Midnight Thunder(INCR) (18 page)

She looked startled. “Is that because I—”

“It's because of everything—being with the Brotherhood, keeping Herb and Rosie company, talking about the future of the ranch. But mostly it's because I need to think, and when I'm with you, my brain checks out.”

She exhaled slowly. “I'll miss having you there, but...you're probably doing the right thing. I'll save the wine and candles for next time.”

“You planned a celebration?” To hell with thinking things through. “Then I'll—”

“No.” She stepped closer and reached up to brush a bit of debris from his cheek. “Follow your instincts. I'm in this for the long haul. One night doesn't matter.”

“Easy for you to say.” His gaze lingered on her mouth.

“Not easy. But I admire your decision to stay here tonight. And your ability to gentle an undisciplined horse.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “And your talent for whistling.”

“No fair. Now you're playing dirty.”

Instantly she looked contrite. “I am and I'm so sorry!”

“Don't be. I love it when you tease me. I love that you planned a private party for us. I love
you
.”

She swallowed. “I love you, too. I'm glad I got back in time to watch you riding Hematite. You looked...happy.”

“You bet I was happy. He trusted me enough to let me up on his back. That's a great feeling, when you earn the trust of an animal that's been abused.”

“I'm sure it is.” She held his gaze. “You might want to consider—” But instead of finishing the sentence, she looked away and muttered something under her breath that sounded like, “Shut up, idiot.”

“What? What might I want to consider?”

“Nothing. Ignore me. You'd better go take your shower.” Rising on tiptoe, she gave him a quick kiss before heading to the house.

He stared after her in confusion. She'd been about to give him her opinion, something she'd never been shy about doing. They'd been discussing Hematite, so the comment she'd stifled must have had something to do with the horse. Why censor it?

Maybe she'd decided that she didn't know enough about training horses to offer an opinion. No, that didn't fit. She would have just said that. Instead she hadn't wanted him to know what she was thinking.

He knew better than to pester her about it. If she hadn't told him now, she wasn't going to. But trying to figure it out on his own would drive him crazy.

 

17

A
N
HOUR
LATER
, Lexi sat in the ranch's cozy living room sipping a beer and watching Herb's and Rosie's joyous expressions. At last they had what they'd longed for—their three favorite boys back home at one time. Everyone else had a beer except Rosie, who preferred Baileys and had decided to give herself a few more days before indulging in anything alcoholic.

She reposed like a queen in the room's most comfortable easy chair beside the hearth, her feet propped on an ottoman to show off her bright red toenails. Early this morning a manicurist and a hair stylist from her favorite salon had shown up at the hospital to give her, as Rosie phrased it, a tune-up.

Consequently her hair was styled and her nails polished. The minute she'd come home she'd changed into a lightweight lounge outfit in a warm blue that matched her eyes. She'd insisted on hearing every detail concerning Thunder Mountain Academy and had one of her boys in mind to handle the legal angle.

She'd been eager to discuss the logo, and they'd eliminated all but two of the designs. Rosie held them up. “Which one, then? The brown horseshoe with the green letters or the black horseshoe with deep blue letters? Other than the colors, they're pretty much the same. The green
M
might look a little more mountainish, but the blue is good, too.”

“I like the brown and green,” Cade said from his perch on the arm of the couch. “I've always liked that combination.” He smiled at Lexi, who sat at the opposite end of the couch.

She returned his smile. He'd been the first guy to fall in love with the color of her eyes. Come to think of it, he'd been the first guy to fall in love with her, period, not counting Jason Phelps in sixth grade.

Cade was the first guy she'd fallen for, too, not counting Jason Phelps, who'd thrown her over for Emmy Leech in seventh grade. Not long after Jason's defection, Rosie had brought Cade home to Thunder Mountain Ranch, and life hadn't been the same since.

Lexi couldn't imagine loving anyone the way she loved Cade. But oh, how she wished she'd kept her mouth shut earlier, down by the barn. At least she'd caught herself before finishing her thought.

Passing out unwanted advice was a bad habit. And in this case, she could have potentially interfered with a process that was Cade's alone. Just because she saw an obvious path for him didn't mean she should blurt it out, or that he should take it. He had to work this out for himself.

Finn sprawled on the couch's center cushion, his booted feet propped on the coffee table. Its surface was marred with the imprint of many boot heels. “I think the black with the blue is more of an attention-getter and it'll show up the best on a T-shirt.”

“I'll go with Finn on this one.” Damon had brought a kitchen chair into the room and straddled it while he sipped on his beer. “It's bold. I like bold.”

