Misty (8 page)

She shook her head quickly and looked down.

“Because if you want, I'll stop talking and you can tell us about it.”

“All right, Misty,” Doctor Marlowe said.

“I don't want to stifle anyone, Doctor Marlowe. If Cathy can't wait to tell us about herself. . .”

“Stop being mischievous,” she warned.

“Am I being mischievous?” I asked Jade. She laughed and nodded.

“What do you think, Star?”

“I think if you're going to tell your story, tell it already. Afterward,” she added, “we'll decide if you are mischievous or not. But if I had to vote now,” she quickly added, “I'd say you had some of the devil in you.”

All of us laughed, even Cathy, but her laugh was short, insecure, careful. Who burned the smiles off her face? I wondered.

“I didn't really think that Charles Allen and I would become an item just because we both had parents who were into divorcing. The gossip about Charles Allen was that he had an older girlfriend who was a freshman at the University of Southern California. What I found out was he had a cousin in her first year at USC, but there was nothing romantic about it.

“He has his own car, a BMW convertible. I learned later that he has a trust left to him by his grandfather on his father's side. I don't know how much exactly, but it's pretty obvious that it's a lot of money. He offered to drive me home. I thought why not and it started.

“On the way to my house we talked about our parents a little. It was easy to see he wasn't all that close with either his father or his mother. His mother is an elegant
looking lady, tall and thin, but a little wide in the hips. My mother would blame that on her child-bearing and say, ‘See, that's why I didn't want to have another.'

“Although Charles Allen's mother isn't as concerned about her looks as my mother is, she looked like she was the type who was never surprised.”

“Surprised?” Star asked.

“What I mean is no matter what time of day anyone sees her, his mother would always be stylishly dressed. Charles Allen said she was involved in various charities and sat on the boards of a number of non-profit organizations. He thought it was ironic that she gave so much of herself to the sick and the downtrodden and so little to him.

“Like me, he had a nanny when he was little. After that, he was mostly cared for by maids and butlers and chauffeurs. He said his parents even hired people to play with him. One day, he said he felt as if his parents were doing all they could to avoid being with him. ‘Keep me occupied and away from them,' he muttered, ‘that was their motto.' ”

“Don't they like their own son?” Star asked.

I shrugged. “I think they just don't like children, their own included.”

“Rich people make me sick,” she said.

“Poor people can behave just as poorly,” Jade reminded her.

They looked like they could get into a real argument, so I quickly went on with my story.

“The second time we left school together, I went to his house and got the tour. His mother was just on her
way out to a meeting. Charles Allen made sure to perform the proper introductions, however.

“Perform was his word. He told me he felt most of the things he did for and with his parents had always felt like little scripted acts.

“ ‘Mother,' he said, ‘I'd like you to meet Misty Foster. Misty, this is my mother, Elizabeth Howe Fitch.'

“Wow. I take it that his parents are very formal,” Jade said.

“That's an understatement. His father's name is Benjamin Harrison Jackson Fitch.”

“I bet it takes him forever to fill out forms,” Star quipped.

“He probably doesn't fill out anything,” Jade returned. “He has lawyers who do it for him, I'm sure.”

“Can I continue?” I asked them. They both zipped up their lips.

I went on.

“His mother offered her long, thin, bejeweled fingers. The moment I touched them, she pulled them away as if I might be diseased. Charles Allen told me not to be offended by that. His mother had a thing about contact. She absolutely hated hugging and was an expert at the false kiss.”

“What's that?” Cathy asked. Star and Jade turned as if just remembering she was there.

“She kisses the air and not your cheek. Charles Allen said she even kissed his father that way. He said he had never seen his mother and father kiss on the lips.”

“No wonder he had a woman on the side,” Star said. I nodded.

“How did Charles Allen kiss?” Jade asked with a sly smile and impish eyes.

