Mistrust (2 page)

When we get out to the pool, Mom has already positioned herself, ready to take a million or so pictures. “Stand over here, Dakota.”

Sam follows me as I walk to where Mom’s pointing, already snapping pictures. Before long, I have Sam in the photos with me, and Mom continues with the broadest, proudest smile she can muster. “I think I’ve got about three hundred,” Mom says. “I’m certain Dad will love them. Come on, let’s go inside and wait for Levi.”

“Are you nervous about tonight?” Sam quietly asks me.

I’d confided in her that maybe Levi and I would finally go all the way tonight. He’s booked a hotel room, and without Mom and Dad knowing we’re planning to leave the prom early to go there. But I’ve been having second thoughts, and I just don’t think I’m ready for it. “I don’t know if I can,” I whisper to Sam as we keep an eye on Mom to make sure she’s not listening.

“If you’re not sure, then don’t do it. You don’t want to regret it. Just talk to Levi. He loves you, and if you’re not ready, tell him.” She brings her arm up to drape around my shoulders and pulls me in close for a hug.

“Who made you so responsible? You’re supposed to be fourteen, Sam, not logical and level-headed.” We both giggle, because we know Sam has always been the super smart one, the one who can look at a situation and instantly know what’s right and wrong. She’s been like that for as long as I can remember. As I lean in to kiss her cheek, there’s a knock on the door. “Eeeek,” I squeal happily and Sam jumps up and down, clapping.

Mom answers the door, and Sam leans in to whisper, “Just talk to him, okay?” Nodding my head, I bring her in to give her another tight cuddle.

“Hello, Mrs. Bennett, how are you?” I hear the deep gravel of Levi’s voice.

“Don’t you look handsome tonight, Levi? And I’m very well. Please come in. Dakota is waiting for you.” She opens the door further and Levi enters looking so hot. He’s wearing a black suit with a green tie that perfectly matches the color of my dress. His dark hair is nicely styled back, and his suit really emphasizes his broad shoulders.
I’m so lucky to have him.

“Oh my God,” Levi breathes when his gaze falls on me. Hungrily, he looks me up and down, and I see him gulp while his eyes appear glued to me. “You look . . .” He shakes his head and shoves a hand in his pocket. Seemingly speechless, he leans in close and under the guise of kissing my cheek, he whispers, “You look good enough to eat.” My heart beats quicker and my cheeks burn with an obvious flush. Pulling back, he smiles at me and hands me a corsage. “I can’t talk, I’m blown away by how gorgeous you are.”

“Thank you,” I say while looking down at the vibrant pink rose. “Will you pin it on me?” Taking it out of the clear plastic container, I hand it to Levi to pin on my dress.

“You two look so cute together,” Mom gushes and I hear the camera clicking.

Both Levi and I turn to look at Mom, who’s busy staring at us from behind her active lens. “Okay, well, we should get going,” Levi announces once the flower is pinned to my dress.

“Have you got your keys?” Mom asks. I double-check my clutch and nod my head. “If you can’t get home, call me and I’ll come to get you. And no drinking,” she says the last part in her firm ‘mom’ voice, while pointing her finger.

“I won’t, Mom.” Levi opens the door while I give Sam and Mom another hug.

We walk out the door hand in hand and head toward the car Levi hired. “Oh wow,” I squeal excitedly. “A limousine!” The long black car waits out on the street in front of my house, and the uniformed driver is standing beside it with the back passenger door open for us. “Oh my goodness,” I murmur as I excitedly clasp my hand to my mouth.

“Nothing but the best for my girl.” Levi holds me close against his body. “I love you.” He leans down and brushes his lips across mine. “I’d do anything to put a smile on your gorgeous face.” His fingers flex against my hip as he makes me a silent promise about tonight.

My heart is pounding inside my chest, and I feel as if a swarm of butterflies have taken up residency in the pit of my belly. When we reach the car, he holds out his hand to help me slide in first. Once I’m settled inside the back of the car, Levi slides in beside me and the driver gently closes the door, then goes around to the front to get into the driver’s seat.

“How are you feeling?” Levi asks quietly. I know the question is more about our plans for
after
the dance, rather than the dance itself.

I lift my head to see the privacy partition is up, separating us from the driver. “I’m not sure I’m ready, Levi,” I openly admit. With my blood thrumming loudly through my veins, I hold my breath and watch Levi’s reaction to my words.

