Mimics of Rune 02- Surrender (31 page)

A white Maltese ran straight across the yard and through Lily’s door. Once inside, it shimmered into Maggie’s form. “Oh, thank the heavens that was open.” She swayed but grabbed the edge of the door.

James ran to her, lifted her into his arms and strode with her to the couch.

The moment he set her down, she stood up again. “I’m not—”

His groan came through louder than the ocean outside. “How many times have you shifted form in the last hour?”

Maggie waved him off.

“How many, Maggie?”

“More than you. Less than … someone else, I’m sure.” She went into the kitchen, opened the fridge and took out a bottle of water. “I’ll be fine.” The container pointed in Lily’s direction. “It’s you I’m worried about.”

“Why?” Cael and Lily asked at the same time, turning to Maggie.

“Well, darlin’ …” Maggie took a long drink. “Matthew got a message right before I let him come-to, requesting a new set of biological data from you with a STAT notice.”

25

Lily’s eyes widened with a fear Cael registered in his own body. “But Herri said they wouldn’t do anything again until tomorrow.”

“Who?” James asked.

“The doctor who was with me in the lab.”

“It won’t matter what she says if Matthew authorizes it,” Maggie said. “He has a hundred percent control of this facility. He authorizes every transaction, every line of data that escapes. He is the ‘man behind the curtain’.”

Lily’s sigh had everyone turning to her. “Roy was in the lab. He came in to ask for another sample.” Lily bit at the side of her lips—the spot Cael had kissed. “He didn’t say why, though. Oh … and he’s going by Randall.”

“That’s the name on the request.” Maggie chugged at her water. “The results of your tests with that Doc came through, too. She’s not going to be happy when she puts two and two together.” She gulped the last of her fluids.

“Two and … two?” Lily asked.

The shrug and droop of Lily’s shoulders had Cael enveloping her within his arms. “What’s in the results, Maggie?”

“Lily did all the tests too well for a pregnant woman. You’re going to be the new superstar … until she figures out you’re not.”

In the confines of his arms, her body trembled.

“I think I know what you’re talking about,” Lily said. “Mimics can’t shift when they’re pregnant, can they?”

Maggie rolled her eyes in a flourish of sarcastic response. “Of course they can’t—” She stopped as James glared at her. “Come on, people. How do you not know this?” She chugged another water bottle, went back into the fridge and produced an apple.

“Well, I for one haven’t ever been pregnant, so I can’t answer,” James said.

“When a Mimic is pregnant, all her abilities are transferred to the growing fetus for the nine month stint that they’re inside.” She pointed to her own stomach. “Its growth takes away your abilities.” She shook her head. “Anyway … once out, all your goodies come back. It’s a sucky-assed nine months, let me tell you.” Her eyes widened. One hand dropped to the counter.

“Maggie?” James rose in slow motion.

She waved him down. “I’m okay.”

He lowered himself back to the seat.

“I did all my normal changes—which totally blows my cover.” The break in Lily’s breath tore at Cael’s heart.

Seeming steadier, Maggie downed the remainder of her water. “The staff here thinks you’re pregnant because someone—presumably Roy—told them you were. We know you’re not, though, which is really odd if you and Cael did the deed.” Maggie wagged a finger between Cael and Lily. “And according to the paperwork, you were able to do all the minor transformations. So, either you’re really talented, your genes don’t react the same way as all other female Mimics, or you’re not pregnant.”

“Wouldn’t that take a while to know?” James asked.

Maggie glared at James. “No. Tell me you wouldn’t know the moment it happened if your little James wouldn’t get bigger?”

James laughed as Cael bit back his own chuckle.

“Unless there’s another way you know for sure.” Maggie waved the empty water bottle in Lily’s direction. “Lily?”

She jerked out of Cael’s arms.

He grabbed her and held her in place. “What’s going on, Lil?”

She shook her head, breath coming in spurts between sobs.

Cael lowered in front of her. “Lily, what’s wrong?” Hurt wavered through him.

Tears fell, one after the other, her lips pursed.

“Lily, please. Tell me what’s happened.”

“I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.
Please
.” He ran his hands up and down her arms, more for himself than for her as she continued.

“None of this is going right.”

