Midnight Kiss (17 page)

“Why don’t you take a nap?” her mother said.

“I think I’ll go take in some fresh air instead.” Autumn was aware of the worried looks that passed between her mother and Sharon as she walked out of the kitchen. Wondering what they thought, she plucked eight-month-old Patrick from the bottom step of the staircase and handed him to Colin. With a lithe movement she caught the football flying through the air and glared at the twins. “Football is not allowed in the house. If you two want to play, go out back.” She handed the ball back to a sulky Dylan, stepped over her brother Bain, who was sleeping in the middle of the living room floor, and went out the front door.

Autumn sat down in the white rocker and sighed. She shivered as a breeze blew. She was cold, but not enough to go back into the confusion to get a jacket.

“Want some company?” Her father came out, handed her a jacket, and, not bothering to wait for an answer, sat in the other rocker.

Autumn smiled. “Thanks.” She slipped on the jacket and slowly rocked back and forth. Her father was a giant of a man, who could strike terror into the hearts of every criminal walking the streets of New York. The men in his precinct respected his fair judgment, admired his cunning and logic, and feared his temper. To her, he was a huge teddy bear and one of the men in her life she always tried to measure up to.

“Are you happy here, honey?”

Autumn studied the worn toes of her sneakers. If he had asked that question last week, her answer would have been, “Ecstatic.” But today, she didn’t know how to answer. “I guess so.”

Her father frowned. “I’ve been sleeping better lately.”

Concerned, she glanced at him. “I didn’t know you were having trouble sleeping.”

“Have been for years.” He looked off into the distance. “Five years, to be more precise.”

“Five years!” Was her strong father ill?

“The trouble started the day you graduated from the academy and were hired by the force.”

She was incredulous. “You didn’t want me to join the force?”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t want you to join, I just thought it wasn’t the right choice for you.”

“Because I’m a coward and couldn’t live up to the O’Neil name?” There, she had said it.

Her father stopped rocking and stared. “Lord, Autumn, where did you get such an idea? You a coward?” He chuckled at the very thought. “I’ve seen you tangle with your brothers. I also seem to remember pulling your butt out of more trouble because of some fool-hardy dares they issued you. If ever there wasn’t a coward, honey, it’s you.”

“Dad, don’t you understand, I failed.” She looked away. “I couldn’t pull the trigger to save my own life. What would have happened if it was my partner’s life on the line? Would I have been able to do my job?” She shuddered, then felt the warmth of her father’s hands cover her cold ones.

“It takes a certain kind of person to knowingly take another person’s life. It takes a hardness of the heart. I’m not saying you have to be heartless to be a good cop, but you have to be able to put a distance between you and the criminal.” He squeezed her hands. “I’m glad to say you don’t have one iota of hardness in you. I knew it five years ago, and I lived in fear of it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“The day you were born, your mother and I made a vow not to interfere with your life. It was the same vow we made for each of your brothers.” He stood up and opened his arms.

Autumn jumped up and buried herself in his embrace. He wasn’t upset she left the force. “Have I told you lately how much I love you?”

A chuckle rumbled in his chest. “Those words are music to my soul.” He lifted her chin. “All I ask is that you be happy.”

Autumn forced the image of Thane from her mind. “You’re not upset that an O’Neil isn’t on the force?”

He frowned and glanced at the closed door. “Between you and me, there’s still one too many O’Neils on the city payroll.”

She followed his gaze and guessed correctly. “Bain.”

“You were born with a gift for drawing, which, I might add, I always tried to encourage. He was born with the powerful gift for words. Where I got such talented children is beyond me.”

“Rory and Colin can sing a mean duet.”

“Hmmm, that leaves Donald.”

Impish delight danced in her eyes. “Six years of marriage and his wife is expecting their fourth child. Really, Dad, do you have to ask?”

Her father’s hearty laughter filled the house as they opened the door and walked back in.

Autumn went on upstairs, found an empty room, locked the door, and flopped down on the bed. She looked at the ceiling and mulled over patches of conversation she had had with her family. Her brother Donald wanted to know when she was going to enroll in art classes and Dylan and Douglas, the twins, asked if she could draw a Ninja Turtle. Her mother had wondered if there was a certain man in her life. When Autumn had hesitated over how to answer, her mother calmly said she had found a pair of man’s trousers in a closet and had pushed it to the rear so that her father wouldn’t discover it and have heart failure. She had kissed her mother’s cheek in gratitude.