“Oh.” The hopeless defeat in his voice makes me squirm in my seat with guilt.

“I’m so sorry. But I don’t think I can give you
that
tonight.” This is the first time I’ll be having sex, and even though I know I love Levi, something is telling me to wait.

“Yeah, okay,” Levi responds dejectedly and sits back in his seat. He turns his head and looks out the window, while his left leg bounces up and down. “I thought you loved me, Dakota.” He doesn’t turn his head to look at me, and the knot in my stomach tightens even more. He’s disappointed in me, but I’m not ready to give him my virginity. I can’t do something that doesn’t
feel
right.

“Can you please wait for me?” I move my hand to touch his arm, hoping he won’t hate me.

He takes a deep breath and slowly his shoulders move up and drop as he expels the air. Levi turns to look at me. His features don’t seem harsh, “Of course I can wait,” he responds and leans in to give me a small kiss on the forehead.

Suddenly the butterflies leave my stomach and I let out a ragged breath. “I’m sorry if I’ve lead you on.” I slide my hand down to his so we can link our fingers.

“Don’t worry about it. We’ve been together for seven months now and I thought it was time. But I can wait, I suppose.” He trails his fingers up and down my bare arm while leaning in to kiss my temple. “It’ll be fine,” he mumbles against my forehead.

We arrive at the prom and can hear the thumping of the music from the street. As we walk in, I let out a soft gasp, taking in the brightly colored decorations transforming our usually drab gym into a place of magic.

“Let’s get a photo together,” Levi says as he pulls me toward one of the four photo booths already set up.

“Like we haven’t had enough.” I laugh, referring to the scene with Mom as Levi leads me to a booth.

We spend a few moments taking pictures, and head over to where our friends are sitting.

“Hey,” Jordan sings out as she stands and gives me a hug. “You look beautiful.”

“Thanks, Jordan, but your dress is killer! Crap, check out how low that V is.” I point to where the point of the V stops, inches above her navel. Jordan is one of my best friends. There are four of us in our group; Jordan, Lindsey, Mariah, and me. We’re incredibly close, and have no secrets between us.

“I know,” she coyly responds. “Aaron can’t keep his hands off me.” Aaron is Jordan’s boyfriend and one of Levi’s friends from the basketball team.

“Hey.” I look over to Levi and see Reece has arrived. Reece is Levi’s best friend and those two do practically everything together. They hang out all the time and play ball after school and even on weekends. Reece’s gaze slowly roams over me, and I feel a rush of heat travel up my spine. “You look breathtaking, Dakota,” he says as he leans over to give my cheek a light peck.

“Thank you.” I glance behind him. “You’re not here with anyone?”

“Nope.” He smiles. “The person I like doesn’t even know I exist.” His words are full of sorrow. The worst part though, is that he’s clearly accepted this as fact.

“You should fight for what you want,” I respond.

“Yeah, fight for it,” Levi adds, then turns to give me a wink.

“Anyone want a drink?” Reece asks and moves from foot to foot, suddenly looking uncomfortable being here.

“Grab me a Coke,” Levi says. “Want anything, babe?” he asks me.

“Any type of soda please.”

Reece looks at me, then Levi. “One soda coming up.” He smiles at me. “You can get your own,” he says, playfully punching Levi’s shoulder as he turns to get us a drink.

“Get me a drink, dick!” Levi yells at Reece and Reece turns to flip him off. “Asshole,” he mumbles before jogging after him to catch up.

“Oh my God. Look at Mr. C.” Jordan stares over my shoulder as I sit next to her. Just as I turn to look, Lindsey comes to sit with us. “Hey.” Jordan and I smile at her.

“Who are we looking at?” Lindsey asks.

“Mr. C,” Jordan answers.

Lindsey shivers but looks toward Mr. C, who’s over in the far corner staring at us. “Oh crap,” Lindsey says and looks away. She giggles and her hand covers her mouth as her shoulders come up, looking like she’s been caught staring at the cute guy at the mall.

“He creeps me out.” A shudder of grossness and revulsion runs over me. “There’s something off about him.”

“Last week, Aaron and I went to the movies and he was there. It’s freaky,” Jordan says as she sneaks a look over at Mr. C.

“That’s why we call him Mr. C and not Mr. Collins. The C is for creepy.” Both Lindsey and Jordan laugh.

