Midnight Runes (The Bestowed Ones) (18 page)

I had a list of things I wanted to discuss with him, but I had to prioritize. “I don’t mind that you’re here, but you have to at least pretend to behave.”

“Oh, come on. I’m just egging him on a little.”

“Don’t. The last thing I want is for you to get into a fight over something stupid.”

“You’re not something stupid. And I wouldn’t fight him here. Although it is tempting since he would get suspended and I wouldn’t.”

I chose to ignore him instead of responding to prevent the conversation going down a dark road. It definitely wouldn’t help if I told him he didn’t stand a chance against Landon. “What are you going to be for Halloween?” I asked. I was getting better at thinking on my feet, and that made me a little sad.

“I’m not sure yet. It’d be really cool if you stopped by. Jared’s going to be there for some of it, and he’ll bring Elyse.”

I remember Elyse briefly talking about what she was going to do on Halloween. She didn’t know if she wanted to go to Trevor’s or not because she was waiting for me to tell her how I felt about it. “I still don’t know for sure, but maybe.”

“You know my parent’s parties go into the early morning hours, so you wouldn’t miss it entirely if you came late. You can come with them, or have someone drop you off and then go home with your parents, or I’ll drive you home. But anyway, why don’t we go out after the dance tonight? It’s been so long. We can catch up.”

“I’m not sure,” I said. “We sort of planned on changing and going back to Elyse’s house to hang out.” I could tell he was waiting for me to invite him, and I was sure he would accept without hesitation. The issue was that I didn’t anticipate it going over so well with the others. The evening was turning out to be tense, even though I specifically asked for it not to be. I was pretty sure Landon could restrain himself, but maybe forcing them into the same room without the threat of consequences wasn’t the best idea.

He looked away. “I get it if you don’t want to hang out with me.”

“It’s just that you’re putting everyone on edge tonight.”

“I hate that he was there to protect you.”

“He wasn’t there
with
us, Trev. It was just supposed to be Elyse and me. We didn’t know anyone else was there.”

“He has no right to even be here. I don’t like him. I don’t trust him. You shouldn’t either.”

“You don’t know him.” I had to stop myself and take a breath. I didn’t want to get worked up again.

“And you think you do? You have no idea what he’s capable of,” he said.

“You’re right. I don’t know. Everyone is always so secretive and determined to keep me out. Well I have news for you: I have my own plan.”

“He’s ruthless. He’s not someone I want you messing with.”

“But you can?”

“I can handle myself.”

“You can make your opinion known all you want to. It’s my choice what I do, not yours.”

He opened his mouth to fire back a response, but hesitated. “I don’t want you upset, and that’s all you’ve been since I came. I just had to see you and have a dance or two. I won’t stay much longer.”

Now it was my turn to feel guilty. “Just don’t start trouble, and I’ll be perfectly happy.”

“You and I both know that’s not true.”

“I’ll be as happy as I can be, all things considered,” I said.

The song ended, and we stopped swaying. It was an unusually long pause before the next song started. We stood there, arms around each other, waiting.

“One more song,” he suggested.

We began to sway again, and the uneasiness dissipated. “You know, even though your arrival tonight didn’t go smoothly, I’m still glad to see you,” I said.

“Me too. Of all the things that have changed in my life, what I hate the most is that you’re not as big of a part of it as you used to be.”

I wanted to cry from sentimental joy; I wanted to laugh with bitterness. I wanted to hug him and tell him everything would be all right if given enough time; I wanted to punch him for choosing to do this to us. I stayed silent because there wasn’t any response I could give that wouldn’t either start an argument or make him feel worse than he already sounded. Why was my life so complicated? It was supposed to be a great year. We both lapsed into silence for the remainder of the song.

When it ended, I tightly wrapped my arms around him, not wanting our time together to end. He tightened his arms around my waist. I closed my eyes and enjoyed our embrace, savoring the moment. It seemed like it had been forever since I’d last hugged him. As I reflected on that and compared it to the present, I noticed a difference.

