Midnight's Seduction (31 page)

One more thing she could cross off her list to do.

When she left her room and ventured into the great hall she had hoped to find Camdyn. She didn’t like how she found herself needing him, but she didn’t want to take the time to look deeper into her emotions. With her mother, the vision about Declan, and the threat of Deirdre attacking at any moment, she couldn’t handle any more.

The mood throughout the castle was strained. Saffron noticed it when she entered the hall and found Cara, Marcail, Reaghan, and Fiona playing cards.

In the kitchen Isla and Larena were baking. Usually the kitchen was a place where there was lots of conversation and laughter. But today there was nothing.

Saffron retraced her steps and made for the back tower that was closest to her room. She sank into the oversized chair and propped her feet on the ottoman. After a moment she picked up a book on the table next to her.

“Jane Eyre,”
she read the title aloud.

She’d always liked the book, but no matter how many times she read the first page, her mind kept wandering to the problems surrounding her.

Saffron gave up and put the book back. She stared out the window to the sea that seemed to stretch into eternity. She’d never felt the urge to go to sea, but now with all the walls closing in around her it sounded like a good option.

She had told everyone, including herself, that she was better, that she had gotten past what Declan had done to her. But the truth was, she was far from getting over it.

It would always be there in the back of her mind, reminding her of what he could do. Of how powerless she was against him.

She hated the thought of ever seeing him again. Saffron found it ironic that she had told Camdyn she wanted to be the one to kill Declan when she knew she wouldn’t be able to do it.

One look at Declan and she’d freeze. She’d remember the torture, the threats. But most important, she would recall how easily he had taken her sight with just a few words.

Someone with that kind of magic scared the hell out of her. And if Declan could do all of that, what would Deirdre do to her?

Saffron leaned her head back against the chair and wondered again what she was doing as a Druid. At one time she might have been able to help her friends, but now … now she would just get in the way.

*   *   *

Camdyn blinked against the snow that landed on his eyelashes. He stared across MacLeod land from his vantage point on the battlements. The ground was covered with unmarred snow.

The soft whistle of the wind from the sea was the only sound that broke the silence. With the sky heavy with thick clouds, it was difficult to determine where the sun was.

His ears picked up at the crunch of snow beneath a foot. Camdyn glanced to his left to see Hayden approach.

“I hope the bitch doesna make us wait long,” Hayden said as he stopped near Camdyn.

Camdyn rested his hands on the stones before him and looked at the trees swaying, knowing Hayden was referring to Deirdre. “I doona think she will.”

“Have Sonya and Broc returned?”

“No’ yet. They’ve been gone a while.”

Hayden grunted. “Aye, but hopefully whatever the trees tell Sonya will help us.”

“Broc still has no’ been able to locate either Deirdre or Declan?”

“Nay,” Hayden replied with a quick shake of his blond head, sending snow falling to his shoulders. “Laria thinks they are blocking themselves to us.”

“Which means they could arrive at any moment.” Damn but Camdyn was tired of this game. He wanted the battle to start so he could either get on with his life or be killed as the warrior that he was.

Hayden turned his head to Camdyn. “Gwynn could get nothing from the wind. All it would tell her was that trouble was coming.”

“It’s been telling her that.”

“And we didna need the wind to tell us what we already knew.”

“If Sonya comes back empty-handed, what is the plan?”

Hayden blew out a breath. “That I doona know. Maybe Saffron will have a vision.”

“She doesna have visions that include her future.”

“Damn. Then we pin all our hopes on Sonya.”

They lapsed into silence, and Camdyn found himself thinking of the other battles they’d had on MacLeod land. So many innocents, including the MacLeod clan Deirdre had murdered, had been taken on this land.

“I used to hate going into battle,” Camdyn said. “I did it because my laird demanded it of me, and because I was good with a sword. But I often wondered why they couldna sit down and talk it out.”

“That’s the first time I’ve heard you speak of your past,” Hayden said.

Camdyn shrugged and looked at the iced-over gray stones of the castle. “What is there to tell? We all have our pasts.”

“Verra true words, my friend.”

“You know we willna all survive this battle.”

Hayden briefly closed his eyes. “It is unlikely that we would all come away unscathed.”

