Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic World (14 page)

BOOK: Mindfulness: An Eight-Week Plan for Finding Peace in a Frantic World
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Some people are genuinely incapable of feeling any sensations from some parts—or even most—of their bodies, at least initially. This comes as quite a shock, as it’s often the first time they’ve noticed this. They can feel pain and their sense of touch remains intact, but the normal, “run-of-the-mill” gentle humming sensations of a body that’s fully alive eludes them. If this is the case with you, then continue following the meditation on the website, doing what it says to do. Perhaps it will be helpful to imagine yourself as a naturalist, patiently waiting for a shy animal to appear, keeping the camera rolling even though nothing seems to be happening. Remember that you are not looking for anything special to happen. Eventually, you may find that some part of your body suddenly flickers with sensations, even if only fleetingly. Once you’ve found it, feel free to stay with it a little longer than the audio online suggests and explore its qualities a little more deeply. Then continue with the Body Scan. Over the course of this week, you may come to sense more and more of your body and progressively reconnect with it.

 

Ailsa found that there were some days when her mind was particularly unruly. Gradually, however, she came to accept this as part of an old habit of seeing everything as a threat or a challenge. She found that repeated practice with the Body Scan taught her that trying to wrestle with a restless mind meant that she’d go round in self-defeating circles. Eventually, she came to see, deep within, that meditation was not a competition. It was not a complex skill that she needed to perfect. The only discipline involved was regular and frequent
practice. She learned how to “be with” agitation—to explore it, rather than chase it away as if it was an unwelcome visitor. She learned to do the practice with a spirit of openness and curiosity.

 

Sometimes, especially early on, she kept falling asleep while doing the Body Scan. At first, she found this frustrating, but gradually realized that if you’re working long hours and not getting enough sleep at night, you’re going to be tired, so this was entirely natural. When she awoke again, she simply carried on where she left off. But sometimes, she’d just enjoy the nap without giving herself a hard time. Not criticizing herself or feeling guilty about it meant that she felt more enthusiastic about coming back to the meditation another time.

 

Such befriending of the body and mind is central to meditation. So when you feel that you are “failing” in your meditation, you can use even these feelings as a gateway to awareness, and to nonjudgmental acceptance of yourself as you already are, making space for these feelings of “failure”; seeing how such familiar judgments come and go as bundles of thoughts, feelings and bodily sensations. See how they bring tendencies to act in certain ways. See if it’s possible to watch as they arise and dissolve in the mind and body.

 
The Body Scan reveals the Doing mode
 

Listing all the things that you might experience when practicing the Body Scan, especially all of the possible difficulties, may make it seem like a hard slog. It isn’t always like this though. Many people find it the most relaxing experience they’ve had in a long time. One participant said it was like having a spa, floating in warm water—and cheaper too! Another said that it felt
like getting reacquainted with an old friend she had not been in touch with for decades. She felt a sense of profound connection to the deepest part of herself, and the tears that came were tears of joy.

 

So why mention all the difficulties? First, we don’t want you to be disappointed if the Body Scan does not immediately seem to be liberating you from stress. But there is also a second reason, and it is this reason that makes the Body Scan one of the most important practices you’ll be asked to do.

 

Remember the “Doing” mode of mind—the mode that never seems to let you off the hook—that gets you stuck in relentless and frantic busyness? If you look back to p.
28
, you’ll be reminded of the characteristics of “Doing” mode. They include judging everything, comparing the way things are with the way you want them to be and striving to make them different from how they actually are. They include being on automatic pilot much of the time, getting lost in thoughts that you take too literally and personally. Doing mode includes living in the past or future, and avoiding what you don’t like. Finally, the Doing mode sees the world indirectly, through a veil of concepts that short-circuit your senses so that you no longer directly experience yourself and the world.

 

Do you recognize these aspects of the Doing mode?

 

Each of these can be regular visitors during the Body Scan. But this means, equally, that each can be used as a teacher—helping you to recognize when the Doing mode of mind is showing up and trying to reassert its authority, trying its best to intervene to help you out in the only way it knows. So if you find yourself feeling restless, agitated, bored, sleepy or avoiding a
part of the body that you do not like, here is an opportunity to recognize this for what it is, and to begin, gradually, turning toward it rather than away from it. Or, if you find yourself on autopilot, as your mind wanders to the past or future, you can acknowledge this, seeing where your mind went and coming home again … and again … The going away and the coming back can turn out to be wonderful practice at making the elegant shift from Doing to Being. Then there will be times when you find yourself thinking
about
a part of the body and realize that you are not actually feeling it “from the inside” at all; when you have become lost in concepts, analyzing rather than sensing. So, when you notice this, you may begin to smile at the way the mind works so cleverly to get back to its own agenda! And in the smile is the awakening, the coming back to a direct sense of what it is like to be fully alive in this moment.

 

Now, if you have not already done so, pause for a few moments and decide when you will start the Body Scan. Once you’ve done so, you may wish to read through the guidance in the box on p.
97
. Then when the time for practicing comes, follow along with the guidance on track
2
found at
http://bit.ly/rodalemindfulness
.