This hug wasn’t like they used to be. He held back emotionally. I felt it.

We never used to keep secrets from each other…until recently, that is. After all our years of knowing each other, he was an open book to me. Simple to read. Easy to predict. Straightforward. And being with each other was effortless. Some of that I could attribute to my emotional gift, some just because I knew him so well.

As we stood beneath the soft glow cast by the decorative lights, I felt anything but tranquil. There was an edginess to the air around him. It disrupted my normal sense of familiarity with him. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but he felt altered.

I loosened my grip, and he responded by doing the same. I pulled away just far enough to read his face. I searched in his eyes for the answer. He was reserved, hesitant. I searched deeper, letting all thoughts fade away. I allowed myself to match what he felt. I became enveloped in his anger and turmoil hiding just under his calm façade. He was a swirling mass of dark emotions.

“What are you into?” I whispered, more to myself than to him.

He closed his eyes and gently shook his head, breaking my gaze. He gave me a half-hearted smile. “You always have to read me.” He reached up to unlock my hands from around his neck. After raising one arm and kissing the back of my hand, he said, “Until next time,” then walked away.

My heart pounded, and I turned to watch him walk through the open gym doors.

I did it again. I’d ruined it.

After he was out of sight, I became aware of the upbeat song and the dancing bodies around me while I stood on the dance floor.

Elyse and Jared made their way through the crowd to my motionless self. They both looked worried, although for different reasons. Elyse was concerned about me, while Jared was more concerned about Trevor. I didn’t hold it against him; I was too.

“Did he leave?” Elyse asked. I nodded. “I didn’t even see him go. One minute, I see you two dancing and talking, and the next time I look over, he’s gone.”

I shook my head. “I didn’t ask him to leave. He didn’t want to stay longer than a dance or two.” Jared studied me.

“You want me to sit down with you for a bit?” Elyse asked.

“No, keep dancing. I’ll be alright in a few minutes.”

I’ve just got to shake it off
, I reasoned with myself.
I’ll reflect on it later.

“Don’t let this ruin your night,” Elyse begged. “It’s almost over.”

“I won’t,” I said convincingly, hopefully enough to convince myself. “I need to get something to drink. I’ll find you guys.”

I weaved through the dancing crowd and hoped I’d set off in the right direction. I just needed a second to clear my head.

I noticed my group clustered around the refreshment table, and I made a last-minute decision to turn right and head out into the hallway for a moment of solitude. I didn’t want to be bombarded with questions. I had plenty of my own running through my head at the moment.

I strolled down the hall, my fingertips grazing the lockers. The gap between the locker doors and their frames created disturbances in the smooth, thick flow of paint. A perfect reflection of my life in this instant. Life was smooth sailing the majority of the time, but hiccups were bound to create distance between the good times.

I felt stuck in that gap. Maybe I’d only see the light again if I figured out what troubled Trevor. The only way I could find out was to be around him more and read him. I’d have to be natural about it, because he certainly wouldn’t talk about it. He’d offered to spend time together, so maybe I could meet up with him another time. I vowed I would figure it out, no matter what.

I returned to the dance, resolved that my friends would only act strange about tonight if I did.

The guys still stood by the refreshment table. I approached them.

“I’m going to try this again and hopefully I’ll get a better response. We only have thirty minutes left, and each of you owes me a dance.”

Their expressions changed from dejected to animated, but they played it off as they adjusted their ties and straightened their postures. I felt honored, but I wasn’t fooled by their attempt at playing it cool.

“I’m first,” Zach said as he stepped forward. “And with the amount of time left, I get two songs.”

We managed to find Elyse and Jared on the floor. After two songs, Logan showed up, ready for his turn, then Wayne took Logan’s place. At the end of the second song with him, Landon appeared and tapped him on the shoulder.

“I believe the lady owes me a dance. Two, actually. May I?”

Wayne relinquished his position, and Landon quickly filled it.

Just then, the DJ announced it was time to play the last slow songs of the evening.

I tensed.

“I hope you’re not thinking of backing out,” Landon said.