“We can get around the pregnancy stuff here. That’s not the important part. Why has this upset you so much?”

Heaving sobs had her shoulders bumping. “I—I can’t have kids.” The words spilled out on a whisper.

“Just because it didn’t work this year doesn’t mean …”

Glassy eyes stared back at him. “Yes, it does.”

“Lily, it’s okay.”

“No!”

He jerked back at the force and tone.

“I can’t have kids! Ever!” Her scream followed her into the other room.

• • •

Lily ran to her bedroom, threw the door closed and flung herself onto the bed. She’d only ever told one person and sworn her to secrecy. In forty years, Charley hadn’t spoken a word about what Lily did. Lily hadn’t, either.

At the knock, she forced her sobs and tears into the pillow.

Cael would hate her. She knew it. He’d walk out on her and never talk to her again. Fresh tears formed and fell at the thought of losing her best friend, the man she had loved for so long.

Another knock.

She’d hoped he’d find someone and blend with them, or if they both made it to the end of their days, she’d stay with him as a Mimic and they’d never be able to have kids.

“Lily?”

All the ways she’d thought to tell him. All the stories she’d come up with over the years. One after the other, her mind had played through scenario after scenario, and never did the solution involve telling Cael outright.

The knob spun. “Lil? I’m coming in.”

With her face buried in the pillow, she cried.

A hand on her shoulder made her chest ache.

His body up against her side put so much pressure on her heart, she expected it to explode.

The fingertip at her ear, moving hair behind it, sent a chill through her core.

“Lily?”

She shook her head against the pillow.

“Please, Lil.”

More head shakes.

“Okay. I’m going to make some guesses. You just nod or say nothing or give me some sign if I’m close.” His hand trailed down her back. “You can’t get pregnant, which means you’ll never have kids. We’ll never have kids. I understood, right?”

At that, she nodded.

“Okay. We can deal with that. We have Chase, and there’s always adoption. Does this come from something that happened before we met? Because, Lil, this isn’t the first time we’ve done this during
the
week. And you didn’t get pregnant then, either.”

Pain erupted around her heart, her head, her eyes. Her entire body seized on her. A need to scream built, but not at Cael. At herself. She’d done it. She. Herself. Lily Crane. She’d ruined any chance of happiness with him.

“Relax, Lily. You’re shaking like mad.” He tucked her up against him.

She nudged herself so she could cry into his shoulder. Breathe him in and let her entire history evaporate with her tears on his shirt.

“You’re scaring me.”

“I’m sorry.” Her voice came out barely a whisper.

Cael’s finger pushed up her chin, though Lily refused to open her eyes. “I can see you in there, Lil.” He kissed both her lids before he moved to her lips.

Lily sunk into the embrace. She yearned for nothing more than to love and be loved by Cael. Nothing more than that. “I’m so sorry, Cael.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

“There is.” She beat a fist against his chest. “You don’t realize. It’s all my fault.”

“What is your fault? Nothing here is your fault. None of it, Lil.”

Her head rubbed against his shoulder. “I—” She clung to him. If she told him, he’d hate her.

“Do I need to call your mom down here and have her get this out of you?”

A small laugh broke through. The idea of having a mom again made her smile.

“There you go. A little laugh goes a long way.”

Buried against him, the answer crept around within her mind, seeking the outlet Lily refused to give it.

“Now, Lily. Tell me.”

“You’ll hate me, Cael.” That those words escaped made her shiver.

The finger against her chin bumped it up again. “Open your eyes.”

She did—to his bright, vivid, purples.

“Haven’t I said I’d never hate you? No matter what it is, I will never hate you. Ever, Lily.”

“I can’t have children.” A whoosh came with the words.

“I heard you say that. Now, why? Do you know? Maybe there’s—”

“I know.” Chills raced up and down her spine, wracking her body.

“Why?”

“Promise me you won’t hate me, Cael.”

“I promise.”

“Promise me.”

“I already did.”

“No, I mean—”

His hand rubbed against her cheek. “Lily Elizabeth Crane, I will never hate you.”

On a deep sigh, she said, “Do you remember when we first met?”

“Of course.” His lips curved up.

“And what happened within twenty-four hours of our meeting?”