“Deirdre is going to come at us with all she has.”

“Do you think Declan will join her?”

Camdyn smoothed away a lock of his hair that fallen into his eyes. “Aye. Why else would Laria choose Saffron?”

“Or you to watch her?”

He looked into Hayden’s black eyes and nodded. “Or me.”

Hayden’s eyes widened a fraction as he turned to face Camdyn. “You expect to die during the battle,” he said with surprise and fury lacing his voice.

“I doona have a wife. The only ones who are no’ mated are me, Ramsey, and Arran. I would rather it be my life than yours or that of one of the other Warriors with a wife.”

Hayden shook his head, disbelief hardening his features. “If you fall, who is going to keep Saffron from Declan?”

It was if Hayden knew exactly what to say to rile Camdyn. He took two deep breaths before he said, “Ramsey or Arran would gladly watch over her.”

“Hm. Of the three of you, why did Laria choose you to watch over Saffron?”

Camdyn gave a nonchalant shrug. “I doona know.”

“You do know. You know and you willna admit it.” Hayden took a step closer and looked deep into Camdyn’s eyes. “I know you lost a wife. I know you doona want to feel that kind of pain again, but I’ve also seen the way you look at Saffron. It’s no secret where you slept last night, Camdyn. So if you want to lie to yourself, go ahead. But do your brethren the courtesy of no’ lying to us.”

Hayden stalked past Camdyn, knocking his shoulder into Camdyn’s.

Camdyn blew out a breath and turned around. “Hayden. Wait.”

Hayden halted and spun around.

“Aye, I was with Saffron last eve, even when I knew I shouldna be.”

Hayden’s face relaxed and he walked back to Camdyn. “I know you, Logan, Ian, Ramsey, and Arran are all still adjusting to this time. Relationships between men and women are no’ taken as seriously as they were four centuries ago. Saffron is…”

“No’ like others,” Camdyn said. “Aye. I know.”

“We doona even know what Declan did to her.”

“I do.” Camdyn saw Hayden’s surprise and nodded. “I know why she doesna want to tell anyone. I doona know why she told me, but if I get the chance, I’m going to rip his head from his body.”

Hayden took a deep breath and glanced at the sky. “Saffron trusted you. It was that trust that got both of you through the labyrinth and to Laria. It could very well be that trust that Deirdre will attack.”

“I should never have gone to her last night. I can no’ give myself to someone as I did Allison. Watching Allison die broke me, Hayden. If I was a different man, a whole man, I might see where this leads with Saffron. But I can no’.”

“I think I understand. I know how lost I felt, how my soul shattered when I thought Isla was dead. She is my life. There will no’ be another woman for me.”

Camdyn nodded, but he had no words because he could see another woman for him.

Saffron.

“What are you going to do?” Hayden asked.

“I’ve no idea.”

“Do you know how Saffron feels? Has she said anything?”

Camdyn shook his head. “It’s no’ as if we’ve talked about this. The attraction is nigh crushing. I see her and I have to have her.”

“She’s one of the only single females in the castle. Maybe that’s all this is. Verra casual.”

“Casual?” Camdyn mulled that over for a moment and recalled how the passion had taken them, swept them. Seized them.

Casual it was not.

“Aye,” Hayden said. “Two people coming together who need each other during a short time. It can be an explosive relationship, from what I’ve read.”

Explosive. That could certainly apply to the hunger for Saffron that had consumed him last night. And even now.

“These relationships never last long,” Hayden continued.

“Do they end badly?”

Hayden shrugged. “Sometimes.”

“How do you know this?”

“Books, the telly, and of course the Internet.”

“How do you know the difference between a casual relationship and one that’s much more serious?”

Hayden scratched his cheek as he looked around him and leaned close. “Isla has a thing about reading romance novels. I picked one up to see what it was about. It’s amazing what you can learn about women from those books. Those books tell about serious relationships. You should borrow one sometime.”

“Aye.” Camdyn cleared his throat, still not totally convinced Hayden was speaking the truth. It was difficult not to believe him though.

Hayden had lived through four centuries while Camdyn had leapfrogged over them. So much had changed during that time, much more than just how women dressed.

“Maybe you’re right.”

“Of course I am,” Hayden said, and slapped him on the shoulder as he turned on his heel and walked away.

