Minding Frankie (50 page)
Authors: Maeve Binchy
And as they wound their way back to Emily and Hat’s house, where tea and cakes were being served, Noel felt a weight lift from his shoulders. He passed the house where Paddy Carroll and his wife, Molly, had slaved to raise their son, a doctor, and then past Muttie and Lizzie’s house, where those twins had found a better home than they could have dreamed of. He blinked a couple of times as he began to realize that a lot of things didn’t matter anymore.
Frankie wanted to walk the length of the road, even though she wasn’t really able to; Faith followed with the buggy but Frankie struggled hard, holding Noel’s hand and calling out “Dada” a lot. Just as they got to Emily and Hat’s place, her little legs began to buckle and Noel swung her up into his arms.
“Good girl, Daddy’s good little girl,” he said over and over. His chest was much less tight, the awful feeling of running down a long corridor gone. He put his other arm around Faith’s shoulders and ushered his little family into the house to have tea.
My dear, dear Frankie, my lovely daughter
,
I will never see you or know you, but I do love you so very much. I fought hard to live for you but it didn’t work. I started too late, you see. If only I had known that I would have a little girl to live for … But it’s all far too late for those kind of wishes now. Instead I wish you the very best that life can give you. I wish you courage
—
I have plenty of that. Too much, some might say! I hope that you will not be as foolhardy and as reckless as I was. Instead, may you have peace and the love of good people who will mind you and make you happy. Tonight I sit here in a ward where nobody can really sleep. It’s my last night here, you see, and tomorrow is your first day here. I wish we had been able to meet
.
But I know one thing. Noel will be a great father. He is very strong and he can’t wait to meet you tomorrow. He has been preparing for weeks, getting things ready for you, learning how to hold you, to feed you, to change you. He will be a wonderful dad and I have this very clear feeling that you will be the light of his life
.
So many people are waiting for you tomorrow. Don’t be sad for me—you have managed to make sense of my life eventually!
Live well and happily, little Frankie. Laugh a lot and be full of trust, not suspicion
.
Remember your mother loved you with all her heart
.
—
Stella
I would like to thank my editor, Carole Baron, and my agent, Chris Green, who have been hugely supportive and great friends to me during the writing of this book.
Maeve Binchy is the author of numerous best-selling books, including her most recent novel,
Heart and Soul
, in addition to
Nights of Rain and Stars, Quentins, Scarlet Feather, Circle of Friends
and
Tara Road
, which was an Oprah’s Book Club selection. She has written for
Gourmet; O, The Oprah Magazine; Modern Maturity
and
Good Housekeeping
, among other publications. She and her husband, Gordon Snell, live in Dalkey, Ireland.