Looking back on the past, she realized that only her stubbornness had gotten her through the police academy and five years of police work. She had been so busy trying to live up to the O’Neil name, she had failed to realize how unhappy she had been.

A great weight lifted as she came to peace with herself for quitting the force. She wasn’t police material, and there wasn’t any reason to be ashamed of that. People weren’t born into a career, they grew into it.

For the first time in twenty-seven years she asked herself what would make her happy. Every one of her brain cells shouted,
Thane
! Her family still loved her, but would Thane? To deserve his love and respect, she needed to start with the truth. Maybe it wasn’t too late.

Autumn jumped off the bed and headed for the door. She glanced at her watch; it was time for the Thanksgiving meal. She hoped her father had remembered to get Paddy. Where would Thane be, at the home or at his apartment? She hurried down the stairs, praying her family would forgive her for not joining them at the table after all the trouble they went through to get the entire family together.

She rounded the newel and skirted a Lego tower in the hallway. “Mom, Dad, I have to go out for a—” Her feet skidded to a halt. Thane was standing in the crowded kitchen being introduced by Paddy to her mother and sister-in-law.

Her mother turned toward her. “You said something, dear?”

“Ah, no. It wasn’t important.” What was he doing here?

“Autumn, you must know Paddy’s doctor, Thane Clayborne. He was kind enough to drive Paddy over and accept our invitation to stay for dinner.”

Thane reached out and shook Autumn’s numb hand. “Ms. O’Neil and I have met.”

Paddy, who was sitting in a comfortable chair surrounded by his great-grandchildren, started to choke. Autumn snatched back her hand when everyone turned to look at Paddy. “Yes, we have.”

Thane grinned at Autumn. “It’s very kind of you to make room for one more.”

“No problem, there’s plenty to go around.” She debated whether she should throw herself into Thane’s arms and kiss him senseless in front of her entire family or go along with whatever game he was playing.

“Hey, Doc, come on out here,” Donald shouted. “There’s only ten minutes left on the clock.”

Bain yelled, “Yeah, leave the womenfolk alone so they can get back to work.”

Thane coughed at the look of disgust on Autumn’s face. “I guess I’ll go join the menfolk.”

Autumn caught how her mother’s calculating glance landed on Thane and slid down the length of his body. Autumn hid her grin behind a hand. Her mother was judging what size pants Thane was wearing. “Please excuse me, I need to attend to some womanly duties.”

Thane frowned as he joined the men in front of the television. The Autumn he knew would have been mad about her brother’s sexist comment, even if it had been told jokingly. Why was she amused instead?

The answer soon became obvious to Thane. The men in the family weren’t spoiled; they did their full share in helping out. While the women finished the preparations for the meal, the men took care of the children. The only complaint he heard came from Colin, who wasn’t very happy that his infant son needed a diaper change during a touchdown.

When everyone finally sat down at the table, Thane was slightly overwhelmed by the size of the gathering. Autumn hadn’t been exaggerating when she’d warned him about her family. Several conversations went on at the same time, and food seemed to be passed back and forth nonstop. Love for one another was evident in everything they did.

Thane grinned at the little girl in pigtails sitting across from him. She was eating a mashed-potatoes-and-jelly sandwich. Feeling Autumn’s mother’s eyes on his, he turned to her. “The meal is excellent, Mrs. O’Neil.”

“Call me Caitlin.” She glanced down the long table at her unusually quiet daughter. “Autumn’s the one who did most of the work.”

Thane looked at Autumn. Maybe he should have waltzed into the house, pulled Autumn into his arms, and kissed her senseless. At least her family would know how he felt and, sensing their internal goodness, would have allowed him to sit by her. As it was, she was three places away from him. He raised his voice to be heard over the din. “My compliments to the chef.”

Autumn’s blush earned a few speculative glances from her sisters-in-law. “Thank you.” She pushed her string beans into her mashed potatoes and moved the stuffing into the empty spot on her plate.