Camdyn watched Hayden walk away, thinking over all he had said.

Suddenly Hayden paused just before jumping down to the bailey and said, “At least you have no’ felt her magic different than other Druids. Because then you’d really be in trouble, my friend.”

Camdyn could only stare at the spot Hayden had been in, his mouth hanging open. He took two strides and leaped to the bailey, landing near Hayden.

“Stop,” he said. “Tell me what you mean.”

Hayden’s smile slowly disappeared. “As a Warrior you feel a Druid’s magic, aye?”

“Aye.”

“They all feel the same, aye?”

Again Camdyn said, “Aye.”

“I knew Isla was different the moment I felt her magic. It was unlike anything I had experienced before. I know where she is at all times because her magic has a different feel than that of other Druids.”

Camdyn’s chest constricted, his gaze going to the ground as the world tilted precariously around him.

“Lucan, Quinn, Galen, Broc, Logan, and Ian all say the same thing about their wife’s magic. So you have nothing to worry about.”

Camdyn slowly lifted his gaze to Hayden.

“Oh, fuck,” Hayden muttered.

CHAPTER

THIRTY-SIX

Camdyn’s ears began to ring as his mind refused to believe what Hayden had told him. After all he had suffered, Fate couldn’t have done this to him again.

“… you’ll see.”

Camdyn blinked and realized Hayden had been talking to him. He had no idea what Hayden had said, and at the moment it didn’t matter. He was still reeling from what he had learned.

“Just because I feel her magic differently doesna mean she’s meant to be mine, right?”

Hayden rubbed his hand over his jaw. “I can no’ answer that for sure. I doona know if anyone can.”

Camdyn turned away when he saw Quinn emerge from the castle and start toward them.

“What’s going on?” Quinn asked.

Hayden glanced at Camdyn before he said, “A wee bit of trouble.”

“It’s no’ anything to concern yourself over,” Camdyn said before Quinn could question him. “I’ll deal with it.”

“You shouldna have to deal with anything alone,” Quinn said.

But Camdyn was used to being alone, used to doing things on his own. Even at the castle, he kept to himself. It was a fact no one had questioned before.

Camdyn had learned at a very early age after being moved from family to family that if he wanted anything he had to rely only on himself. That became even clearer when Deirdre unbound his god.

“Quinn’s right, you know,” Hayden said.

Quinn’s green gaze was steadfast. “We’ll help you through whatever this is.”

Camdyn let out a bark of laughter. “The only thing that can help me now is distance, and I willna be getting that anytime soon.”

“This has to do with Saffron, does it no’?” Quinn asked.

“He feels her magic,” Hayden said to Quinn.

Quinn let out a long, low whistle.

Camdyn ran a hand through his hair and sighed loudly. “I was content by myself. Happy even. I didna ask for this.”

“Running away willna help. You can no’ run away from this,” Hayden said.

Quinn inhaled a deep breath. “You doona have to be alone in this world. Why no’ take what is before you?”

“I did take it,” Camdyn said with a curse. “I took Saffron even knowing I could never be anything more to her.”

Quinn’s brow furrowed. “Why is that?”

“I will never give my heart to another woman. I did that once already. And I certainly willna give it to a mortal woman so I can watch her grow old and die again.” Camdyn peeled back his lips and let loose the growl that had risen within him. “Never again.”

Hayden’s gaze followed Camdyn as he stormed away and leaped back to the top of the battlements. Hayden turned to Quinn and said, “This isna going to turn out well.”

“For Saffron’s sake, I hope it does.”

“It willna,” Ian said as he came out of the shadows of the stables.

Quinn jerked his chin to Ian. “You heard?”

“Aye. And I tried to warn Camdyn away from her last eve,” Ian said. “Dani says Saffron is vulnerable right now.”

Hayden grunted and crossed his arms over his chest. “She certainly is, but there’s no denying there is something that is pulling those two together.”

“They would make a fine pair,” Quinn said.

Ian brushed the snow from his shoulder. “If Camdyn will allow her. He’s closed himself off, and no’ just to Saffron.”

“He’s always been a loner,” Hayden said. “I only knew of him because of Galen. But I had never met Camdyn before he arrived here.”