 
Habit Releaser: going for a walk
 

Walking is one of the finest exercises and an excellent stress reliever and mood booster. A good walk can put the world in perspective and soothe your frayed nerves. If you really want to feel
alive
, go for a walk in the wind or rain!

 

Over the next week, we suggest you arrange to go for at least
one fifteen- to thirty-minute walk (or longer, if you wish). You don’t have to go anywhere special. A walk around your neighborhood, taken in an open frame of mind, can be just as interesting as a hike through the mountains.

 

There’s no need to feel that you have to rush anywhere; the aim is to walk as mindfully as you can, focusing your awareness on your feet as they land on the ground, and feeling the fluid movements of all the muscles and tendons in your feet and legs. You might even notice that your whole body moves as you walk, not just your legs. Pay attention to all of the sights, sounds and smells. If you’re in a city you’ll still see and hear a surprising number of birds and animals flapping and scurrying about. Notice how they react when they realize that you’ve seen them.

 

See if it is possible to be open to all your senses: smell the scent of flowers, the aroma of freshly cut grass, the mustiness of winter leaves or, perhaps, the smell of exhaust fumes and fast food; see if you can feel the breeze on your face or the rain on your head or hands; listen to the air as it moves; see how the patterns of light and shade can shift unexpectedly. Every moment of every season has a host of sensory delights—regardless of where you live.

 

Try stopping and looking upward too. If you are in a city, you’ll be surprised by how many beautiful architectural features are just above natural eye level. You might also see tufts of grass or even trees growing out of roofs and guttering. If you are in a park or in the countryside, you’ll see all manner of things, from birds’ nests to bees’ nests hidden in trees and bushes. If you’re feeling more ambitious, you could tag along with your local walking group. It could be the start of a lifelong hobby.

 
Appreciation here and now
4
 

Happiness is looking at the same things with different eyes.

 

Life only happens here—at this very moment. Tomorrow and yesterday are no more than a thought. So make the best of it. You do not know how long you have got. This is a positive message. It helps to give appreciat
ive attention to what is here now. How much appreciative attention do you have for the here and now? Become still and look around. How is the “now” for you?

 

You do not have to wait for the future to be an improvement on the present. You can find it here.

 

In Week One, you may have already discovered how easily we miss the beautiful things and how little attention they are given. Take time to pause for simple things, daily things. Maybe you can give a few of these activities or spontaneous events in your life extra attention.

 

Which activities, things or people in your life make you feel good? Can you give additional appreciative attention and time to these activities?

 
 
     
  • ____________________________________
  •  
     
  • ____________________________________
  •  
     
  • ____________________________________
  •  
 

Can you pause for a moment when pleasant moments occur?

 

Help yourself pause by noticing:

 
 
     
  • what
    body sensations
    do you feel at these moments?
  •  
     
  • what
    thoughts
    are around?
  •  
     
  • what
    feelings
    are here?
  •  
 

The ten-finger gratitude exercise

 

To come to a positive appreciation for the small things in your life, you can try the gratitude exercise. It simply means that once a day you bring to mind ten things that you are grateful for, counting them on your fingers. It is important to get to ten things, even when it becomes increasingly harder after three or four! This is exactly what the exercise is for—intentionally bringing into awareness the tiny, previously unnoticed elements of the day.

 
 

It’s difficult to overestimate the transformative power of such simple acts as a gentle walk. Janie’s experiences, for example, are not unusual: “The other morning I was walking along the river in the center of the city. It was a lovely morning. Then I noticed my mood take a dip. I suddenly thought what would happen to my partner and family if I should become seriously ill. It came from nowhere! I didn’t try to argue with the negative thoughts. I stopped and gently told myself: That hasn’t happened; worrying, worrying. A moment later, I noticed a seagull sitting on top of a post. Then I realized that every post along the river had a seagull sitting on top of it. They were all looking in slightly different directions. It was so comical to watch that I chuckled to myself. It cheered me up for hours afterward.”

 
Practices for Week Two
 
     
  • Body Scan practice (track
    2
    at
    http://bit.ly/rodalemindfulness
    ) at least twice a day, six out of seven days.
  •  
     
  • Carry out another routine activity
    mindfully
    (see box, p.
    76
    )—choose a different one from last week.
  •  
     
  • Habit Releaser—go for a walk for at least fifteen minutes at least once this week.
  •  
 
 
CHAPTER SEVEN
 
Mindfulness Week Three: The Mouse in the Maze
 

This planet has—or rather had—a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much most of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn’t the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.

 

DOUGLAS ADAMS
1

 

A
traveler to a small Greek island once watched as a young boy tried to persuade the family donkey to move. The boy had vegetables to deliver and he’d carefully loaded up the animal’s panniers. But the donkey wasn’t in the mood for moving. The boy became more and more agitated and started to raise his voice at the donkey, standing in front of him and
pulling hard on the rope. The donkey dug in its hooves firmly. Very firmly.

 

This tug of war might have gone on a long time if it wasn’t for the boy’s grandfather. Hearing the commotion, he came out of the house and took in the familiar scene at a glance—the unequal battle between donkey and human. Gently, he took the rope from his grandson. Smiling, he said, “When he’s in this mood, try it this way: take the rope loosely in your hand like this, then stand very close beside him, and look down the track in the direction you want to go. Then wait.”

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