Thane went back to eating. He was overjoyed to see that his presence had an impact on her. He hadn’t known what to expect when he’d walked into the house with Paddy. He was trying to build a relationship by the seat of his pants. The thought of losing Autumn was unbearable. What he needed was a few quiet moments with her. If only she would explain what she had meant by all the comments about respect and responsibilities.

“Hey, Doc, ever deliver a baby?”

“Afraid not, Donald. My specialty is at the other end of the life cycle, geriatrics.”

He watched as the children finished their meals and headed outside, leaving the two chairs between him and Autumn empty. “So, Colleen, when did you say you were due?”

Twenty minutes later he could have delivered a baby blindfolded. He heard tales of contractions, umbilical cords, and postnatal depression. What the O’Neil wives didn’t know about conceiving, carrying, and delivering a baby hadn’t been written. He listened patiently, although what he really wanted to do was help Autumn clear the table and talk to her.

“Come on, Thane, the big game is starting,” Donald shouted from the living room.

He glanced at Autumn’s back as she dried plate after plate. Now was his chance to be alone with her. He stood up. “If you ladies will excuse me, I believe Autumn could use some help.”

He was within touching distance of her when Sharon plopped a baby in his arms. “You get on out of here. Guests don’t do dishes. Go take Patrick to his father, and we’ll help with the dishes.”

Thane saw Autumn smile at his uneasiness with the child, and frowned. So pediatrics wasn’t his field either. He carried the gurgling baby into the living room and wondered which one of Autumn’s brothers was the father.

“Are you ready to leave?” Paddy questioned.

Thane passed the baby to the first pair of empty male hands. “Now?” He didn’t want to leave; he hadn’t talked to Autumn yet.

“I want to get back in time for dessert. Hear they’re having pumpkin pie.”

Autumn had heard her grandfather and hurried from the kitchen, her hands nervously squeezing the dish towel. “We’re having pumpkin pie too.” Thane couldn’t leave. She hadn’t had time to talk to him yet. “I’ll go get you a piece.”

“No.” Paddy glanced from Thane to his granddaughter. “I want to go now.”

Thane looked at the television. “Look, Paddy, they just kicked off. How about we stay and watch the first quarter?”

“No.”

Autumn’s father looked at his father. “What’s the matter, Dad, don’t you want to spend time with your family?”

“Of course I do, son.” He grinned at his grandsons. “But I have a hot date tonight.” Autumn’s brothers burst out laughing. “Lillian is saving me a seat for dessert.”

Thane looked longingly at Autumn. Paddy’s timing was terrible. With a shrug he helped Paddy put on his coat and walked with him to the front door. Farewells, good-byes, and kisses were shared.

“You stop back in, Doc,” Bain said, Donald echoed the offer.

Thane smiled directly at Autumn. “I’m sure you all will be seeing me before you head back to New York.” He could have told them he’d be back within the hour, just as soon as he settled Paddy in the home.

Autumn’s father helped with getting Paddy situated in Thane’s car. After telling his father that they would all stop in at Maple Leaf tomorrow, he shut the car door and faced Thane. “I want to thank you again for bringing Paddy.”

Thane grasped his outstretched hand. “It was my pleasure, sir. I’ll be back later. You and I have something very important to discuss.”

Rory O’Neil shot a worried look at his father.

Thane chuckled. “The wrong O’Neil, sir.” He was still laughing as he pulled out of the driveway and headed for the home.

Autumn stood on the porch tapping her foot, irritated with Paddy. Thane, the man she loved, was driving away. She glanced up at her father as he joined her. “He’s despicable.”

“Who, Thane?”

“No, Paddy.” She glared at the departing car.

Her father stared at the car and then looked back at Autumn. His laugh vibrated in the air. “You’re in love with him.”

#

Autumn scowled at her father’s grin.

“Well, why are you staring at me?” He held his hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t send him away.”

“You think I did?”

“I didn’t see you asking him to stay. For that matter, young lady, I didn’t see you doing anything.” He looked at the closed house door. “Didn’t your mother teach you anything?”

“What would you like me to do?”

“Go after him!” His voice resounded with authority. “You’re an O’Neil. An O’Neil always gets his man.”