“I like the brown and green.” Herb occupied the other easy chair on the far side of the hearth. “It's softer, but it seems more academic.” He glanced at Lexi and Rosie. “Ladies?”

“I like the brown and green,” Lexi said. “It makes me think of growth, and that's what we want to achieve for the kids who come here.”

Rosie turned both logos around and gazed at them. “And I like the black and deep blue, because it makes me think of thunder and rain, which seems a heck of a lot more dynamic than seeds sprouting.”

“Wouldn't you know?” Herb glanced around in obvious amusement. “We're split down the middle. Anybody want to change his or her vote?”

“We should ask Chelsea,” Lexi said.

“I'm on it.” Finn left the couch with surprising speed. In minutes he'd photographed both logos and texted them to Chelsea. “I predict she'll vote for the black and deep blue.”

“Good call,” Damon said. “Any woman with purple streaks in her hair will want the bold statement.”

Rosie laughed. “Finn, are you involved with a woman who has purple hair?”

“We've worked together, but we're not
involved
.”

Damon cleared his throat. “Couldn't prove it by me. When it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, usually it's a—”

“Stuff it, Harrison.” Finn concentrated on the image captured on his phone. “You know what? We could add a lightning bolt to the black and deep blue, but it wouldn't look right with brown and green. Another reason to go with the black and deep blue.”

“A lightning bolt.” Damon's gaze settled on Cade. “Sure you don't want to change your vote, Gallagher?”

“Nope.” He drained his bottle. “I don't see this academy as a lightning-bolt situation.” He got up and offered to fetch more beers.

Lexi watched him walk into the kitchen, his lean-hipped stride taunting her with possibilities she wouldn't be enjoying tonight. He was gorgeous. Any woman would be lucky to—

“Lexi?”

Rosie's voice broke into her X-rated thoughts. “What?”

“I'm not sure what your plans are, but you're welcome to stay over tonight.”

“Thank you, but I really need to get home.” She wondered if Rosie had caught her staring longingly at Cade. Probably. Rosie didn't miss much.

“Okay. I just... Well, you've been a big help and you just seem...to belong here.”

Yep, Rosie was still matchmaking. “That's a lovely thing to say. I—”

“
Chels likes them both!”

Grateful for the interruption, Lexi glanced at Finn. “Equally? But we need to pick one, so what now?”

“I guess we have a little time. She wants to test them on some marketing people she knows and see which gets the best response.” He looked up from the screen. “You all okay with that?”

“Sure,” Rosie said. “I don't care if she's dyed her hair every color of the rainbow. The woman obviously knows something about promotion.”

“She definitely does.” Finn's proud smile revealed a lot, probably way more than he intended.

Damon, of course, had to point it out. “I give you exhibit A.” He gestured toward Finn. “The boy is besotted.”

“Am not.”

“Are so.”

“I love it.” Rosie gazed at them fondly. “It's like old times listening to you two bicker. But much as I'd love to stay here all afternoon and be part of every deep discussion, it's time for me to retire to the bedroom and take a nap. I need my beauty sleep.”

Her announcement created a flurry of activity. Amid hugs and well wishes, Rosie disappeared into her bedroom. That was Lexi's cue to leave, too. Her overnight bag was already in her truck. The adventure, at least the part where Rosie had scared them all to death, was over.

Cade offered to walk her out, and she accepted. She couldn't shake the idea that after today, everything would change. She might have fantasized that Cade would spend his days here and his nights at her apartment, but after his decision not to come over tonight, she wasn't counting on that.

When they reached her truck, she turned to face him with a sense of inevitability. This felt like a much bigger goodbye than it logically should be. He'd be here, and she planned to visit often.

He braced a hand against her door and shoved back the brim of his hat. “I desperately want to share your bed tonight.”

She gulped. “I know.”

He traced a finger along her cheek, down the curve of her throat and into the vee of her shirt. “I think you want me there, too.”

“Yep.”

His gaze searched hers. “When I came back, I couldn't think of anything but making love to you.”

She couldn't help smiling. “I was pretty focused on that myself.”

“I'm glad you were. I'm glad we had the chance to find out the chemistry's still there. I guess it always will be. I'm counting on it, in fact.”

Her breath caught. “Why?”

“Because I've made a decision, and it feels right to me. I won't make love to you again until I figure out what I'm supposed to do with my life. You were right about the dreams and goals. But when you're in my arms, you become my dream and my goal. I can't think beyond that.”

“I get it.” Was she disappointed? Oh, yeah. But she knew exactly what he was talking about.

“Then there's this business with my new relatives. I don't have a handle on that, either. I've promised to go over to the Last Chance Ranch with you next month, and I dread it.”

“I know you do.”

