drawing her out of herself and into…into…something that tasted sweet. Something intoxicating.
Something I need.

She wanted to kill something; anything. She grasped the pillow with both hands and bit down on it with her jaws, her face contorting in the darkness into a visage of rage. The world was
such
an unjust place. But…she would make it right.
Yes…

Besides,
she thought,
the Bloodstone is mine.
She was weary, yes, but mostly she was tired of being the third wheel in this band of impossible personalities. With the Bloodstone she could see things, feel things that had not yet come to pass, things she could not put into words…

Was it so bad?

She was strong enough. At least when she had it in her hand. Oh, how desperately she wanted to hold it, to touch it once more. It was like sinking into the softest mattress on a lazy Sunday, curling up inside the womb of a thick down comforter, pulling the folds up over her head, muffling the world.

She would be the one to set things right. She would be the key.

It is my destiny.
She had heard as much.

I will be patient.
She agreed with the whispers in the darkness.

I will wait.
The Bloodstone would return to her. It was irresistible, really. She would be the key to peace, a lasting cease-fire, the only one in all of history that would actually work, that would really last. There would be an end to all wars, and it would start in her flesh. She, with the Bloodstone, would be the catalyst. The spark. The first flame.

As her reward for her patience, for her labors, she too would possess long life and beauty. Like Airel, she too would be strong beyond her wildest dreams. She too would not only be able to heal her own flesh, but also the infirmities of others.

Her mind drifted once more. The Bloodstone’s distant whispering call warmed her as she slipped into a world where she was not the dumb luck sidekick, but the hero.

“Destroy it. Destroy it. Destroy it,” Michael whispered a subconscious mantra, his throat catching in desperation as he stared at the Bloodstone from across the room. It sat pulsing on the television cabinet, calling to him like a potential lover, offering everything, making promises, clapping blinders on his eyes that prevented him from seeing anything but itself. It was all gratification and no consequence.

He squeezed his eyes shut. He could not deny that he wanted what it offered him.
What red-blooded man could resist, anyway?
Anything and everything he could imagine and then some, it was all there inside the Bloodstone. Though he knew that the life it offered was fraudulent, that the healing of which it profanely whispered was bondage, that the sensual pleasures on display were paper-thin disguises worn by ancient principalities…

It was the kingdom of the Self, and he would be master, by God, and at last. He would bend no more to anyone other than The Alexander. He would inherit the mantle of his father and surpass him. In every conceivable way. He would crush all opposition, command his thousands upon thousands. He would usher in the final war, and in that obliteration of all that is, he would captain, finally, ultimate peace. There would be stillness. He would rule everything under the blackened sun.

Michael pressed his palms to his head and squeezed.
Destroy it…

The wound he bore, that now had spread over his whole chest was raw and red; sickly fingers reached out in purple red spirals, enlarging its territory over his heart, grasping for more, still more. And it ached, wretchedly before, and now beautifully, now that he carried the Bloodstone.

He clawed backward desperately in his mind, but backward was forward and he was really confused. He tried to attain clarity; everything was so fuzzy, so…red.