“Not very well at first. He took me through the house that day, as I said, and we played some Ping-Pong in the game room. There's also a pool table and a hockey game in it. He showed me their gardens, pool and tennis court and then, he took me to his room. It was as big as my parents' bedroom, only his has a built-in television set and CD player, and everything. You should see his closet. It's so organized, color coordinated. And his drawers, the socks, underwear, everything looks brand new. Some of his things are even in wrappers!

“We sat and talked for a while about each other's home life. He claimed he didn't see his father that often before the divorce, but now he said it was more of an organized, scheduled meeting. Once a week, he had to go to his father's office and give him a report about his school work.

“I think what bothered me about his world was how formal everything was. All of his servants called him Charles Allen. His mother called him Charles Allen and, although I never met him, I imagined his father did, too. Everyone was so. . .proper. It made me uncomfortable.

“Anyway, toward the end of our little talk, which he called a tête-à-tête. . .ever hear of that?”

Jade nodded, but Cathy and Star shook their heads.

“We were sitting on this small sofa in his room. He was on one end and I was on the other. There was enough space between us to put another person, and toward the end of this little talk as I said, he paused, looked at me with those heart-melting eyes and said,
‘I've always wanted to talk to you, but I never could think of anything to say until I heard about your parents divorcing.'

“ ‘At least one good thing has come out of it,' I said and he laughed.

“Charles Allen has two definite kinds of laughs. One, sounds more like a robot, each sound perfectly spaced from the other and always the same amount, like ha, ha, ha. It's hard to explain, but his other laugh, what I call his real laugh, is soft. It makes his eyes brighten and does something cute in the corner of his mouth. You're looking at me as if I'm crazy, but you've just got to see and hear it to understand.

“Of course, I knew what he meant. He had always had a crush on me. For a moment I didn't know what to say, and then I said, ‘I was always hoping you would speak to me.' Of course, that was a bright, white lie, but he obviously was pleased.

“ ‘Most of the girls in our school are vapid,' he said. I didn't know what vapid meant. I thought we had recently had it on a vocabulary test, but I hadn't studied for that test and I failed it.

“ ‘I know what you mean,' I said. It seemed like the thing to say, which pleased him again.

“ ‘I thought you might,' he told me. ‘I bet there really isn't anyone with whom you care to share your feelings concerning your parents' divorce,' he added.

“Then he sat back and started to describe what it was like for him, really like . . .how he thought of his family in terms of this big, powerful train, and how it was running along efficiently and perfectly, but all of a sudden
the chief engineer and his assistant got into a dispute and the train began to sway with its wheels screeching around turns for a while until it went off the tracks and came to a grinding halt. I didn't know what to say. It sounded. . . smart and yet, it sounded silly, too, until he added, ‘Sometimes, I feel like jumping off the train. How about you?'

“Yes, I thought, I do. I want to run away. Maybe that was a good idea. I told him and he and I got into this great discussion about how we would live on our own. I actually began to think it was possible. He knew how to get some of his money. It sounded. . .romantic.

“Suddenly, he crossed the space between us and kissed me on the lips. It was sort of clumsy. He practically fell on my face.

“ ‘I hope you don't mind,' he said.

“I shook my head. He made it sound like he had just helped me with my books or something. Then he did it again, only this time it was longer and better.

“ ‘You're the first girl I've brought to my room,' he told me softly.

“I don't know. . .” I looked at Doctor Marlowe. She nodded so slightly to encourage me, only I could tell she was doing it, I thought. “I guess I wanted someone to say nice things to me so much, I would have welcomed the lips of Jack the Ripper. My heart started to beat wildly. We kept our faces very close, the tips of our noses practically touching. I closed my eyes and he kissed me again.”

Cathy really began to squirm in her seat. She looked like she had sat on an ant hill. Doctor Marlowe's face
took on a worrisome expression. Star stared at me with almost an angry turn in her mouth, but Jade just gazed with eyes that suggested boredom. Did she think I was some little teenager, miles below her world of romantic experiences? I'll show her, I thought.