He added a soft kiss to her lips. “I’ve never forgotten. Ever.”

“I got pregnant that night.”

His entire body went rigid. He said nothing, and his breathing stayed regular and calm. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Be—because—” The tears flowed again. “Because I didn’t know what was going on. I didn’t get what it meant. Nobody taught me anything. I’d been—they’d done—I didn’t know if it was you or someone else.”

His grip on her arms tightened.

“I didn’t know, at the time, that it could only
be
you.” She pressed against his chest, listening to the steady and undeterred sound of his heartbeat. “I’d only been out of the facility for two weeks. I thought maybe it was—what they’d last done to me. I didn’t know. I had to get rid of it. I didn’t know. I really, really didn’t know. Until you introduced me to Charley, and she explained.”

He still said nothing.

“But that was after. After I did the most horrendous thing I could ever do.” Lily jostled away from Cael. His arms fell limp at his side. “I didn’t
know
. I thought maybe they’d put something in there. I thought it was some sort of test, and they’d come back for me.” Through tear-coated eyes, she stared at Cael.

He hadn’t said anything.

“I kept thinking they’d injected me with something, and I found a doctor and made him take it out. All of it. And everything inside me that could hold or create or reproduce. Please believe me. I didn’t know.”

“But you didn’t tell me, either.”

Lily hung her head. “I didn’t know. Once Charley told me what had probably really happened, I left. Remember? I left for two weeks. I tried to kill myself. I walked into the middle of freeways. I jumped off a few buildings.”

“I remember that. The woman who jumped off a two-story building and didn’t even break a bone.”

“You see? I can’t do anything right. I was young. I’d spent five of my most important years being tortured. Only once I found you and Charley did I actually learn. If I’d known …” She bit her lips as they quivered. “If I’d known, Cael, I never would have—”

He slipped his hand behind her back and crushed his lips to hers.

Happiness warred with the fear that he’d stop and leave her still.

Cael slid his tongue between her lips. Lily accepted without hesitation. She tugged at his shirt, bringing him closer to her, wrapping herself in his warmth. Only when he slowed and separated did the cold return.

“You hate me, don’t you?”

His lips met hers again. “I can’t say I’m not sad, but, Lily?”

With her blink, her lashes dripped more water.

“I could never hate you. You’re a survivor. I love you. I want to marry you.”

“You what?”

“I want to marry you.”

“After everything I just told you?”

He chuckled against her. “Yes. Even more so.”

“But …”

“I’ve wanted to be with you since our first time, but you never let me again. I can understand, but tell me why.”

“I wanted you to find someone else. I was hoping you would, so you could have someone worthy of producing a little Cael. Something I can’t do.”

Once more, his lips met hers. “There’s never been anyone more worthy than you. And yes, I’m going to marry you, Lily.”

• • •

Lily’s announcement had jarred Cael for all of ten seconds. As he placed her fear alongside what he knew of the ordeal she’d been put through, he realized he could never, ever, hate her. He couldn’t even dislike her. He loved her. Always had. Always would. Kids or no kids.

They walked out of the room, hand in hand, and found Maggie and James on the couch. Him sitting with her head on his lap, his fingers trailing through her hair. Both of them must have been so lost in thought or each other that they hadn’t heard the door open or sensed Lily and Cael’s presence.

“Um …” Lil said.

Maggie jumped up and straightened, pushing away from James as if she’d burned herself.

James stood. “You okay, Lily?”

She nodded.

He cocked his head as if to ask the same question to Cael.

“We’re good.” Cael tugged Lily tight against him, his arm around her shoulders. “You?”

“We weren’t doing anything,” Maggie said. “Okay, so we’ve established you can’t have kids. Does anyone outside this room know that?”

Right back to business. Just like Maggie.

“Just Charley,” Lily said.

“So not Roy and not the government.” Maggie paced the room from each door. “I’ve been thinking.”

“Of course you have,” Cael said.

She held up a finger. “Roy’s always one step ahead, right?” Her blue-painted nail waved back and forth. “What if Roy wasn’t asking you questions about Cael to be chummy … but was digging? He was prepping. He was making sure you and Cael weren’t an item, so he could be sure you
weren’t
pregnant.”