“You know, I went to the mall the other day, and I swear to God, I saw him sitting in a car in the parking lot just outside the mall. It wasn’t his car, it was another one. He was just sitting there, not doing anything. I waved to him, and he looked right through me. It was like he didn’t see me, but I know he did,” Lindsey says, her face contorting with disgust.

“Yuck.” I pretend to gag and can feel my forehead scrunching.

“Here’s your drink, Dakota.” Reece hands me a cup of soda and sits opposite me. Levi sits beside him.

I thank him and place the cup on the table in front of me.

“Oh I love this song! Let’s go dance.” Lindsey eagerly stands and seductively moves her body on the spot. “Come on, this is our prom!”

As Jordan and I head out to the dance floor, I turn back to see both Levi and Reece staring at us. Blowing a kiss to Levi, he catches it and sends one back. “You two are so cute together,” Lindsey says when we get to the dance floor.

“Yeah I know,” I respond with a smile, because really, I do know how lucky I am to have him.

“You two are going to finally have sex tonight, right?” she asks in a lower tone.

Shaking my head I look down at the floor to avoid the look I know she’s giving me. “I’m not ready.”

“How can you not be ready? You’ve been with him practically forever. Even Aaron and I have done it. Just do it and get it over with.” Lindsey nods in agreement with Jordan’s words.

“Hey, what are you girls talking about?” Mariah asks as she joins us on the dance floor.

“Dakota doesn’t want to have sex with Levi.” Lindsey fills her in. “Hell, if you’re not going to have sex with him, I certainly will,” she playfully taunts. But I know she’d never betray me like that. We’re all tight, like sisters. “He’s mighty fine, he is.” She looks at me pointedly.

“I know. But, I’m not ready,” I say again for all their benefit. “Anyway, we talked about it on the way over here. He was really good about it and said he understood.”

The girls all nod and sigh, telling me how lucky I am that he’s so understanding. The discussion about Levi and me finally wraps up and we spend the next four songs dancing and having the best night of our lives. Mr. C is around, standing in the corner looking creepy, and a few other teachers are all walking around ensuring the night is problem-free. Mrs. Walker, our English teacher, is standing by the drinks table making sure no one is spiking anything with alcohol.

“I’m really hot, I need a drink,” I say to the girls while fanning myself.

“I’m going to keep dancing,” Mariah says and the other two agree with her.

I leave the dance floor and head toward our table. Everyone’s gone, and the table is completely isolated. Picking up my soda I look around the gymnasium, checking everyone out. Mr. C has moved from the corner and is mingling around the students dancing. I see Levi over on the other side talking to some of the guys on his basketball team. He sees me, and blows me a kiss.
He’s the cutest, sweetest guy ever.

I’m so thirsty I down my soda all in one go.

Putting my cup back on the table, I sit and watch the others dancing for a few minutes. Still feeling thirsty, I make my way over to the drinks table and grab another soda.

Mrs. Walker watches me as I pour a drink into a new cup. “Having fun?” she asks once I’ve had a sip. “You’re not dancing?” she questions, looking from me and my friends.

“I was dancing with the girls, but I’m so hot and thirsty I’m taking a few minutes out. Then I’m going straight back out with my new dancing shoes.” I lift my dress slightly to show her my gold strappy heels.

“Very cute,” she responds with a smile, staring at my heels. The music changes into another fast track and Mrs. Walker does a small shuffle on the spot. I have a giggle at her because she’s getting into the music.

Heading back to the table, I decide to relax for a few minutes before I join my friends back on the dance floor. I’m sitting, sipping my soda, when suddenly I’m overcome with an awful queasy feeling of lightheadedness. “What the hell?” I mumble to myself. I must’ve overdone it on the dance floor. I grip the edge of the seat as my head starts spinning. Trying to swallow through my parched throat, I grab my first empty glass and get every last drop out of it, then lift the second empty glass and try to get every drop from that, too.

I bring my hand up to my forehead to wipe away the sweat forming and notice my face is on fire. My body is still heating up and my head spins around and around. The music begins to blur while colorful spots are forming everywhere I look
. I don’t know what’s happening to me.

I need to get some water on my face and some fresh air in my lungs. My stomach churns as my head whirls, losing my grip on what’s going on.

Making a beeline for the bathroom, I push through the door and go directly to the sink. Splashing cold water on my face, I try and focus on the girl’s reflection in the mirror, but I can’t see her clearly. She’s jumbled and doesn’t look anything like me. Her face is pasty and white, her eyes are bloodshot, and she looks like a shadow of the girl I’m used to seeing.