“Our tongues touched this time,” I said emphatically. Jade's eyebrows rose a bit. “Some boys are very sneaky about how they get to put their hands on you, but Charles Allen just went ahead and brought his hands up along my ribs and pressed his palms over my breasts.”

Cathy lowered her head and stared at the floor.

“Wow,” Star said. “Mr. Proper loses control.” She raised an eyebrow as she looked at me.

“I don't let just any boy touch me,” I said sharply, “so I pushed his hands away.”

“What did he do then?” Jade questioned impatiently.

“He ignored it and kissed me on the neck. No one had ever kissed me like that on the neck before. The feeling scared me. It shot right through my body and I pulled back to my side of the sofa.

“He was so polite, he started to apologize, but I didn't want to hear that. I was confused. My heart felt like it was a kaleidoscope of emotions. I was afraid and yet I didn't want him to stop. I wanted to be kissed and held and needed.

“ ‘Stop being so damn polite,' “ I ordered him.

Now he was the one who looked confused.

“ ‘I'm not being so damn polite,' he said. ‘I just don't take advantage of people, especially when they're vulnerable.'

“That damn vocabulary of his, I thought. ‘What's that supposed to mean?' I demanded.

“ ‘You're at a weak point because of what's happening with your parents,' he said, which just got me madder. He was a lot smarter than I ever imagined. He was manipulating me.

“ ‘I am not,' I fired back. ‘I don't care what they do to themselves.'

“He smirked arrogantly. I felt like slapping him.

“ ‘The only reason you stopped is you're afraid,' I told him.

“ ‘What do you mean? You pushed me away,' he said.

“ ‘You were just moving too fast. Girls do that when boys move too fast.'

Laughter rippled over his pretty-boy face.

“ ‘What's so funny?' I demanded.

“ ‘I was hardly moving very fast. You're just afraid, which is normal for a girl who is still a virgin,' he said.

“I was afraid, of course, but thanks to Doctor Marlowe, I now know I was afraid because I feared being like my mother, who, according to what my father said, found sex painful and unpleasant. I thought I would end up just like she did and drive away someone who had loved me,” I recited. Doctor Marlowe nodded, pleased.

“So what did you do?” Star asked.

“ ‘How do you know I'm still a virgin?' I fired back at him.

“He laughed that arrogant laugh and said, ‘Oh, you're a virgin, all right. Pure as the driven snow.'

“ ‘That's what you think,' I said. He laughed again and I said, ‘Do you want to touch me?' ”

“Is she telling the truth?” Star suddenly asked of Doctor Marlowe.

“You'll have to ask her and judge for yourself, Star. You'll all have to do that with each other.”

Star curled her lip up and narrowed her eyes.

“So then what happened?” she queried like some cross-examiner out to prove perjury.

“He just sat there, a little shocked, I think. I really felt like shocking him, I suppose. So, I started to unbutton my blouse. He looked frozen and I guess I felt so powerful because of what I was doing to him that I continued.”

Cathy lifted her head and looked at me with new interest in her eyes.

“My heart was pounding, but I reached back and unclipped my bra. I just sat there with it hanging loosely. His face got all red.

“ ‘Well?' I asked him, ‘Do you want to see and touch me or not?' ”

“You were really playing with him,” Star commented. “Like playing with a Yo-Yo or something,” she added, nodding at Jade who rested her chin on her hand and stared at me, barely breathing.

“It felt like I was an actress in a play performing a role. He nodded and I took off my bra.”

It was so quiet in the office, I could hear the water running through the pipes on the other side of the house.

“What did he do after you took off your bra?” Star asked breathlessly.

“What do you think?” I tossed back at her.

“You did it in his room the first time you were there with him!”

“No, not that time. A different time,” I said, “but only once.”

“Only once? Why?” Star asked.

For a long moment, I couldn't bring out the words. It was like swallowing a wad of gum and waiting for it to go down. They stared. Finally, I had enough air in my lungs to speak.

“Because I found out he was a bigger liar than all our parents put together,” I told her.