He sighed. “Bottom line, I need time alone to think things through.”

“That's perfectly understandable.”

His green eyes were filled with regret. “It could take a while.”

“I hope it doesn't take five years.” She'd meant it as a joke, but he looked horrified.

“Dear God, no! But I don't... I can't say exactly how long...”

“I know.” Her heart ached for him, for them. “But when you do figure it out...”

“You'll be the first one I tell.” He leaned in. His kiss was filled with love and anguish.

As she clung to him, she memorized the velvet touch of his mouth and the passionate thrust of his tongue. She didn't know how soon she'd be back in his arms, but the wait was guaranteed to be tough. And much too long.

* * *

A
S
THE
DAYS
went by, Lexi saw Cade whenever she went out to the ranch, but he made sure they were never alone. She sat through a farewell dinner for Finn and Damon without exchanging a single private word with Cade. She had a feeling he'd told everyone about his decision because no one asked questions.

While she didn't want to imagine what that discussion had been like, she was grateful that their relationship hadn't been a dinner topic that night. Talk about Thunder Mountain Academy had dominated the conversation instead. The brown-and-green logo had tested best, even with the addition of a lightning bolt to the black and deep blue. Chelsea was almost finished with the website.

Once she'd completed it, they'd pick a date to launch the project on the Kickstarter platform. Damon had taken inventory of the renovations necessary and had decided they needed to build a fourth cabin so they'd have a greater number of beds to offer. He'd blocked out two weeks in July to come back and tackle the work.

Cade's cousin Molly had been recruited to set up a curriculum. Lexi would oversee the riding lessons built into it, although she wouldn't be the on-site teacher. She'd made a list of candidates she'd approach in the next few weeks.

The dinner had ended, and she'd hugged both Finn and Damon, who were flying out the next day. She hadn't hugged Cade, and he hadn't offered to walk her to her truck. The distance between them was tough to deal with, but she hadn't expected a quick resolution. He had a lot to work through.

She forced herself not to count the days since she'd last touched him, held him close and made love to him. But she knew they were mounting up. Her clinics absorbed her attention whenever she conducted them, but in her free time, she searched for excuses to go out to the ranch. She told herself she went to see Rosie and check on progress with the academy.

Good thing, because if she'd driven out there to see Cade, she would have been disappointed. He was always busy with the horses. Rosie and Herb didn't discuss Cade with her anymore, and that felt strange, too. She felt excluded from some grand plan, but she knew he had to accomplish this without her.

Finally,
finally
, she received a text from Cade.

Can you meet me at the corral tomorrow at ten?

Her adrenaline level spiked and she texted back one word—
Yes.
His timing was good. Her next clinic was two days away, but she'd secretly hoped he'd show up at her door for the big reveal. She'd imagined a passionate celebration in her apartment.

Yet did it matter in the long run how or where he unveiled his new program? If he'd discovered something significant about what he wanted from life, then any time was a good time to hear about it. He'd chosen the corral for their meeting. That likely meant his plan involved horses, which was promising.

She didn't sleep much that night and she was ready to leave her apartment way too early. After cleaning out her email inbox she played computer games until the clock on the screen told her she could leave.
Thank God.

Once on the road, she had to control the urge to speed. If she got picked up, she'd be late, and if she didn't, she'd be early. But driving at the speed limit was agony.

When she pulled up beside the barn, Rosie and Herb were both leaning against the railing of the corral. She expected a more private moment, but this was Cade's show, and if he wanted them there, he should have them there.

They both turned and came over to embrace Lexi.

“He's so excited,” Rosie said. “I'm glad you were available.”

“Me, too.”

“If you hadn't been, he was going to reschedule,” Herb said. “He mentioned that he didn't want you dropping everything to accommodate him.”

“Oh.” She put a hand to her chest, which felt tight with emotion. He'd listened. He'd really listened. “That's...very sweet.”

Rosie put her hand on Lexi's arm. “He loves you.”

She swallowed. “I love him, too.”

“Then you'll both be fine.” Rosie squeezed her arm. “Here he comes.”

She turned, and Cade walked out of the barn leading a fully saddled Hematite. His smile dazzled her as much as it had years ago when they'd been teenagers.

“Hey, Lexi.”

“Hey, Cade.”

“Can somebody please open the gate?”

Herb responded, moving quickly to open it. Lexi was too transfixed by the sight of Cade leading his glossy black horse to do anything but stare. She knew what he intended to do, and he was her hero.

Once he'd led Hematite into the corral, he spoke quietly to the horse. No singing this time. Obviously they were past that. Then he put his foot in the stirrup and swung easily into the saddle.