I raised my eyes to his and took a small step toward him. I placed one hand in his and rested the other on his shoulder. We moved closer.

“Because there’s no way you’re getting out of it that easy,” he teased. He rested his hand on the small of my back and gently drew me in. “Follow my lead,” he said.

I pulled against him, panicked. “Uh, you don’t plan on dancing fancy, do you? I never have.”

“Fancy dancing?” he smiled. “It’s much more fun than standing there and rocking side to side. The next song we’ll dance boring. Trust me, it’s all in the leading, anyway.”

His confidence calmed me. I released the tension in my shoulders, and off we went. We glided across the floor, weaving between the other couples. I let him and the music carry me away. We gracefully floated over the dance floor, our movement fluid and smooth. Then he lifted our grasped hands and guided me into a turn. I giggled with amazement as I realized he was right. All I had to do was follow his lead.

“See?” he said close to my ear once I returned to him. “Nothing to be afraid of.”

We continued that way for the rest of the song and part of the next one. He switched to what he called the boring style about halfway through and explained that he wanted to dance like everyone else for a bit. I wished he didn’t. I really enjoyed the other style more than I had thought I would.

Now that we were within inches of each other and effortlessly swaying to the music, I became more aware of his closeness. I was comfortable with him. He felt relaxed, content. It was an entirely different experience than being close to Trevor.

“Did Trevor have anything interesting to say?” he asked.

I searched his face. “He thinks I should stay away from you. And warned me that you’re dangerous. Ruthless even.”

“Does his opinion match yours?”

I had to look away to compose my thoughts. I didn’t want to lie to him, and he’d probably know anyway. “I suspect you could be, but you haven’t been with me.”

“Where you’re concerned, everything’s complicated.”

“The theme of my life lately,” I mumbled. I felt like no one was honest with me anymore. Well, Landon did show me some of what he was capable of, but only after I told him why I met with Cassandra. I couldn’t help but feel it was give and take with him. I didn’t have any more information to share, so he didn’t offer any either—even though there was loads I had yet to learn.

The last song began. We all linked arms and formed a large circle on the dance floor. My last homecoming of high school was coming to an end. I was already too full of emotion to let this one affect me.

W
e changed and settled in at Elyse’s. I traded my dress for jeans and a zip hoodie. I never would have guessed that the guys had just come from a semi-formal dance. They looked as casual as ever. We still looked dressy, with our hair styled and more makeup on than normal.

Elyse designated the upstairs TV for movies and the downstairs one for Wii. I passed on the video games, popped a few bags of popcorn for us, and claimed a space on the comfortable couch with the other girls. They had their digital cameras out and flipped through the shots from the dance as they reminisced over the highlights…which, of course, brought the conversation back to me.

“So, Brynn, what did you think of Trevor showing up like that?” Samantha asked.

I felt all the girls’ eyes on me. I knew this was going to be a hot topic. “I have mixed feelings about it.”

“What did he say?” Lauren asked.

“Some nonsense about our breakup being temporary. He sounded confident that we’d be back together in the future. It’s like he has to resolve something first. I don’t understand it at all.”

“Is he a psychic now? That’s about the craziest thing he’s said yet. So why aren’t you together now?” Samantha asked.

“Right?!” I sighed. “I can’t ask him too much. He just gets upset. He’s so confusing.”

“I hope you’re not going to wait around for him to make up his mind,” Lauren stated.

“No, I’m living my life. He’ll always be special to me, if we get back together at some point or not. But I won’t have closure until I figure out what he’s up to.”

“Are you going to have Jared try to find out for you?” Samantha asked.

“I would, but Jared rarely sees or talks to him anymore. I’m going to have to spend more time with him. He even asked me if I wanted to hang out tonight, so he seems open to it. Maybe I’ll go to his parent’s Halloween party next week after all,” I said, looking to Elyse. She nodded.

The conversation switched to another topic, but I couldn’t follow along.

O
n Monday morning, Emilee approached me at my locker. Apparently she had something to get off her mind. What a great way to start the day.